It was a wonderful spring day and an uneventful day for the seven boys of Infinite. They had gathered around in their posh dormitory’s living room and were watching a documentary about beaching whales. The whole dorm was filled with sounds of noodle-slurping and the calm soothing voice of the commentator originating from the Samsung flatscreen mounted on the wall.

All of a sudden, Lee Sungjong sniffed.

“Goodness Sungjong, can you not cry while we are enjoying our noodles? And who cries on a schedule free day?” Kim Sunggyu sighed, sticking a chopstick into a dumpling and lifting it to his mouth: “Good gracious.”

Jang Dongwoo chokes on his dumpling and Lee Howon has to pound him on his back. While the others remain oblivious to his near death, Jang Dongwoo turns to thank Lee Howon after spitting out the stray dumpling skin that travelled to his windpipe and gasped, “Howon! Don’t cry! I won’t die just because I choked!”

5 other pairs of eyes turned to Lee Howon and stared. Hard.

“Stop judging me! The whales beached! Why would they want to commit suicide? I mean, isn’t life good under the sea? Don’t tell me Sebastian hoodwinked me, I can’t take that blow!”

“Who is Sebastian?” “You were not tearing because of me?” “Yadong couple fight!” “Hyung! Why are you knocking your head against the bowl of dumplings?”

Kim Sunggyu raises his head in gratitude towards Nam Woohyun’s direction, thankful that the boy cared about him being hurt.

“If we spoil the bowl we’ll have to buy it and we’ll be overpriced for a piece of lousy crockery!”

Kim Sunggyu decides that he hates his life right now.

Lee Sungjong blows his pretty nose in a piece of tissue, sounding more like an elephant than his imitation on a previous gag show. The elephant sound distracts everyone else from a tearing Lee Sungyeol and his sniffs as he reaches for a piece of tissue.

Kim Myungsoo calmly finishes his second bowl of noodles and burps. Patting his tummy, he offers his first sentence of the day, “Stop sniffing like a girl Sungjong, beaching is accidental. If it were intentional, the whales would not be struggling to get back into the waters.”

Lee Sungjong sniffs into the shoulders of Lee Howon and opens his mouth to speak when Lee Sungyeol beats him to it.

“God Myungsoo, just because you have an emotional range of a teaspoon doesn’t mean other people cannot show their emotions when watching such an emotional documentary!”

Silence. For 2 whole minutes.

If Hyoan Hyung walks in at that moment of silence, he would have whisked the mouth-agape boys (sans Lee Sungyeol whose smile was slowly stretching across his face) to the hospital because frankly speaking, silence between the boys only happens when they are sick. Or suffering from extreme fatigue.

Jang Dongwoo breaks the silence by going into ROFL mode, rolling on the floor and chortling, Jang Dongwoo style. Kim Sunggyu, with the dumpling bowl above his head, throws his head back and laughed whilst his eyes disappeared into the fair skin. The dumpling bowl breaks of course. Nam Woohyun’s heavy HAHAHAHA follows and Lee Howon, Lee Sungjong smile with tears b in their eyes.

Kim Myungsoo is not amused. His Jiu X Hyun Soo facade appears and he stares at Lee Sungyeol.

“Emotional range of a teaspoon? How so?” Kim Myungsoo purrs gently.

Oblivious to his current danger, Lee Sungyeol shrugs. “Dongwoo hyung has an emotional range of a soup ladle, Sunggyu hyung a tablespoon, magnae would probably be a rice scope. Woohyun is a problem because he is too greasy so I’d say he is a soup ladle like Dongwoo hyung, just shallower and greasier. Howon on the other hand is too calm and usually too silent for me to judge oh but he does make me laugh once in a while so I’d say he is a normal spoon we use to eat with. But Kim Myungsoo, your emotional range is a teaspoon. You’ve only got silence and tears, the occasional happiness so that’s three emotions. Is silence even an emotion? I don’t know, but I think that’s ‘nuff said.” He places his chopsticks across his bowl and wipes his mouth with the same piece of tissue that he used to blow his nose previously.

Nam Woohyun, who was sitting beside Kim Myungsoo, started shifting away from the said boy. Heat was starting to emit off Kim Myungsoo and if Nam Woohyun did not move away, he could have melted to a huge puddle of grease that would ensure that the members would have something to grease their pans with for their baking endeavors (if any) for at least 10 years. He tugged Kim Sunggyu’s sleeve and muttered, “Should we escape?”

Before anyone could say anything, Lee Sungyeol threw his tissue into his empty bowl and burped. Standing up with a slight *crack* at the knee, he giggled, “Are you boiling over Myungsoo? Try not to spill all over the floor, or else Sungjong will have such a hard time cleaning up Essence of Myungsoo.”

With a graceful leap, Lee Sungyeol leaps to freedom (over Lee Howon and Lee Sungjong who was still clinging on to Lee Howon) like an antelope on the African Plains and escapes into the comfort of his shared room. Kim Myungsoo on the other hand, stretches himself like a giant feline and smirks, “Run Sungyeol, use your legs well before you lose them.” Kim Myungsoo stands up, brushed invisible dust off his and walked towards the door. His smirk gets wider at the mere thought of how he could get revenge and leaves the posh dormitory without a backward glance. Without wiping his beautiful lips clean of their noodle traces as well.

The next morning, all 6 boys were gathered in their posh living room again, sans Lee Sungyeol. They munched on their assortment of breakfast, not even attempting to engage in small talk. Not a single person spared a glance at the cozy kitchen even when 10CM’s Americano was sung by a voice that resembled a crow. Lee Sungyeol, on the other hand, maintained eye-contact with his beloved coffee maker as it brewed him his daily mug of coffee. He finally leaves the kitchen with a Grande mug of coffee and with a *plop*, seats himself next to Jang Dongwoo. Smiling at nothing in particular, he lifts the mug to allow his deprived lips to taste the bitter beverage that they have been craving for the whole night… …

“Oh my Hogod, why is my coffee salty?!? I don’t put sugar so there is no way that I would have accidentally added salt instead of sugar! And I believe I am smart enough to tell the difference between them! What in the name of Shisus went wrong?!”

Kim Myungsoo snorts into his glass of milk, and 4 pairs of half-awake eyes stared at him. The last pair of Nam Woohyun eyes was crinkled as their owner burst into his famous HAHAHAHA and gasped, “How are you so confident of being able to differentiate sugar and salt Choding? You’re still a kid!” Lee Sungyeol turns his head around to face Kim Myungsoo and stage-whispered dramatically: “You changed my coffee powder didn’t you?”

At this moment, Kim Myungsoo decides, as he takes another sip of his milk, that revenge is indeed sweet.

Or in this particular case, revenge is indeed salty.

 

AN:

Lesson Learnt: Never think that whales beach themselves intentionally; they are not as complicated as human beings to have suicidal thoughts.

Unless there is a whale named Lee Sungyeol.