‘Dear Yifan,’ I started off, sitting on my rooftop that overlooked the entirety of Seoul. It was just past midnight, November 6th, 2019. It was a day I could never forget. One I would forever remember, even after oh so many years. Perhaps remembering today is what caused me to climb onto the rooftop of my apartment complex out of pure loneliness. But this was the perfect scenery to pull out my pen and paper and write a letter, just as I had done previous years. There was an empty bottle of Merlot keeping me company. I could've been drunker, but I wanted my handwriting to be legible. It's an important day. It's his birthday. 

‘Today is your birthday! Happy birthday! I can’t believe you’re 29 already! Just wait up, it's almost my turn.’

Meeting Yifan was fun. We met in college while I was studying law and he was studying business. I started working for one of the best law firms and he worked his way up to become a director of his father's company. It was a running joke that he was only a few months older than me, yet our height difference was that large. He stood tall at 6'2 while I was and still am 5’7. He was different from me. Yifan had moved from Guangzhou, China, all the way to Seoul to attend university. I don't even know how we managed to cross paths, but we did. Maybe it was because of mutual friendships we had, maybe it was fate. Yifan would laugh at me if he knew I called it fate, he didn't believe in those things. Neither did I, but meeting Yifan was something that felt destined to happen. 

‘Remember when we almost burned down your apartment on your 21st birthday? I told Jongin not to light the cake that close to your curtains, but he was off his s drunk.’

Right before my finals, I had to move in with Yifan. The rent for my home had shot up suddenly and I couldn’t pay it on time every month and got kicked out. I packed up my stuff in the pouring rain and knocked on the first door that came to mind. Surprisingly, Yifan's. Though I have to be honest that his apartment was less than a block away, I secretly felt happy that I had a reason to see him. We weren’t that close yet back then, but I was desperate. My finals would start the next day and I had no place to stay.

"Junmyeon?" he said when he opened the door, eyeing me up and down. Normally I would've considered it to be rude but I was soaking wet from the rain. Also, I had cried my eyes out because of the stress. "I'm really sorry to have to ask this, but can I stay with you for tonight? I just got evicted and my finals are tomorrow and I'm really, really, desperate," I begged. Yifan stepped aside from his door and practically pulled me inside. "Kind of odd that you had to ask, of course you can stay. Stay as long as you need," he said.

Turns out rent was expensive all over the place, and I ended up staying longer than intended. He didn't mind at all and it actually caused us to become best friends. I paid my share (on time) and we continued to live together.

Living with Yifan was fun. From the nights where we’d stay up and play games to the nights where we’d enjoy each other's presence while studying our asses off.

‘And that time on my 21st birthday where we sat on the skating rink while the rest were buying booze and you told me about your feelings. I remember that the moment we kissed, Chanyeol and Baekhyun had to walk out of the store and immediately shouted ‘SHIP! SHIP! SHIP!’

It was really late, probably like 3 A.M., and we had left the bar and made our way to a skating park. Our friends went to buy liquor from the store because obviously you can never drink enough when you’re 21, and Yifan and I were sitting alone. I couldn’t be bothered to walk 50 metres to the store and Yifan didn’t want to leave me alone. It was cold and dark outside. The only light source were the streetlights and the stars. A cold gust of wind blew over us and I shivered from the cold. "Here," Yifan said and draped his leather jacket over my shoulders and wrapped his arm around them so I couldn't take it off. I relaxed my shoulders and slightly leaned against him. 

“It’s a starry night,” he said and pointed to the sky. I looked up and struggled to keep my eyes open. I was drunk, cold and tired, but being with Yifan felt nice and comfortable that I wanted to stay awake as long as possible. “It’s really pretty,” I slurred followed with a stupid giggle. “Just like you are,” Yifan said and looked at me in my eyes. I was hammered, but that moment made me feel like