A 17-year-old, black and blonde-haired girl sat on the red wooden bleachers beside the yellow soccer field. The cold, autumn wind was blowing through her lime green, school sweatshirt and t-shirt–both did little to protect her against the harsh winds. She swore at herself as she brought her knees up to her chest, still shivering violently. The girl placed her chin on her knees, watching as her brother dribbled the soccer ball past three defenders and ultimately scoring a goal. The boy was only 10 years of age but with the help of two special people, he excelled in all sports he played. One of those two was his sister, Ali, the girl freezing in the Oklahoman wind at the moment.

              The 5th graders cheered for their star player who had just scored their winning goal. Failing in their attempt to lift the boy on their shoulders, they settled for patting his back and giving him high-fives. For a second there, Ali thought about a similar scenario two years before. But there was only one person missing, and she was just hoping that he would appear out of nowhere, enveloping her in a warm hug...

 

~~~

 

              "Here, this might help..."

              Ali’s eyes trailed up from the cup of hot chocolate to the person holding it out to her. She was curled up in the older boy’s larger green jacket, leaving him in only his black t-shirt and jeans.

              "Where did you–"

              "Starbucks, down the street," he answered, sitting down next to her, as she took the warm cup into her freezing hands. He glanced at her shivering body with a worried look. "Still cold? Is my jacket not warm enough?"

              Ali shook her head, she couldn't thank him enough for the jacket and the hot chocolate. She looked back at him to notice that he wasn’t shivering. In fact he showed no signs of coldness.

              "Are you sure you don't wanna sit in the car?" The boy asked. The girl took a small sip, watching the clumps of 3rd graders running around the soccer ball.

              "I told you I'm fine, Peniel. Besides, I wanna watch Rick. He would be upset if I suddenly left too," Ali shivered again, pulling her legs even closer if possible. Peniel sighed and shook his head, wrapping his long arms around the smaller girl who didn't hesitate to lean her head against his broad shoulders. The two of them had been best friends since they had been in 3rd grade. Ali was always the quiet one in the class, a person who people usually went to for advice, but that was it. It wasn’t until Peniel moved down South from Chicago, that Ali had found a true friend and a shoulder to lean on.

              Ali turned her head to look at him. "Aren't you cold? You gave me your jacket and you're only wearing a t-shirt..."

              "I'm fine," he chuckled softly, knocking her head with a fist lightly. He smiled at her,  "shouldn't you be more worried about Ali than Peniel here?"

              She shoved him a bit with her shoulder before holding out the cup to him, which he took. Rick scored a goal for the team and the parents cheered, along with Ali and Peniel. The other 3rd graders on the team gave congratulatory pats on Rick’s back, all of them smiling in victory.

              "My brother-in-law is a pretty good soccer player," Peniel chuckled and Ali shoved him again. He continued, "maybe I should teach him basketball. It might make him taller..."

              “Are you calling my brother short?" Ali scoffed, totally forgetting the fact that her best friend had just called himself her brother’s ‘brother-in-law’. Peniel shrugged, turning back to the game with a small smile on his face.

              After the game, a small black-haired boy, dressed in a navy blue and white soccer uniform, sprinted up to the two best friends with his water bottle in hand.

              “Did you see that goal?!" Rick laughed, jumping up and down.

              “Yes, we did," Ali laughed, crouching down next to her brother and patting his sweaty head, despite the cold.

              “Come on, let's get to the car before your sister becomes a Popsicle," Peniel joked, picking up the 8-year-old boy and placing him on his shoulders, reaching about 6 feet of height.

              The boys started for the car and Ali couldn't help but smile, looking at the back of the two.

              "You coming?" Peniel shouted back at her. She nodded and ran to catch up, wanting to get away from the bitter cold.

 

~~~

 

              But to her disappointment in the present, he never came.

              Ali walked towards her car, parked close by the soccer field. When she placed her hand on the black door handle, the car beeped, telling her that it was now unlocked. After turning on the engine, Ali stepped out again, sitting on the hood of her car as she waited for her little brother.

              The younger boy came minutes later after all his friends had left with their own parents; he had been stalling, he hadn't wanted to go home to that empty house. He ran, sliding into the passenger seat without sparing his older sister a single glance. To this, Ali sighed. He had been like this for about a year and a half now. Or was it two years? It's been quite a long time since the last time she had ridden in this very car with her brother and a certain, special someone. All of them smiling, laughing and playing around.

              "You made a nice goal back there," Ali tried breaking the silence between the two of them, but her brother ignored her, staring blankly out the window at the passing scenery. He refused to talk to her after he had heard about what happened. "Come on, Rick. Please say something..."

              Rick continued to stare out the window, but he said something softly under his breath. Ali had barely caught it, but if the music had been playing she wouldn't have.

              "I want him...where is he?"

              "He won't be coming back, Rick," she sighed. Tears pricked at her eyes, but she had to hold up the strong front for him. Besides, crying on the highway could be a bit dangerous if she couldn't see, right? "Peniel isn't coming back. He left for Korea remember?"

              "I want Dong Geun ge, where is he?" Rick repeated more sternly, this time in Cantonese, their native language.

              Ali stayed silent. Oh, if only he knew how much she wanted Dong Geun home again...

 

~~~

 

              Snow was falling in December. Oklahoma didn't have snow last year so it was comforting in its own way for the Tien siblings.

              Ali was laying down next to Rick on his bed. The 10-year-old boy had finally fallen asleep to his sister's lullabies as she his short-black hair. She was staring out the window, one arm propping her up while the other hand her brother's bangs. Her eyes stared out the frost covered glass panel, watching the snowflakes fall from the sky. Christmas was just two days away now. The two siblings' parents were away on a business trip, promising that they would really try to get home before Christmas Eve at least. Christmas Eve was tomorrow now and she doubted they would be able to make it before Christmas. Their business was international anyway, she understood fully that it would be difficult for them to return home. Just like her parents, her best friend was half the world away also.

 

Peniel. Where are you now? Are you enjoying your life in Korea? Is it snowing there? Do you have any nice friends?

 

              Ali had so many questions swimming around in her head. She hated this feeling. She didn't want it to be so saddening, but what could she do?

              Imagine having a sweet childhood friend. Someone who would dance with you, sing with you, rap with you, study with you, learn languages with you,  play sports with you; do anything and everything with you. And imagine that he was close with your younger brother. So close they could be siblings. Imagine suddenly discovering the butterflies and the clear beats of your heart each time he came close. Then... Then imagine him leaving without telling you a single thing.

              That was what Peniel Shin did. That was what Ali's first love did.

              After making sure Rick was fast asleep, Ali stood up and headed downstairs to get herself something warm to drink, not quite feeling so tired yet. She looked at their half-decorated Christmas tree as she walks around it to reach the kitchen. She sighs. If he were here right now, the tree would have been decorated a long time ago. He would have been able to lift Rick to place the star on the very top of the tree. Ali had always seemed too short for that.

              After pouring some milk in the pot, she turns on the stove to warm it up. She walks around the kitchen to grab all that she needs. The hot chocolate mix, marshmallows, the cup, and a spoon. Ali makes her hot chocolate and washes the pot before she walks over to the fire place, sitting with her feet propped up on the black granite edge in front of the fire.

              The fire warms her bare, cold feet as she drinks up her hot chocolate. Soon after finishing the chocolate, Ali's eyes begin to droop and soon, she finds herself being "Alice" in a winter wonderland. The cup of hot chocolate forgotten on the coffee table.

 

~~~

 

              A few minutes later, Ali's eyes fluttered open. She continued to stare dazedly at the flickering fireplace in front of her, she hadn’t even realized that the door alarm had sounded.

              She stood up to go wash her cup. Her eyes were closed when she turned around and ran into someone's chest.

              "Sorry..." Ali muttered, but when she looked up, she found herself face-to-face with a person she hadn’t seen in a long, long time.

 

Is this a dream...?

 

              "Peniel..." She whispered his name. The black-haired boy gave his friendly smile, both of his larger hands held onto Ali's smaller arms.

              "Hey, careful," he said worriedly. "Don't want you falling on your face with that full cup of hot coffee."

              "Huh?" Ali looked down in confusion and sure enough there was a steaming cup of the blackish liquid–just the way she liked it—where her hot chocolate was before.

              "Let's go get some ice cream," he smiled at her. "We can catch up over some tea."

              "What?"

              "Come on," Peniel took her hand, pulling her outside and into her own car. Ali listened to him talk about Korea, but none of the words he said registered in her mind. She was too happy to see that he was home and with her right now. The two arrived at a nearby, local ice cream shop named Gelato.  They chose their ice creams, smiles lighting up their faces; they were two friends who hadn't seen each other in so long.  "I've missed you so much," he said after they settled down at one of the small metal tables that looked like they were meant for an outside patio.

              "I've missed you a lot too..." She answered, blushing a little. Not wanting to say anything more, she took a bite of her strawberry-pink  ice cream. Something strange happened, the taste in ...it wasn't strawberry, but it was actually the taste of a coffee blend. It wasn't cold, like ice cream was supposed to be, but it was warm like actually coffee.  Ali shrugged, pushing the thought aside.

              "You've got some ice cream right there," Peniel laughed, tapping the side of his lips. She lifted her thumb to wipe it off when he grabbed her hand. The dancer laughed, "that's unsanitary, let me get it."

 

Since when did he start using the word "unsanitary"?

 

              Before Ali could think about it any more, Dong Geun had leaned over the small table and placed his lips on the side of . Frozen in shock, the Chinese girl's eyes were opened in surprise. The older boy's tongue lapped up the melted, pinkish substance on the corner of her lips before he pulled away.

              "There," he chuckled when he noticed her flushed face after he pulled away. "Cute."

              Ali fixed her black and blonde hair so that all of it lay over her left shoulder. That was when she glanced out the window and noticed a huge difference in the weather.

 

Wasn't it snowing earlier? Where's all the snow?

 

              It wasn’t snowing outside anymore. In fact, the piles of snow had disappeared and in it’s place was pounding rain. Ali’s eyes watched the rain hitting the ground in confusion. The pitter patter of the wet droplets began to lull her to sleep.

              “We should get home, you parents might be wondering where you are,” Peniel stood up, snapping her out of her drowsy reverie. Before she could say anything about her parents being on the other side of the world, he started for the door, so Ali had no choice but to get up and followed him. When they stepped out the door, a double beep sounded and the scenery changed. They were standing on her house’s front steps now. “Well, here we are...”

              The background of the scene changed and all of sudden, the freezing, white stones of her front steps faded into warm brown, hardwood flooring. The warmth of the fireplace behind Ali replaced the cold wind from the outdoors. She was now standing with Peniel in front of the flickering fireplace, holding an empty cup somewhat like the first time she saw him a few hours ago. But...was it really a few hours ago?

              A mischievous grin marked her best friend’s face. His lips moved, but Ali couldn’t here anything he said. Then, out of nowhere, a dizzy feeling hit her, causing her to stumble whilst fluttering her heavy eyelids.

              “I suddenly....why do I feel so tired...?” Ali rubbed her eyes slowly falling forward without her feeling it. In the next moment, she found herself enveloped in strong, long arms of her best friend. 

              “Hey, hey... careful. Why don’t I carry you upstairs? Hmm..” Ali’s eyes closed began to close as she heard his soft voice.

              “You better be...there...when I...wake...up... Promise me...” Ali’s sentences broke apart as she spoke now, her eyes began to close up. Before they did so, she reached her hand up to brush against Peniel’s cheek as if to reassure herself that he was real, but her fingers came in contact with nothing. The reddish lights of the fire reflected off of the boy’s skin, making it a warm, pale color. 

              “I promise,” he whispered, his voice resounded in the comforting darkness of her closed eyelids.

 

~~~

 

              The next time Ali woke up, she found herself in the warmth of her own bed sheets. She couldn’t exactly remember what she had dreamt about, but something that happened made her giddy. She could remember faded, tiny details. Coffee. Ice cream. An unexpected kiss. Most importantly, she remembered seeing her best friend. 

              “When did I move upstairs?” she whispered to herself, when she sat up. She looked over to the clock.  05:45 it read. Ali shook her head and tried to go back to sleep. It was too early in the morning for anything. But no matter what she did, she couldn’t go back to sleep. She tried putting on some classical music in her Ipod dock, she also tried counting to a hundred with her eyes closed, but nothing helped. No matter what she did, she couldn’t go back to sleep. Whatever she had dreamt about wouldn’t let her sleep again, even though she couldn’t remember exactly what it was. 

              “Maybe I should go check up on Rick,” she suggested to herself. Ali slipped out of bed, making her way across the hallway to her brother’s room. She pushed the door open slowly, as to not make a sound. When she opened the door enough for her to step in, she noticed that his bed was empty due to the glowing nightlight beside his bed. The moonlight shone through his window, the curtains had been pulled aside.

              Ali slowly walked towards the window to find an unfamiliar car parked out front, snow was piled up on the vehicle so she could tell that it had been there for a while now. The smell of chocolate reached her nose; someone was making hot chocolate downstairs. In her curiosity, she began her journey downstairs to see what was going on.

              When her bare feet touched the cold floors of the 1st floor, she heard Rick’s happy voice. A tone of the little boy’s voice she hadn’t heard in two years.

              “Thanks!” Ali could almost hear the grin on the 10-year-old’s face. Not wanting to be noticed just yet, Ali tiptoed around their half-lit Christmas tree towards the opening to the kitchen. “You know, Ali’s gonna be real excited to see you too!”

              “Really now?” a man’s voice chuckled. The voice was somewhat familiar, but Ali still couldn’t quite distinguish who it was. It was most definitely not her father’s though, so who could it be?
              When Ali turned the corner, her eyes widened in surprise at the person standing there. The man standing there was still wearing a black, North Face sweatshirt. His black hair was a little shorter than she remembered and his bangs were swept to one side. His cordial, black eyes were looking at the small 10-year-old at his side. Rick was holding a steaming red cup in his small hands, smiling up at the man who had made him that warm drink. 

              Neither boys had seen her yet, since both of them were engrossed in their own friendly conversation. It wasn’t until she was standing a few feet in front of them did the man look up and lock his eyes with hers. His black eyes sparkled with it’s natural mischievous glow, just the way Ali had always remembered it as. When their eyes met,his grin widened into a full out smile.

              “Haven’t changed much I see,” he gave her a light laugh, one which made Ali’s heart skip a beat. “As beautiful as always, my little songbird.”

              That was when Ali knew this was really real.

              “I told you he’d be back!” Rick turned around, a big smile on his chubby cheeks. “I told you! I told you!! I told you!!!”

              Peniel’s large hand ruffled Rick’s black hair as he placed his own steaming mug on the counter and walked around the little boy to Ali. Something warm rolled down her cheek and it wasn’t until her best friend’s thumb was wiping it away did she notice that she was crying. 

              “Hey, don’t cry,” he whispered, his other hand came up to cradle her face. She leaned into his touch, liking the warmth his large hands brought to her usually cold skin. His lips kissed away the salty droplets rolling down her face.

              “Where...where have you been?” Ali brought a hand to cradle Dong Geun’s hand in her own. In the next moment, she found herself crying into his shoulder, his arms wrapped around her. “I’ve missed you so much....for so long...”

              “Hey, hey...I moved to Seoul because of my father’s job,” he explained hastily. “And I lost my phone on the trip there. My dad gave me a lot of work to do, so I couldn’t even get a new phone or call you.” Ali finally pulled away from his shoulder, rubbing her eyes like a child. When Peniel saw this, he slowed down a bit, his voice softened in tone, “but I’m back now. That must count for something right?”

              “Jie jie, Dong Geun ge said he’ll be back for–” the rest of Ali’s little brother’s statement was muffled by Peniel’s hand.

              “Hey Buddy, don’t go blurting it out just yet! One more day, alright?” he laughed. Rick’s face fell, but when Peniel removed his hand, his smile was just where it should’ve been.

              “Promise!” The little boy grinned.

              “How about you go wash up and we’ll go out for breakfast at Jimmy’s Eggs?” Peniel suggested, bribing the young boy with his favorite breakfast place. At that, the 10-year-old nodded vigorously a wide smile marking his face. A second later, he was gone and his feet pounding up the stairs could be heard. Peniel laughed, turning back to the pot that had been warming up the milk and taking it to the sink.

              “What was he talking about?” Ali asked, grabbing the sponge from the sink and taking the pot from her best friend. 

              “Oh...uhm...noth–it’s a secret...” Peniel’s cheeks flushed a slight pink, turning his head away from her. Ali let out a small giggle, never before had she seen him stumble for words. He looked back at her when she giggled and he couldn’t help but smile. “You should probably go change. I’ll be waiting for you two outside.”

              “Whatever you say, boss,” Ali joked, taking her bubble-encased finger and swiping it across his cheek. “Oh, and you might wanna wash that off too.”

              The two stared at each other for a few moments before both of them burst out into laughter. Dong Geun wiped the bubbles off of his face with the back of his hand while Ali rinsed the soap off of the pot. 

              “Alright, I’ll see you in a few,” she smiled, giving Peniel a pat on the shoulder before walking up the stairs to her room. He stared after her, a grin lingered on his lips before he walked back out the door to start his car.

 

I’ve missed seeing that beautiful smile of yours...

 

~~~

 

              “Hey Al, c’mere!” Peniel waved Ali over with his free hand. The black-haired boy was sitting cross-legged under the Christmas tree, now all wonderfully lit up with lights and ornaments with the help of Peniel. In his lap was his guitar, which he had brought in after the three of them had eaten breakfast. His fingers lightly strummed the seven strings as Rick sat beside him, watching him.

              “Jie jie! He said he has something to show you!!” Rick cupped his hands around his mouth while yelling for his sister. Ali called back from the kitchen, but neither boy could comprehend what she had said. 

              Both boys look at each other and shrugged. Suddenly a wide smirk spreads across Rick’s lips.

              “Why the sudden smile, buddy?” Peniel chuckled at the boy’s change in attitude.

              “Do you love my Jie jie?” Rick whispered, catching the 19-year-old off guard. His smirk grew, “cause I totally approve.”

              “Wh-what? Why would you think that??” A little shocked at the small boy’s question, Peniel ends up plucking an off-tune note in the small Christmas tune he was playing. His fingers stop moving as he stares in shock at the little boy. It doesn’t even cross his mind to ask where the kid had learned the word “approve.”

              By now, Rick was laughing incredibly hard, holding his stomach while yelling out “I knew it!” over and over again. Peniel is left staring at the 10-year-old boy rolling on the ground, laughing his heart out.

              “What’s wrong with you, huh?” Ali walks over, poking her little brother’s ticklish spot with her foot while holding three cups of hot chocolate. “Come on, sit up. If you aren’t gonna sit up, you don’t get your chocolate with extra whipped cream and extra chocolate!” she sang and almost immediately did Rick sit back up. 

              “Ma coco!!!!” He cried, grabbing at the steaming mugs his sister held. The two older ones laughed their hearts out at the younger boy’s reactions, giving him his cup.

              “So what was it that you wanted to show me?” Ali asked as she sat down beside her best friend. Peniel took a sip out of the cup he was given before placing it beside the colorfully wrapped presents on the floor. 

              “Do you remember when I promised you that I’d write a song for you?” Ali was sipping at her own cup of chocolate so she missed the light red on her best friend’s face as he spoke.

              “Hmm?”

              “Well, while I was in Korea...a few friends of mine helped me compose this song for you...”

              “Really?” Ali finally looked up with a smile that took his breath away. He reached his hand over to swipe the whipped cream off the top of her lips with his thumb. 

              He chuckled, bringing his thumb to his lips, “really.”

              Ali flushed a bright pink and Peniel couldn’t help but smile even more, now knowing the effect that he had on her. Rick, who sat with them in a triangle, nudged Peniel with his foot as if to urge him to go on. Peniel clucked his tongue at the boy as if to tell him not to rush him.

              He began to strum the strings of his guitar lightly, taking a deep breath to calm himself before he began to sing.

 

~Baby, listen carefully to this promise I made for you.~

~If you want, I can do anything.~

 

 

              Rick began clapping his hands together lightly as if to accompany him in a soft beat. Ali’s eyes were glued onto her best friend whose eyes were closed while he continued to sing to her passionately.

 

~You are dazzling and you’re just my style, my beautiful girl.~

~When you’re coming toward me, just stop right there.~

 

 

              Ali blushed an even brighter red that could’ve compared to Rudolph’s nose.

 

~I fall in love with you just like that.~

~Do you know my heart? I really like you.~

 

 

              Peniel opened his eyes to look at Ali, his eyes sparkling with passion and love. His eyes were looking their utmost serious as he sang to her.

 

~My sweety girl. You’re my heart. You’re my girl.~

~I’m only looking at you, do you know my heart, my girl?~

~You’re my angel – even if time stops, even if I can’t see you.~

~You’re my only. My girl.~

 

 

              The pace of his strumming quickened as he sang with more emotion than before. Ali hadn’t noticed the tears that came to her eyes until Rick stood up, and wrapped his arms around his sister’s neck. 

 

~I’m not just saying this, please believe me.~
~I’ll protect you with everything I’ve got.~

 

              “Don’t cry. Dong Geun ge  really means it,” he whispered to his sister. “He swore it to me!”

 

~You’re my angel. You’re my sweety.~
~Do you know my heart, my girl?~
~You’re my angel. You’re my sweety~
~It’s always you alone.~

~

~My one and only, my girl.~

 

              Peniel finished the song minutes later, his eyes never tore themselves away from Ali’s. A few moments of silence harmonized with the last lingering note from Peniel’s song.

              “So...?” He bit his lip nervously, awaiting her answer to his true confession. “Would you like to.... Do you wanna...”

              “What he’s trying to say is: ‘will you be my girl?’,” Rick rolls his eyes, throwing it out for the two of them. 

              “Yeah....So what do you say? Will you be my girl?” Peniel finally finds the courage to spit it out once Rick has already done so. 

              “I–”

              “Would love to!!!” Rick interrupts his sister, earning a light punch in his shoulder.

              “Shut up, you little–”

              “Angel,” Rick sings before running off so that his sister nor Peniel can reach him.

              “Will you accept my confession, Alison?” Peniel asks sincerely this time, taking her hand in his. His thumb runs over the top of her tanned hand. And Ali blushes just a shade deeper.

              “Oh, just say yes already!!” Rick yells from his spot behind the wall.

              “Yeah...” Ali whispers this time, trying to ignore her younger brother. She turns her head away, in attempt to hide her embarrassed face. 

              “Hey, hey...” Peniel reaches his arm over, moving her to face him. “No need to feel embarrassed...”

              He plants a light kiss on her forehead before pulling away. He smiles gently at her, but no sooner does he pull away does she place an arm around his neck.

              “You missed,” she giggles, pulling him in for a kiss on the lips. Both of them smile into the kiss, but the sweetness of the moment is broken only a second later when they hear the click of camera lens. The two of them pull away to see Rick holding Ali’s Canon camera to his face. He takes it down.

              “Ah, Mom and Dad will love this! I should ask for a camera next Christmas. My picture-taking skills aren’t all that bad...” Rick grins mischievously at the two older kids who are now blushing madly. 

              A few seconds later, the green watch on Rick’s wrist beeps with an alarm and the 10-year-old brings his wrist up to turn it off. His grin widens out into a full out smile when he sees the time. 

              “It’s Christmas now, Dong Geun ge. Can we tell her now? Please, please, please!” Rick places his palms together, getting on his knees to beg.

              “What is he talking about?” Ali giggles, while Peniel entwines their fingers together.

              “Well...do you wanna know what my Christmas gift is to you? I’m sure you’ll love it,” he whispers in her ear. He plants a kiss on her temple before pulling away to look into her eyes, his own eyes twinkling with a mischievous glint. “I’ll be flying back to Korea after the New Years...”

              Ali finds herself frowning, “how in the world is that a Christmas gift I’m supposed to love?” 

              “Wait, there’s more!” Rick jumps up from his position on his knees, sounding like a commercial salesman. 

              “I’ll pack my things over there and I’ll be flying back over to stay for good,” Peniel chuckles with amusement. “and that is a promise I will seal with a–”

Kiss...

 

~~~

 

Dear you,

 

       Christmas is just around the corner now! Rick and I...are so happy to have Peniel back in our lives. I couldn’t have wished for anything better than this. Hopefully, you enjoyed our Christmas tale; I wish for yours to be just as miraculous! This year, God’s Christmas present to us was the best. Merry Christmas everyone! I hope you have a joyous one!

 

Love,

Alison Tien