“We’re done for today! Good job, everyone!”

Ryujin collapses as soon as Yeji turns the speakers off, feeling all sorts of gross and sticky, desperate to scare away the heat threatening to melt her skin into a puddle of sweat — even if that means ungraciously throwing herself over the cold floor, in front of at least another ten people. 

But hey, it’s not like they’ll judge her. Now, laugh at her worn out state and take a few shots to share on their snapchats? Maybe. (“Delete that right now, Kim Jimin. I have a reputation to keep— what do you mean you’ve already sent it to everyone? You little brat—“) They’re all friends here, after all; have been, for two entire semesters now.

Ryujin scans the room and finds Yeji and Yeoreum by the door, patting everyone on their backs and offering them encouraging words as they leave, probably rushing to the nearest bathroom to get rid of the nasty sweat covering their bodies after hours of practice. Ryujin knows she should be there too, as the sub captain of the team and all that, but she can’t move. The captain and the lead captain won’t die if she doesn’t stand by their side and say a great job! to the rest of the team today.

Yeoreum sits next to Ryujin on the floor once everyone is out, and Yeji follows suit. The latter can’t help but to wince as her eyes travel from the blonde mess sitting on top of Ryujin’s head to her bruised knees. “Damn, you look like , Ryujin.”

Ryujin scoffs. “I can say the same about you, miss tomato forehead.”

Yeji rests a hand over her forehead and pouts. “It wasn’t my fault! Heejin ran over me like a truck!”

“It was your fault, though,” Yeoreum chimes in, eyes immersed in the screen of her phone as she types a text. “You’re the one that went to the wrong side.”

“It’s okay, Jisu can take care of it,” Ryujin wiggles her eyebrows and nudges Yeji’s leg with her elbow, giggling when her best friend’s face flushes a bright red. “Look, now your entire face is a tomato. How adorable.”

“Shut up,” Yeji rolls her eyes and slaps Ryujin’s sore thigh. Ryujin bites on her fist to fight back a pained groan. She guesses she deserved that.

“I wish I could stay for… whatever this is,” Yeoreum gestures vaguely in their direction, pushing herself into a standing position right after, “But I have an important thing with Yeonjung now.”

“Important thing,” Ryujin deadpans, “Is that what kids call face these days?”

Yeoreum throws her backpack over her shoulders, offers Ryujin a sweet (life threatening) smile and says, “Do you want another bruise on that pretty leg of yours, Ryujinie?”

Ryujin’s smug expression morphs into one of an innocent angel in the blink of an eye. “No, ma’am. Have fun with your lovely girlfriend.”

“I will,” the sinister smile is still there, and maybe, just maybe, Ryujin’s blood runs cold, “Text me if you guys need anything.”

And with that, Yeoreum is out the door, leaving Ryujin and Yeji behind. Ryujin sighs, counts one, two, three—

“I’m worried about you, Ryujin.”

There it is.

Ryujin massages her temples with the tip of her fingers, “I told you a million times, Yeji. You don’t have to worry about me, it’s fine. I am fine.”

“No, you’re not,” Yeji lies beside her, shivers when the cold temperature hits her flaming skin, “When was the last time you had a proper night of sleep?”

“Dunno,” Ryujin murmurs, then she shrugs, “But it’s fine—”

“Ryujin—“

“We’re all working our asses off for this, including you,” Ryujin abruptly cuts the girl, “This is my first time being the center and this is a huge competition, an opportunity I can't risk to ruin.” 

“But Ryujin—“

“I have to be perfect , Yeji,” Ryujin sighs exasperatedly, drags a hand through her face, “I can’t afford to be anything less than that right now. Not only for myself, but for the whole team.”

Yeji’s mouth opens and closes a thousand times before she lets out a tired exhale, “Fine. I get it. But please, please take care of yourself a bit, okay? I don’t want you to get hurt,” she pauses, stares at Ryujin’s knees and takes a deep breath, “Even more, I mean.”

“Okay, captain ,” Ryujin teases in an attempt to lighten up the atmosphere. Yeji laughs, and Ryujin takes it as a win. “Make sure to take care of that lump in the middle of your forehead, too.”

“Mhm,” Yeji gets up, stretching her limbs before she grabs the forgotten backpack at the corner of the room, “I’d stay for a while but I gotta go. I have some important stuff with Jisu too, you know.”

Ryujin chuckles at the reference. “I know. Tell her I said hi.”

“Will do,” Yeji smiles as she walks towards the door, turning around to catch a glimpse of her best friend once she grabs the knob, “Go to the dorms, okay? You’ve practiced enough for today.”

Ryujin nods, lips curling up. “Alright.”

Yeji flashes Ryujin one last worried look before she closes the door behind her, leaving Ryujin alone with the mirrors, the speakers and her thoughts.

Ryujin sits, groaning loudly when pain crashes through her throbbing back. “Yeah, maybe I should go home,” she sighs, collects her stuff, and leaves.

 

 

Ryujin gets home, takes a shower, slaps some patches where it hurts and throws herself on the bed. 

She turns the television on, goes to YouTube and presses play on a video titled The Gay Subtext of High School Musical because why the hell not, and tries to relax.

Ryujin tries, she swears she does.

But she fails.

Around the four minute mark (“So this song called I Don’t Dance begins when Ryan decides to make the very bold decision to hit on Chad, because— because you see, he sees something that we don’t,” the youtuber says, and Ryujin nods eagerly,) Ryujin stands in front of the mirror, practicing some of her most used facial expressions. 

Frightening let’s get burning now replays in Ryujin’s head a thousand times as she struggles to grasp the specific feeling of power she needs to execute one of her center parts flawlessly. 

 

ryujin

what time are u getting home

yeji

oh

i’m staying @ jisu’s tonight !!

ryujin

woahhhh hwang yeji look at you

all grown and

yeji

stfu

why did u ask though

ryujin

nothing important

have fun!

yeji

…

ryujin sus

ryujin

go back to your gf lmao

 

Ryujin smirks, changes into a shirt that doesn’t have a hole on it, and disappears through the door without a second thought.

 

Ryujin holds the fiery expression on her face for five solid seconds before she allows her body to relax, resting her back against the white wall in an attempt to regain her breath. Despite the throbbing muscles, she feels at ease — she might’ve figured out the ideal way to manage the look on her face towards the end of the song. It’s no longer bland, but she doesn’t look like a disturbed psycho, either. 

It isn’t perfect yet, but it will be. It has to be. Ryujin will make it flawless, eventually.

But right now all she needs is water. Urgently. Or she thinks she might die.

So she rushes to the cafeteria, buys a bottle of water, and slides into the table where two of her favorite seniors are sitting together, probably searching for some choreography inspiration with how intensely they’re watching some random dance video, too immersed to notice Ryujin’s presence.

“That looks cool,” Ryujin comments, and Eunbi nearly lets the phone slip from her hands.

“I could’ve died, you know?” Eunbi whines and glares at Ryujin. It’s like being threatened by a cute little rabbit.

“I’ve been sitting here for a solid minute,” Ryujin deadpans as she opens the bottle, “It’s not my fault you didn’t notice.”

“She has a point,” Sojung nods, then flashes Ryujin a wary look, “What are you doing here, though? It’s nearly eight, everyone from your team went home already, no?”

“They did, and I did too,” Ryujin pauses to drink the water and nearly cries from the pleasing sensation, “But I came back.”

Sojung tsks, “Yeoreumie was right, then. She said I would catch you around here later.”

Ryujin smiles sheepishly, “Am I that obvious?”

Both seniors nod without hesitation. Ryujin visibly deflates.

“By the way,” Sojung fishes for something in her bag, handing it to Ryujin once she finds it, “She told me to give you these.”

Ryujin grabs the plastic package, examines it suspiciously, and frowns. “And what is this, exactly? Poison?”

“Natural medicine for muscle pain, ” Sojung lightly shoves Ryujin’s shoulder and giggles, “She asked me to give it to you because, in her own words, she’d rather die than show you any sort of affection.”

Ryujin rolls her eyes, but there’s a hint of a smile at the corner of her lips. “Tell her that I love her too.”

Eunbi, who was holding back a laugh during the entire exchange, chimes in, “How is practice going, nation’s center?”

Ryujin scoffs at the nickname her friends gave her after she was voted as center, but is quick to answer, “It’s okay, I think. We’re fast learners, it’s just a matter of turning the details into masterpieces,” she shrugs, then stares at Eunbi with mischief shining in her eyes, “What about you, nation’s choreographer ?”

“Stop,” Eunbi groans, then a laugh escapes through her lips, “It’s been good, really. I think we’re winning this thing.”

Ryujin sighs as her mind drifts away to the trophy room of their dance studio building, dreaming of seeing a golden prize with Center Shin Ryujin engraved on it. She wants them to win so, so ing bad — craves for the first place more than anything that could possibly exist in this vast world. “I hope so, unnie.”

The three of them gossip about the opponent teams for a while (“The Lions seem to be pretty strong this year.” “Yeah, but you know who our biggest competition is this time.” “Ugh, don’t even mention it.”) before they go their separate ways — Sojung and Eunbi to the third floor to attend some night classes and Ryujin back to the practice room.

What Ryujin doesn’t expect, however, is to hear music blasting from the speakers when she gets to the door — it wasn’t Hala Hala , it wasn’t HIT , and most definitely wasn’t Psycho — and the sound of shoes stomping against the floor like it’s trying to break it.

Ryujin pushes the door open and scoffs when she sees who’s there. Of course . 

The other girl jumps when she catches Ryujin’s reflection in the mirror, but it doesn’t take long for her to get her together and for a scowl to take over her features. “What are you doing here?”

Ryujin scoffs again. “I should be the one asking you that,” she points to the bag on the floor, “I was here first.”

“Well,” the girl crosses her arms against her chest, arching an eyebrow in defiance, “You and your team were supposed to practice here in the afternoon. Night is my time, not yours.”

Ryujin wants to commit murder. But instead she takes a deep breath, takes a few steps, and stops in front of Lee Chaeryeong, the soloist from Manta Studio and possibly the biggest pain in her .

 

The war between them was established during a specific night where Yeji was feeling like after getting into a fight with her crush and Ryujin, being the amazing best friend that she is, rushed to the nearest convenience store at midnight to grab all sorts of candies, drinks and of course, Yeji’s favorite chocolate milk.

That damn chocolate milk.

A cold hand collapsed against hers the second she grabbed the last chocolate milk left in the freezer. Ryujin looked up, slightly annoyed at the disturbance, and was greeted by the view of a flushed girl who seemed to be around her age, looking like she just ran a marathon.

“You need to give me that,” the girl’s eyes flickered from the box to Ryujin’s face, and she sounded desperate as she said, “It’s an emergency.”

Ryujin remembered Yeji’s puffy eyes and the tears that came out of them and her grip on the box became firmer. “I have an emergency, too.”

The girl took a deep breath, glared at Ryujin, and hissed, “Give it to me.”

Ryujin scoffed, making sure to return the glare at the same intensity. Who does that girl think she is? “No, I don’t think I will.”

The stranger clenched her jaw. “ Now .”

“No—“

The box exploded before Ryujin could come up with another snarky remark. The two of them stood there, staring at each other with bewildered expressions as chocolate dripped from their hands.

But the best part of the chocolate hurricane experience happened a week later, when Yeji and her crush got their together and started dating.

Jisu was quick to connect the dots when Ryujin told her the story, gasping dramatically before she blurted out, “ Oh my God , you’re convenience store girl!”

Ryujin blinked. “What?”

“The girl you’re talking about— she’s my best friend, Lee Chaeryeong!”

A nervous chuckle came out of Ryujin’s mouth, “No, it can’t be.”

Then Jisu grabbed her phone, showed her a picture of her and insufferable girl pressing their cheeks together, and all Ryujin wanted to do was to throw herself out of the nearest window.

 

“What is it, Lee Chaeryeong,” Ryujin tilts her head and crosses her arms under her chest, “Afraid that I’ll make fun of the weak little dance you came up with for the competition?”

Chaeryeong tsks, breaks the intense eye contact for a second to roll her eyes, then throws Ryujin a sharp gaze, “Afraid that you might try to steal it for your dumb team after you see how amazing it is.”

Ryujin doesn’t even try to hold back the laughter that flows out of once she registers Chaeryeong’s words, both arms holding her stomach as she struggles to regain her breath, “ You— You’re so ridiculous, oh my God.”

Chaeryeong’s stoic expression doesn’t falter. “Are you done?” She deadpans, motions to the door, “I would like to go back to practice.”

“I would like to do that, too,” Ryujin puts on a sly grin, “But you’re making it difficult for me.”

Chaeryeong clenches her jaw. “Leave, Ryujin.”

“No, I don’t think I will.” Ryujin says, not only because she enjoys seeing Chaeryeong fuming to the point where her neck becomes red, but also because she needs to practice. Badly . She’s not going to give up so easily — at least not without a fight.

Chaeryeong closes her eyes, takes a deep breath, and pinches the bridge of her nose. She seems to be considering her options. Or plotting the perfect murder. Ryujin can’t tell what’s on Chaeryeong’s mind most of the time. “Let’s make it fair, then.”

Ryujin frowns, places her hands on her waist and raises one eyebrow. “How?”

Chaeryeong smirks, “Dance battle. The best one gets the studio for tonight.”

Ryujin is taken aback for a second. A dance battle? With Lee Chaeryeong, the girl she loathes, of all people? That’s unexpected, for sure. But Ryujin is not one to back away from a challenge, especially when it involves the one thing she exceeds at, so she returns the smirk and says, “Bring it on, Lee.”

Chaeryeong turns around, smirk still glued on her face, and walks towards the speakers. She unlocks her phone, scrolls through a few Spotify playlists until she finds something that pleases her and presses play, leaving the device over her backpack before she stands in front of Ryujin again.

It’s quite terrifying, really, how easily Chaeryeong’s dull gaze melts into a fiery one as soon as the first beat drops. But what sends chills down Ryujin’s spine is the way the girl refuses to stop digging holes into her soul as she slides across the room, challenging Ryujin to follow her moves, to prove that she is worthy. 

So Ryujin gives in, does what she does best.

Ryujin can’t help the smug grin that starts creeping its way into her lips when Chaeryeong flushes and stares at the ground after she kicks the air and finishes the move with a perfect split. She’s about to tease the girl when the beat changes and Chaeryeong does a flip, then another one, and falls flawlessly into one knee. Holy  , Ryujin allows herself to muse for a second, then Beyoncé’s voice explodes through the speakers again and she remembers it’s her turn to show what she’s got. 

Chaeryeong wants to go for the hard stuff, huh? Ryujin will give her hard, then.

A backflip, an arm swing, a footwork that will leave her limping when she goes back to the dorms later — Ryujin does it all. Chaeryeong does it too, with a graciousness that Ryujin envies. Not that she would ever admit that to the devil's child herself, no. She would rather cut her own tongue out than give Lee Chaeryeong any sort of compliment.

Which is funny, because when the beat is about to change again and Ryujin pushes herself off of the floor — without the use of her hands, one of the techniques she used to struggle the most with — and finds herself face to face with a sweaty Chaeryeong, she malfunctions for a second. Then for another one when she catches Chaeryeong staring at her lips and her own while she’s at it. And once more when—

“Ryujin, I was wondering if—“ Eunbi’s words die on her tongue once she realizes Ryujin is not alone, blushing hard when she sees how close the two girls are, “ Oh , hi, Chaeryeong! I didn’t know you were here too!”

And just like that the moment between them — can Ryujin even consider that a moment ? Did that actually happen? — is over.

Ryujin isn’t even sure when Chaeryeong goes from being mere inches away from her face to collecting her stuff at the other side of the room, throwing Eunbi a hurried hi, unnie, I was just about to leave, see you tomorrow before she’s out the door, leaving a stunned Ryujin behind. 

It doesn’t take too long for Sojung to appear at the door, because of course she would, her and Eunbi are attached by the hip, and she frowns as she watches Chaeryeong stumble her way out of the practice room. 

“Uh, is anyone going to explain what’s going on, or?”

Ryujin opens to declare that no need to worry, absolutely nothing happened but Eunbi beats her to it. “Ryujin and Chaeryeong,” Eunbi deadpans, blinks, “Were so close to each other. Like, they looked two seconds away from kissing—“

“No!” Ryujin cuts her, mentally cursing herself for how flustered she sounds and looks, “You got it all wrong! We were— we were just— fighting. Yeah, fighting.”

The duo doesn’t look convinced, but chooses to let the topic die with a shrug. Ryujin releases a breath she had no idea she was holding in the first place. 

Eunbi snaps her fingers when she remembers the reason why she came looking for Ryujin in the first place. “Oh, right. Do you want to have some ice cream with us?”

Ryujin is exhausted. The adrenaline is slowly leaving her body and it’s starting to become painfully obvious to herself that, maybe, she pushed herself a little too hard with this whole dance battle thing. ing Lee Chaeryeong and her stupid ideas . But at the same time she desperately needs a distraction to forget… whatever it was that had happened between the two of them before Chaeryeong flew out of the room, and there’s also the fact that she can’t say no to free ice cream. Or to anything that Eunbi asks her with that adorable voice, really.

“Yeah, ice cream sounds good,” Ryujin offers the woman a smile, “Wait for me outside? I’ll just take a quick shower.”

“Sure!” Eunbi intertwines her arm with Sojung’s, turning to Ryujin one last time before she closes the door, “Don’t take too long, okay?”

Ryujin nods, and then she’s alone. 

She stares at her worn out reflection in the mirror, remembers the way Chaeryeong her lips, thinks:  my life, this world, Lee Chaeryeong , and screams into her hands.

 

ryujin

thanks for the medicine you big sap

yeoreum

mhm

why are u up at 2am tho

ryujin

nothing

yeoreum

shin ryujin

ryujin

it’s nothingggg :<

yeoreum

alright… if you say so

 

After tossing and turning on the bed for God knows how long, Ryujin gets up to make herself a cup of hot tea. She squints her eyes as she stares at the clock on the wall and realizes it’s four in the morning.

She wants to scream her lungs out. But she doesn’t want to be kicked out of the dorms, so she bites her tongue, holds all of her frustrations and questions back.

Where is her favorite Kuromi mug, anyway? She clearly told Yeji not to touch it. Yeji wouldn’t be crazy enough to touch it, right?

 

Ryujin is sprawled on the floor after practice, giggling to herself as she records Sooyoung running around the room with an overjoyed Heejin on her back while Jungeun chases after the two, begging for them to stop because Sooyoung is old, she can crack a bone and we can’t win the competition without her . Ryujin is about to jump into the teasing when her phone vibrates with a new message from an unknown number. She frowns, pauses the video and clicks on the notification. 

 

unknown

ryujin?

ryujin

… who are you

unknown

chaeryeong.

 

Ryujin nearly lets her phone drop on her face.

 

ryujin

HOW TF DO YOU HAVE MY NUMBER

unknown

i got it from jisu.

ryujin

and for WHAT

unknown

meet me at building f room 5 today at 6pm.

 

Ryujin scoffs. The audacity .

 

ryujin

why would i do that

unknown

i don’t know if you realized, but...

we don’t have a winner yet.

 

Ryujin pushes herself up into a sitting position so fast that her head starts spinning. Or is it because she thought about the way Chaeryeong blatantly stared at her lips the day before? Ryujin has no idea, to be honest.

So much for trying to forget about their little moment by practicing like a mad woman, huh?

 

ryujin

um

what about… no

unknown

i’ll take the studio at night, then.

ryujin

no you won’t

unknown

i will, since you’re being a .

 

Ryujin snorts as she reads the message over and over again. Did Lee Chaeryeong just call her a ? 

 

unknown

afraid to lose, ryujin?

 

That’s the final straw.  it , Ryujin thinks, and starts typing furiously.

 

ryujin

6pm right?

i’ll be there

let’s see if you’ll still act all high and mighty when i end you

unknown

i’ll be waiting. don’t be late.

 

Ryujin is too busy digging holes at the screen of her phone to notice Yeji is now sitting next to her, wearing the signature worried best friend look on her face. Ryujin startles when Yeji’s hand touches her exposed shoulder, hiding her phone under her leg before she turns to the other girl and nudges her arm, “Hey. How was it with Jisu?”

The worry vanishes from Yeji’s face when she hears her girlfriend’s name. Cute . “It was great. She’s so great. Sometimes I can’t believe she’s mine.”

“Gross,” Ryujin fake gags, but the fond smile on her face betrays her.

There’s a comfortable silence between them after the brief exchange of words, both distracted by the view of Yuna running for her life while Gahyeon promises she’s going to become an assassin once she catches her. 

Until Yeji touches her shoulder again, and the look returns to her face. Oh no.

Yeji tilts her head to the side. “Are you okay?”

That’s the thing about the two of them. Call it soulmate energy or whatever, but they always know when something is up with the other without having to say a thing. Thankfully, Ryujin knows Yeji like the back of her hand — it’s impossible not to, after fifteen years of friendship and everything — so she knows exactly how to escape from a conversation when she doesn’t feel like talking about her silly feelings and thoughts.

Even more now that her silly feelings and thoughts revolve around Lee Chaeryeong. How embarrassing would that be? Ryujin doesn’t have the energy to go through that.

“To be honest, I’m not,” Ryujin announces and throws Yeji the coldest glare she can manage, “Do you know what happened to my Kuromi mug?”

Yeji goes pale. Of ing course. The culprit had to be her empty-headed best friend.

“I’m sorry, it’s just—“ Yeji struggles to find the right words, gesturing desperately with her hands, “It was there, I wanted some milk, and it was just so cute. But I heard a loud sound and I let it slip from my hands.”

Ryujin rolls her eyes. “I told you not to touch it, didn’t I?”

“I’m sorry, okay? I—“ Yeji shuts , thinks for a second, then snaps her fingers, “I’ll buy you a new one!”

“You better,” Ryujin states as she gets up, running a hand through her hair in an attempt to fix it, then she claps to catch the attention of the rest of the team and stands in front of the mirror, “Break is over, ladies. Time to break some bones!”

 

After two hours of practice, pushing herself to her limit and making fun of Yeoreum after she says she has a date with Yeonjung again (“Jesus, Yeoreum. You’re so whipped for this girl.” “Shut the up, Shin Ryujin. I know stuff about you that you don’t want the others to know.”), Ryujin finds herself in the bathroom, fresh out of the shower, staring at her phone like she wants it to explode. 

Maybe she does, because that would be a good excuse to not show up. Hey, Chaeryeong, I didn’t come because my phone exploded. She can’t call Ryujin a for that.

But her phone remains the same, so Ryujin sighs, throws herself on the bed and groans against her pillow. She doesn’t know what she’s getting herself into, but she knows that she doesn’t like it. 

So Ryujin decides that she is going to win this battle, no matter what. She’s going to give her all — her blood, sweat and tears. Who cares if she dislocates a joint? At least she won’t have to see Chaeryeong’s stupid face for a long, long time.

Suddenly Ryujin feels like a train of motivation ran over her, so she gets up, checks herself in the mirror — she looks good, great — and leaves without looking back.

Just you wait, Lee Chaeryeong.

 

The room is completely dark when Ryujin arrives.

Ryujin grins. This means she got here before Chaeryeong, which is great, because that means she’ll have some time to stretch in peace before the girl bursts through the door and drives her insane. She pats the wall, struggling for a second until she finds the switch, pressing the button and—

“F— Oh my God, Chaeryeong!”

—and Ryujin nearly dies on the spot.

“You’re early,” Chaeryeong speaks calmly, as if she hadn’t scared the living out of Ryujin, and pushes herself up, “Warm up and then we can start.”

Ryujin scoffs, her limbs still a bit shaky. “Are we not going to talk about how you were sitting at the corner like a ghost or something?”

“Afraid of me, Ryujin?” Chaeryeong says while she stretches one leg, her foot almost touching the back of her head. Ryujin stares for a second, gulps, and fixates her gaze somewhere else.

“N-no,” Ryujin squeezes her eyes shut and curses herself mentally at least a thousand times for stuttering in front of Chaeryeong, then continues, “I just thought I was alone. And who sits alone in a dark room in complete silence?” Ryujin rolls her eyes, whispers, “ Weirdo .”

“I heard that,” Chaeryeong throws Ryujin a piercing glare over her shoulder, “And the answer is obvious. Me. I do,” she deadpans, mutters something under her breath when she switches to the other leg that Ryujin doesn’t catch, “Plus, I had my earphones on. So I wasn’t in complete silence.”

“Look at her, she’s so smart and edgy,” Ryujin says in the most annoying, childish tone she can come up with while stretching her arms, “What else do you do? Chill at cemeteries at night?”

Without missing a beat, Chaeryeong blurts out, “That sounds like a you thing.”

Okay. Maybe her and Yeji used to go to cemeteries at night when they were teenagers to take some goth pictures for tumblr. But it’s not like anyone needs to know about that — teenidleryu and theyeji1975 have been brutally murdered and buried in 2015 and they want it to stay that way, thank you very much.

“Enough talking,” Ryujin cracks her fingers, then turns to Chaeryeong who’s looking too confident for someone that’s about to be crushed, “Let’s get it started, shall we?”

Chaeryeong nods, and Ryujin wants to wipe that snobby grin out of her face. She watches silently as the girl connects her phone to the speakers and picks a song, smiling to herself when the first notes of a hip hop song she’s familiar with fills the room, her thoughts becoming clouded with nothing but the urge she feels to teach Chaeryeong a lesson.

Ryujin applies the same techniques from the day before to her moves, but she moves faster now; sharper, stronger, almost viciously. Adrenaline pumps through her veins as she circles around Chaeryeong like a vampire that hasn’t tasted blood in years, feeling lightheaded when Chaeryeong abruptly pokes her shoulder with her index finger, causing her to lose balance for a second. 

Chaeryeong sees the opportunity to take over and grabs it, eyes darkening as her feet slide on the floor like it’s made of ice. She switches from delicate movements to strong ones with ease, owning that freestyle dance as if it was a choreography she’s been practicing for her entire life.

Ryujin clenches her jaw at the view in front of her. Chaeryeong is stuck-up, bratty and something else Ryujin doesn’t want to admit. In other words, Ryujin hates her.

Which is why Ryujin doesn’t understand why her body floats towards the girl, or why Chaeryeong grabs her by the arms and pulls her closer, or why they’re kissing instead of battling.

The worst thing about the fact that they’re kissing is that Ryujin likes it — god , she likes it so much. It’s hard not to when Chaeryeong seems to know exactly what she’s doing, holding her waist with one hand while the other caresses her back under her shirt, sending goosebumps down her spine.

Chaeryeong tastes of caramel macchiato, lipgloss and strawberry cake. The thought makes Ryujin want to laugh because she expected the girl to taste of everything she hates the most in the world, but turns out it’s quite the opposite. She holds the urge back, though, because laughing means stopping and the last thing she wants right now is for Chaeryeong to stop whatever it is that she’s doing to her body and mind. 

But they’re humans and need air to survive, so they have to pull apart. 

Ryujin takes her time to take in the way Chaeryeong looks — forehead glistening with sweat, lips parted, eyes a shade darker. She looks so— she looks almost—

“I have to go.”

“Beauti— wait, what ?”

Chaeryeong her lips, trying to contain a giggle. Ryujin’s eyes follow the movement and it makes her head feel a little funny. “I said I have to go.”

Ryujin’s soul hasn’t returned to her body yet, so the only thing she can do is blink. “O-Okay.”

Chaeryeong brings her thumb up to clean the smudged lip gloss at the corner of Ryujin’s mouth, throws her a smirk, fixes her hair in the mirror, and then the door shuts. 

Ryujin rests her back against the wall, drags a hand through her face, and lets her body slide dramatically to the floor.

 

Ryujin is still out of it when she gets to the dorms. 

She has no idea how she got home in one piece considering the amount of times she stumbled over tables and random students — Jungeun nearly jumped her in the middle of the cafeteria for bumping into her shoulder and making her drop her precious lemonade, but she realized Ryujin was on the verge of death and had some mercy — but now that she’s alone she’ll make sure to take a long shower and sleep until she forgets the way Chaeryeong’s hand felt against her skin and—

Ryujin fights the urge to scream out of frustration when she opens the door and finds Yeji and Jisu in the middle of a heated make out session. Great, my day couldn’t get any better , Ryujin thinks as she throws her backpack on the floor, successfully startling the couple.

“O-Oh, hi, Ryujin,” Yeji laughs shakily, scratching the back of her neck, “What are you doing here?”

“What do you mean what am I doing here, Hwang Yeji?” Ryujin scoffs, flicks Yeji’s forehead and fights back a giggle when the girl whines, “I live here, remember?” Ryujin rolls her eyes, then turns to the third person in the room and offers her a sweet smile, “Hi, Jisu.”

“Hi,” Jisu mumbles, not being able to meet Ryujin’s gaze. Her face is burning red. Ryujin thinks she’s adorable.

Then she remembers Jisu is Chaeryeong’s best friend, and the thought is enough to make her feel dizzy, so she excuses herself — even though she wanted to stay and make fun of Yeji for an entire hour —  and locks herself in the bathroom. 

There, with water falling over her head and washing away the sweat on her skin, it’s when it starts to sink in. Chaeryeong kissed her, she kissed Chaeryeong back. And, of course, the worst part of this mess she got herself into: she liked being kissed by Chaeryeong, enjoyed having her hands under her shirt and her finger at the corner of her lips. Which makes no sense, because as far as Ryujin knows, they hate each other. They’ve been on each other’s throats since day one, when they unfortunately got into that godforsaken convenience store at the same time.

So why the hell did Chaeryeong kiss her?

Ryujin considers the possibility of this being a stupid bet made by Chaeryeong’s stupid team. She wouldn’t be that childish, would she? Of course she would, she’s Chaeryeong . Then she considers the scenario where Chaeryeong kissed her simply because she wanted to, and that makes Ryujin freak out. If she wasn’t so afraid of being kicked out of the building for multiple noise complaints she would be screaming her lungs out right now.

There’s no way, right? Ryujin knows she’s attractive, it’s hard not to with all the love letters that were shoved into her locker back in high school, but Lee Chaeryeong out of all people being attracted to her? There’s no way that’s the case. 

Ryujin knows Chaeryeong would rather die than feel anything other than hatred towards her. She knows it because that’s the way she thinks, too.

Which goes against the way her body shivers while she’s drying her hair and her brain keeps reminding her of how good of a kisser Chaeryeong is.

Ryujin groans into the damp towel. “This is ridiculous.”

She reaches out for the clothes she left in the bathroom before she left earlier — for some reason she knew she wouldn’t be in her right mind once she returned, so she made sure to make everything easier for her —, puts them on and unlocks the door, frowning when she finds Yeji alone, no trace of Jisu left behind.

“She’s gone?” Ryujin asks as she jumps on her bed, sighing in contentment as her body melts over the soft sheets.

Yeji shrugs, not even looking up from her phone screen. “She was about to leave when you got here.”

Ryujin raises an accusing eyebrow, “Are you sure about that?”

Yeji grabs a pillow and throws it straight into Ryujin’s face. Ryujin doesn’t even think of fighting back because she’s exhausted and because she knows she totally deserved it. Sometimes she wonders how Yeji puts up with her on a daily basis without going insane.

“Anyway,” Yeji starts, “Jisu’s hosting a party this weekend and we’re going.”

“Do I have to?” Ryujin whines, “You know parties aren’t my thing.”

“Yes, you have to,” Yeji rolls her eyes, placing her phone on the nightstand before looking at Ryujin, “It will be nice, I promise,” she puts on her best pout, “It won’t hurt to have some fun, you know?”

Ryujin sighs. Yeji knows damn well she can’t resist her cute pout and never hesitates to use it to get anything she wants from her best friend. “Will our team be there?”

“All of them,” Yeji nods, smiling from ear to ear. 

“Fine,” Ryujin deadpans, then points at Yeji with a glare, “But I’m not staying for too long, understood?”

“Yes, captain,” Yeji has a triumphant smile on her face and Ryujin can only roll her eyes at the scene. Yeji is one year older than her but she can act like a five year old child when she wants to.

There’s silence between them after that, and Ryujin is already drifting into dreamland when her eyes flash open, a chill running down her spine as realization downs on her.

Chaeryeong will be at the party.

Ryujin chokes on her own saliva. Yeji runs to the freezer and returns with a cup of water, a concerned expression painting her face. Ryujin feels like she’s two seconds away from throwing up.

 .

 

The week before the party is pretty uneventful.

Ryujin practices until her bones are aching, stays in the studio for longer than she should (Yeji tries to get her to stop, but Ryujin is stubborn) and Yeoreum gives her endless packs of natural medicine through Sojung. 

The team is hyped for the weekend. The girls can’t stop talking about what they’re going to wear, what time they are leaving and whose houses they are going to crash at after all the fun ends. Ryujin hates to be a party pooper, she really does, but she’s constantly reminding them that they’re a few weeks away from one of the most important competitions of their lives and that they shouldn’t do anything too crazy. The last time the entire team went to one of Jisu’s parties together Sooyoung and Gahyeon tried to jump into the pool from the balcony and, well , Ryujin is still traumatized, to say the least.

Then there’s the whole kissing Chaeryeong thing.

Ryujin is trying not to think about it. Chaeryeong doesn’t give a about what happened, didn’t even bother to send her a text the whole week, so Ryujin does the same. 

The lack of interaction between the two of them makes Ryujin wonder if, maybe, kissing Chaeryeong was simply something that she had imagined. But the chill that creeps down her spine every time her mind mocks her with the image of Chaeryeong’s finger brushing the corner of reminds her that yes, everything was real.

And that Chaeryeong chose to act like it wasn’t.

Ryujin has no idea why the silence bothers her so much. She hates Chaeryeong — hates her in the same intensity that she hates hot summer days, which is a lot —, hates when the girl and her stupid face and her shiny hair disturb her peace, hates it even when she breathes near her, so why the hell does Ryujin care?

She convinces herself that it’s because it’s rude to act like the person you kissed like your whole life depended on it doesn’t exist. Even when said person hates your guts, and you hate theirs in the same way, maybe even more. Yeah, that’s definitely it. Ryujin adds impolite to the endless list of reasons why she hates Chaeryeong.

Ryujin tries to throw a crumpled paper ball into Chaeryeong’s impolite head one day when they end up having a class together. Yeji grabs her wrist and flashes her a look that screams do it and I’ll kill you , so Ryujin has no choice but to give up on her plan. She still spends the entire lecture huffing and puffing and wishing she could get up to give Chaeryeong a piece of her mind, though.

The class ends and Ryujin all but storms out of the room, ignoring Yeji’s protests and going straight into the studio, ready to dance her emotions away because she’s angry for something she knows she shouldn’t be and she wants it to stop before she loses her mind.

(Ryujin misses how Chaeryeong’s eyes follow her steps and how her face twists with something that looks a lot like worry.)

 

It’s midnight on a Saturday, and here Ryujin is — surrounded by a bunch of drunk college students when she could be in her bed watching YouTube videos with weird titles and even weirder thumbnails. On one hand there is a half empty cup with something Yeoreum got her from the bar — it tastes like strawberry, which Ryujin loves, but she isn’t a huge fan of alcohol so it takes a while for her to finish one cup — and in the other there’s her phone. She scrolls mindlessly through her instagram feed, presses like on a few posts — Jesus, is that a picture of Yeji and Jisu kissing? Gross — and shoves the device back on her pocket.

Ryujin decides to observe what’s happening around her instead. Okay, beside her there is Yeoreum, pouting because Yeonjung got stuck in traffic and hasn’t arrived yet. At the other side of the room she can see a few of her seniors, Eunbi and Sojung included, laughing at some silly joke one of them said. She turns her head to the group of people near the bar and cringes when she sees Gahyeon trying to flirt with Kim Yoohyeon, one of Jisu's closest friends. When will she stop? Ryujin thinks to herself, then she remembers that Gahyeon doesn’t stop until she gets exactly what she wants, so the answer is never .

Then she allows her eyes to wander around the sea of people dancing in the middle of the room, ready to point and laugh at an insane amount of smashed people trying to look cool and— 

Oh no .

Her eyes fall on Chaeryeong for the first time since she arrived. And the worst part is that Chaeryeong was already looking at her. 

Ryujin hates to admit it, but Chaeryeong looks good tonight. The girl is wearing high heels, her long hair is falling over her shoulders and she’s dressed in a sparkling black dress that probably costs more than both of Ryujin’s kidneys — Lee Chaeryeong is a sight for sore eyes with a carefree smile on her face and neon lights shining brighter than the stars outside against her skin. 

Then a smirk blooms at the corner of her red lips, and Ryujin realizes that she’s staring. Not simply staring, but staring staring, in the same way you look at someone to let them know you want to get out of a crowded place and find somewhere quiet to be with them without having to say a word. Which Ryujin absolutely doesn’t want to.

Chaeryeong’s smirk grows. She excuses herself from her group of friends, disappears into the crowd, and soon enough Ryujin feels her phone vibrate inside of her pocket. 

 

unknown

meet me in the bathroom.

2nd floor.

don’t take too long.

 

Ryujin scoffs. She doesn’t want this.

 

ryujin

what makes you think i want to be with you? lmao

unknown

don’t come, then.

 

Ryujin groans.  , maybe she wants this. And maybe she wants it a lot.

 

ryujin

…

i’m omw

 

Ryujin gives Yeoreum the half-assed excuse that she needs to go outside for a while and rushes to the second floor, thanking the heavens that most people are too busy dancing or making out with their partners to give a about where’s she’s going or ask her why is her face so red.

Ryujin is starting to realize how much of a fool she is for this. She spent the whole week mad at Chaeryeong for not speaking to her, but the second she got a stupid text asking to meet at some bathroom in this gigantic house Jisu rented she immediately gave in to Chaeryeong’s request. What is she? A lovesick teenager?

You’re twenty now, Shin Ryujin. You shouldn’t give in so easily just because Chaeryeong is pretty and a good kisser , Ryujin tries to reprimand herself, but the second she opens the door and finds Chaeryeong reapplying bright red lipstick to her lips, her brain shuts down and she forgets how to behave like a normal human being for a second, because holy  —

“You actually came,” Chaeryeong’s voice snaps Ryujin out of her trance, “I thought you would chicken out.”

“I’m not the one that spent a whole week acting like a coward,” Ryujin shoots back without missing a beat. 

Chaeryeong rests her back against the sink and crosses her arms over her chest. “I wasn’t the only one.”

Ryujin gulps and looks away. That’s… true , yes, but it’s not like Ryujin was about to admit that to Lee Chaeryeong of all people. So she rolls her eyes and decides to go straight to the point instead, “Why did you ask me to come here?”

Chaeryeong takes one step closer to Ryujin. Then another. Then one more. She’s now standing right in front of Ryujin, and Ryujin swears she tries not to, but she can’t stop staring at Chaeryeong’s lips as the girl places a finger under her chin and blurts out, “Isn’t it obvious?”

it , Ryujin thinks, and wraps her arms around Chaeryeong’s neck. She has to stand on her toes now because of Chaeryeong’s high heels, and she would be lying if she said that the height difference didn’t make her heart flutter, even if just a little.

Ryujin kisses Chaeryeong first this time. Then again, and again, and again.

 

Ryujin finds herself sitting beside Chaeryeong at a balcony minutes later. 

Turns out Jisu gave Chaeryeong a key to a special bedroom because, according to Chaeryeong herself, her battery dies quickly at parties. Ryujin finds it hard to believe someone like Chaeryeong could get tired in such a lively party — she expected the girl to go back downstairs and have fun for the rest of the night after they were done making out, but Ryujin decided not to say anything. It’s none of her business, after all. 

There’s little to no people in the garden they're now contemplating in silence. Which is perfect, because the last thing they want is for any of their friends to see the two of them together. That would be weird and embarrassing. So, so damn embarrassing.

Ryujin was about to comment on how beautiful the moon looks tonight when Chaeryeong gets up from the chair and puts her elbows over the railing. Ryujin is not sure why but she follows her, keeping a safe distance between them. She’s afraid they’ll end up kissing again if they get too close — not that she doesn’t want it, because she does even though she hates to admit it, but because she’s not about to make out with Chaeryeong on a balcony. It’s one thing to kiss in a bathroom and it’s another to kiss underneath the stars. That’s way too intimate, isn’t it?

“You know,” Chaeryeong starts quietly, “This is the first party Jisu hosts ever since she got a girlfriend.”

Ryujin frowns, not sure what direction this conversation is going. Wait, are they really about to have a conversation? Oh God . “Yes?”

Chaeryeong sighs. “It’s so weird. I’m supposed to be sad, but I just… don’t?”

Ryujin’s frown deepens. “Why would you be sad?”

Chaeryeong turns to look at Ryujin, an unreadable expression taking over her face. “Can I tell you a secret?”

Ryujin raises an eyebrow. “Why would you tell me out of all people a secret?”

“Because I know you won’t tell anyone.”

Ryujin scoffs, fighting the urge to roll her eyes to the back of her head. “And what makes you think I won’t?”

“Because if you do I’ll tell everyone we kissed,” Chaeryeong explains with an evil smirk on her lips, “And I know you don’t want that to happen.”

 . “Alright,” Ryujin sighs, lifting her hands up in surrender, “Go ahead.”

Chaeryeong’s eyes go back to gazing at the colorful flowers underneath them. “I’m in love with Jisu— was , actually,” Chaeryeong corrects herself with a bitter chuckle, “That’s the problem. Loving her was all I’ve ever known, now I feel so… empty? Lost?” She plays with her fingers for a while as she contemplates her next words, then decides to stare at the moon instead. “They say you’re defined by what you love. Who am I now that I don’t love Jisu anymore?”

Ryujin is speechless. She’s pretty sure she forgot how to breathe for a second or two during Chaeryeong’s monologue. 

Chaeryeong is— was in love with her best friend’s girlfriend. At the same time it blows Ryujin’s mind, the revelation makes a lot of sense. Chaeryeong being in love with Jisu explains so much about her odd behavior that it makes Ryujin’s head spin like a wheel.

First, the convenience store incident. Ryujin was there to grab chocolate milk for her best friend, but Chaeryeong was there for the light of her days, the apple of her eyes, the love of her life or something like that. Don’t get her wrong, Ryujin loves Yeji with all of her heart, but now she understands that things were harder for Chaeryeong on that fateful night. The girl she loved was crying for another girl, which means that Chaeryeong was absolutely heartbroken, but she still wanted to make Jisu feel better. 

The fire in Chaeryeong’s eyes, the firm grip on that silly box, the desperation in her tone — Ryujin thinks she understands it now.

Because that’s what love is, right? Making sure the person you love is happy even if you’re miserable. 

Second, Yeji would always whine to her about how scary Jisu’s best friend was and about how convinced she was that the girl hated her. Well, that explains a lot. Chaeryeong probably did hate Yeji at some point. The hatred seems to be in the past now — the two of them get along pretty well, much to Ryujin’s chagrin. She lost count of how many times she had screamed into her pillow in rage when Yeji would go out with Chaeryeong. Not that she would ever tell Yeji about that, though. Her best friend has every right to go out with whoever she wants. her and her pointless fights with Chaeryeong, she’ll deal with her pettiness by herself.

It’s only when Chaeryeong fakes a cough that Ryujin is shaken out of her thoughts, finally realizing that she hadn’t said anything after Chaeryeong poured out her feelings to her. Uh oh . She probably looks stupid right now.

“I’m pretty sure there’s other things you love,” Ryujin starts carefully as she studies Chaeryeong’s expression, “It’s impossible to love just one thing in the world. Or someone.”

Chaeryeong ponders for a while, drumming her fingers against the railing. Then, after a few seconds of silence, her eyes light up and a small smile makes its way to her lips. “I love dancing.”

Ryujin allows herself to relax a little at the mention of her passion, smiling shyly as she says, “You and me both.”

Chaeryeong steals a glance at Ryujin, then quickly adverts her eyes to the ground. “Dancing is the only thing keeping me grounded right now, to be honest,” she pauses for a moment, “the only thing reminding me that I’m here, that I’m alive,” Chaeryeong laughs quietly, and it sounds so vulnerable that Ryujin wonders if she was even allowed to hear it, “I sound stupid, don’t I?”

“No!” Ryujin