C

C

F

D

C

D

He looked at the slip of paper seemingly deadpanned; not cracking a single smile, no flashes of anger in his eyes and not a single word was said. Then he looked upwards, only his eyes moving, and no other muscle, and So HanYoung knew she was in for it.

“So HanYoung,” he said evenly. “What is this?”

“That?” she smiled innocently, hoping to gain some leniency. “That’s my recent report card. My teacher wants you to sign it. Hee.”

“SIGN IT!?!” So YiJeong finally leapt out of his seat and roared, back to his usual rage-y self. His wife simply sat next to him, enjoying her freshly brewed mug of Earl Grey. She revelled in the way the steam swept along her cheeks and the way its smell permeated the air around her, the distinct smell of citrus that would sometimes pass off as that of lavender. As she held the mug in both hands, warmth travelled to her palms, a welcome sensation in the dead of winter. She sipped her full-bodied tea, enjoying its richness.

“SIGN IT MY FOOT! WHAT IS THIS SO HANYOUNG? C? D? AND EVEN AN F?!” So YiJeong screamed, waving the offensive slip of paper in his daughter’s face. So HanYoung merely flinched. Then So YiJeong slammed the piece of paper on the table and slapped it a few more times for good measure.

“So HanYoung, if you were a little slow, I would understand. If you were last in class in the best class in school, I would still be okay with that. If you had tried your best, I would have understood. BUT WHAT IS THIS? YOU GET ALL THE As IN JUNIOR YEAR AND NOW YOU GIVE ME THIS IN SENIOR YEAR?! AND, AND, WHAT IS THIS? YOU GET AN F IN ARTS?! HOW CAN YOU GET AN F IN ARTS WHEN YOUR DAD IS THE FRIGGING FAMOUS POTTER THAT EVERYONE IN SOUTH KOREA RECOGNISES?!”

“AH WHAT’S SO IMPORTANT ABOUT ALL THAT STUPID MATH AND KOREAN?!” HanYoung fired back. “Who’s gonna use matrix or geometry, all that stupid el-en and isosceles, equilateral, bilateral. Who does that these days? Now we all just throw that data into the computer and the answer comes out! And pottery is not the only art in the world!”

So YiJeong pinched the bridge of his nose in exasperation.

“El-en, el-en…” he muttered, pointing a shaking finger at the rebellious brat. “EL-EN YOUR HEAD! THAT’S NATURAL LOGARITHM TO YOU!”

“Ah, so that’s what it was?” HanYoung muttered to herself.

“YAH! SO HANYOUNG!”

“WHAT?!”

Chu GaEul put a reassuring hand on her agitated husband’s arm.

“Alright, alright, okay,” So YiJeong breathed, putting a hand to his forehead. “Yes, of course you don’t need to have spectacular grades to succeed in life, but you will then need to be an expert at something else because if you choose that difficult path, being average won’t let you live a good life… SO HANYOUNG WHAT IS WITH YOUR RECENT POTTERY PIECES?!”

GaEul rolled her eyes. He was back to being an emotion-filled bomb again.

“WHAT? WHAT?” her disagreeable daughter retorted.

“YESTERDAY’S PIECE! WHAT IS THAT SAD HORRIBLE THING?! THERE’S NO CONTROL, THE EDGES AREN’T SMOOTH AND, WHAT THE HELL, WHEN YOU BAKED IT YOU DIDN’T EVEN SET THE RIGHT TEMPERATURE!”

“Not everyone wants to become a potter like you okay?” she scoffed.

“Then what do you want to do? Huh? Huh? You little twerp,” he barked, rapping on the report card and pointing towards a pottery piece placed on the kitchen countertop as GaEul eyed him. “You can’t, no, you won’t, get those grades, and you won’t do pottery properly and you muck around the whole day, hugging that stupid poster of that stupid monkey-”

“DON’T INSULT MY MASON OPPA!”

“MASON OP- HA! MASON OPPA! OH RIGHT! HE’S THE CAUSE OF ALL THIS STUPIDITY! AFTER YOU SOMEHOW SAW THAT MONKEY WALKING DOWN THE STREET YOU WENT COMPLETELY SENILE AND THIS HAPPENS!”

“DON’T. INSULT. OPPA!”

“THAT STUPID MONKEY! SOMEONE OUTTA SHAVE HIS HEAD AND THROW HIM IN THE ARMY!”

“I SAID DON’T INSULT MASON OPPA!”

“GaEul! GaEul, look at your daughter!” YiJeong pointed an exasperated finger at the girl.

“My daughter?” GaEul finally spoke, lifting her head from her now half-empty mug of tea. “Half of her also came from you.”

“Don’t insult Mason oppa. He will become your son-in-law,” So HanYoung stated. “In the future, I will marry him, that’s what I will do.”

So YiJeong gaped at his delusional daughter. Chu GaEul stared at her.

“Yah, I think I have to cut all your hair for you to get it. COME HERE! WHERE’S THE SCISSORS?!” So YiJeong spat, grabbing for his daughter and searching around for a pair of scissors.

“APPA!”

“They’re in the kitchen aren’t they, those scissors? Yah, So HanYoung, you really asked for it now. Yah, So HanYoung, you- really- you-”
They chased each other round and round the dining table as GaEul just looked on.

“EOMMA!” HanYoung protested.

GaEul merely lifted an eyebrow and shot her daughter a look that said: you asked for it.

At this point, the So’s other child, HyungWoo stepped into the dining room, having just returned from school. The family’s chauffer arrived with him and placed the family’s sole son’s bag on a chair before retreating. HyungWoo raised a questioning eyebrow directed at his mother and with just one look at her face, he understood. Just the usual.

“Marry him, huh, marry that idiot Mason Moon? How are you supposed to marry someone who doesn’t even know you, huh? How are you supposed to marry someone who’s had the same girlfriend since he was five, huh? How are you supposed to marry someone you only see on television and in magazines, huh?!”

“I will break them up and Mason oppa will see that I’m his one true love!”

“YAAAAAAAAH! WHERE ARE THOSE BLASTED SCISSORS?”

HyungWoo glanced at the disturbing report card lying lamely on the table and he chuckled.

“Hahaha! Stupid!” he laughed, pointing a mocking finger at his older sister.

“Yaaaaah!!!” HanYoung screamed and launched herself at him.

“So HyungWoo, you better not laugh. If you come back with that kind of results, I swear I will shave every single strand of hair on your body and deport you to the army.” So YiJeong fumed as he ruffled through the kitchenware in the kitchen drawer. “If you go around kissing those posters of SNSD like that crazy thing over there, I swear I will-”

“Oh Em Gee, Appa, SNSD is so old! Yuck! YAH YOU CRAZY WOMAN GET OFF ME! AND I GOT MY REPORT CARD BACK! I GOT 5 As AND ONE B OKAY! EOMMA!”

“ENOUGH!” GaEul finally yelled. The strain on irritated her. “So HanYoung, sit down. So HyungWoo, well done my darling,” she smiled warmly at her son and shot a stern look at her daughter. “And So YiJeong you better get yourself right here. If you cut off all of our daughter’s hair, I will shave yours too.”

“GaEul!”

“Just kidding darling, but come here,” GaEul instructed.

Like obedient little dogs, they followed her every order.

GaEul slowly put her mug down and calmly picked up the report card.

“So HanYoung, class 3E, the second last class, in senior year and getting, let’s see, 3Cs, 2Ds and an F in arts.” She calmly read out. So YiJeong harrumphed.

“So HanYoung,” GaEul looked straight into her daughter’s eyes. “From this moment on, you are grounded. Also, there will be a stop to your allowance-”

“WHAT?!”

“AND,” GaEul continued. “No television, no internet, no new magazines. You will only be allowed to travel between school and home, escorted, now, by our chauffer.”

“Eomma, that’s not fair!”

“Not fair?” GaEul bit back, “I haven’t even finished. I will also confiscate anything that has to do with Mason Moon from your room-”

“EOMMA!”

“AND THIS WILL CONTINUE,” GaEul hissed, “until you get a report card showing straight As.”

“WHAT?!” HanYoung and HyungWoo exclaimed.

Even HyungWoo was shocked by the harshness of the punishment. So YiJeong merely smirked.

“If you can’t get that Mason Moon out of your head, I will forcefully rip him from your brains,” GaEul spat. “If you come back with another one like this, and your father threatens to chop off all your hair, I’m not stopping him. And no, you will not be home schooled or exempted from school if that happens.”

“Eomma!” HanYoung protested. “That’s just unfair! You can’t do this to me!”

“Too bad,” GaEul shrugged. “My house, my rules, whatever I say goes. You better go back to studying if you want all your Mason Moon posters back by the end of next semester. By the way I’ve already asked MinHa eonnie to remove all of them, so, you can return to your clean Mason-free room now.”

YiJeong raised an eyebrow at his fierce wife, surprised at her swift actions.

“MOTHER, I HATE YOU!” HanYoung screamed as she marched back to her room all huffy. And then a slam was heard and all was quiet.


“Hmm, our HyungWoo,” GaEul smiled. “Come here darling.”

GaEul opened her arms and welcomed her precious boy with an embrace as he produced a satisfactory report card for her to see. YiJeong affectionately ruffled his son’s hair as GaEul linked arms with him, resting her head on his shoulder while she examined the report card.

Suddenly she sat straight up.

“HyungWoo, you got a B for Korean?” she demanded.

“What? That’s good! See, at least he got an A for arts, unlike someone else,” YiJeong retorted.

“HyungWoo yah, your mom’s a Korean teacher!” GaEul sighed.

“And… then…?” HyungWoo asked. “Hey I’m half Appa and half you. But I didn’t get your half regarding linguistics! I think I got Appa’s half.”

“Hey! What’s that supposed to mean?” YiJeong retorted.

GaEul glanced at him then asked: “Do you think JunPyo’s lack of linguistic skills is contagious?”

“YAH!”

GaEul broke into laughter as did her husband and son.

“C’mon kiddo, let’s go get some ice cream,” YiJeong said as he took hold of HyungWoo’s hand and fished his pockets for his car keys.
 

Thanks to Yue (of SoEul Scribblers), for giving an insight to fangirlism (no, she was not the HanYoung/ShiWon kind of fangirl) and of course Reply 1997 (I am waiting for 1994. Hee!!! It's gonna be epic!) and to that article about Mason Moon having a girlfriend at all his 5 years of age.

To Mason Moon, no offence, this is just a story. I only used you because you're the only kid idol that I know now. By the time this story takes place, you should have grown so much, into a teenaged ladykiller. Have fun with your girlfriend for now!