What is all this that I've done? What does it all mean? There was no point in my actions, or what was in my actions. Because everything only ends up contributing to the worst possible ending; a break up. 

What was going on in my mind? I knew we weren't going to last. All the happy memories...they were all lies. They were all fantasies that only remain in our honeymoon phase. And even with that, our phase was a lot shorter than everyone else's. Atleast, to what I have remembered. 

So maybe I thought love to be too easy, that everything could be fixed with a kiss or a hug. Yes, things can be calmed down with a sweet peck or a passionate embrace, but that's only temporary. After a few hours, we start fighting again. For the stupidest things too. I'll argue that my contribution to this relationship was much more than his, and he'd rebutt me. Then we'd go back and forth with no ending to this topic, because none of us win. We both know. We both know that we aren't contributing to this realtionship as we should. It wasn't like we could help it, we had busy schedules. He's in studio all the time, producing his music. And I spend most of my time infront costumers, trying to sale the latest foundation or eyes shadow that the company came up with. We live in two different worlds even though we live under the same roof. Our minds just doesn't meet. 

If only we had noticed what was going on in our lives and stopped early, I wouldn't be walking down this busy street thinking about all that we've been through. I wouldn't be alone, I wouldn't regret what I just said to him at the cafe. Maybe, I wouldn't have loved him so much.

I don't even know how we ended up together, I really don't. I guess there was just this attraction that both of us had for each other. It wasn't temporary, on my side atleast. My feeings for him are still there, it just got alot harder to be able to show those feelings. To be able to express what I want to tell him. Conflicts were in the way, and I hate it. There are so many things I wanted to do with him but it just never seems to work out. Our opinions clash and we end up ignoring each other for a few hours. 

It wasn't like there wasn't any good times in our relationship, there were a ton. Like that time we went up to Seoul Tower, those little walks we take along the beach, that day I met his mom (she was an aboe sweetheart by the way), when we went to Japan and walked on the streets full of cherry blossom trees....we had lots more memorable times together. I was happy with him, very happy. It just seemed like the bad memories take over sometimes, causing the both of us to forget about all the good times we had together. It's sad. And I wanted to change that, but it really wasn't easy.

Now thinking back, I had aboslolutely no idea why we had a fight just now. He was frustrated with his work and wanted me to come out to have a cup of coffee with him. I said yes, ofcourse, but I'd be running late, since I was still on my shift. It took me a while to be able to get away fom the counter and change into my regular clothes before I headed out. Him, however, was being impatient. Yes, I do understand his frustrations, but he didn't have to yell at me for something that I couldn't control. Considering that I'm working extra shifts lately just to get him that anniversary gift he'd always want, now I don't have to. We no longer will have an anniversary, we no longer will be seeing each other anytime soon. I no longer have to put up with his constant complains and silly arguments that just drives me insane. We ended things roughly, I know. It's better than nothing atleast.

I should be relieved, relieved that I no longer carry the burden of being in a relaitonship. I'm free and with no restrains. I can move out now, and find that little place I've always wanted for my self. I can go shopping without having to come back home getting yelled at for buying too much, because now, no one will yell at me. I don't have to put up with anyone's attitudes nor do I have to watch what I say in the house anymore. I have complete freedom. 

But somehow, I don't feel any better than I did before that meet at the coffee shop. If anything, I feel worse. Just by walking down this street, this street I walked down most nearly everday, it feels different now knowing he won't be next to me in the future. I won't wake up with a 'Good Morning Babe.' or random backhugs here and there when I'm not aware. No one would coo cheesy pick up lines into my ears when I'm upset, and no one will offer me his shouler to sleep on dring long train rides. Most of all, he won't be there for anything anymore. And I can't imagine. 

Maybe I shouldn't have been so harsh to him just now, maybe if I was a little more calm, things won't end up like this. He'd be holding my hand right now, walking me back home before he heads back to the studio. I'd have a hot latte in my hand, because he knows how much I can't stand the cold. We would be talking about that house we've always wanted to have in the future as we walk by our favorite furniture store. There are so many things we can be doing right now if the both of us had been a bit more mature. We would still be together, and happy. 

I suddenly regretted everything that had happened a few minutes ago. I want him to be with me right now. I want him to put his arms around me and call me 'Yoong' in that silly, childlish voice of his. God dammit, his voice. It's the most iest thing I've ever heard. Maybe that's one of the reason I fell for him. For his voice. For his dorkiness. For...him being him. 

Tears started to form as I recall every bits of his characteristics in my mind. Oh how I wish I wasn't this stubborn and could walk back to get him back. To return things back to how it's suppose to be. I should've been more understanding; I knew that the company has been rejecting his songs lately, causing him to constantly have to rewrite what he had wrote for hours. Debating whether to call him or not, I reached into my pockets, hoping to find my phone, only to discover his gloves in the left pocket. His hands must be freezing now.

So, I wasn't sure if I was hallucinating or not, but I see a familiar figure come running towards me. His figure. I seriously thought I was imagining things until he was only inches apart from me. My chest seemed to loosen up a bit seeing him infront of me, panting from the running he just did.

"Yoona...I am so sorry." he said, looking straight into my eyes. "I shouldn't have been so cranky back there at the cafe. After you left...well...I didn't know what happened, but something hit me. I realized how much of a fool I was for being such a bad boyfriend to you and...I can't live without you. Just thinking about a future without you was devastating. I'm really sorry. Please forgive me, Yoong. Please."

The tears that I've been holding back seem to naturually flow down my cheeks as his pleading eyes that shot straight throught my heart. He spoke of every word so intesely and delicately, it was hard not to forgive him. "Taec..." I couldn't make of any words as more tears dripped down my chin. He placed his hand on my cheeks, wiping away the tears with his soft hands. The touch that I've missed.

"No, it was all my fault. You did nothing wrong." I replied, as I re-gain my voice. "I shouldn't even had got mad at you. I know you're stressed out, and I want to help. But I'm so helpless and I hate seeing you so tired...that I just...got angry at the fact that you're always so drained out." I couldn't help but realized the sadness in his eyes, like he was pleading me to stop talking. Before I could react, he pulled me into a tight hug while carressing my hair. "Shhh...I don't like it when you're sad. Especially when you're with me." So his cheesy self was back...I'm glad.

It wasn't until a few minutes had passed that we realize we're in the middle of the street, blocking people's way of going through. He let go of the hug, but grabbed my hand instead. "Let's go home. I rent a few sappy old movies that we can watch until you fall sleep on me." he teased, showing me his extremely wide smile as he do so. I only replied with a scoff, as he knows that I'm not the best at expressing anything.

We slowly walked down the street, and started heading back to our place. The place we both loved and enjoyed as our happily ever after. So maybe there will be bumps on the road of our relationship, but I'm sure this time, our love is stronger than anything. We will still have fights, we will still have diagreements. However, this time, we'll learn to push through those obstacles. We'll learn to tolerate each other and we will try to keep our selves at a calm rate. We will, or we have, learned that being with each other is more important than the little frustrations in our lives. And that we're each other's soul, we're each other's life. 

Our relationship isn't perfect, and so aren't any other. But we know how to cope with the troubles now and we'll strive to become better for each other. Breaking up isn't an answer now, understanding is. Understanding each other is the key point to a successful relationship, and we're willing to do anything to make the times we have together the happiest times of our lives.

Hand in hand, we continue strolling down the street, looking into every window of the stores, talking, laughing, and smiling. There isn't a more enjoyable moment of my life than now.

"Hey, Ok Taecyeon." I called, pulling on to his shoulder so I'd reach his ear. "I love you."

He smiled. "I love you too, Im Yoona."

So that took a super long time to finish. lol
Anyways...I hope you guys liked it and subscribe to more of my stories. I promise I will update more now and maybe even open more oneshots ideas as time goes on.
Stay beautiful everyone! And have a nice day :)