ONE

JANUARY 2020.

“What are we having for our one and only meal for the day today?” Hina asked. “I don’t know, it has been so long since I last went to the cafeteria”. Estelle said whilst looking at her manager with an obvious pleading look.

“Oh, come on oppa, let her go today. She has been losing more than 2.5kg for her upcoming project, she has no more fats to burn”. Hina pleads.

“Do whatever Estelle, except for going to the cafeteria”. said Ha Jun oppa sternly.

Estelle rolled her eyes and keep on doing the dance routine, “I swear you are gonna lose that curve on your body” Hina scoffed.

“I will go and buy what you want to eat, stay here” Ha Jun then said again.

Both Hina and Estelle looking at him puzzled. “What’s the matter now, oppa? I can actually eat but going to the cafeteria is a problem now?” “You didn’t understand, I will go and buy you food”

“Make me understand then”.

Ha Jun sighed and take a sit on the couch, gesturing for both Hina and Estelle to come near him. “There are rumors about you and Renjun” “What kind?” “Duh, they are obviously saying both of you, you know like uhm dating?” Hina said unconsciously.

Estelle sighed, not knowing what to say to her manager because she knew the rumors about her could never go off and she admits that it could also be she is the reason why. She let her manager and Hina went off to the cafeteria and went for her routine again.

She could not even get the beats right. “Is he going to be okay though?” Estelle stops the music and starts wandering around the practice room.

“Should I ask him..”  Estelle keeps on contemplating whether she needs to text him or not.

Estelle’s POV

As I was about to reach for my phone, the door of the practice room opened, “Oppa, is he there?” “Oppa?” I looked at the guy by the door and yes, he is not my manager.

“What are you doing here?” I asked. “There is no wrong to be here though” he said whilst walking towards me, “Here, it’s for you, Ha Jun hyung asked me to give it to you”.

“Are you for real?” Renjun nodded and take a seat beside me, unpacking the foods he brought.

“Let’s eat”.

I looked at him settling down with the foods, I was hesitating to eat with him, in the trainees’ practice room, what if someone came in and got the wrong idea? I sighed.

“No one is going to come in and stop sighing and please just eat”.

“Yah, I don’t want us to be awkward around each other you know” Renjun said.

“I am not being awkward with you right now but its just disturbing. What if this rumor reaches out to your fans? You know that will be the very first dating rumor for NCT and you are in dream for god’s sake”.

Renjun does not say anything, “Here, open your mouth” “I am kinda serious right now”

“I know. I know that but let’s eat first and we will talk about it”.

I felt so bad for him. This kind of rumor is very disadvantageous for idols, I am well aware of that. “Are you going to be okay?” I looked at him, he turns around facing me.

“We both know how much of a disaster this is but still, I am not willing to lose you as my friend just because of this groundless rumor. Please, let’s be okay together. We know the truth, the hyungs, everyone knew what we actually are. Do not worry about me. You too, have your own name to protect”, whilst caressing my hair.

“I am different. You are an idol, I am an actress. This rumor would not affect me as bad as it will affect you”

“Hey, whatever happens, I will be there for you. Promise me, we will be there for each other?”

“I can’t help worrying about you”

I went to pack my things because I have a script reading session to attend, Renjun helped me tidy up the place whilst saying “Me too. I am hell worried about you as well so please, eat well and do not ever ponder about this rumor, we know better”.

I looked at the back of his body as he is not facing me- focused on clean up the place. We are nothing more than just bestfriend. We have known each other for like 5 years and I admit that people could easily misunderstand our relationship by how we communicate. I feel comfortable around him, I might be close with the others as well but there is no one like him.

There is someone else that I could not help worry about too, someone who is very dear to me, someone that I hoped would never came across this rumor.

“Are you heading somewhere?” Renjun asked

“I have a script reading session to attend, they need to see more of my capability”

“Is that going to be your next project?”

“If I able to secure the line up, then I guess it is my next project”

“What is it about? Thriller again?”

I nodded. “What? I am positive there is much more genres being offered to you?”

I laughed, looking at his reaction every time after he knew that I’ll be acting in thriller is hilarious. “This time is a little bit different, won’t tell you, stay tuned”. I winked at him and he is obviously disgusted by it.

The door opened, “Are you done yet? The traffic will be bad by now, let’s go”

“See you later, Injun-ah”, we waved each other goodbye.

“How was it talking to him?” Ha Jun oppa asked.

“Not much difference, you know he is very damn positive about every single thing, he asked me not to worry because all of us know better? I could never understand him being positive all the time”.

“You need someone who is like him, you worry too much. But, you know it’s not true so why would you worry though?” we get in the car and I started to practices my lines.

“I really don’t know how to explain what kind of worries do I have. That’s okay, let’s just go”. People can never understand your worries. The fact that both of us is just 20, the truth that I am an idol trainee but now a six years old actress, the fact that Renjun is in dream makes it all possible that this is a time bomb.

So many chances are there for those who have been wanting either one of us to flop. Dreamies now is at the peak of their career. Why in the world would I want to ruin that? I take out my phone and started to text Renjun.

“Hey, I guess I know what to do”.

A few minutes passed and I still haven’t got a reply from him as I arrived at the script reading venue.

“Oppa, you don’t have to come with me, that’s okay, I will be fine”. “Okay then, I will get some of the groceries that your sister asked me to buy”. “Thank you, oppa!!”

I went up to the 9^th floor where the script writer, director and producer are. Today, it will be just me and them. This project is totally different from what I’ve been doing before and I could not help but excited for it. As I arrived, I greeted them.

“Estelle! How have you been?” the director asked, “Good I guess?” I chuckle.

“Okay, as you know, we would want to see how you portray the character as we all know that this character is really not you so I hope you will be able to surprise the viewers”. The script-writer said.

We started the session without further ado. The session is very exhilarating and exhausting I would say, the character that I’ve got for this project is a total opposite of my personal traits. This project is a medical series and the genre is romance-thriller which is so not me. In six years, I’ve never ever been on a romance genre, this would be my very first time and I could not help but worry.

I still didn’t know who is the other casts are and that is why I am nervous to death. Four hours passed. My throat is going dry after moving from one scene to another- this series is very very very promising and fun.

“As I read through the script, this series seems to be very exciting” I exclaimed.

“So, three of us has agree that we think you are the most suitable for this character” the director said and I could not help but smile.

“Thank you for trusting me, I will give my all”

“You better do! The other casts are not yet confirmed but as for now, your partner would be Kang Min Hyuk CNBLUE, have you met him?”

“Kang Min Hyuk sunbaenim? No, I’ve never met him but I guess we would be alright?”

“No worries, he is very nice and friendly, easy-going as well!” the script-writer said.

“Then, I guess that is all for today?” the director asked, “We will see you in two weeks, Estelle!” “Yes, sure, thank you.”

“Oppa? Are you downstairs?”

“Yes, come on, let’s go back home”

I rushed downstairs as today is very exhausting, physically, emotionally- I sprinted to the car and my manager didn’t say anything and the next thing I know is that I arrived my house as I was in a deep sleep in the car. As I was about to go out, “Your sister won’t be at home for a week I guess, so are you okay?”

“Yes, I know, she told me earlier this morning, the groceries?”

“I’ve already take it to your house, make sure to eat clean, Estelle”

“Oh my god, okay, they said we will meet in two weeks’ time so I will just go for practice is it in these two weeks?”

Ha Jun oppa nodded and I waved him goodbye because I am totally exhausted. I keyed in the password to my house and went straight to my room to do laundry and take a bath. I changed into my pajama and went to the kitchen- the groceries are all in their respective areas, as expected, Ha Jun is a neat person indeed.

I plopped down on the couch and take a look at my phone- oh . Renjun texted and called me countless of times. I look at the hour shown, right now is 12:37 a.m. I sighed. I should not have put my phone on silent. Goddamn.

I tried calling him and there is no answer.

*Ding dong

I glanced again at the clock by the wall, who’d come here at midnight?