They say that you can tell that you’re dreaming or hallucinating when you’re able to pick out the one detail that just isn’t right. The one detail that is abnormal to your everyday life. Some people hear voices of loved ones who’ve died. Others see people casually walking in the street with shoeless feet.

For Baekhyun, it’s black flowers.

He doesn’t always see them, because they’re quite good at hiding themselves during the hallucinations, but when he sees them he knows that what he thinks is real is not.

The first time he had a hallucination he was in his Chemistry class. Everything was going fine until he saw birds flying into the classroom window and nearly breaking the glass entirely. He fell out of his seat and screamed outright, but no one else seemed to see the birds at all.

The black flowers found themselves on his professor’s desk.

He tried to explain to his friends what happened, but they assumed that he was just being his usual joking self. It took him a full 2 weeks to convince them that he wasn’t joking around this time.                                                

The rumors began to spread that Baekhyun was crazy.

Needless to say, after that incident people began to look at him differently and his 2^nd year of university .

The second time wasn’t long after the first. He was in the library studying when he saw a huge tarantula crawling up the arm of the girl next to him. He tried to subtly inch away from the beast slowly making its way up the girl’s body, but the girl didn’t seem bothered by it in the least.

He kept his mouth closed and stared at the pen in her hand topped with a black flower eraser. He blinked and the next thing he knew, both the spider and the eraser were gone.

Baekhyun kept this to himself.

For the rest of the year he would see things on and off, and more often than not, he would see some kind of black flower somewhere and then he could snap himself out of it. He just had to find the black flowers.

The visions would come to him at the worst times. While he was in the middle of taking his test, he would see his arm falling off. When he was driving his car, the roads would break apart and fire would erupt from the streets (he tries not to drive thanks to the car accident he got into after that one). If he managed to go on a date, their faces would contort into something gruesome. He’d begun to question whether or not his hallucinations were reality and what he once thought was real was just…one long dream or figment of his imagination.

He was beginning to think that he was genuinely in hell.

At that point, Baekhyun checked himself into a mental hospital.

He couldn’t trust his friends, and although he tried convince them, his family wouldn’t believe what he was saying. Telling everyone that he was taking a year off to travel, Baekhyun went to the one place he could think of where his delusions would be taken seriously.

The first day there he had way too many discussions with doctors for him to even keep up with. They all asked the same questions.

What do you think is wrong?

What are your symptoms?

When did it start?

How often do you get these “visions”?

Do you feel as though they are a threat to your safety?

Although he felt as though they were going to use all of the information against him, he answered as truthfully as he could because he wants to get better, and no one else was going to help him.

He was admitted a few hours after that.

“Byun Baekhyun.” Hearing his name, he looks up. He sees the nurse who comes in to deliver medications to all the patients with the straight face that he always wears. For someone who is meant to be helping others, nurse Oh never seems very happy. Baekhyun raises his hand, not getting up from his spot near the window.

He knows the nurse hates when he has to do more work than the minimum, and watching the tall boy scowl in annoyance is just enough to entertain him for the day.

He’s handed a paper cup with 3 different pills. One to stop the visions and two to help fight the side effects of the first. They make him tired, and they only work half the time, but he knows that it’s better than nothing. He swallows down the large pills and opens his mouth for the nurse to see that he’s taken them like a non-problematic patient would.

With a grunt, nurse Oh leaves to hand out medication to the others.

It’s been maybe a few months since he got here; he isn’t sure. The routine is so strict that everyday feels the same and he can’t distinguish between the meal he ate yesterday and the meal he ate a week ago.

He gets called into his group session and listens in silence to everyone talk around him. The therapist facilitates the conversations, and Baekhyun tries his hardest to avoid speaking more than necessary. He doesn’t get the point of the sessions. They only make him feel more trapped here. He wonders if the doctors even plan on letting any of them go.

He’s seen plenty of people come in, in the months that he’s been here, but he hasn’t seen a single person leave.

“Baekhyun?” he looks for the source of his name. The therapist looks at him from his spot lounged in his seat.

“Yes Mr. Kim?” the therapist sighs exasperatedly while the others in the circle laughs quietly.

“I told you to call me Minseok, Baekhyun,” he says with a tired smile. Baekhyun sets his lips in a line before nodding understandingly.

“Alright Mr. Kim.” The other patients chuckle even louder. Baekhyun fights off his winning grin. He thrives on laughter and stirring up issues. Since the hallucinations started he hadn’t been able to get the reactions he wants out of those at his university.

That’s one of the good things about this center.

His name is called and he grabs the cup with his daily pills from the nurse. He grabs his blanket tightly in his hand and wraps it around his shoulders before perching himself in front of the TV in the common room.

A rerun of some old show is playing, and he only half pays attention to it. His focus is interrupted by the girl sitting on the ground next to one of the windows. She’s got her legs crossed and she’s hunched over scribbling furiously on a page that looks a lot like a children’s coloring book, mumbling angrily under her breath.

He’s never seen her here before.

Her name is called out and she snaps up from her spot to look for who called her, Baekhyun quickly averts his eyes when she looks in his direction. He isn’t sure why he’s afraid to make eye contact with her. It wouldn’t be the weirdest thing that she’d encounter in this place.

One of the nicer nurses is the one she gets her medicine from, nurse Kim but everyone calls him by his name. Jongin. He wonders what must be her issue to be given the nicest of the staff assigned to her.

He tries to tune back into the television, but finds it all too hard to not ease drop. He keeps his eyes on the TV but tunes into the conversation with his ears.

He hears Jongin say something about her schedule and her group therapy session. She asks what that is. Jongin explains it simply and he can almost hear the smile in his voice. He welcomes her the facility and then there is silence. Baekhyun strains to listen for more of the conversation and frowns annoyed.

“Were you listening in on my conversation?” startled, Baekhyun jumps away from the girl who had managed to sneak up to him.

“Wha- What? Of course not? What kind of person do you think I am?” he asks incredulously.

She tsks and looks at the television. “You were leaning so far towards us that you almost fell off the couch. Not to mention the TV is off and yet you’re focused on it as if you’re watching the news.” Baekhyun opens his mouth to rebut, but when he realizes that he has accidentally turned the television off when he started to lean in their direction, the words die on his tongue.

He settles for a weak, “Sorry.”

She settles on the cushion next to him silently. Swallowing nervously, Baekhyun turns the television back on. “So, what are you in here for?” she asks not even after 3 seconds of mutual silence with the TV on.

“Schizophrenia. Mainly with visual processing abnormalities,” he says as simply as if he was asked his name. He looks at her. “And you?”

“Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder and occasional Minor Depressive Disorder,” she replies. She smiles too happily for her words. “Nothing major,” she adds. She snorts out a light laugh at her joke and focuses back on the television after having gotten the information she wanted from him.

He laughs awkwardly beside her and faces the TV as well. “So, what’s your name?”

“What?”

“Your name? You know, the thing people typically call you.”

“Oh, uh Baekhyun.”

“Nice to meet you Baekhyun,” she offers him a genuine smile. Before he can ask, she gives him her name.

And that’s how you and Baekhyun met.

Weeks pass and the two of you get closer and the number of people in the hospital start dwindling. You promised that you could help him escape, and he promised to believe you. You’d both seen various patients beginning to disappear with each day and it was setting you both on edge.

Baekhyun hadn’t figured out the pattern yet. He just knew that it was always Dr. Zhang that would come and meet the person, and then at some point they’d go to the back room and never come back. He didn’t know what happened back there, but he knew it wasn’t good. The only way out is through the front door. He’d snuck in and seen the map of the building when Minseok had left his office door open, so he knows.

When Dr. Zhang came to see him for the first time, he knew that he was doomed. No much was said. Dr. Zhang introduced himself with a dimpled smile and an air of fabricated aloofness. Once the doctor was gone, Baekhyun immediately ran to find you.

In whispered voices the two of you began to speculate the reasoning behind the unexplained disappearances. None of the staff seemed to care, and when either of you brought up the name of one of the missing patients, it was as if no one had ever heard of them. You both knew that there was a Park Chanyeol in the building 3 days ago.

It was then that you brought up escape once again. “I promise I know how to get us out of here.”

“You’re bullting me aren’t you?”

“I wouldn’t dare.” Your words were steady, and although Baekhyun was hesitant to believe them, he believed in you. He knew it was slightly ed, having a crush in a mental hospital. He was labeled crazy himself, there was no way he should be having gross romantic, and at times not-so-pure thoughts about another “crazy” person.

That didn’t mean he tried too hard to stop himself. It’s hard not falling for the one person that reminds you of normalcy. The one other person who makes you remember that you weren’t always here and labeled a lunatic by others. It’s even harder to not fall for the one other person around who was able to make him smile and dream of life outside of the hospital again.

He had begun to accept his fate as a permanent resident in the god forsaken place.

So, he listened to your plan. One involving the air ducts and distractions like the ones in the movies. He listened, and knew it was…well, crazy.

But he was desperate.

And you wanted to help.

The plan was to be put in action right before dawn. That way you both could get away and have time to gather distance before the sun was fully in the sky.

You left, and Baekhyun was left to his thoughts in his room. If he got out, where would he go? Would his family just take him back? Would the hospital come looking for him? Would he start to hallucinate again?

Could he convince you to stay with him?

Sleep came easily. It was waking up that was problematic. His mind had come to life, but he couldn’t get his body to follow its command. Through his closed lids he knew there were bright lights. He could hear the voices of people around him. Their words foreign to his ears. Until he could pick out 3 that sent a chill down his spine.

Lobotomy.

Serum.

Powers.

“He’s awake,” he hears a male voice say monotonously. “Tighten the restraints.”

His eyes struggled to open and when they finally peeled apart he was blinded by white light and masked faces. His eyes adjust and he squints trying to recognize the faces around him. He pulls against the thick belts around his wrist and legs, only realizing there was no way to get out on his own when he felt the restraint around his neck.

Tears sprang to his eyes as panic filled his veins like poison.

“He won’t take to the surgery if he’s panicked, give me a minute with him.” You. That was your voice.

“10 minutes,” another male voice says. “This may be your procedure, but we’re still on a schedule.”

“I know Yixing.” Footsteps and mumbling fades as bodies leave the room. You untighten the restraint at his neck and his hands. “Look Baekhyun-”

“Your procedure? You’re a doctor?”

“I’m sorry that I didn’t tell you. You wouldn’t have…been as open with me if you’d know about what I do,” you explain softly. The first tear rolls down his face, slow and fat. Full of betrayal. He’d trusted you. Told you about himself. Told you things he hadn’t dared told his closest friends back home.

But it made sense. The way you were treated in the hospital. You were given liberties the others didn’t have. They were subtle, but they were there. You only talked to him, and he never once actually saw you go to any group sessions.

But it made sense. You were a doctor.

You were a doctor and you chose to dissect him. And he fell for it.“Why?”

“Why what Baekhyun?”

“Why me?”

You were quiet before answering, and the silence only led to a wave of hysteria hitting him. Tears flowed faster and he wanted to scream, but he couldn’t get the actions to come to the surface. “You’re special…your…your schizophrenia is special. Rare. If explored and unleashed properly then you could do great things.

“I do like you Baekhyun. Really. I…” you glance at the door and let out a heavy sigh. “I shouldn’t do this, but I want to give you a chance.” You make quick work of untying the rest of his restraints and removing all of the equipment attached to his body. Baekhyun lies in confusion as you hastily unplug things. “If you manage to get away then they won’t be able to bring you back legally. I’ll say you escaped. Just, hurry while there’s a bit of time. Don’t ask questions, I’m doing you a favor because I want to give you a chance. That’s it.”

He sits up on the metal table with furrowed brows. His clothes gone, nothing but an indecent hospital gown across his body. You motion to the opposite door of where the doctors vanished; he jumps down from the table. “Go,” you whisper nervously. Hesitant steps and an even more hesitant mind, he leaves the room. You smile at him, and he is almost tempted to stay.

But he doesn’t want to be a science experiment.

Metal doors in a dark hallway lead to a thick door at its narrow end. It takes all his energy to push it open, but he’s welcomed with sunlight as it creaks wide.

His steps quicken to a sprint, and Baekhyun runs towards the woods full of excited relief.

They say that you can tell that you’re dreaming or hallucinating when you’re able to pick out the one detail that just isn’t right. The one detail that is abnormal to your everyday life. Some people hear voices of loved ones who’ve died. Others see people casually walking in the street with shoeless feet.

For Baekhyun, it’s black flowers.

As he runs through the brush of the forest in escape, he fails to miss the trail of blackened flowers behind him. The mental fabrication staring the girl in his old chemistry class fades, along with the rest of the world around him.