originally written as a birthday fic (given a year late LOL) with Kris's name as Gage and Tao's name as Blake. i edited it to make it taoris-appropiate.

i still don't ship taoris romantically, but since this wasn't originally written specifically for taoris anyways.... MY RULES REMAIN UNBROKEN. I DON'T KNOW.

set in an alternate (exo does not exist) universe. tao does wushu and kris is some sort of businessman.

sulay as a mentioned side crack pairing. they're my guilty pleasure crack pairing. i don't think they would ever work in reality, but this isn't reality so all rules can fly out the window (like kris the dragon!)

other fics in this universe:

Not A Unicorn Believer, But I Suppose That's Alright feat. sulay
Not Always A Guy, But I Suppose That's Alright feat. hunhan
Not Exactly the Best of Professions, But I Suppose That's Alright feat. baekyeol
Not Exactly The Best Way To Look For A Boyfriend, But I Suppose That's Alright feat. kaisoo

chronologically, the order would be baekyeol, hunhan, taoris, sulay, kaisoo, if you wish to read in that order.

Rated: PG/PG-13 for language

PLAGIARISM IS FORBIDDEN. ACTION WILL BE TAKEN IF THIS HAPPENS.

I do not own EXO, only this piece of writing. This piece is strictly fictitious.