The aroma of freshly pressed coffee overpowered any unpleasant smell that could be on the 22B morning bus. When it hit my nose, it made me tremble. It smelled delicious... yet dangerous.

I lifted my head to make eye contact with the girl around my age holding the paper cup of coffee, but she seemed insistent on looking out the window. Plan B, I thought while slowly scooting back as far as the length of my arm allowed it and tightened my grip on the handrail to avoid falling over because of the stilettos I decided on the day before, carelessly. I wanted to do everything to not be careless this time around.

 I spent weeks planning what to wear to this special occasion and it showed: I felt comfortable and stylish, the crown jewel of my attire the baby pink teddy coat I snatched at a year-end sale at a store I usually can’t afford to shop in. My free hand unconsciously pulled the jacket together over my chest and I let a small smile slip through my façade of nonchalance. I was over the moon. I felt like I could conquer the world! And all thanks to a fortunate accident...

Before I could reminisce, an old lady sitting on the seat next to me, carefully tapped my elbow:

“Excuse me, miss. Your phone is going off.”

“Oh, you’re right. Thank you!” I said and reached into my handbag to answer the call, so the passengers stop giving me looks for the Taeyeon song it was blasting on full volume. “Hello?”

“Hi, Hyejoo. It’s me, Eunbi.”

“Hi!”

“I know it’s a big day for you, and I want you to enjoy it the fullest, I just called in case you overslept.”

I rolled my eyes good-naturedly while letting people exit by taking a few steps back towards my original place. I waited until another flow of people got on then replied to Eunbi’s remark.

“In case I overslept? I couldn’t close my eyes for a second yesterday, I was so excited.”

“You sound pretty excited to me, even now,” She chuckled, her voice chirpy and upbeat as always. It worked wonders on my nerves, I’m glad she called. “But guess what? You did it. You’re going!”

“I know!” Once realizing I’m being a little louder than I should be, I cleared my throat to regain my composure. “I lucked out. Who would have thought that the roaming photographer I assisted has such connections, and he thought of me when he realized he can’t attend?”

It all seemed like a dream, like the miracle like moment when the fairy godmother appeared in front of Cinderella and told her yes, she can go to the ball. Now, I know I don’t live in a fairytale, and I don’t believe in magical turn of events either; I couldn’t help but feel a bit sentimental towards the gesture.

Eunbi shared my fascination.

“Luck is nothing compared to this, more like fate.”

However, I didn’t share this opinion of hers.

“No, let’s not say that. Fate is... cruel. And it implies I have no control over it. Eunbi, can you hold it for a moment?”

Without further ado, I left my conversation behind in order to offer my help to the old lady, who warned me about my phone, get down the few, however high step of stairs to the crosswalk. She smiled.

“Thank you, my darling.”

“Have a nice day, madam.” I said goodbye to her before the doors closed and I put the phone back to my ear. “I’m back.”

“Okay then, what about- Ah, I just realized!” Eunbi gasped for the dramatic effect and even though I had an inkling of what she is about to say, I felt gratitude when she finished. “Talent. It has to be your talent which attracted him and granted you this opportunity.”

Eunbi has been my biggest cheerleader and critic in one ever since we met in grade school, all throughout high school and to this day. She knows when to cheer me up, when to drag me back to the cold ground of reality, and even more, never misses when to do which.

I slowly leaned on the handrail to rest my forehead next to the cold steel. I felt like burning up, because of the heating and the fire of anticipation keeping me warm both. At the cooling sensation, my eyes fluttered close for a second.

“That’s nice of you to say. And you know what? Yes. Let’s believe it’s because of that. I need a confidence boost before I see all those beautiful garments on the runway and lose all my- Ah!”

“Hyejoo? Is everything okay?”

Eunbi’s worried words went over my head as I was more occupied with staring wide-eyed at the teenager who had just spilled the content of her paper cup over me. Fortunately, most of it landed on the floor of the bus, my shoes safe, however the right side of my pricey coat received a nice, dark stain that was drying quickly in the temperature of the vehicle.

“’sorry.” The girl muttered and before I could get a word out in my taken aback state, she took advantage of the bus lingering at a stop and jumped off, disposing of her now empty paper cup in the process.

Everything happened so quickly, the bus was already towards its next top when I get back to my senses and remembered I’m in the middle of a phone call.

“Hyejoo, are you there?”

“Yes, I am. I just... have an emergency of some sort.”

That was a mild way to put it, but I felt too upset to get into details. Eunbi, as expected, noticed my distress and let me sort it out.

“Alright. Call me back later, when you’re done.”

“I will, definitely. Thanks for calling me.” I said after checking I am at which stop, and which comes next.

“Thank me by having the time of your life. You can do it, Lee Hyejoo!”

I pocketed my phone and let out a deep breath. I kind of felt like crying but the attention I might have gotten from the passengers around me was preventing me from doing so.

I needed to think and needed to think quick – I had roughly an hour until the first show started. I could not attend in a coffee-stained coat, no matter how much money I paid for it and how well it went with my outfit, I made up my mind on that.

But then, what other possibilities I had? Going back home to change? No, I was too far now to go back and make it on time. Going without a coat? Just by looking out the bus window, I could assess it’s too cold and windy in early March to do that. But then, what? There must something else I can do.

The bus took a left turn, reached a square I was way too familiar with, and it was like a lightbulb went out above my head. I haphazardly pressed the STOP button and fastening the strap of my handbag around my chest, I started running as soon as the doors opened.

I got off three stops earlier than planned but for a good reason – three minutes of running later, the café I was supposed to be working at that morning, as well as all mornings, showed up on the horizon and I felt relief flood my whole being. I was so glad I know the location of this place by heart!

Considering the time, café Delight was handling many customers and even more orders: both the outside sitting area with the lavender tablecloths and the inside illuminated by fairy lights no co-worker is allowed to take down, was buzzing with people conversing and sipping on hot drinks, munching on pastries or queuing up for a second serving.

I greeted everyone back who said hello and stood on my tiptoes to check the pace the line was moving forward with. I didn’t want to be rude and cut in but if I had no choice, I was considering making a way for myself.

“You’re looking so hard your eyes are going to pop out at this rate.”

Jongdae’s voice from behind my back came as a surprise, as in a really nice one. I spun around with the speed of lightning.

“Jongdae!”

“Good morning to you too. Aren’t you supposed to be somewhere else right now?” He asked while giving away a pair of cups to a couple sitting at a nearby table. “If you came in for your shift, I’m on my way.”

I gave my co-worker a sheepish look.

“No, I’m very much on my way. I stepped by because I need a favor.”

“I don’t like the sound of that.”

“Believe me, me neither. But I don’t have the luxury of choices...”

I watched Jongdae taking an order one of my hands unconsciously fiddling with the strap of the handbag. I trusted my gut feeling of his ability to help, what I didn’t trust was time ticking down.

Jongdae turned back to me, now with an empty tray, his lips pulling into a smirk. It gave me chills.

“Intriguing. Tell you what, wait for me in the backroom, I’ll have another batch to deliver but I hear you out afterwards.”

“Thank you... Wait, is Minseok in?”

Like my boss would magically appear when his name is called, I quickly checked the area. It would have been awkward running into him after so much convincing to give me the day off.

“He’s working the counter so if I were you, I’d be sneaky.” Jongdae said before slipping back inside through the small gap between the doorframe and the queue, thanks to his lightweight figure.

I took his advice by entering through the back door and making as little noise as possible while doing so. Jongdae showed up a few minutes later and he made sure to close the door soundlessly as well.

“So, what kind of favor you’re looking for?” He asked and sat on the bench in the middle of the small room framed by lockers and cabinets, dimly lit by the single coming from above.

“I have an emergency.”

“You mean...?”

Before he could have finished his sentence, I showed up my coffee-stained coat with an expression of utter devastation.

Jongdae let out a sigh while clasping his small hands together.

“I should have known it’s this kind of emergency when it comes to you.”

His reaction wasn’t as pleasant as I was hoping for. It didn’t make me any less discouraged, though.

“I just bought this coat, in a once-in-a-lifetime sale.” I explained and held up the front with the stain on it so he can see it clearer. “And chances are, I can’t even get this out properly... Can you please give me something from yours to wear? It’s important and I’m in a hurry.”

Despite our similar height, Jongdae and I aren’t the same size. On the other hand, he tends to dress oversized and while he’s nonchalant about it, he has a good fashion sense, therefore he’s the perfect (and only) candidate to supply me with something passable on such short notice.

My desperation must have showed because Jongdae only cracked one joke before giving me his answer.

“Isn’t coffee in this season?”

“It is, just not drying on a teddy coat.”

The little space with no wall covering reverberated Jongdae’s chuckle greatly. I relished in the sound, and in his next words too.

“You can have my cardigan if you promise you take good care of it.”

He stood up and opened his locker. The piece of clothing coming into view made my heart beat a tad bit faster.

“This is from -”

“Holly Tilfiger, I can tell.” I cut him off unintentionally, already tasting the soft cotton of the clothing between my fingers. I made eye contact with Jongdae to deliver my sincerity. “I promise I take good care of it, thank you.”

He nodded knowingly and held the cardigan out for me to put it on.

It turned out to be even better than I imagined – the fit was amazing; the stripes were uncanny. Sure, it wasn’t what I originally planned but I could already see myself blend well in with the other well-dressed in such a simple, yet cool design.

I faced Jongdae with a wide smile on my face.

“You really saved me.”

“And now you owe me one.” He noted after closing his locker and to my surprise, moved to button up a few buttons for me. “Can’t you put your coat on until you arrive to the venue? It’s cold outside.”

I put a gentle hand on his to stop him from doing more. He’s already done more than enough.

“It’s just a few blocks from here, I’ll be fine. And as for my compensation, I’ll buy you a meal and take over your shift anytime you want. Call?”

“Call.”

“Good. Thanks, Jongdae. See you later!”

“I hope I only see you when you’re buying me that meal. There’s no point of me switching shifts with you if you come in to work anyway.” Jongdae teased and with that, walked to the door which opened to the corridor leading back to the café.

I sent him one last thankful look before rushing out through the backdoor to make it on time.

* * *

Most of the runways of Seoul Fashion Week F/W were held in Dongdaemun Plaza, to a limited but extraordinary audience I was in awe of upon arriving. There were many people I recognized from social media, from TV and more so, from magazines I read.

I wish I did not break my camera a few months before or at least put money away for it to have it repaired because things to capture were many. Too bad, I was keener on other priorities (like buying clothes and cat food). I settled on enjoying the luxurious atmosphere and bittersweetly, the next thing that popped into my mind was, there was a time when I wanted people to come to these shows and see my designs. Well, those times have passed.

I gave my invitation to one of the escorts and following her instructions, went to look for my seat for the first show.

The room was organized to resemble a winter wonderland, with lots of artificial snow, polar bears made out of crystals (Waroski, I’d put good money on it) and the seats all resembled small icebergs but from closer, it was apparent they’re made out plush to sit on comfortably. The music coming from the stereo were smooth jazz covers of Christmas classics.

I looked up “Kim Junmyeon, fashion photographer” from the card he gave me, therefore I know he’s way bigger than he shows; regardless I was floored when I realized I’m seated at the end of the runway, in the second row. Isn’t there were fashion editors and stylists sit? I felt like I need to pinch myself.

Just as my landed on the seat, I spotted a rather familiar face coming my way and I froze on the spot.

“For the fashion Gods, that’s Editor Do.”

It was such an out-of-body experience to see one of my idols walk through the hall like it was his living room, with a poker face he could have won poker championships left and right, I said that sentence above out loud.

Not loud enough for Him to hear, but loud enough for the girl just arriving next to me, to say:

“Indeed, it’s him. Why?”

I snapped my head back at instant. This way, I wasn’t staring at the increasingly approaching powerful man with a look of borderline creepy adoration, but at my new seatmate who turned out to be a sweet-looking girl dressed from head to toe by Mimi Mestmood.

My jaw, which has been barely hanging on, dropped to the floor, literally. Deep down I knew I’m acting ridiculous, but I needed some time until that thought registered.

“Huh”, was the only thing leaving my mouth as response. To say I felt heavily undressed next to a Mestmood masterpiece, is an understatement.

The girl gave a common once-over to the editor of prestigious fashion magazine, Eterno, before shrugging.

“You mentioned the fashion Gods and all, but he doesn’t look so special to me.”

“Excuse me?” I gasped at the audacity as a reflex and forgetting all manners, give the girl a piece of fashion history. “He’s the youngest editor of all time Eterno ever hired. Actually, he didn’t even have to go through the hiring process because the previous editor of Eterno, Lady Kim, bless her; saw one of his junior shows at Parkers and granted him the position right there and then. Mind you, his junior fashion show made headlines in Korea and was appointed as Best Debut Show at Parkers’, even though generally speaking he wasn’t supposed to qualify, because for this award only debut shows by seniors are nominated and he was a junior -”

“I was a sophomore and I didn’t accept the contract for obvious reasons.” A voice cut in before I could have proceeded to list Editor Do’s other ventures. A voice, belonging to none other than Editor Do, himself. “I’d appreciate if you did a fact check before you put my name in your mouth.”

My mind went blank at a glance and only a steady flow of dead air left the mouth I put his name in.

Editor Do gave me one hard look then sit on the seat right in front of me. Previously I would have been flattered, now I just felt humiliated.

I startled when the girl next to me leaned in and whispered in my ear:

“He looks pissed, but he doesn’t care much about you. You’re cool.”

It was her who talked so down to Editor Do yet it was me, who got the rebuke, even if I was just defending his honors. And now she says, just to make me feel worse, that whatever, he doesn’t care anyway? Who is she?!

Flipping my hair above my shoulder, I gifted her with a pointed look... and was suddenly hit with the fact that I know this girl from somewhere. I couldn’t put on a finger on it from where exactly, but I recognized her some way; also, the way she looked back at me was so pure, I felt my frustration melt away like our seats would have, if they were actually made of ice.

“You’re... right.” I cleared my throat and reached out my hand for a handshake. “I’m Hyejoo. Nice to meet you.”

The girl glanced at my hand (hopefully she didn’t linger on my homemade manicure) then on my face.

“Do you know me?”

“You’re familiar but I don’t remember. Sorry?”

“No need to be sorry.” An adorable smile appeared on her delicate face before shaking my hand lightly. “I’m Ria. I like your cardigan.”

Disregarding the irony of being complimented on the one thing not belonging to me, I responded easily.

“Thanks, I like your clothes too. Mimi Mestmood, right?”

“I don’t really know. It was picked out for me.” She said then continued as she noticed the dismay on my face. “I knew it’s a big brand, though. I just love anything with ruffles.”

This girl probably has more money than interest in fashion – it was clear as day. Despite that, I didn’t think she’s being arrogant, rather naïve. Also, not going to lie about it, the more I looked at her the more smitten I was becoming; taking in how adorable she looked and acted, with one hand caressing said ruffles on the bottom part of her dress, legs crossed and swinging back and forth underneath her seat like a child’s.

“Ruffles go well with you.” I found myself saying. “Whoever picked it out for you, they did a good job.”

Our conversation was cut short by the lights slowly going out. The darker the venue became, the more rapidly my excitement rose.

“I can tell it’s your first show. Have fun.” Ria whispered lastly.

The change in music signaled the start of the show. I did my best to ignore Editor Do’s nape being in eye level and looking past it, concentrated on the long runway, waiting for the first model to walk out. I left my phone in my bag, coming to peace with the fact my crappy phone can’t take better pictures than the press’ professional cameras set up everywhere.

It felt so thrilling - the suspense of low music and anticipation-filled air, and the moment the first model appeared in the back. I gulped and let my eyes take in the intricate embroidery on the lapels of the coat the model was wearing, the way the material hugged his body perfectly before it descended and grew in volume to flow after his leisure walk. It was all so tasteful and perfect... and instead of insecurity or hopelessness, I felt empowered. Like the textures were slipping under my fingers so I can map them out and get inspired by them.

It was such a wholesome feeling. I was losing track of time and was practically eating up everything with my eyes like I was never going to be full. And in the middle of it, I almost overlooked what was really in front of me.

Or rather, who.

In fitted, sienna brown pants and a short jacket with a very interesting zipper part, Oh Sehun catwalked towards me relentlessly.

Sehun, my mind echoed in a never-ending ripple. My throat ran dry, but I couldn’t tear my eyes away. For the first time since the show started, I wasn’t in awe of the clothes, but the person who was wearing them.

Sehun, who moved with the elegance of royalty.
Sehun, whose expression stayed firm and chic yet reflected a calm demeanor instead of cold.
Sehun, who at the end of the runway turned his head in my direction causing our eyes met in a short-lived but intense moment.

One look was enough for my heart to skip a beat.

As quick as he came, Sehun returned backstage and the next model took his place. However, I was stuck the moment we looked the same way. I was convinced he didn’t spot me, not in a crowd full of interesting people, not to mention the dark surrounding us; and even if he saw me, I was unsure he recognizes me anymore.

But I saw him, I immediately knew it’s him and instead of the hurt I was supposed to feel based on our parting, I felt a rush of warmth and relief fill my whole being.

I was happy I saw him, even though it was stupid of me.

“Are you okay? You’re red all over.” Ria spoke to me once the lights came back on and the people around us started roaming during the short break before the next show. “You’re not going to cry, are you?”

I ed Jongdae’s cardigan and swiftly laid it in my lap so the gallons of sweat I think I was producing didn’t soak through it. I was holding back tears and truly felt like I was set on fire but that was the last thing I wanted to show.

“I’m okay. I just... Phew, these headlights radiate some heat! What do you say about going out for a breather like everyone else?”

Ria’s eyes lit up hearing my suggestion.

“They’re serving cocktails at the bar.”

“You can drink?” The question stumbled out of me before I could filter. No matter how much thought I gave to Ria’s appearance, she hardly looked twenty to me.

“I turned nineteen this year, for your information. Can you drink?”

I had to let out a scoff at her comeback. Look at this girl! Yet, her manner of speech was more endearing to me than annoying. I grabbed my handbag and linked arms with her.

“I’m four years your senior, for your information.”

“You don’t look like it, so I’ll treat you as a friend!” Ria decided before maneuvering me towards the bar she mentioned. I wasn’t big fan of the idea of drinking this early in the day, nevertheless I saw no harm in getting some low-alcoholic refreshments.

I needed a distraction, too. Looking back at the now empty, lifeless runway from the corner of my eye, I couldn’t stop thinking of seeing Sehun again... even after he broke my heart without knowing.