Kyungsoo is the pale, doe eyed boy sitting in the back of the classroom, blowing puffs of air into the cold as he doodles in his notebook. Swirls of lead spinning up the sides of the page, curling around his name and surrounding the sparse notes he took two weeks before. He hums to himself, twirling melodies and harmonies together under his breath as his pencil scratches vines and snakes and ropes into the faded blue lines of the paper.

Turning a couple of pages, (because the lead pressed through the back and leaves a mark, and Kyungsoo likes to start with a clean slate every time) he pressed the tip of the pencil to the top of the page, hesitating before simply closing his eyes, lashes brushing against soft cheeks as he slumped forward over his desk, skin pressing into the grooves of his sweater.

Looking lazily out the window, counting cracks and lines in the glass as his finger traced patterns on the crooked edge of the tabletop. He blinked sleepily, the warmth of the sun filling his heart, as he pressed himself further into his sweater, body curving forward. Eyes flickering back to the window of cracks and dirty brown smudges lining the edges, he yawned widely, eyes falling shut. Suddenly, a warm press of skin is flush against him and the tingles running up and down his spine lock him in place. Shock shudders through him when his eyes snap open and nothing’s there. Sitting up abruptly, a bang sounded before he felt a throb in his knee, traveling up and down his leg as he moaned in pain. Rubbing his sore limb resentfully, Kyungsoo turned back to his pages of vines and snakes and ropes, deciding that it was much more interesting than windows of cracks and lines and dirty smudges. 

~~

It is in the late afternoon that Kyungsoo feels as though there are eyes probing the back of his mind, a hot burn pulsing behind him. His cheek turned to scratch against woolly cloth, red ridges impressed upon his skin. Soft fingertips rub at a tender red blush, eyelashes fluttering apart to reveal dewy eyes glistening with unshed tears from a dream long gone. Deep pupils flit around the room, corner to corner, wall to wall. Secrets spilling from the crayon and pen rubbed on wall paper long since cracked and peeled away. Eyebrows furrowing, confusion marring his expression, Kyungsoo blearily thinks that he must be dreaming, and lazily leaned forward, falling away into sleep.

Strong hands and lean arms gather him up, feet pressing quickly, slapping against cracked pavement wet with rain. Carrying him back to his dream, heart pressing heavy in his chest as cracked lips kiss closed eyelids, barely seeing before fading away into muddled darkness, into wisps of wishes, hues of hope, lilts of love. Kyungsoo’s lids opened, blinking confusedly, staring into nothing but what was once there but isn’t anymore. Gone, gone with nothing left behind.

~~

Kyungsoo’s used to it now, the touches and caresses that leave and disappear just as quickly as they come. Used to falling asleep and waking up with wonderful dreams, the shadow of a kiss burning his cheeks with a flame that seems to spark from within. He grabs hold of those feelings, the feelings of happiness, of having someone there to hold you over through the dark stormy nights of uncertainty.

He finds himself asleep more often than he is awake, heart eager to wake up with soft memories of loving touches lingering on his skin. Being awake means facing the world, means admitting that his life isn’t perfect, isn’t made up of love and smiles and kisses and hugs. It means looking the truth in the eye and not being afraid and Kyungsoo is scared.

So he hides, hides away in his dreams, in cloudy memories and flying away through the sky, because there is nothing he would rather do.

~~

Spinning threads of gold together, Kyungsoo's fingers traveled up and down the spool, barely touching the light unraveling before his eyes. The needle whirred and strung glints and sparks through the cloth, Kyungsoo watching, fascinated. Hands trembling as he the edge of the blanket, he pulled away, stung, when his mother returned, all drunken anger and forgotten resentments, wielding sharp and heavy insults and threats. Kyungsoo cowered, hands wringing nervously, fingers twisting into the hem of his shirt, strings of nervous apologies and stuttered excuses slipping from his lips, one by one, repeating over and over.

Black and blue, bruised heart heavy in his chest, Kyungsoo’s feet touch the cold floor gently, curling away in protest as he stands up in the dark, dark, dark, of the night. Tiptoeing upstairs, skipping the creaking floorboard that always gives him away, Kyungsoo reaches the attic, nervous shaking and trembling taking over him as his hand reaches out to touch the soft worn fabric he’d found earlier. Pulling it from its box, he held it up to his nose, eyes closing contentedly. He remembered his father, his mother, his family, happy and laughing and so, so, much love everywhere.

Keeping his eyes closed, he imagined that it was still them, that they were still the perfect happy family they should be, that his mother was still beautiful and innocent and with child, his perfect younger sister growing inside her. He imagined his father, still at work till the most unreasonable hours, but more than willing to make it up to his son. He imagined the three of them, going to ice cream shops and amusement parks and being happy.

He imagined and hoped and wished and dreamed, and almost didn’t notice that he’d been shifted, moved into bands of warmth encircling his waist. Sputtering, confused, worried, but not afraid, Kyungsoo kept his eyes closed, soft fingertips pressing on his eyelids. Butterfly lips parted to breath out a soft whisper, afraid it would all disappear.

“W-who are you?”

A/N: This is for Jeremy? The pirate baozi. (just don't even ask) 

Uhm for everyone else-this is just the beginning, I was actually planning on this being a lot longer, so I'm going to add more chapters! Yey! I might not be able to update too soon, because of school, but I've written part of the next chap already so we'll see. :)

I love you all, especially subscribers :D (uhm comments, please? XD )