PROLOGUE

After a series of chicane turns, the breeze of the sea welcomed this loner. Believe it or not, it was his first time stepping outside of Seoul, leaving his comfort zone, embracing the new world people used to be proud of. This was his spiritual journey to conquer his timidness, trying to achieve a certain height of confidence.

Almost all the people on the bus were sleeping while he couldn’t even close his eyes due to his anxiety and a little bit of excitement. Typically a first-timer, worried about everything, anxious about anything.

All that, for what? 

There was someone out there, someone he couldn’t speak to. One day, maybe after that journey, he could tell her for the first time, and talk to her for the first time, as himself, purely himself. 

Feeling peace and freedom, all he could think was her face, wondering what she was up to today. Out of the blue, he wanted to call her. Still, even though he missed her so badly, he couldn’t bring himself to make a video call.

His heart tried to jump out of his chest. He didn’t know whether want his call to be picked up or not. God smiled upon him and granted his deepest wish, the call was picked.

“Hello, Jennie here.”

“...” that voice was lovely but too bad, he couldn’t say anything, at all.

“Hello? Anyone there?”

Next time, he thought. Thus, he thought of something else. He opened the window and let his phone out. The sound of waves replaced his voice to tell the tale.

 

#01 WALL OF WONDER

Descend. Landed. Stopped. Finally, she reached her homeland. From the arrival gate, Jennie came out with her cute red suitcase. Under the randomness of the weather, lining taxis and drivers. One of them stood out and if there was a martial art of talking, this one was probably a grandmaster, he was very persuasive. Jennie’s intention to call for an online taxi was canceled out by that driver’s aggressiveness.

The sky was quite dark. Had been like that for a while but it never rained. That dark cloud looked fluffy, even though it also looked so emo. It reminded her of her best friend who left her to study in Australia, Chaeyoung. The beginning of that story was bitter and the look of the sky made Jennie’s mood freefall.

Unfortunately, she wasn’t as lucky as Chaeyoung. Jennie loved photography and Rose loved to paint. Sharing the wish to attend a university that had both programs, but only one of them made it. That was the exposition of the plot.

Deep inside her heart, Jennie often saw herself as superior to Chaeyoung in terms of intelligence. Well, her scores during her high school heyday were totally beating her best friend to the pulp. Jennie used to feel that way and when Chaeyoung happened to be accepted into the university she dreamed of, it hurt her pride.

Alternatively, she could attend another university with a photography program in Australia, but her pride blocked that kind of option. There is no other school than that place, she thought. 

That foolish pride made her shameless. She said to Chaeyoung that she planned to enter a photography program at Yonsei University and Jennie asked her to attend Yonsei together. Chaeyoung worked hard so she could be accepted into that university when she knew she wasn't that bright doing the test and Jennie basically asked her to let it go. Chaeyoung felt no confidence she could be accepted so she kindly refused Jennie’s plan.

Feeling betrayed, Jennie felt anger and vent it to Chaeyoung. They didn’t talk for a very long time. Began with ghosting and then they actually started to grow apart. Jennie ignored Chaeyeoung’s messages and calls, didn’t give her a chance to apologize even though she wasn't at the fault here. In the end, Jennie didn’t spend Chaeyoung’s last days in Korea and even saw her on the last day when she departed.

Pride. A poison that destroyed their friendship. Jennie already accepted that she was the foolish one and she should apologize to Chaeyoung but that damn pride, again. In all her life, Jennie, the confident girl, rarely apologize and maybe that was why she had so few friends. Having Chaeyoung since she was a kid was enough but now she was gone too.

All she could do was stalk her Instagram, looking at her daily life as a freshman in the art department. So many friends around her–Jennie was jealous. She seemed fine without her–Chaeyoung made a lot more friends compared to when she was with Jennie. For months, Jennie actually felt depressed, living her freshman year gloomy.

“Where should I take you?”

The taxi driver broke Jennie from her reminiscing.

“Yonsei University, please,” sweetly she said.

Yes. Everything had turned good since Jennie started her freshman year. There was a newly opened cafe. It was a unique one because, inside the cafe, there was an empty wall provided by the owner for the customers to pin messages; it was like an SNS where other people could read it. That gimmick was quite an old school but it became quite a trend. They wrote and pinned complaints of life, romance stories, campus gossip, poetry, etc.

Even though she was gloomy because of Chaeyoung’s problem, she tried to live her life as a newcomer, blending with her classmates, trying to make friends. Well, she tried quite hard. Ever since Chaeyoung left, she realized she had almost no friends. Sadly, Jennie became more friendly after her friend was gone.

Her gang often visited the cafe and one day she saw, among the various sizes of papers that were pinned on the wall, an inside-out ramyeon wrapper. It was very noticeable among them, pinned on the right side of the wall. A haiku by a person called Tinta, titled Middle Plan.

Through mountain to sea.

Blue nil, green bloom, by beauty.

All my steps stop here.

Jennie wasn't really adept at haiku but she felt intrigued. By her interpretation, the writer wanted to go to sea and he went through a mountain to get there. But then, he fell in love with the beauty of the green or the beauty of the mountain. Even though he didn’t plan to stay or maybe take a vacation there and while his initial destination was the sea, impulsively he chose to stay in the mountains. 

“Ah, that’s why it's called Middle Plan? I guess it teaches about the unexpected part of life. Well, there are people like that too. They planned to go on vacation but it never happened but an impulsive vacation happened easily,” she murmured at the wrapper.

Somehow, it was as if the haiku was written specifically for her. She always planned to visit Chaeyoung so many times but she couldn’t find the courage. Reading that haiku made her think something ridiculous and maybe it would work.

“I’m sorry, guys. I need to go,” Jennie said in a hurry.

“Where are you going?” One of her friends looked worried because looked weird.

“Me? Australia.”

“Now? So suddenly?”

“Yes. Bye. See you later.”

“Hey! Wait! Don’t you have a presentation tomorrow?”

“ that!”

She went straight to her home and took her passport. While packing, she booked the earliest flight that would happen in 3 hours so she packed lightly, taking whatever clothes fit in, carelessly. Her mother was shocked when Jennie called and told her she was on her way to the airport. 

Never crossed her mind that just 3 hours ago, she was just hanging out with her friends and now she was on the flight to Australia to meet Chaeyoung. She tried her best to not think at all. Would my money be enough? Would everything be okay? By the way, where does Chaeyoung live?”Jennie took it as if Chaeyoung was in a life-threatening situation so she didn’t consider anything else. 

Since she was already on her way there, Jennie couldn’t back off. The ticket was quite expensive and she probably couldn’t return without asking for money from her mother. Jennie specifically set it as a suicide mission so she was forced to do her best.

When she arrived there, she bought a local sim card and after activating the internet service, she texted Chaeyoung that she was at the airport. Chaeyoung replied, asking what she did there, with whom, and so many questions but Jennie didn’t answer. She was busy thinking about the scenario where she apologized.

Apparently, she didn’t need any plan because when she finally met Chaeyoung at the airport, everything melted away. They hugged and without uttering a word they forgot everything that made them grow apart.

Chaeyoung was shocked that Jennie was in Australia and she would be more shocked if she knew that Jennie could repeat that semester because of what she had just done.

A smile emerged on Jennie’s face when she remembered that suicide visit. She smirked alone in that taxi, thinking about the efforts she needed to lobby her professors.

On her lap, there was a bread wrapper and a marker. She was thinking about a haiku to send to Tinta. After she visited Australia back then, Jennie felt grateful to Tinta. She didn't know who he was so she wrote a haiku for the first time for him as her token of gratitude.

The garbage tells tales.

The silent gold speaks brightly.

Seems like the world moves.

A haiku titled Ramyun Gives Wing, a random and quite disconnected title by Pena. Jennie looked up on Naver and Tinta meant ink in Indonesian. So, to match him, Jennie chose the name Pena which basically meant pen. Ink and Pen… What harmony.

That first haiku was written on an orange box she got from Chaeyoung when she visited Australia and they bought a box of oranges–because Chaeyoung craved it. Jennie then pinned a part of the box where she wrote the haiku and pinned it on the wall next to Tinta’s ramyun.

Something unexpected happened. On the next day, when Jennie visited the cafe with her clique, she found a white sock full of holes pinned next to her haiku. It was messy but there was haiku written on it, a reply!

If gold is too bright,

How can you see the value?

Mirror is better.

“Is it his way to tell me that everything worked out because of myself?” Jennie looked so enlightened staring at Tinta’s writing. She then went and grabbed a broken pencil that her friend literally just broke. She then wrote her haiku in small font to fit the pencil. Her friends were watching her but she didn’t care.

Mirror is angel.

Tells me lies, told me kind things.

Which both come from you.

Jennie set two pins to align horizontally on the wall. Then she put the pencil on it as if it was an exhibition item. Since that day, Jennie exchanged haikus with that mysterious person. It was sure exciting. She felt she was a scholar exchanging poems with other scholars like in the historical drama. Jennie never asked his identity. The mystery part of his identity made the thing excited.

People started to notice Jennie's and Tinta’s garbage but it turned out good rather than bad. The haiku exchange was quite entertaining for other people. Pena or Jennie became famous because she openly pinned her haiku. While Jennie’s identity as Pena was easily exposed, people never know who was Tinta.

Without her realized, Jennie became a campus celebrity. She made so many new friends because of her new status. Also, people who wanted to pin their message were now using cleaned garbage just like Pena and Tinta. On the wall, now there was so much garbage like a bike exhaust, phone case, ex-boyfriend photo, etc. It became a wall of wonder and Jennie took pride in it.

“Huft~ it was easy in the past,” Jennie still couldn’t write anything on her bread wrapper. Now was her senior year and she never stopped exchanging haiku with Tinta. She always tried to reply as fast as she could but not lately.

Jennie couldn’t write anything at all. It had been three weeks since her last reply. She thought she had an art block so she visited Chaeyoung again to refresh her mind but seemed like it didn’t work. What happened exactly?

“We are here,” without her realizing it, she arrived at the cafe near Yonsei where the wonder wall exist but she didn’t have anything to pin there. “I’m sorry I couldn’t bring it closer because it’s crowded there. You need to cross the road. Is that okay?”

“Y-yeah. No biggie. I’m just making a quick visit. Can you wait for me?”

“Sure. Don’t worry. Your bag is safe with me.”

“Thank you, sir.”

Fortunately, it’s a small road and cars rarely passed there. When Jennie crossed, suddenly her vision became all white but after blinking her vision returned. It happened quite a few times already and she thought she should see a doctor but that was a problem for later. All she could think now was the wall.

When she entered the wall, some regulars greeted her. They knew who she was. Shyly, she crossed the sea of people and went straight to the wall. Her heart was beating hard and uncontrollable. Jennie knew the reason. As she spent time with Tinta, she grew fond of him even when she didn’t know his identity. Tinta had become a part of her life, a precious one on top of that. Thus, she thought, maybe the reason why she couldn’t write anything was that she didn’t want to write anything hypocritical.

Jennie realized that deep inside, she was still a selfish person. She didn’t know his circumstance and she was the one who started that haiku relationship. At that time, she wanted to write as a woman who was in love.

No cryptic.

Pure from the heart.

So, Jennie took a napkin and wrote a clause on it. Then, she pinned it in the middle of the wall, on top of one of her old haiku. It was quite stand out because when everybody tried to use garbage, Jennie used a clean napkin.

TO WHOM I CAN’T SPEAK TO, I WANT TO SPEAK 

-PENA-

That’s it, he screamed in her mind. Jennie felt like a little girl who just confessed to her crush. People were staring at her. They were probably curious about what she wrote. Feeling shy, she escaped the cafe before they could read it. She power walked fast with a fluttering heart. The expectation was exceptionally high for her thinking about the future.

But, that excitement made her careless. There was a mini-truck coming from the South. Jennie didn’t realize it due to her excitement. In the end, the crash happened. Jennie was hit. She went unconscious.

[TO BE CONTINUED]