It was raining too, the first time I met her. She jerked and squealed when the thunder cracked. She didn't bring any umbrellas, so she wait for the rain to stop to walk home. I never talked to her before. She was a bookworm. She spent most of her lunchtime at the library. I did, sometime, want to visit the library and start a conversation. But being a popular guy as I was, among both boys and girls, somebody always had to interrupt me on my way. It wasn't like I was interested in her, no. But she was always alone in the class, and it nudged me.

"Shall we walk home together?" I offered. Behind her glasses, she looked at me in doubt. I gave her my best smile.

"If that wouldn't be a problem to you, yes, I appreciate it."

Wow, she was well composed. And I thought she was your regular nervous-shy maiden-grumpy-nerd girl. "No, not at all."

She didn't wear her glasses anymore now. Ever since we dated, she wore contact lenses. Which made me realized her beautiful eyes, graceful almond-shaped eyes that I loved so much, were now red and swollen.

"I tried to change, Daehyun," she said among her sobbing. "I tried to become pretty so that you wouldn't look away from me." She sniffled and swept her golden hair to the back with her hand. She gulped a lump in . "I did everything..." She murmured. It was true.

Each day, she became prettier and prettier. She didn't wear glasses anymore. She put a little make up before going to school. She changed her uniform, showing her perfect curved body. But she was still my nice smart girl. Even though all my friends drooled over her, she didn't look away. Many girls were unhappy. But she faced them. She was a strong girl... Even when a girl told her she was dating with me, she would shake off that idea. She wouldn't believe any bad news from here, until she saw it with her own eyes, or hear it from my mouth. What she didn't know was, I really did have a relationship with that girl.

She asked me out, once, despite my status wasn't single anymore. We enjoyed our time. It was different when I was with her. The girl was more aggressive, wilder, ier. But when I met my girl again, I can't help but feel attractive. I would pick her up at her house and when we were out of her parents' sight, I would kiss her neck and gripped her waist. She would giggle and reply me back with a morning kiss. I loved that gentle side of her. This, apparently, made the other girl mad. She would call me and I just answered her coldly. Until finally, she confronted my girlfriend. And guess what, my girl won. 

One day, after we graduated, we came to her parents' house. She introduced me and tell them about our plan to stay together. Her dad immediately stood up, glaring at both her and me.

"You are merely 18 years old! What do you know about life?! Staying together with a man who isn't even your husband? Absurd!"

"Daddy, please," she said in a calm tone. "Daehyun is a nice guy, we wouldn't do anything funny..."

"Then why do you have to stay together?!" Her father's voice was loud and scary. Her mom only looked down, unable to say anything.

"Daehyun will go straight to work at his father's company, and I will go to college. We won't be able to see each other often if---"

"Do you have to see each other every minute and seconds? You'll survive! Just meet up every weekend!"

"No, dad, you don't understand! I... I love him so much," she grabbed my hands for support. Yes, she trusted me so. She always did.

"What does this even mean to you?" She showed me our wedding ring. She pulled it, trying to get it off her finger. I jolted to her and tried to stop her. "No, stop it!" I begged. "Let go of me!!" She tried to break free, but I won't let her. I covered her hands in mine and held it tightly, glued it to my chest, as if to protect it... Protect the tiny, slender fingers. Holding her smooth, olive arm skin.

"Let go!!" She squealed as she punched my shoulder with her free hands. Soon, the hand became limp, her energy wasted too much on her crying. She sobbed hard, she kept saying the same words, but it wasn't clear for she sobbed too much. I pulled her to my embrace, then. Only to be pushed back.

"You sure about this?" I rubbed her hand gently as I observed her face on the bed. We were facing each other, covered in blanket. I held her hands to comfort her, because she just made a hard decision.

"Well, I wanted to be with you," she smiled. "Even if dad wouldn't approve."

I smiled, rubbing her cheek. She never doubted me, ever. When I said we should just leave and go somewhere your parents don't know and live together, she aprroved the idea. Without even thinking twice. That was how much she loved me. Everyday, I would take her to her university before going to work. We passed a goodbye kiss, and in the evening, when I went home from work, she would greet me with a welcoming kiss and a set of dinner. She was such a perfect wife.

But at work, the ladies would keep their eyes on me. I was the youngest, handsome, and I will be inherited the position of the owner of the company from my dad. They raced to become my lover, even if I told them I already had a girl, they wouldn't mind become my second.

"Daehyun-ah, let's go to the bar. Noona's treat."

I looked at her. She was my personal assistant. It was 3 years after I started to live with my girlfriend. We were about to married a year from now. She was getting busier and busier, because her final test is coming soon. Even if she was home, she would study until midnight. It started to feel lonely. I threw myself to work, and I became close to this woman-- Hyuna was her name. Not only her, though. All the ladies in the office suddenly became friendly and flirted around me. This made my boy friends jealous. My partners complained that I played around too much. Moreover, I'm still the youngest. One by one, the steep cliff bertween getting bigger and bigger, further and further... And I barely had a chance to talk to my girl, back home. 

"...I probably will be home late today," I spoke to the phone.

"Why?" The sweet voice asked me through the speaker.

"Well, we want to go the usual bar," I went to the bar several times now. The first time was when I considered an adult, we held a party there. Then, once a week we would always go there, hanging out.

"Isn't it usually on Thursday?"

"Yeah, well. Today was a job well done, we want to celebrate it," I lied. Not the first time.

"Oh..."

"I won't be eating at home tonight, okay?

"Okay... Don't get drunk too much."

"I know. Bye, baby. Love you."

"Bye. Love you too." She was sad. I could tell from her tone. She was lonely. Today was her last exam day. She had 7 days off before starting the new semester.

Hyuna noona told an interesting story. She was such an appealing woman, many men would die for her. I was attracted to her. We matched each other. Everything I said, she agreed and vice versa. We had so much in common. We talked too much that I forgot about the time.

"I had fun tonight, Daehyun," said her as we parted our way.

"Me too, noona. Thanks for the treat. I should repay you sometime."

"I don't want to be paid back with money."

"With what, then?"

She smirked meaningfully. She came closer and kissed my cheek as she whispered to my ear, "....this."

At home, I found a half-eaten cake. On wall, there was a paper, merrily decorated and with a cute handwriting, it said, 'I finished my exam! Yay!' There were many left overs. She cooked many food for two. And she couldn't finish them all alone. She had a little party here... Alone. I went to our room. Sitting on the side and rubbed her cheek gently, which woke her up. "...I'm sorry, sweetheart," I gently kissed her forehead. She gave a mild smile, she was quick to forgive.

"Why?" She screamed for nobody to hear among the noise of rain, in the middle of this dark, quiet sidewalk. "Why did you do this to me?!" She pushed me back. "I hate you, I hate you, I HATE YOU!!" She screamed her lungs out. "Leave me alone!!"

"I can't do that!"

"I don't want to see you again!!" Her words strucked me.

"...Please don't do this..." I shook my head slightly. Begging her not to say those words, as her eyes looked at me, I could tell what she was going to say, and I pleaded her not to say it. I couldn't bear to hear those words.

The moment I slipped the wedding ring to her finger was the moment I would never forget. We smiled so widely that we thought we couldn't stop smiling for the rest of our lives. Even though her parents weren't there, she didn't care, although I saw some sadness and regrets in her eyes. But she told me she was happy, as long as I was with her. She loved me so. She loved me too much. With my dad's money we made a luxurious wedding party. This was the moment we always waited for. Yet what she didn't know, me and Hyuna were still entwined our relationship.

Year by year passed. She worked at my company too. I was officially the owner of the company now. Being as pretty as she was, many men tried to be friendly to her, but no one dared to go any further than friends, because she was their boss' wife. But rumours were always there.

"Do you know that a guy confessed his love to your wife?" Hyuna said one night, when we were cleaning up things at my office before we go home.

"Who would dare doing such thing?" I didn't believe her at first.

"I believe the name is Aron, or something."

"...Really? What did she say then?"

Hyuna approached me. She pushed me to my table. Her face was really close to me, I could even felt her breath. "I don't know." She knew. She knew I started to lose my trust in my wife. And she knew it was the perfect chance. She kissed me deeply, passionately. I let out all of my worries, at that moment, I really didn't care about my wife. Lately we seldom talk outside job. I was busy, she was busy. Everytime I went home, hoping that she would greet me like she used to, she already fell asleep. I had to heat up the dinner. I ate alone. The lonelines engulfed me. Hyuna was the only one I felt comfortable with. I shared my loneliness with her.

I stayed the night at Hyuna's apartment. At midnight, my phone rang. It was her. She must've been wondering why I hadn't come home. But I ignored it. I put my phone on silent mode, and I ignore the vibration it created every time she called me, over and over. When the sun rose, it was Sunday. Hyuna asked me to go the mall. I didn't even remember to go home. Hyuna asked me this and that to buy for her. I didn't mind at all. It was fun, walking in the mall with my lover. It has been such a long time since the last time we go on a date. At night, I dropped Hyuna at her apartment. I told her I should go home. So we kissed goodbye.

At home, the woman who greeted me with a concerned look, had a swollen red eyes, messed up hair and face, and dried lips. Even an idiot could tell she hadn't been sleeping. Probably not eating either. "Dammit, Daehyun, where have you been?" she asked in a trembling voice. Her hands nervously folded in front of her chest. She always did that when she was worried or angry. "I almost called the police!" She said, tears started to well up in her eyes.

"Stop exaggerating things," I shook my head as I loosen my tie and removed my tux. "I was with my business partners, okay? Calm down."

"You could've just tell me!" She raised her voice. "I-I was worried sick! You didn't come home yesterday, I-I..."You didn't even answer my phone, I thought---" she stuttered.

"Relax, okay? I'm fine," I said in a cold tone, which added more to her fury.

"Why didn't you tell me?" She squealed.

"Do I have to report every single thing to you?!"

"You didn't come home for a night, GOD DAMMIT, Daehyun!! Every wife would be concerned!!" She stopped, realizing something. "...You reek of perfume," she whispered. "You never wear any perfumes," she stated. Her voice was trembling, she realized something, but she couldn't say it.

"So what if I wear a perfume?"

"That's a woman's perfume, Daehyun... You-- What--" She tried to calm herself. "Who have you been meeting?"

I didn't answer. And when I didn't, she knew what that meant. "You're meeting with another girl?" She whispered, afraid to say it out loud. "Is that why you always come home late, recently?" She kept asking. "For how long?"

"Oh please, there was nothing, okay?"

"So how did you explain why you always came home late? Why do I always smell the same perfume when I washed your clothes?"

So she knew. She just didn't say it. "So what if I'm meeting another girl, no big deal."

She opened to say something, but the words wouldn't come out. Instead, a tear trickled down. Feeling like I won with my words, I continued, "A guy also confessed to you, right? How do you explain that?"

"Daehyun," she looked at me in disbelief. "He's a close friend. I rejected him, giving him a understandable that I'm your wife."

"Yeah, I'm sure he knew that already, but why did he confessed to you anyway? Huh?"

"I don't know!" She raised her voice, and so did I.

"You must've done something to him! You flirt with him, that's why he thought he had a chance!"

"What? For heaven's sake, Daehyun, I never did that!" She looked at me in fury, in disbelief. Our bonds and our trust were starting to shatter, I could feel it. "We've been together since high school, not once did I betray you!"

"Perhaps that's because no guy wanted to flirt with you," I shrugged. "Even if there was a guy, you wouldn't tell me."

"I never hid anything from you!!"

"How did you prove that!"

"It's not like I can't have a boy friend--"

"Well I want to have a girl friend too!"

"But you stayed a night with her!"

"At least she kept company, unlike you who is so absorbed in your work!!"

I panted. She froze. She loss at words, analyzing my words. "...Is that why...? Is that why you---" She couldn't handle her tears. "...Do you still love me, Daehyun?"

I froze. I didn't expect her to say that. It was supposed to be answered with the most obvious answer between husband and wife. But I couldn't say the words. Why, I wonder. I was hesitated. Usually, I could make a speech out of sweet words, expressing my love for her on a hundred papers. But right now, it was difficult for me to even say those 3 words.

"Do you?" She asked me again. "...Do you love me?" She started to sob, she knew I couldn't say it. "Tell me!" she squealed. She guessed the answer, and her feet hardly bear her weight, because of it. She started to fall and I caught her, but she pushed herself away. "Stay away from me!!" She asked me one last question, "Back in high school... That girl..." She pointed at me, holding back her tears and gulped a lump in . "...Did you really date with her?" Again, I was silenced. What would she do if I tell her the truth? "Did you?!" She yelled. I gulped and with a low voice, she probably didn't even hear it, I told her, "...Yes."

She froze. She nodded, gesturing she understood. She turned her back and walked out the door. I wanted to call her back, but I was too engulfed in my anger than I thought, 'Fine!' I called Hyuna and told her to come over. She sounded happy. She asked if I had a fight with my wife, and I told her so. She said she would come over and comfort, but she remind me to buy her a new pair of shoes. Whatever, I thought. Waiting for her to come, I didn't do anything but sit on the couch. It was so quiet. The clock made the only sound in the room. I noticed it was dark. The light hadn't been . There was a book on the table. It was our photo book. I remembered we keep it on the drawer, my wife must have brought it here. Did she read it just now?

I opened the book, and the very first photo I saw was our graduation photo. We took stupid photos with our friends, and there were some photos with only me and her. 'We'll be facing my parents,' her handwriting could be read beside the photo. And it didn't end up well, as I recalled. Below it, was the photo we took when we first moved here. 'New house! <3' 'Though the parents didn't approve, the stubborn girl ran away...' I read our handwritings, there were even some doodles. She drew a moustache on my photo, and I drew red dots on her cheek, made her looked like a clown. I snorted and I smiled seeing it. The next pages were our photos when we went to amusement park, picnic, at her college, my first day of work, her first cooking, her inauguration... And then I arrived at our wedding photo. There were some part of the photo that was crumpled, as if a drop of water just landed there. It was still new. She must be crying when she saw this. Our wedding photo... We were smiling so happily. 'Together forever!' 'I will always love you, my baby.' 'Never to be apart.' 'You mean the world to me.' Our doodle continued. I rubbed the photo. Her face. Her beautiful face. Was this how much I loved her? Was this how pretty she was? Why didn't I realize it now? The next page was supposed to be empty, but there was handwritings there now. It must be hers, I knew this handwriting well.

'Daehyun-ah... You are the only person I love in this world. I don't need anything else, as long as I'm with you. But now that you're not here, what am I supposed to do? I always believe you, I always do. I don't want to live without you, I can't... Daehyun-ah, my love for you is never falter. I love you, I love you so much, I love you too much, that I can't bear to think that you're with another woman... Do you love me as much as I love you? Why aren't you here, Daehyun? Where are you?'

The page was crumpled. She was crying when she wrote this. I felt my hand was trembling as I rub the handwriting. I missed that handwriting. In fact, I missed her now. How long has it been since we last talked? How long has it been since I said I love her? How long has it been... Since I forgot how much I love her?

I jolted from the couch, throwing the book back on the table. I have to chase after her, that was the only thing that was on my mind. I want to be with her. I was sos tupid I just realized it now. But when I wanted to open the door, someone knocked. I opened it and Hyuna was there. Without a warning she threw herself to me, hanging her hands around my neck.

"Daehyun-ah, you're lonely, aren't you? Noona's here, so let's forget her and have some fun, hmm?"

I looked at her. Her words strucked me. "Noona... Forgetting her is something I could never do."

"What?"

"Noona, why do you always wear red lipstick?"

"Huh? Because it makes me look y. Woman loves wearing red lipstick, don't you know that?"

"I don't like red lipstick."

"Oh, men always lack of senses."

"Would you change the color for me, noona?"

"Change what?"

"Change your lipstick. And don't wear high heel above 7 cm. And no perfume. Can you do that for me?"

"Whaaat? No way!"

That's all I need to hear. I gave a slight apologetic smile and pushed her back outside. I locked the door and pat her on the shoulder, and started to run, to find my my wife. The one and only girl I wanted for life.

And that's how I ended up here.

"...Let's divorce," those words sent shiver down my spine.

"I can't," I immediately speak up, hoping she would change her mind. "I can't do that. No. I don't even want to imagine it."

She sniffled, she folded her arms again, either she was nervous or cold. "I can't live with you anymore. Every time I'm near you I smelled someone else's perfume. It made me sick. The image of you and her keep spinning in my head, I--I... I can't bear it, I can't..." She shook her head, making her wet hair trembled.

"No, please, I'm sorry, I'll make up for it, I'll do anything!" I started to raise my voice. I could feel the tears forced me to release them. "I can't let you go. I can't..."

She shook her head, biting her trembling lips. "You lied to me. Not once. I don't know how many times you lied, you never told me. Even right now, I don't know if you're lying. But I always believed you," she smirked, laughing at her own stupidity. "Even now I believe you..." She sobbed.

"How could you, Daehyun...?"

I had nothing to say to that. I hurt her so much, I just realized that. If I had to say sorry over a thousand times for her to forgive me, I would. "...You can't do this," I took one step closer. She wasn't avoiding me this time. "You can't leave me, you know that. We loved each other so... Didn't we?"

She looked at me. "...I did. I loved you so. But I don't know about you," she whispered.

"I know I'm such a moron, I hurt you, and I'm sorry, but... I," I stuttered. "When I saw our photobook, I realized... I realized just how much I loved you. Just imagining you walk away from me gave me an image of nightmare," I held her shoulder. "...So, don't leave. Please," my voice started to tremble. Her eyes were softened. When I thought I might just have a second chance, she smiled and say,

""...It's over, Daehyun," we stared at each other. She gave a determined look and I gave her a disbelief look. "You and me... It's over. I can't do it anymore." Slowly she stepped away from me. Behind her, the alarm rang, stating that a train is coming. The portal started to close down. She was backtracking, right to the rail. But I was too focused seeing her leaving me that I couldn't tell what she was doing.

"You can't forget me. You couldn't."

"You're right..." She smiled bitterly. "I couldn't. I couldn't live without you either," she was getting closer to the rail and then it strucked me.

"...Stop," I whispered, begging.

"...I love you, Daehyun, I always do," her tears started falling.

I tried to keep up with her pace, my heart was thumping. "No, come back!" She looked at me with tears in her eyes, as if it was the last time she would see me. "Come back to me!" I raised my voice and my tears started to falling. Don't do it, don't do it, I begged her in my heart. She was right in front of the portal. We could hear the sound of train from faraway.

"....Do you love me, Daehyun?" She said as she passed the portal and keep getting closer to the rail. "...Right now?"

Now, without thinking I shout my heart out, "I love you more than anyone than else!!" I ran to her and intended to snatch her from the rail. But the sound of the train was getting louder, as it mixed with the sound of the alarm.

"...How much?," she smiled playfully. I grabbed her, trying to drag both of us out the rail. But we both knew; we won't make it.

I couldn't hear the sound of the train anymore, nor the alarm. All was quiet and the train's lamp was too bright that I couldn't see anything. Yet I could felt her warmth in my embrace.

"I don't think I'll be able to live without you... That is how much I love you."

I closed my eyes, putting our life on the hands of God, I didn't want to care whether we make it or not. What mattered is I'm with her... That was all I could think about. The last thing, I heard was the voice I longed for so much, the voice that I love so much...

"...Daehyun-ah... Let's stay together forever.... Shall we?"

~f i n~

Sorry I killed them again LOL I was sooo confused about the ending!

I hope this is satisfying... Please let me know what you think! Subscribe if you like it~ ^^ And do check out my other fanfic! ^^

Thanks for reading!