author: jwhong005 / pairings: broken!Kangmin, Kangteuk / written: 20121009 / rating: pg-13 / cr: 1

There was a time when I had been really close to Kim Youngwoon. We were actually lovers at one point as well, lovers that grew up as best friends and later bloomed into a couple that seemed inseparable. That's why when I had suddenly got a phone call to meet him at the movie theatre to hang out, I was thoroughly surprised. I immediately met up with friend Cho Kyuhyun to tell him the good news even. I was just so excited that I'd be able to see him. But at the same time, it didn't make sense. Why was I so happy to see the man that broke my heart in high school?

"What if he hurts you?" Kyuhyun had asked me, hours prior to the meeting time at the theatre in central Seoul.

I just laughed. There was no way that Youngwoon could hurt me. Even though I still felt attachment for my first love, there would be no way that he could possibly hurt me.

Too bad that Kyuhyun happened to be right and I was wrong. Youngwoon was my first and so I never was able to get over him. I, on the other hand, was just a one time fling that lasted less than a year. That my existance still remained in the back of his mind shocks me constantly.

"This is my fiancé, Park Jungsoo." Youngwoon introduced a male of medium stature with dyed brown hair. He looked like Youngwoon's typical type. "Jagiya, this is my ex-boyfriend from high school, Sungmin."

My introduction was nothing specialer than a simple, "This is Sungmin." At least he acknowledged that I was his boyfriend at some point. A part of me is infuriated at myself for believing that a night with Youngwoon could've rekindled our relationship even the slightest bit. I was nothing but a bet to him, a bet that he ended up winning because I gave him my heart. Now, I just wish that he would have given it back.

"Are you sure this is the movie we should see?" Jungsoo asked, eyes wide as he stared at the bold print that labeled the newest horror fillm.

Back then, and even now, horror films remain to be my kryptonite. I hate them. I absolutely hate them albeit Youngwoon never found that out because he loved them so much. It gave me an hour's worth or more of opportunity to cling to him while the time lasted, enjoying his warmth in the dark theatre. If suffering for a measely hour or so of being close to Youngwoon, I was willing to endure a nightmare or two later on.

"Do you not like them?" Youngwoon asked his boyfriend, whom I refuse to refer to as his fiancé, with concern that he never really used with me. "We could see something else."

Would it have been possible that he would have offered the same for me if I spoke up? Probably not. Maybe he even got enjoyment out of me being scared of gruelish monsters and bloody scenes. I wouldn't have pinned Jungsoo as someone afraid of horror films. That wouldn't be the first thing I'd be wrong about. That wouldn't be the first negative thing in my life either.

"What about you Sungmin-sshi?" Jungsoo directed towards me so suddenly that I barely noticed. My hands were clutched inside my sweatshirt's pockets, knuckles probably white from pressure.

I cleared my throat and prepared to answer but Youngwoon did it for me. "He's fine with horror films. We used to see them all the time." He didn't even look at me when he said it. He just simply assumed. I should have told him the truth back then. Seemed that we both were hiding things.

"Two tickets for the nine o'clock Darkened Days showing." Youngwoon said, only getting a ticket for his date, ignoring me. Weakly, I choked back a sob. "Hey, Minnie," he nudged my shoulder to get my attention using the name I dreaded, "you have money for your own admission, don't you?"

"Y-Yeah ..." I replied weakly that I didn't even trust my own feet to walk forward. How I never realized how horrible Youngwoon was before, I would never know.

▬ ✕ 

The movie was horrible and I couldn't even look half the time. I sat beside Youngwoon with refusal to look at him. No matter how much I wanted to, I couldn't bring myself to do so. That would be giving into temptation, something that would make the awkward situation so much worse.

"Do you have a ride home Sungmin-sshi?" Jungsoo asked, grinning at me so nicely that I wanted to smack it off his face.

Instead I gave a weak smile in return. "My flatmate will be coming to get me."

"Still can't drive, huh?" Youngwoon decided to comment, making my heart drop. One of the few things he said to me directly all night was an insult of sorts of course. "Is this flatmate of yours your boyfriend?"

"No," I answered in a solid tone, looking out at the parking lot where I prayed that Kyuhyun would arrive quicker. "And for your information," I added, trying not to snap too much since that wasn't like me at all, "I can drive. My car is in the shop as of now."

Jungsoo let out a sigh and fiddled with the damn diamond ring on his finger, playing with it unintentionally in front of me. "I should probably get going. I have work to attend to tomorrow at the office."

Oh, that's right. Park Jungsoo was, or more correctly, is a doctor in the heart of Seoul, located in one of the busiest hospitals possible. He makes more in a month compared to my year's earnings. Youngwoon deserves someone smart. Jungsoo has the potential for keeping him in line. If I remember correctly Youngwoon believed that a rebellious streak never ends.

"Goodnight," 

Quietly I began to head out to the car parked nearby us, not waiting for a response. Kyuhyun was waiting in the driver's seat, only being able to catch a glance at my ex and his new lover before driving off, giving me the privacy to sob pathetically to myself.

It took three and half months for me to realize that I was in love with Lee Sungmin. Too bad that wasn't a part of the original plan. I was dared by Choi Siwon, a guy who I now view as an jock, to sleep with someone who walked into the room wearing a certain color. Thinking about it, it may have been pink (since he assumed it would be a girl wearing it and I had always been an out of the closet kind of gay) and pink had always been Sungmin's favorite color.

We slept together after our forth month of dating, the deadline of the bet. I had technically won but lost in reality when I saw the look on my little blonde's face once Siwon revealed everything in the middle of lunch. He stood up on a table with a bullhorn and revealed it all.

"Everyone," I remember him saying loud and clear for everyone, "Kim Youngwoon ed Lee Sungmin for a dare. Congratulations buddy, you won!"

The whole cafeteria burst out laughing except for staff, Sungmin and of course myself. Staff went to round up Siwon and take him to the front office while Sungmin sat there devastated, his eyes watering up until all the tears began to spill. We had been sitting next to each other, hands intertwined when the announcement came. Once the words set in, Sungmin pulled his hand away and ran out of the cafeteria, taking nothing with him. Rumors then on came that Sungmin, a nerdy little homoual, slept with Kim Youngwoon, the captain of the wrestling team. It led peers to begin to call him names and it broke my heart.

I couldn't blame him that he stopped talking to me after that.

He may not have known but I payed attention to the little things once I started to secretly call him my little angel. When I took him on dates I liked to go see movies with him, choosing whatever I thought would make his skin crawl so I could protect him, make myself seem strong and make him trust me so I sleep with him later. Little did I know at the time that I would enjoy the warmth he gave me so much that I did it frequently.

My senior year went by with me being single. My little blonde seemed to be everywhere I went, taking all the advance classes that only a kid as smart as him could've taken. It pained me to see him so often but I didn't know what to do. He seemed to hate me.

College came and went when I met Jungsoo. We became good friends and eventually dorm mates our junior year of college. Together we began to rent an apartment and got closer from there. Which is how I learned the whereabouts of the little blonde in my heart.

Sungmin chose to live off campus with some male who had apparently lost his parents at a young age. His name from what I had been told would be Kyuhyun. That male happened to be the same one that picked Sungmin up from the movies that night with me and Jungsoo. I could've been the one to drive him home, maybe even to my apartment if Jungsoo wasn't there.

"Are you happy now?" Jungsoo asked me, tossing off the fake ring I had picked up from a small jewlery shop. 

Sad, I shook my head. "How could I be happy? I've been replaced by someone, haven't I? I can't say that I blame him really. Not after what I did."

"I'm not sure I understand why this fake engagement thing was necessary though." Jungsoo quipped, showing his distaste for the plan like he had in the beginning.

"I did it because," I said, exhaling deeply, "because I wanted to see if he got over me. The way he looked at me tonight was different than the way he had before."

"You broke his heart. How could he look at you the same?" my hyung rolled his eyes, shutting a box firmly with tape. "I guess it's good that we got this over with tonight since you move tomorrow."

Jungsoo stayed in Seoul while I moved a mile or so out of the city. A small café was where I chose to work, encountering none other than Kyuhyun himself, the male that stole Sungmin away from me. If Kyuhyun was there that would mean Sungmin would be close by. I'd be able to get a second chance.