Jonghyun hated Valentine's Day. He absolutely detested it because.. Well. It was the perfect time to play a joke on dorks. Such as himself. It was almost unbelievably painful when, each year, his classmates left him a "gift".  Sometimes, it was only a card with a mean message. Other times, it was a box of chocolates that had a surprising, nasty center. And sometimes, they'd feel REALLY cruel and make it all seem real. The last kid who had pretended to be interested in him still sometimes smirked at him in the hall. But really, the one person Jonghyun hated more than anyone was Kim Kibum. Kibum had pursued him for months, working hard to make his affection seem real.

And after 5 months, he had. He suceeded in making Jonghyun believe that everything was real. They started dating and Jonghyun was happier than he'd ever been at school. But after a couple of months, Kibum asked Jonghyun to meet him in the parking lot.  That in itself wasn't unusual, but the way Kibum had looked at him.. He had a suspiciously gleeful expression and Jonghyun started to wonder if something was wrong. He started going through his memories of Kibum, but couldn't find any one incident to confirm or deny his fears. He shrugged it off and went to the parking lot. 

When Jonghyun noticed the crowd of people in the parking lot, he had to force himself not to cry. He knew now that his fear had been justified. Kibum stood in the middle of the crowd, smirking maliciously. Without waiting for Jonghyun to reach him, Kibum started publicly ridiculing Jonghyun for ever believing someone would ever be attracted to him.    

  "You're nothing but a freaky . And an idiot too, for thinking that anyone could ever like you for real," Kibum sneered mercilessly. Jonghyun couldn't take any more and ran off. He didn't go back to school. He ran all the way home and locked the front door behind him. He slid down the wall and sobbed. He felt like he'd been completely robbed of his will to live. He just couldn't take any more hate for who he was.  After he was through crying, Jonghyun got up and went to the kitchen to grab a knife. 

As if it wasn't bad enough to publicly humiliate Jonghyun, Kibum had chosen Valentine's Day to do it on. He couldn't help thinking about how fitting it was.  Jonghyun chuckled humorlessly and decided that since it was his heart causing all the problems,  cutting his chest apart would take all the pain away. He started carving his chest up and the tears fell again.  He started feeling weak and dizzy. The last thing he saw before his eyes shut for good was his mother unlocking the front door. Then, he heard her start screaming. 

////

Jonghyun was out of school for nearly a month. Everyone wondered what had happened, especially after he'd run off that day.  The day Jonghyun actually returned to school, people crowded around the classroom to get a look. He didn't look a whole lot different, though he seemed to be a bit paler. He seemed... Dead. It was like someone had the life out of him and left nothing but a shell. 

Seeing him that way forced some of Jonghyun's classmates to realize that what they'd done had very badly affected him. A few of them even felt guilty enough to try to make it up to him. One of Kibum's friends willingly left Kibum's clique to try to become Jonghyun's friend. Jonghyun didn't know how to feel when Lee Taemin, one of Kibum's best friends, broke down in tears in front of him, apologizing over and over.

He couldn't understand why. No one could see the scars on his chest. He made sure they wouldn't because it would only give them something else to about.

At first, he ignored Taemin completely. True, Taemin was one of the ones Jonghyun had seen not laughing at his unfortunate Valentine's Day. But that didn't mean Taemin wasn't still pretending. After all, Kibum had promised that he wasn't lying. 

But Kibum didn't have the same hint of... whatever it was that Taemin had. Against his better judgement, Jonghyun cracked under pressure. But once he had, he was glad he had opened up. Taemin was earnest as only the young can be. It made him that much more trustworthy. 

A few months later, Taemin was still there with him (much to his disbelief). He was still Jonghyun's only friend, but that was by choice. Jonghyun refused to let other people near him. Even the people who had since proved themselves to genuinely want to be Jonghyun's friends.  It made Jonghyun ache to be that naturally mistrustful of people's intentions. But he'd learned the hard way. It was better to be safe than sorry. 

Taemin sometimes came over to Jonghyun's house for help with his homework. Jonghyun's mother was ecstatic that Jonghyun had at least one friend, and frequently came in with snacks and drinks.

On one such day, Jonghyun's mother accidentally spilled a drink all over him. Before he even realized what he was doing, Jonghyun was taking his shirt off to change it. He only realized his mistake when he heard a loud gasp from Taemin. He remembered his scars too late and sighed. He hung his head in shame and defeat.   

  "Go on, Taemin. I know you want to take pictures to send to Kibum so you can both have a good laugh at how much you've hurt me." Jonghyun waited to hear the click of the camera on Taemin's phone. When he didn't, he looked up and saw Taemin's eyes full of tears and pain. He stood there, unsure of what to do.    

  "How could you even think I'd do something like that, Jonghyun? I'm not going to hurt you. I'm not Kibum," Jonghyun felt his eyes sting and he let it happen. He cried in front of Taemin, completely convinced that he was for real. He grasped Taemin in a hug and was rewarded with a bright smile. 

And in that moment, Jonghyun felt... okay. For the first time in a long time.

___________________________________________________________________________________________________________

So yeah, I finally updated my chapter and made it all pretty like I usually do. :) Sorry about how ugly it was earlier. *shudder*

For anyone who never read my blog and is subscribed to my stories... My laptop is completely out of commission (the last time I got it fixed, the person who fixed it superglued it shut, like a . -_-;; ), and I have no idea when I'm going to be getting a new one. D: Unfortunately.

I've been getting online with my iPod until I can finally get a new laptop, so... until them lovelies. ^_^

~~

Til next time, loves. ^o~