WARNING: CHARACTER DEATH

(This is not a new oneshot. For more info, please refer to THIS BLOG.)
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Minho stared at them blankly. He was pretty sure they didn't know he was there. And even if they did know, he didn't think they would care.

Jonghyun moaned as he ed SeKyung. ''I'm sorry'' Minho mouthed to the pair with tears rolling down his face. He left, remembering to quietly shut the bedroom door behind him.

He went to his cousin's house, the only place he could think of to go in his senseless state. He walked through the door, and he knew she was asking what had happened. But he didn't hear her. He collapsed on the spare mattress she always kept in the guest bedroom and went immediately to sleep.

When Minho woke up, Jonghyun's voice could be heard in the living room. He didn't come out of the bedroom, desperately wanting to escape from Jonghyun. Instead, he climbed out the window and climbed down the fire escape. He wandered the area until early the next morning, when he was sure Jonghyun would be gone.

He walked in the door of his cousin's house to a rather unwelcome surprise. Jonghyun was on the couch, his eyes were red and Minho just knew that Jonghyun knew. His cheeks turned red with embarrassment, and he had no idea why. Why did he suddenly feel like he was the one who did something wrong?

    "Please, just leave. There's nothing you can say," Minho moved to go back to the spare room and Jonghyun grabbed him around the wrist. He didn't even think when he punched Jonghyun in the face. Minho didn't say a word, and it hurt more than he ever thought possible when Jonghyun's grip slackened.

Jonghyun didn't come back after that. He had apparently received the message that Minho didn't want to see him anymore. It was embarrassing to be pitied the way he was. He could see it in his cousin's gaze, that she pitied him. He was that guy who got cheated on.

He slipped into a deep depression, and most days he wandered. He looked at the world with an empty gaze. It was horrible, the feeling of not being able to feel. He looked at children playing football in the park and he was startled to realize the sight didn't give him the usual warm feeling in his chest. It scared Minho.

After months of not hearing from Jonghyun, he made his way back to their (used to be shared) apartment. He thought that it had hurt before, when Jonghyun cheated on him. But when he'd heard no word from Jonghyun, not even an 'I'm sorry', it was like someone had slowly driven a dull railroad spike in his heart.

He wondered if Jonghyun hated him, or was disgusted with him. He had to be, after all, to never even try to call Minho. He went up the elevator, not even sure of what he was doing. He got off on the 10th floor, and just as the elevator doors shut behind him, the apartment door opened.

Minho knew he had made a mistake as soon as he saw them.

They were together, and he was smiling and laughing. He had his arm around her, and the railroad spike in Minho's heart suddenly turned deadly sharp. All Minho could think about was if Jonghyun was cheating on her too. He turned around and pressed the elevator button repeatedly, praying the doors would open right up. He cursed silently when he heard his name called. Then the elevator doors finally opened up and he literally ran inside. Jonghyun caught the elevator just as it was about to close, and Minho actually cursed out loud. Jonghyun looked unsure of himself, hopeful and guilty all at once.

    "Minho I--," "I'm sorry I came here and ruined your day," Minho cut in coolly, surprised when his voice came out steady. He didn't feel steady at all. "If you don't mind, I'll leave first." Jonghyun jerked his hand back when he felt the elevator doors closing. He looked close to tears, and Minho told himself it was for the best. Jonghyun had SeKyung to make him feel better now, after all.

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Minho was getting better. He could finally taste food again, and that warm feeling when he watched children playing football had returned. He was looking for a job, and he was in general beginning to get better. Until Sekyung paid him a visit.

He came back from job-hunting and she was sitting there on the couch. Her eyes were rimmed in red, and she was wearing black. Like she'd just come from a funeral, and Minho had a sinking feeling in his stomach. Please no.. he begged in his head, but the way SeKyung looked was telling him that denial was useless.

    "Minho... here. He left this for you," she handed him an envelope and started to cry. She left quickly, though Minho didn't know if it was out of embarrassment or sadness. He opened the letter with shaking hands.

'Minho

An apology will never be enough to make it right. Still, I'm sorry. Don't blame her, it was all me. I was being stupid, and I wanted to know what it was like to have with a girl, and she was willing. I don't want to hurt you, Minho, but after that night you punched me... I was so messed up. I cried for months, and I beat myself up constantly. She was there for me, even though I never touched her again. We were just friends after that, I swear. But SeKyung was never you, and I just couldn't handle it anymore.

It's morbid, and probably asking too much of you, but I'd like you to keep my ashes. If you don't want to I'd understand, though.

I love you. I always have and I always will.

Love,
Jonghyun'

He stared at the simple letter blankly. His head refused to wrap around the fact that Jonghyun was dead. His cousin came home hours later to find him in the same state. He was still sitting there, staring into space. She choked back a sob when she picked the discarded letter and read it. She looked around and saw the urn on the coffee table in front of Minho. She wondered if Minho was even really seeing it in front of him.

Minho woke up the next day on the couch. He looked over and his eyes landed on the urn in front of him. His eyes took in the letters saying 'Kim Jonghyun' at the bottom, and he started crying as reality sank in. Jonghyun really was dead. He wasn't coming back. It hadn't been some terrible dream.

He didn't know how much time passed after that. He spent his days, weeks, months (?) in a daze. He slept little, and ate even less. Somewhere in the back of his mind, he knew he probably looked like a walking skeleton, and that he should take better care of himself. But he was grieving. He felt guilty that he'd never given Jonghyun a chance to explain. The guilt gave rise to the idea that it was essentially his fault that Jonghyun had died.

He was the one who should've died, not Jonghyun. He was the one in the wrong. He began to hate himself. He started to wonder if it wouldn't be better if he was dead too.
The first cuts he made on his wrists stung. They burned, they made him feel. He could almost hear Jonghyun's voice telling him that the deeper he went, the better off he'd be. So he did. The knife dug deeper and he gasped. The blood started pouring freely and he could finally feel again.

He knew that in all likelihood he wouldn't live beyond that day, so he scrawled a message to his cousin as best he could before he felt his consciousness slip.

'Bury me with his ashes.'

His cousin screamed when she saw Minho's body. And even though she understood, even though she'd been there before... It didn't stop her from feeling guilt and anger directed at herself.

SeKyung was at the funeral sobbing her heart out and apologizing for everything she'd ever done wrong.

Minho's cousin, though she understood from the letter that SeKyung wasn't at fault, couldn't help being angry with her. SeKyung shouldn't even be at Minho's funeral. At least, that was the way she felt. She dealt with it the only way she knew how, even though she knew it wasn't healthy. Minho had been the only family she had left.

She was at an AA meeting a year later after being warned that if she didn't stop drinking, she would be dead within the next 5 years. But she could handle it. Really.
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Aaand that's pretty much it for the oneshots with happy endings. :D The rest of my old oneshots are either PWP or horror or angst through and through.

Well, I hope you enjoyed. c:

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Til next time, loves. ^o~