To heal.

 

It was Chaeyoung’s main reason to why she wants to travel the world after gaining the courage and money from all the hardwork and trauma she had been in her entire life.

 

She will admit that it was a rough phase and it took her a long time for her to be that stable and to stand on her own pair of feet, but she knows she’s not fully settled with herself yet and so she finds some ways for her to eventually get back to the Chaeyoung her family met and get used to her and to the Chaeyoung she wants her to be.

 

It was quite blurry—what she imagines herself without all her past experiences that made her the worst version of herself and without all the complications and flaws she has, but she has the goal of accepting it all because after all, she’s not the Chaeyoung who gained courage to face the world without all of those.

 

As she messily writes down her itinerary for the next years to come as she already saved up a lot of money that can make her live for about 4 years without the help of others, she still keeps on ending up with asking herself about what really is her purpose in life.

 

Does she want to be a traveler who writes blogs about the places she has been?

 

Does she want to study every culture the country has once she step foot in those places?

 

Does she want to keep on traveling until she discover what she really want in life?

 

Is she meant for traveling or is she just pushing herself so she will get distracted with the harshness of life—that she’s actually alone and has no one beside her?

 

Is she meant to just fulfill her childhood dream of becoming a known artist around the world?

 

Is she meant for all the things the ed up her life just so she can be stronger and prepare herself for a lot more to come in the future?

 

She doesn’t know all the answers to those questions, or she just buried it all deep down and doesn’t want to admit that she knows how to answer everything, just denying it.
 

When she eventually landed to her first destination with her passport in hand and her luggage on the other, she took a deep sigh before checking in her hotel and went to the nearest coffee shop to ease her jet lag.

 

The first sip of coffee after hours of plane ride was an unfamiliar feeling for Chaeyoung, but she learned to gradually love it as her eyes laid on the gorgeous girl sitting on the next table across her while writing in her journal as she waits for her coffee to be served and a downpour of rain started that made the whole place and that whole moment sentimental.

 

It was quite a perfect scene she thinks that went out straight from a fictional book she came across a bookstore downtown her house in her own country.

 

The rain makes her feel that she’s alive once again and she didn’t notice that there’s already a smile forming on her lips as she still stare at the girl, hoping she doesn’t look like a creep because it’s not her intention to look like that.

 

She doesn’t exactly know what is happening to her, but she feels a tingling feeling inside of her—she doesn’t even know if she is allowed to call her joy of some sort or feeling giddy or is it really the feeling of being alive and being able to feel anything, except pain, regret, and everything connected to that?

 

She’s unfamiliar with the feeling and she’s just staring at the girl, but why does she want to do something more than just staring and admiring her physical appearance? The way her pinky automatically goes up when she sips at her now served coffee and the way her eye smile as she write more words in her journal made Chaeyoung’s world brighter.

 

Is she even allowed to describe it like that? In that moment alone, she can see fireworks, amidst the downpour, and she doesn’t know if she’s thinking weird of her surroundings already or is it because of the iced Americano she ordered that gives her palpitation and bizarre thoughts.

 

As she keeps on letting herself get drown with her own thoughts, Chaeyoung declared that she wants that stranger to keep filling the pages of her story and write it with her as she bravely went to her own table and totally startled the girl.

 

“Hi. I’m sorry for bothering you, but can I sit here? My eye caught you for a while, so I didn’t stop myself and approached you”

 

Nervousness was evident in the girl’s eyes and Chaeyoung mentally hit herself because she should not make any decisions that fast, particularly if it involves anything or anyone around her.

 

It looks like the girl has no choice because she just nodded as she immediately put her journal and pen back to her bag and scroll aggressively in her phone while sipping on her coffee.

 

Chaeyoung feels so bad about that sudden approach when she just got out of her comfort zone and wants a friend from that unfamiliar country.

 

“Sorry for making you uncomfortable all of a sudden, I’ll go first so you can continue—“

 

“No, wait!”

 

It sure was surprising to hear her voice for the first time as if Chaeyoung was already in heaven and so she put her cup back to the table and arranged the way she sit.

 

“My name is Chaeyoung, 23 years old, doing anything I want in life and ended up in Amsterdam as my first itinerary while I travel the world. How about you?”

 

The girl is certainly overwhelmed with what Chaeyoung did right after that scenario and all she could do was giggle because why does she feel like she just went abroad for a blind date when she’s there for another reason?

 

“Oh. I’m really sorry again for blatantly saying those things. Just forget it and continue with what you’re doing until you finish your drink”

 

“You’re funny, Chaeyoung”

 

They gradually feel the comfort in the atmosphere as the rain died down and they can also see the mist and drizzle from the shop’s window.

 

“Anyway, the name’s Mina, 25 years old, does dancing for fun and I have a training to attend that’s why I’m here in Amsterdam”

 

“That’s cool. So what genre of dance are you up to?”

 

“I’ve been a ballerina since pre-school.”

 

“That’s so amazing of you. You probably love ballet, don’t you?”

 

“Yeah. I believe it is my first love and it would be my only and last love”

 

They talk a little bit more as they enjoy each other’s company and the best coffee they had so far in their entire life, among all the coffee they tasted from different parts of the world they came from.

 

It was a nice conversation, actually. Chaeyoung never thought she would be that comfortable sharing something about herself to a mere stranger, even being that eager listener to someone she barely knew, but why does she feel like everything will be okay whenever Mina glances at her with such sparkling eyes and giving her an adorable gummy smile while talking about her favorite milk shake in Texas or her favorite stuffed toy that she has ever since she was a kid and she still goes to bed with that toy.

 

Everything glows whenever Mina smiles at her and she’s already afraid to lose that spark and light once that moment ends and they need to part ways as they are just strangers who are in Amsterdam to do different things with different purposes.

 

To say that Amsterdam was beautiful might be underrated. Her first destination for her personal project of finding herself already gives the healing she keeps on finding in her whole life and she just thinks that she’s going to the right way and being on the right path.

 

She finds herself smiling once again with a memory of Mina’s wonderful gummy smile when she’s packing all her things as she’s moving to her next destination.

 

While she’s on the plane, though, off to another plenty of hours hundred kilometers above the air, thoughts started attacking her once again and was bothered by all of it that made her wide awake in her whole journey going to Quebec.

 

She started questioning herself once again if she really deserves to be happy and to live her life to the fullest like what she currently does, if she really deserve those kind treatment everyone gives her in her whole journey so far, and if she really deserves all the good things that is happening in her life.

 

The last thing she knew was she’s smiling because of a certain someone, but why it was immediately turned into blaming herself once again with what happened in her whole family?

 

What does she do that triggers her to be in that kind of state when she’s starting her journey to the betterment of herself?

 

What happened to the braveness she once built to be able to fulfill her goal?

 

There’s no tears falling down from her eyes, but it looks so sad and guilty.

 

She has been eaten by the blaming thoughts again and worst is that she doesn’t clearly know how to stop herself from doing that in the middle of the air, with no one to help her and she’s way too uncomfortable to approach someone because she’s in the middle of the plane ride.

 

She tried to close her eyes and keep taking deep breaths, reminding herself that she’s in the present and keep on doing some reality check as she slowly open her eyes and feel her surroundings.

 

There’s a man in his 20s wearing a green suit. The skies are blue and clear. The flight attendants were nice. She just had a ham sandwich. Edward Scissorhands is currently playing in the monitor. She just heard Claude Debussy’s Nocturnes. She is currently wearing her favorite black Justin Bieber shirt. She’s on her way to Quebec, Canada.

 

“Chaeyoung, you’re alive. You’re here—existing and breathing.”

 

She sighed as she calms down after minutes of being in that worst state. She then looked at her right side and saw that they are still up above the cloud that means her flight is not over yet.

 

She just keeps on wishing that everything will be alright for her.

 

Once she eventually landed in Canada, she instantly went to the hotel she already booked and let her body rest from another jet lag.

 

She planned to stay longer in the place because she discovered that it makes her feel haggard and in a hurry if she will stay in a place for about 3 weeks when she can just stay for exactly a month.

 

She didn’t even bother to change her clothes nor unpack her luggage as she just take off her shoes and hide in the big white sheets of the bed and dozed off.

 

When she woke up 13 minutes after 7 in the evening, she instantly felt hungry and thought of just having a room service because she’s too tired to discover a lot of restaurants in the country she can visit.

 

She ordered some poutine and Canadian pizza she has been meaning to eat after seeing an advertisement online and it looks so appetizing in her eyes.

 

Quebec immediately didn’t fail her with their food as it’s just right for her taste and she enjoyed her dinner with some cola to finish her meal.

 

The itinerary she has for her whole stay gives her a lot of free time and so a week after her arrival, she went to Dufferin Terrace to have a photo walk with herself.

 

The whole place was nice to begin with. She finds peace in it and literally gives her a peace of mind as it’s not a sort of a crowded place because it’s not yet the peak season.

 

She enjoyed taking a lot of photos of different sceneries as well as random people enjoying the place, may it be the locals or tourists.

 

When she saw a restaurant nearby, she decided to dine in and rest for a while before she went on her day.

 

She was scanning for some vacant table as it’s already near lunch when she spotted a familiar when she never knew she will meet again.

 

“Hi, Miss. Is this seat taken?”

 

Chaeyoung fully saw the girl’s face and confirmed that it is indeed the girl she didn’t expect to see in that place.

 

“Mina?”

 

“Eh?”

 

“I’m Chaeyoung. We met in Amsterdam last month at some coffee shop when it was raining and I suddenly approached you. Like this.”

 

People then started piling up the restaurant and so the girl just let Chaeyoung sit across her as she waits for her food.

 

Moments later, after Chaeyoung ordered her own meal, the girl stared at her once again, as if recalling where did she exactly saw the girl in front of her.

 

“It was in Amsterdam, right? Where I had a dance training?”

 

“Yeah. You mentioned that you went there for a training and I can also remember that you were a ballerina since pre-school.”

 

“Right. The funny Chaeyoung. I remember now”

 

Their giggles surrounded the atmosphere that immediately made the both of them comfortable as their food was both served and they dig in right after.

 

“Wow.”

 

They had the same initial reaction after tasting their respective meals and they can both say that Quebec really doesn’t fail them when it comes to their food.

 

“By the way, you really look good with your blonde hair, Mina”

 

“Thanks. Colored it for a change, but I’m not ready yet for a haircut, so this will do for now”

 

Chaeyoung laughed with her now ash blue shoulder-length hair that was a bob cut with bangs just last month.

 

“I was actually surprised to see you here, Mina. What a coincidence, I guess?”

 

“I know, right? It’s totally a different country, yet we manage to meet again. What are the odds?”

 

After they finished their meal, they decided to stroll for a while around the place and Chaeyoung just had an amazing idea.

 

“Mina, if you don’t mind, can you be my muse for today? I was having a photo walk a while ago, but I personally think it would be great if I have a fixed subject. If you’re not busy, of course”

 

“Certainly not. I would love to be your muse for today”

 

It immediately gave a bright smile to Chaeyoung’s face and they then started taking some photos as Chaeyoung doesn’t need to instruct Mina to do some poses anymore because the girl already knows her best angle and how well she will blend with the place.

 

“Are you a model of some sort? It seems like whenever we stop for some photos you already know what to do”

 

“No. It’s natural, I guess. Particularly because you’re the photographer?”

 

Soft giggles came and Chaeyoung can feel how hot her cheeks were that made her panic and just look at her own camera, pretending to browse some photos or pointing it to the scenery to look for a better angle just so Mina will stop teasing her.

 

Sunset came and they eventually finished their photo walk with the beauty of the nature and admired every bit of it.

 

“It was nice meeting you for the second time, Mina”

 

The night right after the photo walk, Chaeyoung could definitely say that she has a blast that day because she just had a wonderful meal and the whole Dufferin Terrace moment was one-of-a-kind and will certainly remain with her as one of the best that happened to her in Quebec.

 

As she transfer all the photos she got for the whole day to a folder in her laptop because she decided to edit some and send it to Mina when she has the chance to, she started asking herself if she still has a bright future and something she could look forward to.

 

Seeing Mina’s gummy smile and her wonderful appearance from her own camera gives her a little bit of hope that everything will be okay in no time.

 

It is as if Mina’s existence to her means that she brings joy and hope to people she encounter in different circumstances and Chaeyoung just like the fact that she already met her twice, that means that she might be having a bit more of hope about everything in general.

 

The moon was shining brightly that night and Chaeyoung just thinks that it can be bright as her future.

 

As she edits Mina’s medium shot photo, showcasing the beauty of her side profile with her beauty marks emphasized, Chaeyoung just realized she definitely now has something to look forward to and it is to make a certain someone smile and to keep on meeting that person in every chance she can get and she will surely grab no matter when and where it will be.

 

Bright future might be a big house and lot, a bunch of expensive cars, clothes, and accessories, or a lot of food, groceries for others, but for Chaeyoung, bright future can also be having a clear goal in life and being able to achieve it through hardwork and dedication, as well as a solid inspiration and motivation.

 

Chaeyoung’s choice of 3^rd country to visit in her personal project might be too romantic for her own liking but it has also been her dream of visiting it, amidst all the cliché reasons to why they want to go there.

 

However, Chaeyoung can still prove that it is indeed worthy to stay there for a month, even if she’s single because of the indulgence the place gives and the aesthetic, of course. And who wouldn’t want to go there when their culture is so rich and Chaeyoung certainly loves the whole art it offers.

 

“Do you, perhaps, believe in fate?”

 

Chaeyoung was absolutely startled when a familiar sweet voice suddenly asked her an absurd question, but what makes her more startled is that she’s indeed familiar with the voice and she’s immediately starting to think that the question is not absurd anymore because it makes sense.

 

“Look, we meet again for the third time and all of the places, we met here again, on the city of love, as they say”

 

The tease is evident in the person’s voice and Chaeyoung can feel the sparks again tingling in her own system and if she can’t stop herself from that moment enough, she might do something out of her comfort zone again.

 

“Hello, Chaeyoung. It’s nice to see you again”

 

“Mina”

 

Their eyes locked instantly and that’s when Chaeyoung felt a lot more sparks inside of her and she’s immediately afraid of what it would be because they’re in Paris, another country that is part of her itinerary, yet Mina was there once again and if someone will ask her again if she believes in fate, she might aggressively nod and say yes with some supporting details because what really are the odds of meeting a mere stranger for three times already in different countries and they still remember your name and what you look like?

 

Chaeyoung slowly believes that fate is bringing them together.

 

She was actually not in the mood that day because some negative thoughts attacked her again and so Mina respected her initial reaction when she saw her, however, offered her ears and shoulder if Chaeyoung is comfortable enough to lessen whatever she is feeling.

 

And of course, who is Chaeyoung to say no to a pretty girl who has a kind heart and looks like an angel? She grabbed the opportunity as she volunteered to treat Mina an early dinner at one of the Eiffel Tower restaurants as they both enjoy the magnificent sunset from that view.

 

“Oh, how nice this would be. I totally agree that this place is called the city of love because it indeed has a romantic atmosphere, even if you don’t have a partner.”

 

They enjoyed their full course meal first and Mina hasn’t stopped thanking Chaeyoung since then because she knows how expensive the food is and even if she have to admit that she can afford those meals already, she is still grateful with the kind gesture Chaeyoung offered her because they literally didn’t know each other, except their name, age, and what they do in life. Besides, it’s just their third time meeting without anything attached.

 

“So, if you’re eventually ready. You can now start telling me anything you want. It will always be safe with me and it will not go anywhere, Chaengie”

 

The nickname is foreign but it rests comfortably in Chaeyoung’s heart in just a flash.

 

“I don’t know where to start, but I guess with this fact… I’m already an orphan, Mina”

 

The pity in Mina’s eyes was evident and Chaeyoung just gave her an assuring smile.

 

“My brother and my parents were caught in an accident when I was in grade school, participating in a camp. They were supposed to bring the things I forgot to bring when it all happened. My auntie and uncle were the only ones I can call my family not until they had their own child when I was in high school so I made my own decision to just live alone and have a lot of jobs to sustain my own education and place. It was really hard, if you’ll ask me. I don’t have the time to mourn and be weak because I need to provide for myself, even if I don’t exactly know the reason why am I still moving forward in life when I don’t have anyone beside me anymore. I’ve been in a really bad state and keep on blaming myself for what happened to them because if not for me, then our car wouldn’t be crashed in half and my family wouldn’t be death on arrival. Years after graduating college with flying colors and praises from my professors, I’m here breathing, but not feeling my soul at all. I still don’t know what do in life, that’s why when we first met I just said that I was just doing anything I want in life.”

 

The girl then looked at the view in front of them. Admiring the pretty orange and pink skies as everyone around them looks so lovely and enjoying in their own little world. Oh, how Chaeyoung wishes life would be easy, just like that.

 

“I still don’t know what to do in life, really. Through traveling, I’m hoping I could get back the Chaeyoung my family used to see when they were still here and I’m also hoping that I could discover a lot more about myself that can help me know my purpose in life.”

 

“Chaeyoung, you’re really a nice person and I could tell you’re an amazing one.”

 

“Thank you for that. It’s the first time I heard someone say that to me wholeheartedly and not because I was at the top of the class or they pity me when they knew I’m an orphan”

 

“Well, I also admire you for being so strong in more than a decade and not giving up despite all the struggles that you’ve been through. You’re your own hero”

 

“Thank you for listening to my story, Mina. And I’m sorry for bothering you from your busy schedule.”

 

“Hey, you don’t have to worry about it. Besides, it’s our free time from our seminar. I’m just so glad to find you here. It feels like I keep on remembering and want to keep on seeing you everywhere in the world.”

 

“Silly”

 

A moment of comfortable silence before Mina looked at Chaeyoung with such solemn eyes and the latter can feel that she has something serious to say.

 

“We may be literal strangers to each other, but I want you to know that I can be by your side if you’ll let me, Chaeyoung”

 

The younger drank her wine bottoms up and Mina continued what she was saying.

 

“No matter what others say to you, I believe in you. You will get there when it’s your time. Take your time and you’ll eventually achieve your goal. You deserve to be happy and you deserve to keep moving forward with a positive mindset. The world is a better place to live in because you are existing.”

 

They say that a soulmate is the most intense type of relationship a person will have in their entire life. It is something so serious, more than marriage and a boyfriend or girlfriend relationships. It has a motive of reminding each other with their own purpose in life. They come together to help awaken each other and remind them of who they really are. They are there to reconnect an individual with their soul essence.

 

That day when Chaeyoung met Mina for the third time in Paris with nothing planned at all, she instantly knew it was fate. She just denied it because she doesn’t even know the underlying depth of the word fate and how it applies to the both of them and their unusual meetings.

 

Yet, no matter how Chaeyoung keeps on staring at Mina’s photo she took again during their dinner and stay in Paris, she keeps on asking herself why does see her as her own soulmate and why does she feel a strong connection towards her when they're a mere stranger.

 

That question keeps on echoing in her mind, almost bothering her from her peaceful sleep, though she’s grateful for it because she has been away from negative thoughts for a while ever since that dinner at the Eiffel tower.

 

What does she see in Mina that she instantly thought of her as her soulmate?

 

What information does she know about the girl that she feels like they’re on the same boat, experiencing similar things?

 

What is the reason why Mina’s existence feels like warmth and comfort to her?

 

Why does she feel so safe whenever Mina smiles at her and gives her some assuring words?

 

Is it because she’s just lonely and living alone, that is why she’s physically and emotionally deprived of someone? Is it some symptoms of the medicine she takes?

 

Chaeyoung doesn’t exactly know the reason and she wants to gradually find it all out as she now started hoping that she could bump into Mina again and bump into her more as she keeps on with her journey.

 

Fourth country and Chaeyoung feel so good about it because she really wants to try cleansing her soul through her travel in Thailand.

 

She was just happily walking in one of the temples she visited that day when a familiar figure was also walking in front of her with her big hat on her head and she was wearing a long dress that waves with the wind. It is as if she’s in a deep thought that she didn’t notice Chaeyoung was already approaching her.

 

“How nice it would be to have someone explore this whole amazing place with me”

 

The person then eventually stopped walking and went out of her thoughts as she look at her left side just to see Chaeyoung with a wide smile on her face and the latter just confirmed that the figure is indeed familiar with her.

 

“Oh my gosh, you’re here!”

 

“Yes, I am here!”

 

The startled face made Chaeyoung giggle, but told her to lower down her voice as they might exit the place sooner than they thought because of their voices.

 

“What the hell are you doing here? Oh my gosh, I really didn’t expect to see you here yet here you are”

 

“I know!? Same goes to you. What are you doing here?”

 

“Vacation, of course. I’m just glad my company lets me out for at least 2 weeks and let me be out of the country to rest that’s why I’m here”

 

“Oh. So we have the same reason why we’re here then”

 

They saw a bench and sat there for a while as they admire the temple from quite far their view.

 

“It’s nice to see you for the fourth time, in a different country once again, Mina”

 

On a different country and on a different time where it’s so freaking hot in the summer and they’re both walking in some temple in Thailand wearing long dresses and their sandals with big hats on their heads, Mina and Chaeyoung met again for the fourth time.

 

And now Chaeyoung’s belief in fate keeps on getting stronger because it’s already the fourth time yet she hasn’t got Mina’s full name nor number nor social media account to contact her, but they’re there, beside each other, decided to walk again and pay some respects as they eventually enter and solemnly pray.

 

Chaeyoung can totally imagine how nice it would be if she have someone she can cry on. She thinks that it’s really a shallow idea and she can literally cry with only herself, but she would want to have someone who caresses her back and tell her it’s okay to cry, who will wipe her tears away, who will let her feel anything she feels because it’s valid.

 

She thinks that it would be nice if she have someone by her side when she’s afraid—of being left alone, of saying goodbye, of everything. She wants someone to hold her and give her assurance. She wants someone that she can lean on. She wants someone who will not say goodbye to her because it sure will give her trauma because Chaeyoung doesn’t want goodbyes, she’s too afraid to say goodbye even if it will result to a betterment of anything. She just can’t say goodbye because she doesn’t want to experience all the misfortune that have happened in her life. She doesn’t want to be alone anymore.

 

She thinks that it would be nice if she have someone to wait for her to open up. Even if all her hopes are just so selfish and focused only on her side, she admits that she wants someone that will understand her. She wants to experience to have someone that can wait for her until she’s prepared with everything. Chaeyoung has been alone for more than a decade already and only knows about herself, only care about herself, and this time she realized how nice it would be if she can have someone she can share stories with.

 

It would be really nice if it will work out like that, but no, she doesn’t have anyone and she’s too embarrassed to admit that she’s in need of those. She was used to having just by herself and she can’t imagine the chaos she will make if she will have someone to stay by her side and have to live with her moody who will cry at the middle of the night, keep on beating herself up, and blaming everything that has happened bad to herself. She doesn’t want to cause trouble to anyone already so she thinks that she should just withdraw all her wishes as she doesn’t deserve someone to be with her.

 

Mina was thinking the opposite, though. When Chaeyoung mentioned that it would be nice to have someone that she could walk to into that temple, she immediately knew what the girl meant and she just thinks that Chaeyoung indeed deserves everything.

 

That is the reason why on that night, right after she met Chaeyoung in the temple and had some chit chat with her about her whereabouts and her life in general, she decided to write a letter for her future.

 

Crazy as she may seem but she just wants to give assurance that she will give her best to be a good lover that she is.

 

Hi Darling,

I hope you’re having an amazing day today.

This would be random, but I want you to know that I would always stay by your side—to hold your hand and hug you tightly. I would always believe in you, in everything you do. I would always be proud of you and I would always make you feel loved and supported. I would always appreciate you, every little thing about you. I would be that someone you can cry on, I can be a shoulder and I can lend my ear to listen to your unending stories that I would never get tired listening to. I would assure you that everything will be okay and I would always understand everything that you’re afraid of. I would never leave your side and make you feel that you’re not enough and you’re not deserving of anything nice in the world. I would wait for you to open up until you’re comfortable and ready enough to tell me everything, even just anything.

I do not have any plans of letting your hand go, instead, I’ll intertwine it with mine and never let it go.

I promise to love you today and every day.

 

Mina doesn’t have a clear reason to why she wrote that crappy letter, but it’s probably to ease what she is bothered about and it is the one and only Chaeyoung who is still a stranger to her, but it somehow feels like she’s not, that she’s actually more than that.

 

When Chaeyoung’s next country made her feel a lot more jet lag because it’s on the other side of the world again, she let herself rest for the whole day once again and just stay in her own hotel room without unpacking her things and changing her clothes, just removing her shoes and bonnet hat.

 

She guesses that she’s feeling better ever since she started her journey, she just often feels physically tired because it’s not just in one continent, but literally around the world and her itinerary is an extraordinary one that doesn’t just transfer from one place to another near place, but almost at the other side.

 

Once she’s good already the next morning, she went for a walk in the bay just to see the famous Golden Gate Bridge and hopefully take some photos she could have as a souvenir and to be part of her personal project of collecting photos in every trip she has.

 

She was actually in a good mood as she really had a good night’s sleep and already arranged her things in her hotel room so she went for a light breakfast before fully enjoy her walk.

 

“You look great today! Wow!”

 

Chaeyoung almost had a heart attack when someone just tapped her shoulder from the back and she was just so glad that her camera strap was on her neck or else she would’ve lost her precious camera in just a snap as well as caught a heart disease.

 

“So fate is really testing us, huh?”

 

“Excuse me. It should be ‘it’s nice to see you for the fifth time’ and not any other phrase, Chaeyoung”

 

Truth be told, fate really might be playing both with Mina and Chaeyoung as they saw each other again in San Francisco as the older brings some burgers on hand and asked the younger if she could eat it with her.

 

“Why buy two when you can’t even finish one? You’re so annoying”

 

“I just have a hunch that I’ll be meeting a really good friend today and I did. What are the odds, right?”

 

“Yeah, right. You and your predictions. What are you doing here anyway? A training or a seminar? It’s impossible if you came here just for vacation or some sort”

 

“Of course, you’ll know it. I’m actually in a business presentation that’s why I’m here and it’s our free day today before we could go to our endless meetings. It’s so tiring, honestly”

 

“But you love your job”

 

“Exactly. Even if it requires me a lot of things to do, whether to write report papers or present it or suddenly have a dance training or dance workshop. I love it all, as long as I’m on my track. I don’t have to worry about anything”

 

“I envy you, Mina”

 

“Don’t be. You can take your time, Chaeyoung. As I always said, I believe in you. You could have that drive again.”

 

Chaeyoung asked Mina if she could be her muse again for the day just like the photo walk they had when they were in Paris and Quebec. And just like what she expected, the girl already knows what she is doing and just keep on striking poses that the photographer certainly loves to see because every angle is just too perfect and it seems like Mina doesn’t even have a bad one.

 

When they got tired, they sit on one of the empty benches as Chaeyoung bought some hotdog buns for the both of them.

 

“You know what, I actually have a life update for you.”

 

“Really? Alright, I’m all ears”

 

“I’ve been thinking about this like a few days ago when I just landed here in California. This is so random, but I hope to have a family in the future because I just recently discovered that I actually like kids and I’m fond of them. I want someone that I can pour all my love with and I think I’m already prepared for settlement with someone.”

 

“I—wow.”

 

“It’s so…weird, right? I mean, I am not mentally stable ever since that happened and anything may trigger be to get back to that state, yet I am aiming high about wanting to have a family and loving someone”

 

Mina holds both Chaeyoung’s hand and the latter just forgot how it feels to have warm hands hold her cold ones that made her into tears, but Mina was more focused with what the younger has just said.

 

“I’m so proud of you, Chaeyoung. More than you’ll ever know. I believe that you’re really getting better and the world is just so ready to receive all the love you can give. You deserve the smile that appears on your face that means that you’re really happy”

 

She then wiped Chaeyoung’s tears away and gave her an assuring smile. Chaeyoung just slowly learns that it is becoming her favorite.

 

“You should feel warm all time. The coldness that the world gives you doesn’t suit you.”

 

“Thank you, Mina”

 

“Also, how many kids would you like to have and do you already have names for them? Tell me more, I’m willing to listen to you until sunset”

 

Mina can surely imagine her future with someone and the things she wants to do.

 

First is that, she can imagine having two shoes beside each other at the front door of their house. She can also imagine two aprons in their kitchen and many pairs of kitchen appliances. She can imagine having two toothbrushes in their comfort room, brushing each other’s teeth while looking silly at each other. She can imagine having cuddles at their living room while watching some drama or binge-watching some movies or series. She can imagine dancing under the moonlight while a romantic song is playing in the background. She can imagine playful kisses right after they wake up in the morning.

 

And a lot more, that just gives a blush in Mina’s cheeks because it’s all about being cheesy and she would blame it for herself being a hopeless romantic.

 

However, at the end of those thoughts, she ended up thinking of doing all of those with just one person and it is Chaeyoung.

 

Chaeyoung can admit that it truly melts her heart when someone wishes her to be happy.

 

There’s an unexplainable feeling inside of her when someone tells her that they want to see Chaeyoung smile so often because it might not be in her knowing but it can brighten up someone’s world.

 

On the busy streets of the eternal city that is Chaeyoung’s 6^th country in her itinerary make her feel that she’s blessed because amidst all the chaos that has happened in her whole life, she still chose to live and move forward, even if she had so many instances where she just feel like giving up because she doesn’t know where she’s headed.

 

She’s also thankful for that certain someone that came into her life after a decade of being alone and just made her whole world be shaken as that person didn’t fail to show her that the world is just amazing as it is, she just needs to discover more of it as she discovers more of herself.

 

Even if the fact that she keeps on missing her family members and she’s afraid to not know remember their faces anymore, there will always be that someone that reminds her that everything will be eventually okay and that she just needs to wait for the right time for everything about her and her surroundings heal.

 

After all, it is her main reason to why she is eager to travel the whole world and she just needs to keep it in mind.

 

When she was having her lunch at some restaurant she doesn’t know exists because it’s not in any of the webpages she has searched, she is still thankful that she found it because she can feel that it serves a one of a kind food that Rome only offers.

 

She was browsing the menu even if she already ordered when someone just casually sit in front of her without even asking her if it’s taken already.

 

“Sixth and I noticed you now changed your hair to pink?”

 

“Mina?”

 

The girl now has a jet black hair and was cut above her shoulder that gives her a MILF look, but Chaeyoung doesn’t want to be obvious that’s why she just shoved the menu to her face to focus for a moment before she gets back to the girl in front of her wearing a casual white empire dress that definitely looks good on her.

 

“Have a nice lunch, Chaeyoung”

 

She smiled at her and was about to get out on the table when Chaeyoung accidentally grabbed her arm, but let go of it instantly when she realized it.

 

“Wait. Aren’t you joining me for lunch? Do you have any schedule?”

 

Mina chuckled and ruffled Chaeyoung’s hair.

 

“I have someone with me at the other restaurant”

 

She pointed the restaurant in front and Chaeyoung sighed in defeat.

 

“Oh, I see.”

 

“But we can meet here tonight for dinner. How about 6:30? We just have an important thing to discuss that is work-related, that’s why I’m here. And I saw you when I was entering and confirmed that it’s actually you, so yeah.”

 

“Fate still playing. Anyway, 6:30 sounds good. I’ll see you later. Thanks, Mina!”

 

“Goodbye, Chaeyoung!”

 

There’s something that triggered the younger, but she didn’t let it win as she doesn’t want Mina to see her crying once again so when the girl eventually left and her food was served, she was crying while eating, feeling embarrassed because she’s in a public place with only herself yet she’s acting like a weirdo.

 

Night quickly came and Chaeyoung thankfully survived the whole day without locking herself on her hotel room and instead continued with her plan of visiting some famous landmarks in the city before she eventually came back to the restaurant she had some lunch on and meet Mina for dinner there.

 

“Hey, I’m sorry I made you wait for minutes. Shall we eat on another restaurant or you would like to eat here again?”

 

“How about we take away some food from here and just eat elsewhere? Like a public place?”

 

“I would love that. Just in time for stargazing, I guess? There’s a lot of stars tonight and it would be great to see them outdoors”

 

“Agree”

 

They bought some carbonara and pizza al taglio for their dinner and enjoyed the night breeze that certainly gives comfort in both their systems.

 

“Mina, I just want you to know that I really don’t like saying goodbye in general, nor receiving a goodbye, though you don’t have to worry about it, just in case you will, because I’m already getting rid of that fear of mine”

 

“Hey, it’s okay. I understand. I’m sorry about that.”

 

“It’s okay. I’m probably just still sensitive about it since I really didn’t have to say goodbye to them properly and now receiving goodbye feels like someone will literally leave me for good.”

 

“Can I hug you, Chaeyoung?”

 

Chaeyoung nodded as Mina gently moved closer to snug the younger closer to her and gave her some body heat, even if it’s not cold that night. However, Mina’s warmth might be her favorite instantly, just like her adorable, assuring gummy smile.

 

It feels so nice being in her arms under the sea of stars, without everyone judging her whole being.

 

She genuinely thinks that it feels so wonderful being in that situation as she’s not thinking of anything, just Mina’s warm embrace and how it feels so comforting and already enough to make her warm for the years to come.

 

Mina’s hug felt like home and she never knew she needed that hug until the younger initiated and now she’s already sobbing. She wants to withdraw already, but Mina let them stay in that position so the idea of being there and not going anywhere could sink in with Chaeyoung.

 

“I’m here. You could cry on me, just like what I said. Cry all you want, Chaeyoung”

 

The whole scenario in Rome made Mina and Chaeyoung both contemplate with their feelings because it’s their only sixth time meeting yet the feeling they can bring to each other is so intense that others could really think that they’re already a couple when they don’t even know what’s happening between the two of them.

 

There’s really an unexplainable thing the both of them has for each other and isn’t it so strange that they keep on seeing each other in different parts of the world, no matter what the circumstance is? They talk like they’re so close with each other and they just hugged. What kind of strangers hugs at night under the sea of stars in some public space in Rome? They aren’t kids anymore who can just talk to strangers, even if their parents taught them not to and they certainly won’t hug one another just to give comfort.

 

Different cities and different purposes, yet fate keep on bringing them back together. They want to ask the universe what is its plan about their relationship because it sure is confusing having someone who knows about their life already yet they still remain as strangers because they don’t even know where one lives and they just talk according to the language they know and understand that is thankfully same for the both of them.

 

Mina admits that she is not quite sure with her feelings, but whenever she is reminded of Chaeyoung, no matter where she is in the world or what she is doing, she will always be reminded of her eye smile and cute dimple and mole that makes her feel like it would be really nice to give all her love to her because she truly deserve it.

 

Her initial reaction might be because she pity the girl for being an orphan and being alone in her whole life, but there’s something inside that tells her that it’s much more than that and it’s actually more than serious, no matter how short they have known each other, despite the months of seeing each other because they literally just see one another once a month coincidentally in different places.

 

She just thinks that every time she meets her, something grows inside of her and she wants to clearly know everything about it, that’s why she keeps on asking herself if she really feel something romantic for her or she just like the idea of it.

 

While Chaeyoung is confused she has never felt anything about it in her whole life and she doesn’t have anything to base her own feelings.

 

All she knows is just she certainly enjoys Mina’s company, likes her smile, and finds comfort in her embrace.

 

Everything about Mina makes her see fireworks even in the morning and gives sparks in her whole system and she would always look forward to bump into her wherever she is in the world.

 

It was in Japan, where cherry blossoms are starting to bloom in all the streets of Kobe and Mina never felt the nostalgic feeling of home because of that, particularly that it is indeed her hometown and it’s been years since she went to that place where she built all her dreams, failed, but got up again to pursue every single thing in her list.

 

It was also where Mina and Chaeyoung met for the seventh time and this time, the latter didn’t hesitate with all her thoughts already and just straightforwardly asked a really important question to the girl while catching her breath.

 

“First of all. Gosh. I didn’t know I would find you here when I just want to witness the cherry blossoms, but you are so damn pretty with your red long hair and I could talk all day about how you make my heart flutter in everything you do, but my point is that… I really came here with high hopes of meeting you for the seventh time because I want you to ask, with all my heart and soul, if you could be my last girlfriend, Mina?”

 

It was absolutely sudden and overwhelming that Mina’s tears just immediately fell from her eyes and Chaeyoung doesn’t know if she did the right thing or not because they’re literally in the middle of a street in a public place where people will pass by and Chaeyoung was running because she wants to make sure if it’s really Mina that she saw and oh, how the Gods favor her because they met again where she is just so sure about her feelings and will certainly not regret about everything that will happen that moment.

 

“Chaeyoung, let me breathe for a moment”

 

She closed her eyes, trying to absorb everything that just happened because all she knows is that she is visiting her parents and her brother that day as she has an important meeting in Osaka 2 days after that, yet there Mina was, with Chaeyoung for the second time and she keeps on believing that fate really wants them to be together.

 

“I would take no for an answer because I respect you and there are so many things to conside—“

 

“The only answer I will say is yes Chaeyoung. I will be your last girlfriend”

 

It was more than just a feeling of being on cloud nine, nor smiling from ear to ear nor butterflies in their stomach because it is certainly the best thing that happened in their whole journey of seeing one another in different parts of the world with no contact at all, just letting it all happen with the help of fate.

 

Japan was sure was marvelous and gave Chaeyoung a magnificent photographs, particularly because of her favorite and forever muse, but what makes the place really special is that she finally realized her worth and purpose: to love Mina everyday.

 

They have another reason to look forward to their next visit in Seoul because it is yet the time they are both waiting for where they will have 10 consecutive days to stay with one another and they already have some things to fulfill.

 

No more depending on fate as they already exchanged their contact number and social media accounts, even knew each other’s family and decided to just stay in one place right after all their settlements with their respective jobs.

 

But for now, they just want to focus in enjoying their stay in Seoul without worrying about the next day because they will surely keep on seeing each other.

 

They made a bucket list to achieve in those 10 days and they will make sure to make it all to the fullest as they want to cherish every little moment they have.

 

The first one is really random and funny but they want to participate in a marathon together to see who is healthier among the both of them.

 

They woke up extra early than usual and saw professional runners joining the event that Mina doesn’t even know why Chaeyoung is really interested, but she would love to keep staying fit and so she joined her.

 

They were both competitive, of course. Running until they’re out of breath, then jogging then walking then running again. They were laughing at each other whenever they almost passed by some grandparents joining the marathon as well and even lowkey wished that they should look like that when they are grandmothers already.

 

It was a success, but they did some cheat day right after as they eat everything they want due to physical tiredness.

 

“We should just continue to the gym instead of the restaurant. Why am I even eating a burger after running kilometers?”

 

“I’ll eat it if you want”

 

“I’m kidding. Pass over the ketchup, please”

 

The next day after that, they just decided to sleep all day as they have a date on the nighttime where they will have a cruise on Han river.

 

It may be cliché to others and already a usual dating spot, but it is actually a first both for Mina and Chaeyoung.

 

They can say it is romantic, like all the other cruise they have been to all around the globe, but it is more romantic because they now have their own partner they can clank win glasses with and even enjoy the view.

 

Their timing is just right because there are fireworks in the middle of the cruise right after they finished their dinner and the sparks in Chaeyoung’s eyes is evident that made Mina feel at ease.

 

“You really look beautiful when you smile, Chaeyoung”

 

Their eyes met as the fireworks both reflect in their eyes. It was a picture perfect scene, as if coming out of a movie and they just stay there adoring each other’s beauty, looking right over their soul through their eyes.

 

Mina is beyond grateful to see that Chaeyoung’s not soulless anymore and that night she promised that she will keep on loving her until she can.

 

The third one in their bucket list is two things combined and that is to watch the sunset and have a campfire so they pack their things and went to the nearest beach to camp.

 

Another cliché one, but they would really love to experience it wherever in the world and since they’re in Seoul, they just travelled less than an hour to arrive in one.

 

They enjoyed some water activities both in the morning and afternoon and just waited for the sunset as they lay their heads beside each other in their tent.

 

“It feels so delightful and surreal having you by my side in my favorite part of the day, Chaeyoung.”

 

“Me, too. I still can’t believe what just happened and it may be fast, but we can make it slow, as long as we’re together”

 

“Thank you, Chaeyoung.”

 

“No. Thank you, Mina. For everything. Just like the sunset, I believe that our relationship will be strengthened and you are the one who completed me just like sunset having a meaning of completing the day. Thank you for being the missing puzzle piece in my life and for accepting me for who I am”

 

They intertwined their fingers as the clouds slowly turn into dark ones from a mixture of pink, orange, and yellow. It finally sets and it’s now nighttime.

 

“Time for the campfire! Yey!”

 

Chaeyoung screamed like a child that made Mina chuckle as they assemble everything they need.

 

Once they’re settled and the fire is already big enough for the both of them, they sat beside each other.

 

“Can you toast another marshmallow for me, please?”

 

The pout in Mina’s face made Chaeyoung want to say yes to her girlfriend, but since she’s just a tease, she gave her the whole pack of marshmallows.

 

“You have hands, you can toast it yourself”

 

She immediately received a smack on her shoulder that made her laugh.

 

“I’m just joking. Why the hell is your hand so big and heavy, it feels like I’m going to have a bruise the next morning.”

 

“What did you say, Son Chaeyoung? Can you repeat it for me?”

 

“I said I love you, Myoui Mina”

 

The sincerity in Chaeyoung’s voice is obvious that Mina just made her suddenly kiss her girlfriend passionately with all the love she has for her.

 

It lasted for about a minute before they both withdraw and gasp for air as they giggle at each other and let their forehead rest in front of one another.

 

It was a magical moment, like all the kissing scenes they watch from a movie or read from a book, but no, it’s actually more than that because it tastes so sweet like strawberry, like a warm cup of coffee, a comfortable pillow, and their favorite music. It all felt like that and much more.

 

Chaeyoung eventually fulfilled everything that she wants in life that she never knew she will complete it all and she thinks she is now ready without regrets and certainly forever grateful for Mina.

 

She then rested her head in Mina’s shoulder as they stare at the bonfire in front of them and intertwine her hand with Mina’s own.

 

“Mina, I will not get tired of saying how grateful I am to have you in my life and to meet you in different circumstances. It means a lot to me as you mean a lot to me, as well. I don’t have anything to wish in life anymore as you’re more than enough for me. You’re a blessing and I want you to know that. I love you so much and you will always be my one and only love”

 

“Hey, why are you saying all those things as if we’re going to be separated again and will see one another after a month or so? I mean, I really appreciate the thought, but are you okay, Chaeng?”

 

“Mhm. I just feel sleepy all of a sudden. Thank you for today, Mina. I promise to love you in every day of my life. I’m still afraid to say goodbye and to feel left alone, so please stay with me”

 

“I will always stay with you, Chaeyoung. You don’t have to say it out loud, I just will”

 

She kissed her forehead and they continue to cherish that moment as they don’t know when it will happen again.

 

Minutes after as the fire gradually die down and night breeze is getting colder, Chaeyoung’s grip on Mina’s hand loosen and the latter just thinks that she is already dozing off, however, she can also feel that she becomes colder, despite wearing a thick cloth on a summer night.

 

She doesn’t want to think about her initial thought, but it feels like her gut is telling the truth. There’s tears suddenly falling from her eyes as she hold Chaeyoung’s hand tighter and snuggling the girl closer to her heart.

 

They say that soulmates can touch a person in such a deep and profound ways that their memory will always remain. They will always have a special place in their hearts.

 

And that moment, Mina was there, thinking about her own soulmate beside her and she just stayed there, like she promised when they were kids when she witnessed a confused and hurting little Chaeyoung lost her family in that car accident, that she will always stay beside her, until she can.