"Yong Guk-ah~" Ji Eun sang, running gleefully towards him.

Yong Guk grinned at the sight of her, flashing his infamous gummy smile.

"Jieun-ah," he laughed as the petite girl jumped into his open arms. He wrapped his arms around her waist, lifting and turning her in the air. Jieun's laughter made its way into his ears and he relished in it. Yong Guk loved her laughter.

He loved everything about Jieun, actually. She was perfect in his eyes. She was, after all, the one who had breathed life into the stuttering fool of a boy he had been, giving him courage and a backbone.

Yong Guk stole a glance at Jieun. She no longer had the black hair from when they first met; she dyed it a light caramel brown - a beautiful colour to compliment her skin tone - when he had dyed his own hair. She kept her straight bangs though. And underneath her bangs were her round eyes that followed with her as she grew, along with the kindness in them. Jieun was still the splitting image of her younger self, the air of innocence around her. She still glowed. The only real thing that changed about her was that she was thinner now, with curves where she didn't have them before.

Yong Guk let Ji Eun down, giving her a quick peck on the forehead. "How was school?"

Ji Eun slipped her small hands into his big ones, intertwining their fingers. They started walking, hand in hand.

"It was alright," she said briefly. Then she pouted, sticking out her bottom lip as far as it would go. She looked up at the Yong Guk with puppy eyes. "Less fun without you there. I wish you stayed in school instead of working at the autoshop."

Yong Guk chuckled at the ever returning topic, tousling her hair. "I told you I'll take the GED later, right?"

"It's just not the same," she whined, furrowing her eyebrows.

Ji Eun stared at her boyfriend, proud of him despite everything else. Yong Guk had changed a lot from the boy she met when she was ten. Back then, he had been quiet and withdrawn, cautious everywhere he went with no friends that she knew of.  Students at school had pointed their fingers at him, calling him the son of a monster, but Ji Eun knew better; she knew that he was sweet. He was the one that brought her wild flowers every week, the one that sang for her when she cried and the one that never missed her birthday. Now, that sweet boy, all grown, walked with a sort of confidence she didn't know he was capable of. Somewhere along the lines, Yong Guk had grown up tall, lean and muscular, with a sharp jawline and even sharper eyes. Fiery red hair caught the attention of many as they walked down the street, but his stare turned away just as much. In a wife beater, dark denim and a leather jacket, he appeared as what everyone predicted he would become: a thug. Once again, Ji Eun knew better. She knew the real Yong Guk, sweet and hard working, and loved him to bits.

"Looks like I'll end up supporting a jobless husband," Ji Eun sighed, shaking her head for extra effect.

"What did you say?" Yong Guk warned jokingly, taking his free hand to tickle Ji Eun at her sides. She squeaked before letting out a burst of giggles.

"Don't worry! I'll still love you," she breathed out through her laughter, trying to stop Yong Guk's hands.

At her words, Yong Guk stopped walking and turned Ji Eun so that they were facing each other. He released her hand and used both arms to pull her into him at the waist, bringing his forehead to hers. He bore into Ji Eun's eyes.

"Really?" he asked in the velvety smooth voice of his. At times like this, it drove Ji Eun uncomfortably crazy for him.

"Through thick and thin," she responded as she blushed a deep pink.

"No matter what?"

"No matter what."

"We'll be together?"

"Always."

Yong Guk showed her his gummy grin, satisfied by her answers. He leaned in then, planting a kiss on her soft lips.

"I love you, Ji Eun."

"BANG!"

The sound of the gunshot echoed in the dark alleyway. Or perhaps it was only ringing in his ears, stuck on loop inside his head. He watched solemnly as the man before him dropped to his knees, blood oozing out of his mouth and the hole the bullet made in his chest. The dying man glared into Yong Guk's eyes, causing the teenager to flinch involuntarily. With a thud, he fell face first into the hard, grey cement.

Yong Guk took a moment to catch the breath he had been holding and calm his racing heartbeat. The gun looked awkward in his hand now, somehow both too large for his hands but too small for his fingers. The cool metal sent chills up his spine. But the deed was done and it was all over.

Was it?

It never was. He knew from experience; this hadn't been the first time Yong Guk killed a man, ever since he joined the gang and dropped out of school. The other parts weren't as bad: the drug deals, the ammunition, the late nights, the places they went, the people they saw. Even the gang fights weren't too terrible, as long as it was purely fist to fist. However, there were occasions like tonight, when he was specifically ordered to take the life someone who had displeased his boss.

Yong Guk hated it. Whenever he held the gun up to a man, he saw his cursed father, smirking back at him. You're exactly like me, he would say to Yong Guk, followed by a cackle. Then he would pull the trigger and his father would be gone. And Yong Guk couldn't wait to get back to Ji Eun, breathing in her scent and listening to her sing to remind him that he was still... human. 

With a quivering exhale, he dropped his arm holding the gun, praying for the dead man. Afterwards, he quickly went through the clean up process in his mind, his heart already at Ji Eun's side. The faster he worked, the earlier he could see her.

"Bang Yong Guk."

At the sound of another voice, his hand released the gun. The empty metal clattered on the ground.

No...

Slowly, Yong Guk turned, every inch of his body filling with dread. Cold sweat started running down his back. Yong Guk was praying again, but not for the man he murdered. When he finished turning, he pleaded to God he didn't see her, the owner of the beautiful voice...

Yet there she was. His definition of perfection, staring back at him with wide eyes full of tears. He saw the hurt and horror on her face. Yong Guk watched as her innocence slipped away like fall leaves blown away by the wind; he stood, frozen.

Ji Eun could barely breath. Her eyes were searching him, trying to find the Yong Guk that she knew. She looked for the crying boy of ten, the sweet, sweet boy he was. She looked for her confident Yong Guk, the one that could protect her from anything in the world. Because, surely, it was not this man that stood before her. It was not this man, with his dead eyes and a gun by his feet. Surely, there was no way Yong Guk could be this man.

"Ji Eun-ah," his voice croaked out painfully, course and regretful. His heart was crumbling away. Yong Guk didn't know what he could do, what he could say.

He walked towards Ji Eun to soothe her, but froze again as he watched her.

One step... Two steps...

Carefully, the trembling girl walked backwards. Instinctive steps taken to be away from him.

"Baby, no," Yong Guk choked, desperate to reverse the whole situation. She shouldn't have been here; she shouldn't have seen him. Why did this happen?

Ji Eun bit down on her bottom lip, the tears flowing over. He was Yong Guk, there was no denying it. It was Yong Guk with the gun at his feet, a criminal now. The accusing whispers of her family and friends played in her head. They told her he was nothing but trouble. They told her blood runs thicker than anything else. They told her he was the same as the rest of society's scum. They told her that he would hurt her. But Ji Eun had trusted him.

She started to turn on her heel to run away. She was unable to face the reality before her; she wanted to hide from it all. Ji Eun wanted nothing more than to live her blissfully oblivious life with Yong Guk, but how would she ever forget what she saw?

Before she had a chance, Yong Guk was in front of her, embracing her. Warmth radiated to Ji Eun from him, as it always did when his arms were around her. He was her Yong Guk, sweet as honey. Ji Eun let out a sob as her heart tightened. He was her Yong Guk, but that didn't change the truth of what happened.

"No, it's not like that," Yong Guk whispered into her hair, her hair to calm her.

Ji Eun would have trusted his words wholeheartedly before. But she didn't know what to believe anymore.

Yong Guk held Ji Eun all the more tighter at her silence, her miserable cries breaking his heart. Tears stung his eyes as the guilt of hurting Ji Eun drowned him. Then it wouldn't stop as he realized he might lose her tonight.

"You know me. You know this isn't me."

Ji Eun couldn't stop shaking as she pulled away from Yong Guk. She looked up at him, her vision blurred by her flowing tears.

"I-I-I... I'm... s-scared-d..." she stuttered out in a frail voice.

Of me, Yong Guk heard her unfinished sentence. It tore him apart. It was happening; he was losing her. He was losing Ji Eun, the only one who was always on his side. He was losing the only person he cherished. He was losing the only person worth living for. The light in his life that came to him seven years ago was slipping away.

Yong Guk felt hot tears roll down his cheeks as he felt close to insanity. He wrapped his slightly trembling hands around her face, like she did the first time they met. He made sure Ji Eun stared right at him.

"No. Look at me. Don't leave me like this, Ji Eun. I need you. You know that. I'm... I'm not what you just saw. Ji Eun-ah..."

Ji Eun's head spun. She was too overwhelmed; she didn't know what to think. But in her mind, the horrific moment started replaying over and over again.

Bang Yong Guk pointing a gun at the strange man. Muttering some words. Staring with cold eyes. Pulling the trigger. The bullet travelling straight to the man's heart, killing him nearly instantly. The man dropping the the ground, blood pooling around him.

He pulled the trigger, it dawned upon Ji Eun freshly. Yong Guk killed him. Yong Guk murdered him.

"Ji Eun-ah... Don't. Please don't. Don't leave me. Without you... If you leave me, I don't know... How can I live without you?" Yong Guk sobbed out, fear gripping at him. He was desparate to keep her by his side; he needed Ji Eun, the rock of his life. Yong Guk would have paid all the money in the world just to erase her memory of this moment. He prayed and prayed that Ji Eun would hear his plea and forgive him. But Ji Eun wasn't listening.

Abruptly, Ji Eun forcibly pushed Yong Guk away with all her remaining energy. She looked at Yong Guk carefully, but it wasn't her beloved Yong Guk that she saw. It was a killer standing in front of her. She saw a murderer with hair as red as fire, crying blood tears.

"D-don't t-t-t-ouch me..." she muttered out unevenly, still shaking like a leaf.

Yong Guk felt all the circulation in his body stop. Then came the blow of the words, the wind knocked out of him.

"Y-y-you're... You're a monster," Ji Eun hissed out, cutting a wound into Yong Guk's heart deeper than the thousands of times he had been ignored, beaten and insulted.

She whipped around and ran away as fast as she could, leaving Yong Guk with only the echo of her footsteps in the empty alleyway.

Don't go... Don't go... Please don't go...

Yong Guk saw the way Ji Eun had looked at him. The eyes that had always warmed up to him, ever since they met seven years ago, turned dead cold. She stared at him the way everyone else stared at him, with icy judgmental eyes. Eyes that told him they hated the very fact that he existed.

No, Ji Eun-ah... No...

I'm not a monster...