"Jisoo, when we're still single when we hit 30, let's marry each other instead"








 

Jennie had woken up to the coldness of her bed, dream slowly blending in with the reality of her just grumbling like a cat as her girlfriend would often compare her with. Though her dream seem to be more of a déjà vu, the absence of her brunette kept her out from remembering the dream.

It wasn't unusual for her to wake up with Jisoo already gone. The girl had just finished her residency and is now officially an attending, a fellow under Kim Junmyeon. Though, it never sat well for Jennie knowing her girl is under him. Not with the history they've gone through and fights they had with each other just because of that guy. Jisoo didn't have a choice, however. Jisoo wanted to learn from the best, and she promised her she's keeping things professional with him.

And Jennie trusts her.

With her mind, body and soul.

 

Her heart.

 

Heck Jisoo could tell her a hundred things and Jennie would believe her in an instant, even if all of them's a lie.

 

The years Jisoo spent on residency wasn't an easy road to trek. Even before Jisoo entered residency, they had to compromise a lot if it meant staying together. Jennie being a freelance model and music producer, with Jisoo being a resident, things were bound to fall out.

Their schedules barely match. Jisoo arriving home as Jennie had just left or Jennie arriving home as Jisoo was just about to leave. And oh no, let's not get started with that goddamn pager. It felt like it only goes off when they finally get to have a romantic dinner after 8 months.

It's not because the patients always eat Jisoo's time that wrecked havoc in their relationship. It's the fact that Jisoo's working under Junmyeon, the one guy that always gets under her skin. She was convinced the guy wanted to mess their time together on so many occasions.

Though, their arguments always fall under the same topic. It's always about Junmyeon. Or, that's what Jennie thinks. Because Jisoo would always counter her about that photographer or that other model, to which Jennie can't see a reason for her to be mad about. How can she look at someone else when Jisoo's literally the face that launched a thousand ships.

She thinks Jisoo was being petty, and Junmyeon is a different case. Because they had a history, far deep in the books of never-to-be-remembered-again, so she thinks it was only imperative for her to have doubts.

But all those arguments are worth it. The tears, the broken vase, the hole in the wall, the days they woke up with swollen faces. They were all worth it. At least Jennie's sure it was worth it. But she trusts Jisoo when she says "You're worth it"

And they're all in the past now. They're on their 9th year, pushing 10th this coming August. They've always known they would come this far. It was just a matter of making it happen.

Staying.




 

Jennie reached out for her phone, immediately greeted by a notification coming from Jisoo.

 

Jisoo: Hey, I need to tell you something important. Let's have dinner at Jungsik Dang. I'll be there by 7pm. I'm already at work

 

The text seemed odd to Jennie. The older would usually greet her good morning, with a bunch of hearts and kissing emojis. She wondered how important this talk is, especially on her birthday

 

Jennie received tons of Birthday greetings, and she thanked them all. Though, it sank her heart a little that none of them were from Jisoo.

 

Has she forgotten? For 20 years of knowing each other, Jisoo had greeted her happy birthday first thing in the morning for 19 times. Be it Jisoo still at the hospital or Jisoo being in the middle of surgery (which is very impractical i must say). She'd always find a way to greet the younger. Did something happen? Though, the dinner seems to be a celebration for it. But Jisoo's cryptic text had her doubting if she even remembered.

Lisa had always scolded her of incessantly overthinking many situations. But she can't help it. Overthinking often lead her to being right, sixty percent of the time. It was part of her nature to think things through, and the slight change was giving her cold feet.

 

This time, Jennie doesn't want to overthink.

 

It's her birthday, and she has to enjoy it no matter what. So she threw all her negative thoughts out the window, gliding her thumb on her favorite thing to wear.

 

Their Promise Ring.

 

It was a ring they've gotten when they were still friends. Jennie vaguely remembered crying over a guy one night, until Jisoo came through knocking the door of her bedroom with a pair of rings. They both made promises to each other, Jennie promising she'd be there for Jisoo her whole life. And it's a promise she's most certainly keeping.

 

Now that she thought about it, did Jisoo ever tell her what her promise was?

 

Jennie scoffed to herself. They've had this ring for 14 years and she's only realizing that now?

Curiosity was killing her. 


 

Curiosity for tonight,

 

and curiosity for Jisoo's promise.











 

As soon as Jennie finished the photo shoot around 5 pm, she immediately drove home to prepare her dress. Of course, Jisoo wouldn't be home. She clearly stated they will meet at Jungsik Dang. It doesn't take a genius to know Jisoo won't go home first.

Jennie opted to choose a dress in a shade of seductive red. She has never worn them, as she bought it recently, but she thinks today is the perfect time. She doesn't know why, but there's an unsettling feeling that resides in her heart. And with whatever talk Jisoo have with her, worse come to worst, seduction is her last card.

Though she knows for herself that she sounds apprehensive, something Lisa had been pointing her out the whole day. But Jisoo hadn't sent her a single text today. Not a greeting, not a breath, not a letter. The last message was about this important matter.

It's an understatement to say it was getting on Jennie's head. It's literally killing her. And all she could think about was the possibility that Jisoo might have fallen for Junmyeon all over again, or somebody else. Fallen so deep that she forgot Jennie's birthday and accidentally decided to break up with her today

Gosh, just the thought of it is making her cry. The thought of Jisoo laying her head on somebody else's shoulder. The thought of Jisoo warming up another bed. The thought of Jisoo secretly making out with someone at the secluded part of the hospital. The thought of Jisoo making love with someone else.

 

Jennie can't even remember the last time they had .

 

It was a long time ago. Was that the problem? They used to be so... active, that they barely crammed college.  Jennie scattered her brain for the things Jisoo love Jennie doing the most.  Places to touch, to kiss, to . But her thoughts...

Thinking about doing it with Jisoo for the sake of proving herself still worthy of her was  destroying her, so much that she can't even imagine how she'll seduce the older tonight













 

But then again, Jisoo did tell her "I love you" last night.

 

And she trusts her it holds the same meaning as she said it to her the first time.




 

Jennie was already at the restaurant 15 minutes earlier than what Jisoo told her. It was a VIP table, and it made Jennie wonder how important of a talk it is to keep it very private and secluded.

For some reason, Jennie can't think of anything positive to come out of this night. She had always been the type to over analyze the slightest changes, especially Jisoo.

Because she's confident she knows 99% about her.

And being treated differently makes her feel like she never knew her at all.

 

Finally, Jisoo has arrived in a clad of black dress. She looked ethereal, imperfections matching her other imperfections, creating an almost perfect human being named Kim Jisoo.

It was normal for Jennie to fall in love all over again.

"Good Evening Babe" Jisoo smiled at her. At some point, her anxiety was expelled, replaced with nothing but warmth

But then she remembered The Talk™. Her anxiety striking through the roof. She takes a deep breath before bringing it up to Jisoo

"Good Evening. So... What did you wanted to talk about" Jennie asked, trying not to sound like she's nervous as she already is

"I'll... tell you later" Jennie noticed the way Jisoo acted a bit crest fallen. "Let's eat first"

 

The speed Jennie ate her dinner was the fastest she ever did. She wanted to hear it so bad as her nerves were getting to her. She stares at Jisoo, watching her finish the last slice of meat on her plate. Jennie then realized, she haven't greeted her happy birthday

Jennie unconsciously takes another deep breath, to which Jisoo's slowly noticing. Though, she can tell Jisoo's just as nervous as she was, for whatever reason.

Jisoo put her utensils down, picking up her wine glass and closed it to her lips, taking a seemingly nervous gulp.

"How was your day?" Jisoo asked, maybe trying to make the conversation light

But Jennie wasn't having it. She wants to end this feeling of anxiety and just get things over with. She wants to welcome a new feeling, instead of the stress that Jisoo put on her, especially on her ing birthday

"Just get it over with, Jisoo" Jennie knows the piercing gaze she sent towards Jisoo made her flinch, not getting unnoticed with the way the older hit the table. Although it would be a funny scene on other days, it only added up to Jennie's worries

 

"You're angry" Jisoo tried to laugh it off, failing miserably with the awkward atmosphere "Well, who wouldn't, after not greeting you the whole day" Jisoo still tried to smile, but Jennie's brows were only inching closer together, jaws tight

 

Jisoo took a very deep, shaky breath, like she's about to say the most important thing that could either cause the apocalypse or the genesis. Jennie prays it's the latter "I- I don't know how to say this but please listen to me" Jisoo takes Jennie's hand that lies limply on the table. She had been unconsciously clenching on it, and although she's undeniably mad at Jisoo for making her feel such a terrible way, her grip loosens, trying to increase the surface area on which Jisoo could touch.

 

A gulp proceeds on Jisoo's throat, and Jennie's mind slowly blanked out from generating thoughts. The older's next words, putting complete silence and hurt as if she was walking around with a knife stabbed to her heart.



















 

"I'm breaking up with you"

 

Jennie's first tear fell, and then another. She had expected this, with the way Jisoo acted so differently today. The way she felt like she never knew her at all.

 

The worst feeling ever.

 

And here she was thinking they've been okay last week, or the week before that, or the months before that but...

It doesn't change the fact that she hadn't noticed earlier. Where was the sign? It felt like the past years they were together was so surreal. Like they were living in the garden of Eden with a limited comfort they could get. Everyday felt like Jisoo loved her as much as the Jisoo who fell in love with her for the first time.

 

No. She does love her, those times Jisoo told her "I love you". Because she trusts Jisoo with her every word. She just doesn't trust herself worthy of that love. And so here she is, getting a check from overthinking.

 

Jennie tried to pull her hand away from Jisoo's, yanking it as hard as she could even though her brain had already drained all the energy from her. But the older was stronger, as if she wants to put a deeper stab on Jennie

 

"Jennie please, don't go. Listen to me, baby..." The endearment somehow made Jennie's breath hitch. Hell, her breath hitches every time Jisoo calls her, regardless of the endearment she uses. Jennie was relentless however. She just wanted to get out of there. Go to the Han River and shout how stupid she is for not noticing her girlfriend slipping away. With her current look though, she's grateful that Jisoo chose a private room to tell her all this. In the end, even when breaking up, Jisoo was still considerate of her

Jennie felt the older stand up from her seat, not letting go of her hand. She continues struggling out of her hold, yet finding herself between her arms further putting her in a tighter hold with Jisoo" I'm sorry Jennie. Please... I know many things are going on inside your head but I just want you to listen to me right now baby" There she is again, calling her with that damn endearment. At the back of Jennie's mind she was hoping it was just a joke. But this isn't Jisoo's humor.

She lightly punched Jisoo, trying to keep her away. Maybe trying to hurt her too for the pain she caused her but she couldn't even will herself to do it.

Eventually, Jennie gave up struggling. It was futile. The older was simply stronger than her, and her resolve was sturdier. As soon as she calmed down, Jisoo cupped her cheeks, looking down on her as Jennie looked up to her.

Jennie doesn't want to believe it, she doesn't want to trust it, but the way Jisoo looked into her eyes, as if she's ready to dive into her soul and explore the most vulnerable parts she's very much familiar with, it wasn't the first time Jisoo did it. But it was the first time she ever felt pain through it "I'm a total for doing this but I intend to keep my promise" Jisoo said, followed by another gulp

At this point, Jennie can no longer understand her intentions. What exactly does the older want, now that they've broken up? And promise? Did she promise her new lover to tell Jennie this? Whatever this is? Before she could think deeply about it, she heard the older mutter something silently, but loud enough for her to hear " I'm so nervous" It also made Jennie nervous.

She watched Jisoo take a deep breath, then slowly leaned in. Jennie wasn't expecting a kiss, as she should be, but she felt the older lay her forehead on her own, trying to hold their gazes as close as she could













 

"Because baby now that we're both single, will you marry me?" 

 

As soon as it left Jisoo's mouth, Jennie broke down. She held on Jisoo's arms tightly, trying to revert her intention to bawl to squeezing her hand on something squishy. Though, she wanted to keep it minimal, she can tell Jisoo's internally squirming in pain, but it was a well deserved pain for the she made the girl go through. The way Jisoo didn't show a single sign of pain and letting herself be Jennie's stressball with a smile however, made Jennie feel like her love is as present as their existence.

"Hey shh... Aww baby I'm really sorry I had to do that" Jisoo knows she had gone too far. Well, not that she ever doubted her love for the younger. She just thinks it was imperative of her to keep her side of the promise as Jennie does with her own. "You know I don't like sticking with the norm..."

Jennie lightly pushed Jisoo, trying to face her completely and make the older listen to her. "I ing hate you so much Kim Jisoo" with the sore voice and numb face, it looked like Jennie had been crying all day. Then again, maybe she had been
 

Jisoo leaned down, kissing Jennie's forehead before wrapping her back into her arms. "Do you remember when I gave you our first Promise rings?" She felt Jennie lightly shake her head, so she continued "I was gonna promise that I'll be by your side forever. But you beat me to it, and I trust that you would keep your end of the bargain so I didn't see any reason to have the same promise as yours. I wanted to make my own promise to satisfy my Jennie-love-sick-seventeen-year-old-" Jisoo felt the younger lightly grip on her dress.

"You're thirty now..." Jisoo continues "I hope you remembered that one moment where you said you'd marry me if we're both single when we turn 30, because that moment was my anchor Jennie. It may seem petty. But it was my anchor. It was my last hope. To hell if you don't like me back. I know you'll let me keep my side of the promise. And never in my life did I ever went through hell and back just to keep someone single instead of actually pursuing them" Jisoo pulled away from hugging the girl to look at her in the eye "Until you"

For a second, Jennie opened to say something, but it got stuck in . With all honesty, she just doesn't know what to say, but she still found something "So that's why no one else dated me in college..." Jennie looked at her, a look with a hint of accusation "other than you" it elicited a nervous laugh from Jisoo

"Well, we did work out together so well during college right?" Jisoo said with a smile, slowly faltering to a guilty frown to every beat of her heart "Please forgive me..." Jisoo begs

Jennie looked at her skeptically "I just said it. I ing hate you..." She said with a somewhat child like voice, and then she stood up to hug her close, wrapping her arms around Jisoo "and love you at the same time"

Jisoo wraps her arms around the younger trying to pull her closer is if she doesn't want her to disappear from her grasps "What would it take for you to not hate me anymore?"

Jisoo had an instinct that Jennie had just scrunched her nose. It was a noticeable habit she does when she contemplates

"Maybe start by putting that ring on my finger and greeting me Happy Birthday"