i remembered my first day in my primary school . i was like what is this place ? Horrible ! Sad ! Dirty ! i went to my school with my oppa . oppa said " okay , this is your school . read and learn here . okay ? " i looked at his face with a weird sad face . i thought he'll not going to leave me so soon like that . but it's okay . he's my brother . he will protect me whenever i need him . i knew it . 

" oppa , i told you , do not wear this kind of suit . everybody is looking at you " i gazed him . and quickly wave my hand as a goodbye signal . 

" goodbye . i will give you a ride home later ... after the end of your class .  be cool , i will always be there for you , candy  " he's waving back to me. 

" okayyyyyy byebye " i yelled and ran quickly to my class . what a shame , he called me candy .. in my school , it should only be at our house , only at our house . that's where he could probably called me by that name . 

*tringg tringg* 

here i am , being a 15 years old girl at my beautiful house . i almost forget today was my birthday . my room was all in purplish colour . the cabinet , bed and everything . i woke up every morning with a hope , my only hope or wish . just one wish . 

i woke up from my bed and took my bath . i need to go to school . a middle school . with a lot of friends . studying . nahhh , enjoying . i wore my school uniform which is a purple bow , with a checkered purple skirt and a t-shirt of course . 

i went downstair and straight up to my kitchen to get some of my breakfast . normally , my parents went out for work during this time . a cup of tea and two slices of toasted bread was prepared in a plate on my round table . with a note . " don't be late , be at home by 7 o 'clock . a little surprise for you , candy . " always like that , but it also will ended up with " sorry , we're late . we're going to do it better next year ." and i'll be " okay , it's alright"

i went out to school . one of my friends , Huwaa will wait for me at the gate of school . i don't know why , but she's like my own sister with a same age . a twin maybe . she's very nice and good-looking too . she had a pair of hazel coloured eyes , wavy long hair that was tied into two ponytails . she wore a pair of white frame glasses . she'd a problem with her eyes since she's little . 

" huwaa unnie , you don't have to do this anyway . i felt like i was not really take a good care of myself " i said . without any response , she hugged me . she was so lovely . 

" happy birthday , candy . i hope your only and important wish will come true today " she smiled and hugged me all the way to our classroom . what a mess , but it's okay . 

despite of her hug , i went to my table . and everybody like , " where is your brother ? is he coming today ? where is he now ? i want his signature . can you give this to him , can you give that to him . oh TOP-ssi , oh seunghyun-ssi  " now , i hate my brother so much . a long ago , i loved to get that attention but now , i'd been used to it . it's not fun to have your brother's fans around . i was so mad about that messy situation . 

" shut up ! i'm the one who should asked you that , i don't even know where is my brother , for 6 years he's not at home since i'm 9 years old . i really missed him a lot , but i can't find him ! so please shut the f**k up , and be quiet , it's my birthday , don't ruin everything ! " i yelled loudly without noticed my face was so red . i thought the fire and the smoke are coming out from all my parts of body . i went out of my classroom , and went to my little secret place , the rooftop of course . 

" i hate being alone , oppa . where are you ? i only can saw you in the television , i can't even hug you , i went to your concert , but the guard told me to get off . i'd told him , i'm your sister . he told me , everyone wants to be your sister . i'm not lying . he's good at his work but not in giving the response , he's cruel " i started to cry , my tears won't stop , the tears always fall when i thought of my oppa and he's not even here with me . 

"you're so cruel , oppa . you said you are not going to leave me ..." i started to smile for awhile as i'm watching his first birthday present for me , a cute little teddy bear with purple glittery dress but it turns out to be tears after that .  

i went to my classroom after that . despite all the gazing at me , i took out my books and read . they were gazing me like i had kill 1000 people . after the ring bells that shows the end of my class at 5 o'clock . i went home quickly because it's going to be rain heavily .

as i reached my home , i went upstair to change my uniform and go back downstairs to watch some of my favourite movies . suddenly ...

*ting tong* 

" omma ? appa ? so soon ... why ... ? " i stood and went to open the door . 

" hey sweety , how are you ? have you taken your bath ? " my daddy always took a good care of me . " get this to the kitchen . and prepared something . your oppp.... " the conversation stop between me and my daddy . it's kind of weird , but it's okay . 

" candy , can you do me a favour ? please take your bath , go shower , put the thing down , omma can do it alone " my mom asked me to take a bath .

i went upstair and took my long , a very long bath . my eyes turns out to be red after that . there's a lot of presents when i reached downstair . i'd been used to it . i don't want any present anymore . just make my wish come true , please .

" omma , will oppa ..... come home today ? on ..... my birthday ? i asked my mom timidly .  worried bout the answer .

my mom don't gave any response , so i changed the topic . " omma , can i help you ?

" sure . get this coffee to your daddy , it's hot so be careful " omma asking for help .

" appa , will seunghyun oppa come home today ? " i asked my father . i put the cup of coffee on a table infront of my father . my father just ignored me . i knew it , they all hate that question because everyday on my birthday , i will ask for the same question . i knew it's annoying but i just want to know . 

as the day runs , now it's 8.50 pm . we gathered at our dining table , enjoying our foods and beverages . but it is just same like my past birthday , my wish couldn't come true . it should be tears fall down , but i do not want my parents worried . as we had finish our eating session , we moved to the next session , the present session . many things i loved . all purple . but no oppa . why ?

when i was trying to open my present , my 39th present , i stopped . " omma , i am tired . i want to sleep . i will continue later . " i said that because i felt so pain in my heart . the pain keeps hit my hurt . i began to cry and ran from my dining room and went to my room . 

" oppa , why you don't come ?!! why ?! i hate you ! you said you will come whenever i need you , but you don't . you lied . you are a liar , such a big liar ! " i began to throw all of my thing randomly . i don't care . my room was so in mess , i will tidy it up later . 

as i'd use all of my strength and energy to get mad and cry , i began to fall asleep . i knew it's not good to sleep after being mad . not good for beauty . but who's care ? 

" oppaaa ... " i started to close my eyes with lot of tears still on my eyes . 

" Candy ... " i felt something touch my cheek . a hand . a man's hand . wait , my oppa's hand . i tried to open my eyes , my it's hurts a lot .

" Candy i'm so sorry that i'd broke my promise toward you . i'm so sorry . " he said . 

" Oppa , is that you ? i tried to open my eyes again . i don't know if it is a dream or reality .

" Happy birthday , candy ... you knew that i'm always love you . but i can't be with you always . i'm so sorry . " a sweet kiss landed on my cheeks , both of my cheeks . but i'm so tired . so i dozed off .

*cuckoo cuckoo*

"Oppa ... " when i woke up , i just yelled it out . i ran downstairs . getting my omma and appa . 

" Omma , is oppa here ? " i asked curiously . " appa , did he ? " i asked again .

they both answered " No . We don't see him . He don't come . we bet he will come next year , 16 is the best number . "

i don't agree with them . i knew he came . i can feel it . i went upstair . seeking for a proof . 

then , i noticed , a big purple hair bow placed on my school bag . i don't have any of that thing yet . and only my oppa knew how to buy my things , i knew he's here . i ran to get the hairbow .

there is a note trapped under ithe hairbow , written " candy , oppa felt so sad because not giving you a full attention . i hope you grow well , i won't be long here , tell omma and appa , that i loved them , and sorry for the food , i had finished it yesterday . i'm so hungry ^.^ i love you , candy . be patient , i'm always with you . " i'm starting to cry . my tears won't stop . i knew he's always with me . always . 

i ran downstair and yelled " appa omma , oppa came home yesterday . he gave me this ....  " what a shock , when i reached the dining room and before finishing my words , i saw my brother was drinking a cup of tea with my parents . i yelled " Oppa ! " i knew he will not leave me like that . i hugged him with not a single words i said . then , i punched timidly at him . i'm not going to ruin my brother's image . " Oppa , i know you will not leave me like , it's not your style . "

" Saranghae , oppa . " i hugged him . 

" What a childish you are ... Saranghae my candy " my oppa smiled . my parents just laughed . after that , i went school with my purple big hairbow , always and forever until i get a new one from my oppa . Oppa leave us because of the coming concert he will going to . 

i hope he's fine . he's always fine . because he's my oppa . my beloved oppa . always .