Okay i didn't realize it's short until i read it again -_-

so PLEASE FORGIVE ME if you're disappointed with this story TT__TT

please don't be mad at meeeeeeeehhh TT__TT

*chewing fireballs along with the poor OC*

ah, i didn't give her a name, kekeke.

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There are still many words I can't say..

There's still love remaining in my heart which i can't give..

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Oppa.

Should I call you that?

I hate that word actually. It sounds so clingy and flirty, it makes me feels like a spoiled girl. No, I really hate that word. I’m fine with ‘eonni’, but with ‘oppa’, I don’t think so.

But they told me to call you ‘oppa’.

No, not because we’re in love and we’re dating and I need to call you ‘oppa’ in such a very flirty way. It’s because they told it’s the appropriate way to call you.

What were they talking about?

What happened to us?

We were so in love with each other.

I still remembered that day when you came into my class with those entire pretty boy look and the girls would fly like a bee finding its honey. You’re so tall, your hair was light brown, your nose has always been sharp, and your gaze has been always fierce. You’re four years older than us – five for me actually, since I was born one year later than my friends. You said your name is Wu Yifan, and we should call you Mr. Wu. But then you told me secretly that I could call you Yifan whenever the students aren’t around. And instead of getting my sanity works, I nodded lightly and said that you could call me by my front name too.

Darn, I should’ve known better.

I should’ve known better that things aren’t as easy as it seems. I should’ve known better when you told me you’ve been living with only your mom who unfortunately passed away about three years ago. I should’ve known better too when I told you I’m the only child of my father, and I lived without remembering my mother’s warmth and face. I should’ve known better either when one day you said that we already understand each other and we should date.

We dated. And it was the most exciting thing that ever happened to me. Not because I’m dating you – well it’s one of the reasons too, but mostly it’s about how thrilling it feels when we kept our relationship as a secret. Stolen glances, shy smiles, secret meetings at the abandoned storeroom. It’s such a drama if I thought about that again. It was sweet. I hate sweet things, actually – except for food. But somehow, I can’t hate it anymore since I felt it with you.

I learnt everything about you. The color of your eyes that somehow resembles mine, those thick eyebrows that would furrows easily, your slender fingers that supposed to be delicate but clumsy at the fact, how your nose would scrunch everytime you laughed. I came to know that I needed those broad shoulders you’d lend me everytime I cry, those warm hugs that surrounds me everytime I’m happy or sad, that soft voice you’d use everytime you wanted to calm me down, and simply, I needed you.

My bestfriends found out about our relationship. And being a mature one, Jinri told me that I shouldn’t have accepted you, because we had a huge gap of age. Jongin, in the other hand, keep shoving me with evil smiles and encouraging words about us. But then Sehun came, she said that I’m too young for you, she said that she couldn’t guarantee if you’re being serious with me. And then Soojung came too, he said that I should trust my heart, I should keep the ‘heart over logic’ motto.

That’s why I love my bestfriends, they’re just too cute when they’re being gathered together.

However, two years has passed. I already spent a year in college, you’ve left the teacher job and took the place as a CEO at a big company. And things are getting more better and mature. We met each other freely, held each other’s hands as if it’s the most natural thing in this world. I could tell that it’s a slap in the face for those who doubted our relationship. Even Jinri and Sehun cheered happily on our second anniversary, dragging along their lovers, Jongin and Soojung. Yeah, they were just being caring friends to me, and I really appreciated them.

Do you remember our first kiss? That night when we arrived in front of my house, without my dad knowing it – he doesn’t even know we’re dating either – . We kissed, short but sweet, and it was the most beautiful thing I’ve ever felt in my whole life. And I’m so glad to have such a gentleman like you. You said you hated to rush things, and you kept your words. You kissed me for the very first time after two years of cuddling together and stolen pecks on the cheeks. I’m so thankful to have you, Wu Yifan. I’m so thankful to have you as my boyfriend.

So it doesn’t mean that I have to be thankful to have you as my older brother.

It was raining so hard when dad called me to his spacious office room. It was raining harder when he told me to sit next to him and he pulled me into his warm embrace. It was raining harder and harder when he told me what I’ve never know in my life. It was raining so hard outside, or maybe it was just inside my heart that was raining.

He told me my mom didn’t pass away after she gave birth to me as what he has been telling me. He said mom and him were a lover who didn’t get the acceptance from my grandparents, they said mom is not worthy to be their family. Dad decided to run away with mom and lived in a village. One year later she gave birth to a son, and five years later she’s pregnant again. It was the seventh months of her second pregnancy when grandma came to her and said that she should leave dad if she wanted him to have a proper life. Grandma said she could bring one of her children. Mom didn’t tell dad, of course, dad found out after years of wondering and asking. So, another one year later, she left dad, she brought her son with him, leaving dad with the baby girl who was just having her first birthday.

She brought my older brother, she left dad and me.

Dad said my older brother found him around two months ago. Dad said he has been looking for him for four years. But he was surprised that he had a sister. Well, I was surprised too when I found out that I have a brother. I always wanted a brother back then, but I abandoned it when I dated you. I asked Dad when I could meet him and what he looks like. He just smiled and said that it should be a surprise. He didn’t tell me what’s his name. He didn’t tell me where he lived.

He didn’t tell me it’s you.

It makes senses after all. How we got the very same eye color, how we hated the same thing and loved the similar things, how you reminds me so much of dad whenever you’re talking about business, how you reminds me of dad whenever you took care of me. No wonder why I felt so safe with you. It’s a magical thing that siblings had, they said. But I still refused the idea.

The day you stepped into my house is the worst day ever. Weird, I always dreamed about you walking into my house. But I dreamed it to be the moment when you came to my dad and tell him that you loved me and you would like to marry me, which is a silly thing, I know. I dreamed it to be like that. Not like this. I didn’t dream it to be the moment when you came and dad told both of us to meet each other as the reunion of the once broken family.

Turns out that grandpa and grandma are glad to meet you, and they said you could be the heir of the company, considering that you’re smart and thinks like Grandpa. You’re so welcomed by the family. I always wanted them to know you and accept you. I always wanted Dad to be nice to you. But I wanted them to accept you as my boyfriend or my husband-to-be. I wanted Dad to be nice to you because you’re going to become his son-in-law. I never expected them to accept you as their long lost nephew and cousin. I never expected Dad to be nice to you because you’re his long lost son who resembles him so much.

Maybe I was the only one in the family who couldn’t accept you as my long lost brother.

Because what we had wasn’t a sibling love. What we had was a true love between a male and a female. Maybe both of it has the same strength, but it’s totally different. And I still can’t have you as my brother. Not after what we had been through together.

I love you too much that I can’t accept you as my brother.

And you’re not making it easy either. The way you looked at me as if you’re telling me you’re sorry for everything. The way you grabbed my hands secretly whenever everyone isn’t watching, squeezing it into yours as if you won’t let me go forever. And that night, when you secretly came into my bedroom, finding me with eyes still opened.

That very same night, when you climbed onto my bed silently and kissed me in such a deep and passionate way. I could’ve fly to the highest sky, but I already taken deep down to the ground when I realized that you’re kissing me with tears, and somehow the pain in your heart transferred through it, to my heart that has already pained. I was ready to protest as you parted your lips from mine when I looked at your sorrowful stare, when I heard your hoarse voice that stabbed my heart mercilessly.

‘I can’t do this,’ you said.

‘I’m so sorry for being selfish,’ you said.

‘I love you so much,’ you said.

Yifan, please take me out of this reality.

Please take me out.

What happened to us, Yifan?

We were so perfect for each other.

But they keep telling me to call you ‘oppa’.

They keep telling me to call you ‘oppa’ because it’s inappropriate to call you by your name. They keep telling me I should accept you. But what they know? They knew nothing about us. About what we had. About how we cried together for an hour after you kissed me that night. About how I nearly jumped from the window at my bedroom because I just can’t deal with it anymore. About how I needed you so much in my life more than a sister needed her brother.

They knew nothing about how we loved each other so much.

So, I’m asking you once again. You’re the smartass here, so I think you could answer it. You know I can’t think about anything clearly right now.

Oppa.

Should I call you that?

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........

*doing dragon dance along with kris*

THANKS FOR READING!

*hug you tightly and shove your pocket with luhan* ENJOY THE MAYO!! *????????*

anyway, please kindly subscribe or comment or even upvote, though i don't really understand what upvotes are -_-

what's the use of it anyway? it's the upward arrow at the left side of the title, right? O_O