Cursed

After a long day filled with a whole lot of nothing, which felt pretty odd considering how active they were just a month ago, Eunbi was making her final rounds making sure everyone was ok. Everyone had someone to hug to sleep. Yena with Yuri, Chaeyeon with Sakura, Chaewon with Hitomi, Yujin with Minju, and Wonyoung with Nako, which left her with Hyewon.

After checking with everyone to make sure they were asleep, Eunbi made her way to the living room. She sat there, reminiscing the times when everyone loved them.

She remembered getting pranked while being voted as leader. She remembered her first brithday vlive where Sakura said "unnie jinjja nice body". She remembered Hyewon's iconic "turn on the two gas pumps and the main breaker to restart the generator". She remebered going bowling with Yena being the queen of bluffing. She remembered all of Chaeyeon's jaw-dropping dance covers. She remembered Chaewon's surprise collab during MAMA 2018 with Moonbyul. She remembered Minju's "청소 좀 하지". She remembered all of Nako's "Nico Nico Nii" displays. She remembered Hitomi flipping her way into everyone's hearts (even her own). She remembered Yuri's soothing vocals like in the vocal line Vlive. She remembered Yujin being the most charismatic MC ever. She remembered every greeting they made where Wonyoung said "The moment we become one, everyone focus".

All those memories were like a dream. And all of a sudden one man turned their whole careers upside down. All of a sudden those dreamlike moments became moments that don't look like they'll happen ever again. Those happy moments became sad memories. Those happy times became-

"Eunbi-unnie? Eunbi-unnie?? Hello???"

She came back to reality to find a very clingy, food-loving girl waving her hand in front of her face.

"Oh, sorry Hyewonnie. How long have you been there?"

"10 minutes"

"What???"

"You were deep in thought, weren't you? What were you thinking about?"

"Us. Us when we could see wizones happily. Us when we didn't have to worry having to leave each other before 2021. Us before we had to worry about the hate we'd get for making a public appearance. Us when we were happier together."

"You've really had it tough, haven't you unnie? Now's probably a better time than ever to let it all out. I'm here. I'll listen."

As Eunbi felt the dam of emotions inside of her breaking she burst:

"I'M CURSED. IT'S ALMOST AS IF LIFE IS TELLING ME I'M NOT SUPPOSED TO BE AN IDOL. FIRST WITH YE-A AND NOW WITH IZ*ONE. THE ONLY DIFFERENCE IS THAT I WAS THE 2ND YOUNGEST IN YE-A BUT I'M THE OLDEST HERE. I HAVE TO BE STRONG FOR YOU GUYS. IF I SHOW THAT I'M WEAK, HOW WILL YOU GUYS BE??? I DON'T KNOW HOW MUCH MORE OF THIS I CAN TAKE. I REGRET EVERYTHING I JUST CAN'T"

And with that, she devolved into a sobbing mess in Hyewon's embrace. Hyewon rubbed her unnie's back and as the sobbing died down, she took Eunbi by the shoulders, looked at how sad she was and said: "It's ok to not be ok unnie. We all know this must be hard for you unnie. I'll be honest it broke my heart seeing you acting strong, when in reality, this is hurting you more than any of us. It's ok to cry in front of us unnie."

They heard the bedroom door open, and out came 2 girls, a radish and a peach. Seeing the state of the oldest, they rushed over and engulfed the older 2 in a hug. Eunbi, feeling the warm presence of the 2 girls surrounding them, felt her heart get even heavier. All this time, every moment she spent, she was trying to put up an act that she was truly strong while all these problems were happening. But at the end of the day she was just weak. And the 11 girls had to deal with her. She felt like such a bother, having to be cared for by these younger girls. What's the point of being the leader? You should be strong no matter what.

"You're only human unnie. You're not even that much older than us. Yes, we call you old, but it's all in good fun. Please don't feel like you have to hide anything from us unnie."

"Chaewon-unnie's right. As much as we depend on you, please depend on us too. As bad as you're feeling right now, all 12 of us are here because of you. Being a leader doesn't mean you need to be strong while the rest of us are weak. Our journey isn't judged on how we fall, but on how we get back up and keep moving. Trying to force yourself will do no good unnie. Don't force yourself to put up a smile. This is a rough time for all of us, but I know you must be hurting the most, seeing all of us like this."

While Hitomi was saying all of this, Chaewon pulled something out of her pocket. Placing it in her labelmate unnie's hand, she said:

"Hitomi and I thought that you need this more than we do. I hope you keep it, and have fond memories when you look at it unnie."

Eunbi, looking at the object in her hand, was shocked. It was a lock. Not just any lock. It looked exactly like one of the locks the 2 girls made during their Namsan Tower date Vlive. On one side it said "IZ*ONE" and on the other it said "영원하자" with a little "쌈빵♡" in the bottom corner.

"Wasn't this stolen?"

"It was. But we asked manager-unnie to get us one that looked just like it. Chaewon-unnie and I thought it'd be cool if we had it for memory's sake. But I think you need it more than we do. No matter where our future takes us, the 12 of us will always be IZ*ONE."

"Unnie, what's 12-1?"

"11?"

"No, 12-1=0 unnie."

"Well actually-"

"Hyewon- unnie, we know you love math, but it's really not the point."

"ANYWAY, IZ*ONE isn't IZ*ONE without any of us, so we hope that you remember that and smile when you remember us in the future unnie."

"As if I'll forget Chaewon though, we're from the same label!"

"Unfortunately"

"야!!!"

The 4 girls chuckled for a bit and the younger pair went back to sleep.

"Unnie, I don't want you to think of this as failure. This is just a lesson for you to learn from. So take it and run with it. And I want our memories of us to bring smiles, not frowns. Now come on, let's go to bed. Tomorrow's a new day unnie"

As the 2 made their way to their bedroom, Hyewon turned around to face Eunbi, looked her straight in the eyes for a solid second, smiled, and gave her a peck on the lips.

"I didn't really mean 'us' as in all 12 haha"

"H-hey! T-that's not fair!"

Grabbing her by the wrist, Hyewon pulled Eunbi into bed where they cuddled each other to sleep.