“Hyung, are you alright?” Jonghyun patted Onew’s shoulder as he was suddenly stranded while the five of them walked towards the stage, passing all fans that were standing on the back of grills, waiting to see their idols up close.

Onew didn’t talk. He had his eyes fixed on a certain direction – on a particular person in the crowd. “Hey, Hey, Old man!” Key, who was behind Jonghyun, reached for the leader’s back and patted it even heavier than how Jong did it just a while ago, “Why stop, eh?”

Since Onew was the first one to walk so all the other four members were behind him, making them stuck at the back as he was still looking closely at someone.

The manager shook his head and thought it was just another Onew Sangtae. He pulled Onew to the stage making the rest followed. “Focus on the performance and stop fooling around, you guys.” He addressed it to all but all of them knew he was just trying to get Onew on his right phase. If he’s not focused enough then he’ll sure create consecutive mistakes on the stage.

The lights on the stage had turned off but Onew was still out of his mind. Minho had to pull him to his position and whispered, “What’s wrong, hyung? Collect yourself now.” He uttered.

As how they expected it, Onew made mistakes throughout the performance, and they weren’t just simple mistakes. There was a time when he even forgot the choreography for a 5 second time frame, also, he dropped his mic, almost fell, and forgot to sing his part.

“What’s wrong with you, Jinki? You were okay just before you stepped on stage!” The manager was really mad after the performance. “You were like… just a mess on the stage! What’s up with you, you man!” He added.

Onew didn’t talk. The other guys, though they feel irritated about not having a perfect performance, thought that something might have been terribly wrong for Onew to be acting like that. He was even laughing and joking as they walked out of the waiting area.

“Park Aera…” Onew uttered, almost whispering. It seemed that he was directing those words to himself.

The four went closer to him, “Who?”

“I saw her.” He said. “She was in the audience. Park Aera.” He repeated. “I didn’t know she has come back.”

“Isn’t she hyung’s first love?” Taemin asked innocently, trying to figure out if the name he remembered was right. Key, who was on his side, nodded. “She’s in the audience? She must be a fan then!”

It was Onew’s worst night. He wasn’t able to do anything normal because his mind was still occupied by a certain someone he just saw. “You should just sleep, hyung.” Key  gently pulled Onew away from the sink as he already broke 2 glasses. “I’ll take care of these.” He said.

Onew walked to the living area but forgot that it was 2 inches elevated from the kitchen. He tripped. Minho and Taemin shook their heads. The last time that he acted like that was when he heard Aera going abroad.

“Regrets make one’s life miserable.” Jonghyun uttered as he stared at the man.

Park Aera was Onew’s highschool hoobae. She was one of the simplest but most intelligent students on their batch. Onew had a crush on her ever since she entered the school. It grew more as time passed by and they became really close.

She was more than happy when he told him he was casted to be an SM Trainee. He felt her support all throughout the training years. Onew first admitted that she likes her to the Minho, who was really close to him even before debut.

As they were about to debut, the four guys tried to encourage him into admitting his feelings to her.  He likes to do it, but was too scared that maybe their relationship won’t stay the same if ever Aera doesn’t have the same feelings.

“You have shown her in every way that you like her not just a friend and she still hangs around with you. I’m sure Aera-ssi feels the same.” He remembered Jonghyun telling that to him several times.

But he failed on the 3 opportunities that were given to him in order to confess. Nervous and worries come right when he was about to say something.

And then she left to study abroad. It was the most terrifying moment Onew could have. He regretted not telling her anything, making her believe that he only thinks she’s cute that’s why he’s making all the efforts to reach to her.

That was the moment when the four saw how Onew sulk big time. He wasn’t talking. He wasn’t doing anything. They were to debut few days from that day but Onew was still out of his mind. He would constantly drop the mic, fall, sing the wrong line, dance the wrong choreography, and worse, forget to do them and just freeze on stage for a moment.

That’s how they call it Onew Condition. Though it may seem that Onew Condition is just him being clumsy, behind the frontal definition is the joke that whenever Onew makes mistake on stage, then it’s because he was thinking about his first love.

That’s also how he was never associated with any girls. There were rumors, but none of them were true. He was so in love with Aera that he couldn’t bear dating other girls. From the start right until that moment, there’s no one but Park Aera.

“5 years and you’re still thinking about her. That’s pure Love, hyung.” Jonghyun said loud enough so Onew could hear it. “But please… don’t be such a coward anymore. Once you see her again, make sure you’ll tell her what she needs to know. It’s not too late until you realized it’s over.”

**** **** ****

“Jinki-sunbae.” Onew stopped as he heard someone calling from his back. He turned, only to find the most familiar face he would want to see all the time.

“Ae-Aera-yah…” He uttered.

“Oh? You still remembered me?” She ran towards her sunbae and greeted him properly. “I thought you forgot about me. I was debating on seeing you because you’re such a big time now.” She smiled.

“How could I ever forget about you?” He asked, full of meaning. “I’ve been thinking about you.”

“Deh?” She was surprised by Onew’s sudden words, and he was, too.

“I mean, there was a time when you entered my mind, well, I have the ability to predict if it will rain… so maybe I also have the ability to predict if an old friend will come.” He smiled, trying to retrieve the embarrassment he had caused in front of her just a while ago.

“We still have schedule, Onew-ssi.” The manager uttered as they were on their way inside the recording studio.

“Oh, yeah, I’m sorry I disturbed you, but this will be quick.” Aera took something from her wallet. “If ever sunbae wants to chat with me here’s my number. I just came back from States few days ago and I’m really proud you made it big in Korea. I want you to know I have been a fan though I didn’t live here for quite a while. I’ll be happy to meet Jinki-sunbae sometime. See you!!” She bowed and quickly left.

Out of nowhere, a smiled appeared on Onew’s lips.

Now, I’ll make sure I won’t regret a thing.