Kevin was just an ordinary boy, -other than the fact that he was a Korean Idol-  he loved to watch television, and play games, talk with friends, and mainly, perform. But something felt off, he didn't feel complete. Some nights he would just lay awake in bed and not get any sleep, just. Thinking. thinking about life and relationships, missing his parents, friends, but the most important subject his mind ran off to was, his ual orientation. 

Kevin never had a girlfriend, doubted he ever would, but he kind of dreamed about boys. Every time, he quickly shook his head to dismiss the thought. But this one time, he didn't and he let his imagination run wild. He dreamed of this tall, Asian, muscular man, with blonde hair in a Mohawk type of style, and he dreamed that this man looked at him in a coffee shop and smiled, then took a sip of his coffee before looking back to his laptop. Kevin felt butterflies in his stomach and shut his eyes, making the image in his mind more clear. The man then shut his laptop and walked to Kevin's table, sitting across from him and looking him dead in the eyes. "I'm Eli, and I want you in-" 

"Kevin! COME OUT HERE!" The thought was quickly cut off by one of Kevin's band mates, named Eli, who looked remarkably similar to the man in Kevin's dream. He sounded scared and nervous.

Kevin shot up, and looked around before running out of the door.  "Eli? what's wrong?" Kevin worriedly looked around the dorm room, not seeing Eli. "ELI!? WHERE ARE YOU?" Kevin started to get really worried, his face, drooped and he franticly looked around, until Eli popped out from behind the couch, growling and hugging Kevin from behind. "AHH!" Kevin screamed and looked behind him, seeing Eli's face, the light hit it perfectly, it enhanced every little feature on Eli's face, his eyes were gleaming, his lips, looked so kissable, so did his cheeks, and his nose. Kevin couldn't resist the red tint that took over his cheeks, and the wide grin that took over his lips. and the quick heaviness that fell upon his head as he looked down to hide the sensation overload on his face.

"Kevin, you're so huggable, I could just hug you all day." Eli cutely stated as he gave a quick squeeze to Kevin's torso. 

The smile on Kevin's lips grew and he lifted his head up and turned around in Eli's arms, wrapping his own around the other boy's neck and didn't speak, he just stared into Eli's eyes and smiled more. Eli noticed and shifted, slightly uncomfortably and cleared his throat, "why are you staring at me like you love me Kevin?" Eli tilted his head, but moved his hands to rest on Kevin's waist. 

Kevin shook his head to clear his thoughts and pulled away. "Nothing." Kevin looked at the ground. Am I in love with Eli? is that why the man in my dream was named Eli? am I gay? questions flew through Kevin's mind at 1000 Miles a minute. 

"Kevin don't lie to me, you seem like you have feelings for me. Is this true." Eli looked at Kevin, confused. Eli was always blunt, he just said what was on his mind, no matter what it was. one time, the band was out to dinner, and this overweight woman sat at the table next to them, and Eli, being the idiot that he is, asked when the baby was due. "It's okay if you do. I wont tell any one."

"No! of course I don't! I'm as straight as straight can get."  Kevin forced a chuckle.

"Good. Because that would be weird, and wrong. I would never love a man, it would just be, weird." Eli smiled and patted Kevin's shoulder on his way to his room to play video games.

Kevin sighed before leaving the room and walking into the kitchen, looking for any thing he could find, honestly, he could care less about his weight. So he found a tub of ice cream and a large spoon and headed off to his room, shutting the door before he could hear Eli call his name. Kevin sat on his bed, shoveling spoonfuls into his mouth. I'm gay. I'm gay. I'm gay. He kept repeating to him self in his mind and crying. Thinking about the swirl in his stomach, and the smile on his lips, the electricity he felt when Eli held him, and determined that he was in fact, in love with Eli. 

He was still about half way done with the ice cream, with a tear-stained face and a blanket swung around his shoulders. His pants were stained with ice cream he rubbed off his hands from the tub. And his shirt, some how was across the room, probobly from rage at himself, and he threw it across the room in anger. No tears were coming out of his eyes, they were all on his face and trailed down his chest.

"Kevin?" Dongho whispered as he opened the door. "I heard you crying." He steped in and closed the door behind him. "whats wrong?"

"Get out you little ." Kevin gets really mad and defensive when he's sad. "I don't need your help or any one elses help." He slams the icecream to the floor and laid down on his side.

"Kevin." Dongho said reassuringly, sitting  on the edge of the bed and gently places a hand on Kevin's side. " I wont judge you, or be mad at you, I just want you to be happy." You see, Dongho had a secret of his own. He himself was gay, and has a crush on Kevin. Ever since Dongho walked into the training room on his first day, and saw Kevins beautiful face, he fell in love. "You're in love with someone who doesn't love you back huh?"

"How did you know?" Wiping his eyes and looking up at Dongho, the blanket falling off his body, exposing it.

Dongho blushed a deep red seeing Kevin's body, whose pants were way too low, exposing his hip bones, Dongho's favorite part of the male body. He looked at the ground. "Because that used to be my tub of icecream." He was talking about when he ate icecream, being sad about Kevin.

"I'll pay for it." Kevin replied with no emotions anymore, he seemed to be drained of all feelings, and walked into the kitchen, hoping to find some Soju. When he spotted Eli out of the corner of his eye. "I... I thought you were in your room." He mumbled, trying to cover his body. 

"I heard you crying. And I think I know why." Eli said, looking more sad than ever.

Authors note: sorry this probobly . I'm new to writing fan fics, but thanks to all my subscribers already ^.^ I hope you like the story, I plan on it being long.