December 24, 2010

It was Christmas Eve at downtown New York. People are smiling and sending love to each other in the crowd of Rockefeller center. It was always busy around Christmas night at Rockefeller Center, with Special biggest Christmas tree they claimed to be and beautiful sight of garden decorated with angels sculpture made of ice on it. You sat alone there, trying to catch a little bit happiness sent by laugh and smiles from people around you. It’s not that you weren’t feeling happy or grateful, but this Christmas, would be your first Christmas without your mom and dad to give you blessed and gift.

It’s been four months since the accident that took your parent, happiness and a part of your life away from you. That day was supposed to be your happiest day if the accident wasn’t happening on the first place. You were about to go to your first solo performance on the school talent night, playing a song your mom wrote for you on your birthday as gift. You never play it in front of her before, and you intentionally wanted to give her a nice surprise that night, before everything ruined by a severe car accident happen to you and both of your parent. You survived that night, although that accident took your chance of playing piano again for only-God-knows how long. Your right arm bones were severely injured when you unconsciously blocked your head from hitting the car window. The last thing you remember was a big truck coming through the way your car was heading to and the sound of a metal crashed when the front part of the truck hit the left side of which you and your parent are sitting in. And the next morning, you wake up in pain and tears as you found out that the two people you love the most in the whole world were already gone forever.

You were sitting on one of the bench in the garden with angel ice sculpture until more people are coming and sat there, narrowing the space you had and they unintentionally hit your injured right hand several times. Felt like you can’t enjoy your time being there anymore, you walk slowly outside the Rockefeller plaza and just follow wherever your feet took you to. Snowflakes are coming down as you walk along the Wall Street, and you realized you weren’t prepared yourself with a warm coat and gloves when the snow falling harder and your body squirmed from the cold. You just had your Jeans and t-shirt and thick jacket with you to shield you from the cold, so when you saw a small church across the street, you thought it would be your best chance to avoid yourself from getting a frostbite or even frozen.

You were surprised when you walk inside the church. It looks like a small and homely church from the outside when you first saw it from the street, but inside it was decorated nicely. The dome wasn’t big, but just enough to show the beautiful painting on it. Two beautiful Christmas tree was put on left and right side of the altar. And the way they hang the colorful small lights on the altar makes it look heavenly. Your heart feels warm enjoying this beautiful sight until you saw a white grand piano at a corner of the stage near the altar. You felt like something punched inside your heart and suddenly your eyes wet by the tears you trying hard to avoid from falling.

You never thought seeing something you really like since you were 6 years old could be this hurtful. Seeing a piano always brought your memory to that night again, brought you to the reality that you can’t play your fingers on those black and white keys again, until your right arm injury is recover, which you’re not sure when will it happen.