The Perfection Within Self
Perfection SeriesPart 1 ; 1102w.
If Luhan had to put a face to perfection, it would more than likely be Jongin’s face that he used. It’s the one he pictures when someone mentions the word perfect. When that pesky trailing thought of reaching perfection flits in and out of Luhan’s mind Jongin is the; first, last, and only thing that he can think of. The kid is annoying in the sense that he gets whatever it is that he wants, finds the right path to take hidden within the wrong, and gets the final equation right regardless of the struggle to uncover it.
Luhan is unsure about the fairness of the entire situation, and the unsteady feeling he gets every time he thinks about it only adds more fuel to the already light fire within him. He’s anxious over the facts of Jongin’s perfection. All the edges that have blurred into nothingness, because perfection has no drastically sharp corners it simply fades out in every direction. Jongin’s smile is a little worn around the corners, eyes a little tight around the edges, fingers a little shaky but Luhan finds no flaws in the overall perfect picture that Jongin creates. And Luhan thinks that the spotlight just might be Jongin’s second home because the boy shines beneath the lights.
Jongin has found the perfection within himself.
Luhan views Jongin with a little too much envy for someone as old as he is, someone that should be well past all the adolescent nature of those emotions that well up inside of him every time the other boy crosses his path. Every time that Jongin shyly smiles, or sweetly laughs, or fiercely dances, or quietly talks Luhan really has to hold himself back from exploding to an absurd fit of rage and anger and jealousy that would be more than a little destructive. Luhan doesn’t think that Jongin deserves any negative emotions thrown in his direction, because the younger boy has fallen, and climbed, and drug himself through hell and back to achieve what he has.
Jongin has torn his body apart piece by piece, ripped his throat and lungs and mouth to shreds. The younger boy has broken, shattered, separated, fractured bone and muscle and joint and ligament over and over and over again. There is a bloody trail of true brokenness behind every single step that Jongin takes, and Luhan only finds himself all the more jealous because of it. Jongin has the drive and determination and motivation of all 11 of the others boiling, simmering, sloshing within his own body; bursting free in moments when it’s needed
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