Kyumi; Love,Through The Eyes of A Lover

Love was determination and hopefulness. He had felt both when he was in high school. Kyuhyun had an innocent crush on his senior, the sunny and always-smiling Zhou Mi. Every time he saw Zhou Mi, and the latter acknowledges him, he would get his hopes up suddenly. It wasn’t on purpose, and he didn’t think Zhou Mi’s touches and occasional glances were accidental either. He would just be the innocent Kyuhyun, who seemed too dense to get the meaning of the touches. Once, Zhou Mi had been hugging him so close, with his face very dangerously close to Kyuhyun’s neck as if afraid of letting go. Then there was the time when he would call his senior and say I love you, but the other would brush it off with a laugh and never failed to tell it back to him. He had been stalking Zhou Mi, just to know what the other likes to buy, places he would like to be at or even the simplest things like his favorite color and food. He had never stopped his pursuit of a shared bond between them, and didn’t give up even when that senior of his declined his offer.

Love was crushed hopes and tears. He had been shocked when Zhou Mi got himself a girlfriend, and didn’t hesitate in telling him the truth. He had managed to control himself only to the front of his door, and almost died in front of the door when he fainted, falling head-first onto the cold, hard floor. It was even ironic how the floor seemed to represent Zhou Mi’s heart at that time. His sister had helped him through his sadness, urging him on telling the truth. When she found out that it was something related to love, she was even more determined to help him. The tears that escaped his eyes represent his hopes at that moment, draining each moment. He had cried that there was not even a single one that rolled off his cheeks when Zhou Mi called him that night and told him of his first date with his girlfriend.

Love was pain and heartbreak. His heart had not been in one piece for the next week, and it broke every second. Why? Because damn Zhou Mi’s class was right next to his, in the other building block and he could see everything they; Zhou Mi and his girlfriend were doing. The way Zhou Mi’s arms would find its way around her waist, the way Zhou Mi would brush her hair away from her eyes. Kyuhyun could barely pry his eyes off the both of them when they’re studying together, looking oh-so-lovey-dovey with each other while joking and playing around. Kyuhyun could barely miss the love in Zhou Mi’s eyes for the girl, and the tear in his heart was undeniable.

Love was avoidance and neglect. The moment he saw Zhou Mi’s face, he would step out of his class, or run in the opposite direction. He had no heart to face it again. The pain and heartbreak was too much for his fragile heart to take. Zhou Mi had been looking for him more frequently after that, but all in vain. He had been trying his best to avoid his senior, that he had not seen him for the whole of next month. And then Kyuhyun noticed that Zhou Mi and his girlfriend weren’t so lovey-dovey anymore, and he could rarely see the two of them together, even in the class. It was as if the atmosphere between them wasn’t so good anymore. Had something happened? He would love it if anything bad happen between them, even if it was because of him. He had neglected his heart when he said that, and therefore didn’t notice the slight twinge of his heart, in upsetting his beloved senior.

Love was relief and console. Zhou Mi had succeeded in tracking him down and corner him. Somehow, he had the knowledge of Kyuhyun’s feelings for him and was talking to him about it. Kyuhyun couldn’t decide what he was feeling at that time. Fear? Sadness? Sympathy for himself? Probably all. Kyuhyun was hanging his head low, unable to comprehend anything Zhou Mi was saying, until he told Kyuhyun that he broke up with his girlfriend. It was relief, knowing that he had a chance. Zhou Mi had also told him that he likes someone at that time, but by then, he already learnt not to get his hopes up. He didn’t notice the hot liquid trailing down his cheeks, until Zhou Mi wiped some away with his thumb, whispering sweet nothings and pulling him into a tight embrace. It was then that he let his tears out fully. The tears of happiness.

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