What's the mistake?:

So once upon a time she went out to the garden to pick some grapes and ran into a man there, waiting for her, even though he was asleep. She screamed and all hell broke loose and things went flying as she chased the man out of her garden which was now tainted.

So once upon a time she went out to the garden to pick some grapes and ran into a man there, waiting for her, even though he was asleep. She screamed and all hell broke loose and things went flying as she chased the man out of her garden which was now tainted.

So once upon a time she went out to the garden to pick some grapes and ran into a man there, waiting for her, even though he was asleep. She screamed and all hell broke loose and things went flying as she chased the man out of her garden which was now tainted.

So once upon a time she went out to the garden to pick some grapes and ran into a man there, waiting for her, even though he was asleep. She screamed and all hell broke loose and things went flying as she chased the man out of her garden which was now tainted.

So once upon a time she went out to the garden to pick some grapes and ran into a man there, waiting for her, even though he was asleep. She screamed and all hell broke loose and things went flying as she chased the man out of her garden which was now tainted.

Whoa there nelly. So here's what's wrong. You are over using bold, italics, underline, and strike-out. I'm pretty sure when you are writing a story you don't need to have your whole story bold, italics, etc etc gnfjlda

Here's when it's okay to have a paragraph italics(only):
When you are in a flash back and your character is remembering something from the past.
When your character is thinking. Thoughts in books are usually portrayed with "italics" and other times it isn't.

The only time it's okay to bold a few sentences/paragraphs(never in a story, however):
When its a title, when you are warning people of something, or when it's important information. This is usually in the author notes but shouldn't be in the story. 

The only time it's okay to underline a paragraph/sentence(never in a story):
When it's a title, when you are warning people, when it's important information. Again this should only be in the author notes or on a forward or something.

The only time it's okay to strike out a paragraph/sentence(never in a story):
This should only be in the author notes as well. If you have an idea and want your readers to read it but you've changed your mind you can strike out that sentence that way your readers can read it and also see why you changed your mind. If you are being naughty like i want to have with lee joon
something to these affects.

So how do I fix these mistakes?:

For italics; make sure if you are using italics its either to emphasize a word (seen on chapter four) or for a flashback or thoughts or memories(which is sort of like a flash back anyway)

For bold; When using bold it can either be used to emphasize a word or for a warning and get peoples attention; a paragraph should not be completely bolded in your story. They should only be bolded in an author notes section or forward. That only hurts your readers eyes.

For underlining; if you're emphasizing a word you can underline it. if you are warning people you can underline it, however a whole paragraph in your story should not be underline. Warnings should be in author notes or in your forward.

For strike-out; No paragraph in your story should be strike out. That's extremely tacky. Even if a word is strike out I consider it tacky. You should only strike out words and paragraphs in an authors note section or forward.

Extra tips:

No extra tips for this section.