Hyukjae settles himself on the mattress.

He feels tiredness weighing his eyes and the muscles of his body, but his mind is still lucid enough to keep him awake.

He remains with his eyes closed. A few more minutes persisting and he should finally fall asleep.

A movement made by another body on the bed, however, distracts him slightly. He half-opens his eyes and sees Donghae bringing himself closer.

"Can't sleep?" Donghae asks quietly, sleepily, but considering the time he's been lying down and is still awake, Hyukjae presumes that he's also struggling to rest.

Hyukjae softly sighs through his nose and shakes his head.

"Something on your mind?"

"No," he answers honestly. "Just taking a while to get to sleep."

"Me too," Donghae says through a yawn, confirming Hyukjae’s thoughts. "Shall we talk until then?" he makes the recurring proposal, bringing one of his hands to rest on Hyukjae's waist gently.

Despite doing this little ritual countless times, Hyukjae finds it gracious the way Donghae asks him every single time—although he often convinces Hyukjae to do so, even when he's not in the mood for late-night conversations.

"Okay," Hyukjae smiles lazily, caressing Donghae's arm. "What do you want to talk about?"

"I don't know..."

A short silence ensues as Donghae mentally searches for a topic. The room is dark, but not entirely. Hyukjae sees enough of his face and his thoughtful expression.

When his schedule was done for the day, he went straight to Donghae's apartment—it’s friday and they’d arranged for Hyukjae to spend the night. And after eating lots of jajangmyeon and watching a rom-com movie cuddled up on the couch, in front of the beautiful night view from the huge windows of Donghae’s living room, at 23:15 weariness and uncontrollable yawning made their presence.

So, after brushing their teeth and lying in bed, it seemed guaranteed they would be fast asleep within just a few minutes. But now, past midnight, they still find themselves awake and killing time until sleep definitely arrives.

"Hmm... When are you going back to your family's house?" Donghae asks. Any random question always helps to strike a conversation, he usually says.

"Next sunday, maybe," Hyukjae replies after thinking briefly. "And your mother, how is she?"

"She’s alright. I visited her last week. And she called me today too. Wants to know when you're going to visit her again."

Hyukjae rests an arm over Donghae's shoulder in a loose embrace as Donghae hugs his waist. "Tell her I promise I’ll come along when you go back there."

"She always misses you. She asks about you more than me and Donghwa," Donghae smiles, clearly amused and without any hurt in his speech.

"My mom ditto. They're all the same."

Donghae agrees with a nod, enjoying a caress on the back of his neck.

"They’re funny,” he continues, merging one topic into another. “Sometimes she forgets about one of us or what we say to her. Another day, on a saturday, she asked if I knew where my brother was. Even though he told her several times that he’d go out that night and come back late."

Hyukjae chuckles softly. "And where did he go?"

"A wedding," he replies. "Of one of his friends from the army, I think. I don't know who it is, but he said the ceremony was pretty amazing."

"Oh, that's cool. I haven't been to a wedding in a while."

"Yeah."

A brief silence one more time. Donghae contemplates for a moment, while Hyukjae’s hand moves to gently fondle his hair.

Then, he speaks again.

"I want to attend a wedding,” He hesitates. “But not... someone else's..."

His voice is low, almost a whisper, as if telling a secret. A veiled confession that Hyukjae’s heard more than once and didn't need much more to understand.

A fond smile immediately takes over Hyukjae’s face.

"Oh... Thinking about it again?"

"I think often..." Donghae says almost shyly, meeting Hyukjae's gaze again after a few seconds. "Don’t you?"

"Of course I do," Hyukjae assures, his restless fingers now lightly caressing his cheekbone.

"What do you imagine?"

Even in the dark, Hyukjae can see an adorable glint of excitement in Donghae's eyes. It isn't the first time they have this conversation, but the subject, while delicate, prompts a good feeling that they like to relive from time to time. Just thinking about the possibility, having the perspective that it could happen one day, brings comfort—even though, sometimes, it seems like a distant and unreachable dream.

Imagining it brings a little tranquility to two anxious hearts and an uncertain reality.

"Don't you remember what I said last time?"

"I remember a little. But I like to hear you describe it. You can say it a thousand times and I'll always love to listen to it."

It's Hyukjae's turn to feel a slight shyness amid a smile. Relieved by the dimly lit room that masks the sheepish look and the heat on his cheeks (despite knowing that Donghae can read all of his emotions even in the darkness), he clears his throat before speaking again.

"Okay... Well, a beach ceremony, you know. I always picture that."

Donghae nods his head, staring at him and waiting for more, as if anticipating his favorite scene from an incredible movie he's seen many times.

"In spring. Not too hot, nor too cold. Near sunset time."

"You and me in white, but not in a traditional suit," Donghae completes, quoting what Hyukjae himself had told him a while ago.

"Yes. There has to be some personality, some style. We're not conventional," Hyukjae says playfully, regaining his humorous attitude, making Donghae laugh. The conversation seems to be helping more to ward off sleep than attract it, but Donghae doesn't care. The shared fantasy is too thrilling to be interrupted by anything right now.

Donghae’s eyes widen slightly when something crosses his mind. "You could put on something sparkly, like that light pink outfit you wore in ‘Be’... Oh, you looked so freaki