Like a sunflower growing high to reach the sun

Like a sunflower always facing the sun

Like a sunflower blooming in the color of the sun

Like a sunflower, I am only looking at you...

I don’t know since when my life starts circling around you, it’s like you suddenly being my everything, the core of my existence. The way you splash some color into my life is beautiful. I never thought someone like you could turn my world upside down.

Maybe it’s true afterall, that you might be caught by your own words. It’s like karma, in a beautifully twisted way. The day I realized it, I set my eyes on you and I told myself that I will never let you go.

But sometimes, reality doesn’t work as we wished. Reality could offer you your dream to finally come true but dreams come true never as sparkling as it seems. It takes something from you to reach it. And for me, it takes you away.

I never ever once wanted this, but what can I do? So I play the bad character and leave you coldly, just like that... broke you up and leave you in that cafe, hoping that you’ll hate me because of that so it wouldn’t be that hard for you to move on.

But the muffled sound of you trying desperately holding back your tears but failing miserably was something I could never forget. Maybe you don’t realize, but at that time my heart also broke into pieces. I feel numb after leaving you that day. Everything I do was a blur, I can’t function properly. I’m starting to think will you be okay, will us be okay?

I could just ask my step sister about you, she’s your bestfriend and still your bestfriend right? But I don’t. I’m afraid she would tell you and I don’t want to cross your life again, I want you to move on, so when the day we meet again finally comes, I can see you smiling happily showing me that you’re okay even without me. Not like the last time I met you.

But when the day comes, it was a really unexpected meeting for me. At that time I also became not sure if I’m ready to let you go entirely, to see you with another man. But that’s what happened, right? I don’t know how you and my older group mate could end up being with each other, I mean I thought you like cool and good-looking smart guys like me but he’s just the opposite of me. He’s the funny type, a childish one—I could say he’s a bit immature. Yea he’s nice and soft hearted—I know that—and he is consistent with his words, his life principle but he’s a bit dumb in some aspects. I’m not saying he’s stupid, he’s just too innocent in some ways, wait... no, scratch that, maybe because some part of his brain stuck in his 5 years old mode that’s why he’s so easy to be picked on—no, he definitely not innocent. I know how many s he watched and I always wonder if you know about that. See? Your type has changed so much. I thought you like a-bit-serious-but-cute type, someone like me! But you end up with that Mania -_- life is hard, I know.

Well, I guess that’s why they say people changes and so do things. Even though I still can’t move on from you yet, I can say that I’m glad you’re with him now. At least I know what kind of man he is and even though he is like that, I know he’s a good man and it helps me accept your relationship. Actually, I don’t want to admit this, but I know you can trust him and I know he won’t hurt you like I did.

But if one day things happen to change, if he ever hurt you, you know I’m still here. I’m not going anywhere and you can always come to my side. You know I will never turn my back on you, because I am your sunflower. And like a sunflower watching the sun appear and disappear, I’m always watching you from afar, following your steps in happiness and sadness.

Because I am a sunflower, looking over at you.