Mblaq is in the practice room rehearsing for their comeback due in January. It has been their tenth run-through of the song It's war and they decided to take a break. Thunder sits cross-legged on the floor, dead tired. As he sits there, he scans the room where s are either lying down on the floor trying to catch their breath, or drinking water. And just like most days, his sight lands on one of the hyungs who had been plaguing his mind not-so-recently. 

Joon is leaning on one of the mirror walls with his head down and his arms loosely draping over his knees. He looks even more tired than two days before in which Thunder had the chance to see him. He has been working nonstop throughout the year, whether it be variety shows or their own promotions. He looks so worn out. And it is times such as these that Thunder wished he could just go and sit with him and just be some kind of comfort for his hyung. Times wherein he'd want to at least put a smile on his hyung's face, not a fake smile nor a tired smile, but that genuine smile that everyone loves. Just like before, before this gap between them have become bigger and bigger. 

He didn't even know when his closest hyung have started to distance himself from him. It was at some point during their BLAQstyle promotions when he finally noticed. Joon, he noticed, haven't talked to him much about anything other than the usual conversations that comes about due to living together. By then, he thought that maybe his hyung is just busy and that he shouldn't have such selfish thoughts. It was good enough excuse for a few months but it stretched on for almost half the year. Even during Sesame Player, he'd notice that Joon's hyper mannerisms towards him during the broadcast would just as easily die out when the cameras turn off, and Joon withdraws back to himself. It was almost to the point wherein he ignored Thunder completely. 

That wasn't what caught him the most though. It was that Joon became closer and closer to Cheolyong as the months passed. He'd notice that whenever all five of them are together, the sub-groups would be Mir and Joon then Thunder, Seungho, and G.O. Thunder didn't particularly have any problems with them being close. They're a group, and their friendship with each other's basically what keeps them together. No, it was that he saw his and Joon's closeness before in them. How Joon goes to him whenever he wanted to freely share what was on his mind. And it was what Thunder treasured the most, and because he's too much of a coward to ask what the problem was, he realize that he wouldn't have that anymore.  

It's almost a year now, and there is it again. This tight feeling in his chest whenever he had such thoughts. He didn't even notice that he had his hand on his chest when Seungho, their ever caring leader asked what was wrong. He quickly erased every single thought of Joon in his mind and answered a quiet "Nothing" to the leader.

"Are you sure? You should rest if you're not feeling well. It wouldn't be good if you'd get sick a week before our comeback" Seungho said in a concerned tone. Now that caught everyone's attention. Even Joon lifted his head to look at him.

"No, hyung really I'm fine. Just trying to catch my breath is all. You know how easily I get short out of breath" Thunder replied with a slight smile. Someone who'd pay close attention to him would know he was lying. He hasn't been short out of breath in months. Isn't the purpose of all the work out he has done, exaclty for that?  But years of being short out of breath took over those months wherein he hadn't been, and the members bought the lie. They continued practicing throughout the night without his thoughts ever trailing back to Joon. But who is he kidding? It always trails back to Joon. 

xXx

a/n: End of chapter for now. I'm sorry if I made it out that Joon was putting an act during sesame player, this is purely fiction you guise, I didn't even want to put it but I had to ;_; anyway, I hope this chapter's okay. I'll update soon :)