I sat at a corner of the white corridor facing the surgery room. Clasping my hands tightly together, I pressed my lips against the cold titanium ring wrapped around my left finger.

My heart is yours, love, yours alone, love,

and should you wander, there I'll be.

For where you go, love, I will follow.

I started blaming everyone—I started blaming myself for neglecting her.

I started blaming god for making me too blissful that I had forgotten about the feelings of pain and agony. I started blaming my son, the unborn child that I loved so, so much.

“Save the child, Minho.” I remember how Taemin pleaded me with her blood-shot eyes and forceful smile. Taemin pulled me closer and pressed her pale but warm lips against mine.

“We can wait, Taemin. We can wait for another child.” It was then when she placed my hand against her swelling tummy.

“Can you feel his heartbeat?”

“Taemin….”

“Listen to me, Minho. Please….”

“You know I can’t do it, Taemin. I can’t.”

My heart is yours, love, and yours alone.

My heart is yours, love, yours alone, love,

And should the storms rise, there I'll be.

I'll fight for you, love, to not go under,

The surgical room’s door swung open. I hated decision making, probably because Taemin has been the one deciding what should be done. She knew what was best for me, but she never thought for herself.

“Have you decided, Mr. Choi? Mother or child?” The doctor asked me solemnly. I pondered for a while more and wiped the tears away from my eyes.

“…..Child.”

“Are you sure, Mr. Choi?”

“She never did anything for herself so that she could be happy. But I know if Yoogeun survives, she would be.”

my heart is yours, love, and yours alone

You're the song that is my heart,

and it echoes deep and true

but if time should take me far,

I’ll sing till I find you

It was the most tormenting evening of my life.

I cried till my tears went dry.

I screamed till my voice went coarse.

I pounded my fists against the wall till they were bruised.

But I know Taemin was happy.