Ugh! February 14th. The day I'm the least looking forward to every year. I don't get why there's such a ridiculous occasion. I mean, Valentine's Day shouldn't be the only special day for couples to send each other gifts or prepare romantic surprises for each other. I think it's the day for couples to show off to the world that they're taken. Unfortunately, this is a dreadful day for singles, including me. Every time I pass by couples smiling at each other's gaze and holding each other's hands, I feel a mix of jealousy and loneliness. Among my group of friends, I'm the only one who doesn't have a boyfriend. And throughout my 30 years of living on this earth, not a single guy has asked me out. Ever. I've had crushes on four or five guys in my teen and college years, but to my disappointment, it seemed that none of them notice me. Another thing I don't get it I'm always the third wheel among my friends. A few days before Valentine's Day, I would get two or three calls from my friends to ask me to tag along with them on their Valentine's Day dates. Why would they want me to follow them on their lovey-dovey plans? They would beg me for advice when they started an argument in the middle of their date. I have not been in a relationship before, so I'm definitely not the best counselor for relationships. I held the urge to gag and vomit when they steal long lip locks right in front of me. Why me? 

           The only person I can spill all of my single-as-a-pringle complaints and thoughts is my best friend, Lee Hyukjae. He doesn't really hang out with any of my close friends, because he's usually busy with his two full-time jobs as a dance teacher and cashier at a grocery store. I meet up with him in person once or twice every month, but we manage to check on with each other through texts, comments on our social media posts, and video calls. We may not hang out as much as back when we were college students, but we know each other so well that we can read each other's minds. We are so familiar with each other's strengths, flaws, interests, pet peeves, and dreams. Both of us are single. Hyukjae has experienced a couple of failed relationships, as he got cheated twice. He's an easy target because he's a big softie and he puts too much trust in his ex-girlfriends. I've warned him that relationships with someone he just met may be a downfall, but he's adamant that he wants to commit to his partner, and that will make his partner be committed to him in return. But when he found out that his exes have backup dates behind his back, he came to realize that being in a serious relationship is a lot harder than he thought. He wished he could love someone who knows and loves him for who he is. He wished that he could love someone who understands him wholly as a person, and not just a mere subject for temporary attraction. He's told me these wishes a few times, and I've been holding his words on to myself for a while now. He took these right out of my mouth because I wish for these exact same things in my ideal lover. 

               February 14th, 2019 came. I sighed as I looked unenthusiastically at my wall calendar. Can't this day just be gone in a flash? Unlike other Valentine Days when I'm booked for my zero-paid job as a third wheel, my plan for today was to meet up with my best friend for a movie. Just as friends. I know it may be awkward for two friends to sit on a love seat in a theatre, but that's literally the cheapest seat we can get. I don't know if I'll get an "emergency call" from one of my friends for a last minute third wheel appointment or a quick advice request today, but all I tell myself is today's Hyukjae's and my Friendatine. 

         It was 10 am when I arrived at the park which was a 5-minute walk from my apartment. While waiting for Hyukjae, I tore my bag of Honey Butter Chips open and munched the sweet and salty goodness. It was no surprise that the park was already alive with couples strolling past. Despite the chilly winter, the sun was peeking out between the light grey clouds. I checked the weather forecast on my phone; it showed an 80% chance of snowing tonight. If it's possible, I would have Hyukjae to drop me off home just before night fell. I don't want to get sick in the snow, because I think I've picked the worst outfit of the day. What was I thinking? I was wearing this white long-sleeved dress with a skirt that doesn't even reach close to my knees followed by a cream woolen jacket. I even paired my clothes with a pair of white Toms, which doubled up the coldness my body failed to resist. Even the heat packs I'd attached beneath my dress didn't warm me up entirely. Hyukjae would definitely complain about me not wearing something thick to cover up my body, especially my pale shivering legs. But oh well....I'm dressing up for our Friendatine, so he should acknowledge my effort of showing off my feminine side once in a while. 

        "Hey! Sorry, I'm late!" a familiar voice said. 

        "Humph! Care to explain why you're 3 minutes and 40 seconds late?" I raised my eyebrow. 

        "Do you have to sound like a principal?" he chuckled. 

         "You know that I get bored easily." I teased as I stuck out my tongue.

         "I know I should have texted you," he said as he sat beside me, "I was stuck in traffic near Gangnam." 

         "Fair enough," I replied.

         "What you got there? Ooooh! Honey butter chips! Give me some!" he peered.

         "No! Get your own!" I whined. I hid my bag of chips away from his sight. His hand slapped my back as I dragged it back to my lap. Little did I knew, his outstretched hand reached to the opening. I gave up, watching him digging his fingers into the plastic. 

         "You're eating alone, so I'm pitying you." he reasoned as he shoved the chips into his mouth. I rolled my eyes and stared ahead. "I don't get why you're always eating alone, especially back in college.  See? This is why you don't have a boyfriend. You're always sidelining yourself." 

         "Well, what about you? You eat alone as well." I said. 

         "That's a phase in my post-breakup recovery." he winked as he slapped my back one more time, "But seriously, you really need to meet some guys!" 

         "Do it well yourself!" I scoffed. I puffed my cheeks in annoyance as I continued to pop some more chips into my mouth. 

         "Anyways," he changed the subject as he stretched his arms, "What do you wanna do for Friendatine today?" 

         "How about a movie?" I suggested. 

          "A movie eh? Which one?" he hit my back once more. How much more does he wanna hit my back? Is this a new friend gesture he's come up with? 

         "I have no idea actually." I answered, "Maybe we can choose one when we arrive at the theatre." 

         "Sure! Why not?" he nodded. 

         "Maybe you can help to buy popcorn this time." I chipped in. 

         "Me? Why?" he raised his eyebrow. 

         "Hey! I'm always the one who buys popcorn! You should do it sometime too!" 

         "Well, I think the person who always buys popcorn should do the job. So you're in charge of popcorn. I'll buy our tickets, deal?" There he is again! Hitting my back! It's not rough though.         

          "I guess that's fair." I gave in. I was about to reach my hand over my back when suddenly Hyukjae caught my wrist. "What?" 

          "Aigoo! Why is your hand so cold?" he exclaimed. He fished out his coat pocket for a heat pack and pressed it onto my hand. I stared at him, stunned at the way he acted today. I couldn't remember the last time he was this caring and lovey-dovey. Was he trying to tell me something? 

           "I...I'm okay, thanks." I stuttered. 

           He smiled and got up. "Anyways, I'm heading to the washroom. I'll be right back, okay?" I glanced at him taking a few steps forward, then turning around the bench. His eyes wandered while murmuring, "Hmm...it's been a while since I've come to this area. I can't remember where the washroom is." Little did I knew, he was behind me and asked, "Hey! The washroom's further down, right?"

          "Yeah! Right there!" I answered as I pointed straight. 

          "You mean over there?" 

          "Right there!" 

          "You sure that the washroom is over there?" 

            "I'm 100% sure! It's just straight ahead!" I groaned. He hit my back a few more times. What in the freaking world is he doing? 

             I swore I hear him chuckling. "Okay okay! Got it! Don't move okay? I'll be right back in just a bit!" He scurried his way to the bathroom with his hands tucked in his coat pockets. I wondered how did he ever hold his pee for the past ten or so minutes when he kept on pestering me by slapping me on my back several times. Wait...wait a minute. Did he slap my back as a funny gesture or...something else? I reached my hand over the lower of my back and felt something like paper sticking on the back of my outerwear. I took my jacket off and flipped it over. Five colorful Post-Its with lines such as "This girl is mine", "Don't touch her! She's Hyukjae's!", and "The owner will be back in 5 minutes!" were stuck on my jacket. My heart went warm and fuzzy. I've never felt this feeling in ages, and I smiled without even realizing that I was smoothing the mini square papers with my cold fingers. And then it dawned on me. The reason why he acted weird today was that he wanted to confess his feelings to me. Does he like me? For how long? How come I don't notice any signs of him liking me? For the past ten years, I only see him as a best friend. Someone who I can lean onto when I feel down or when I need help. But one thing I've been hiding away from him is my unexpected crush on him. It happened five months after his break up. I invited him as a guest for a company dinner, and he looked stunning in his new formal suit. I don't know whether he noticed me blushing, but I fell for him ever since then. 

            He came back five minutes later just as he promised from his sneaky confession. I took a glance at him, and I could hear my heart drumming in my ears. He looked down with his cheeks flushed as he walked towards me. His bangs nestled over his dark brown eyes. He looked exclusively handsome in his grey sweater followed by his light brown pea coat, his pair of semi-blue ripped jeans, and his pair of ankle-high sneakers. He sat one meter away from me as I quickly looked back at the cheesy notes. 

             "What is this?" I asked. 

            "Are you nervous?" he blurted. His dimples peeked out from his cheeks as he smiled shyly. His remark got me blushing. I've never thought that I feel such a way at this moment! He noticed my reaction and added, "I'm nervous too," He rocked his body back and forth slowly to wind down his nervousness. 

             "Hyukjae...I..." I stuttered. 

              "I know it's weird," he said, "but I've liked you for a few months now, and I've been thinking about how and when I want to tell you how I feel ever since. I know that you may think that confessing my feelings to you on Valentine's Day is lame. I've always wanted to say it to you when we meet up because I want to be sincere when I say it myself instead of texting." I looked at him with my jaw dropped. It surprised me to see him moving so quickly after his last breakup which was two years ago. How on earth did he develop feelings for me? In what way did he find me attractive? If I confess my feelings to him earlier, would I be brave enough to go beyond our friendship? These questions swirled in my head until Hyukjae waved his hand over my eyes. "Hello? Earth to ______?" 

               "Huh?" I blinked. 

               "Are you okay? Did I say something?" 

              "No! It's nothing!" I shook my head. 

               "It's ok if you don't have feelings for me. It's just that this time, I want you to be my Valentine." 

               "Hyukjae," I took a deep breath, "the truth is...I like you too." 

               His eyes widened. "Really?" 

               I nodded shyly. "I've liked you for a little while too." And before I knew it, I felt him slipping his slender fingers into mine. Welp! There go my cheeks!

          While we were on the way to the movies which was a few blocks away from the park, Eunhyuk held my hand the whole time. A tiny white puff tickled my nose, and I looked up to see fresh snow falling from dark cumulonimbus that clumped in the sky. No wonder the temperature seemed to drop more than before.

           "Hyukjae?" I cleared my throat as I spoke. 

           "Hmm?" 

           "How do you realize that you like me?" 

           He thought for a moment. "I think the first moment I've had a crush on you was back at the company dinner. You look gorgeous in anything you wear, but that sapphire blue dress you wore that night took my breath away. I literally couldn't think straight, because I was starstruck by you." 

           I looked at him in awe. Are there any other romantic stories about a couple falling for each other at the same time and place? "No way! The time when I'm first attracted to you was when I saw you in your tux for the company dinner!" 

           "Well, what a coincidence!" he laughed. A warm piece of clothing was draped over my back, and I turned to see Hyukjae putting his coat over me. "You're probably gonna yell at me, but you look like you came out from the closet of poor fashion choices."

           I narrowed my eyes and elbowed his ribs lightly. "Hey! At least I'm all dressed up!" 

           "On a snowy day like this?" he smirked, "Are you dressing up so nice just to snatch my heart away?" 

           "Well looks who's talking!" I pinpointed, "You prepared all of the Post-It notes just to cover up your cowardice for saying your feelings by mouth." 

           "Hey! It's a surprise, and it worked! That's the most creative, romantic gesture I've come up with!" 

           "Well, at least you did show how you feel in person." I agreed, "It's cheesy, but I like it." 

           "And what you're wearing right now is one of my new favorite looks on you. Even though you look like you barely survive in this temperature." he grinned. 

           "Hey! One more time you malign about my outfit, and I will take a cab home!" I pouted.

           "I'm just pulling your leg." he chuckled and held my hand. His thumb circled over the back of my palm, and my heart felt like it was about to explode. 

           When we arrived at the entrance of the brick-wall cinema, the glass doors were closed and not a person was in sight. "Oh darn!" I gasped. 

          "What?" 

          "The cinema! It's closed!" I groaned, "I forgot that this cinema closes every Tuesday. Gosh dammit, I should have done a rain check yesterday!" 

          I spotted him glaring at me in amusement. He then burst on laughing which made me forget my stupidity. "Oh ______, I love that you never change! You're always forgetful!" 

         I squinted at him. "No, I'm not!" 

        "Oh yeah? Remember when we were in the second year of college? You forgot to pack your lunch, and you left your wallet back home. So I had to share my lunch with you, and you decided to let me buy you some cinnamon muffins from the cafeteria." 

        "I had my first hangover the night before, and that was why I forgot to do so the next day," I recalled. 

        "And when we were attending our graduation ceremony, you forgot to bring the stack of manga you borrowed from the president of the Manga Club?" he snickered. 

        "Oh gosh!" I laughed, "He was fuming! I had to drive forty minutes all the way back home just to get those books back. He didn't say thank you, but meh at least I've returned them." 

         "You got lucky! Otherwise, you would end your graduation day with a twisted neck and a karate-chopped arm." he hooted. 

         "Couldn't agree more! I nearly forgot that he has a black belt." 

            Just then, my phone buzzed. I mentally facepalmed when I saw the caller ID. Heck no she would call me today..."Heyyyyy girl! I need you to do me a huge favor!" Raye chirped in the line. 

            "Let me guess," I faked a smile, "you want me to go with you and your boyfriend today?" 

            "Bingo! You know that both my bae and I can't drive, so I hope you can be our chauffeur for the day! And also, both of us won't get our next paychecks until next week, so we don't have any money saved up for the fancy dinner we've reserved at that new French restaurant. So! We will need you to pay for our meals." 

             I couldn't really process all the details, because I'm so looking forward to the rest of my Valentine's day with Hyukjae. And now this happened... Sometimes I don't even get on why my friends like to use me as their "servant" in their dates. I don't even know if I should even call them my friends. All this time, I keep on giving and helping them just to please them, but I didn't receive anything back. Whenever I ask for help, they would back out with the most ridiculous excuses such as "Oh! I'm saving up my last bit of money for my trip in five years" or "Why should I even help you? You live close by the campus right?". They refuse to pay me back after all I've done for them. And I hate myself for being too nice. And too committed to other people's wants. I was about to say yes when suddenly Hyukjae yanked my phone from my hand. "Hyukjae?" I exclaimed. 

               He put one finger on his lips, telling me to be quiet. He held up my phone and said, "Hi! This is Hyukjae, _______'s best friend AND boyfriend. _______ can't come over and help whatever you ask her to, because she's spending her Valentine's Day with me. If you ever try to drag her into one of your so-called emergencies, just so you know that she has her own things to take care of. She has a life to live, and she deserves people who care and respect her for who she is, not merely just the fact that she is single. Well, she is taken now. And she's mine. So back off if you please! Thank you!" 

              My mouth was in an "O" shape the whole time Hyukjae dealt with Raye. As he hung up, he handed me back my phone with a gentle smile, "You know, you should dump those negative people out of your life. They don't deserve your time. When you're with people who return what you've helped them with, they are the ones who should be called your friends. And they will be the biggest influence in your life."

              I blinked back tears as I threw my arms around him. "Thank you, Hyukjae! You are right. I should be happy with the people I want to hang out with, not to be treated like a dog."

              He hugged me back and kissed my head. "Let's go. It's getting dark." I smiled and wrapped my hand around his arm. While walking away from the theatre, I deleted all of the toxic people from my contact list, and it's like a heavy weight lifted off my shoulders. 

           We gushed more about our memories back in college, internships, friends' weddings, company parties, and any events that weave together into our 10 years of friendship. We decided to buy food from a street market. By the time we finished shopping, the snow accumulated. "Guess it's too cold to eat outside," Hyukjae muttered. 

       "Hmm..." I tapped my chin, "How about we go to my apartment? Mukbang and YouTube?" 

       "I'm in!" he nodded. 

       "Aren't you cold though?" I asked worriedly. His body was quivering like a leaf, and he was rubbing his arms with his gloved hands. 

       "I'm okay!" he replied, That jacket you're wearing isn't gonna warm you up. Plus your home is not far from here." 

       "You sure?" I raised my eyebrow. 

       "Aish! Jinja! Come on! My stomach screams, "Feed me!" " He waddled like a penguin with his hands clutching his upper arms, and I couldn't help but adore his adorableness and stubbornness. 

        Fifteen minutes later, we arrived at my apartment. Hyukjae breathed a sigh of relief when he stepped through the door. "Aahhhh! The glorious warmth!" He stretched his arms out and hopped onto the coach. "I think the last time I came to your place was before I got my second job." 

        "As a cashier?" I asked as I took the food out of the plastic bag. 

        "I believe so," he responded. "I got a spontaneous call from the manager, and I was sitting exactly right here. I was so happy that I got the job that I made you nearly spill your budae jjigae (spicy tteokbokki soup with tofu, ham, sausage, green onions, and glass noodles)." 

        "Oh my goodness! You hollered around my living room like a 5-years-old! I thought you were drunk for some reason!" 

        "I'm pretty sure I wasn't drunk. I was just happy that I made it." He immediately made himself comfortable as usual by switching on the TV and leaned back on the coach. I unpacked our containers of jjajangmyeon (black bean sauce noodles), kimbap (Korean version of sushi with rolled omelets, sausages, cucumbers, carrots, crab meat, and pickled radish). and fish cake skewers dipped in hot broth. Our first date wasn't as awkward as I thought. We hung out like usual, and I was happy that we didn't run out of things to talk about. I'm just incredibly grateful that Hyukjae's my best friend. I've known him for so long and I never knew that this day would be the day that we would take a big step. I took out a couple of pairs of chopsticks from the bag when suddenly two warm arms wrapped around my waist. I blushed at the contact, but I leaned my back onto his chest. 

          "You sure are picking up quickly," he whispered. 

          "What do you mean?" 

          "You've never been in a relationship before, but you seemed to know what to do." 

          "Let's just say I've been watching way too many romantic comedies and K-dramas," I admitted. 

          "That explains why you have Netflix in your TV menu." 

          "Whatever." I giggled. I turned around and wrapped my arms around him in return. I felt safe and secure in his small but muscular arms. My body fitted perfectly in his frame, and I felt good. New but good. I usually would hug him as a friendly gesture, but this time, the embrace meant the start of a new relationship.

           He nuzzled my head and sighed in contentment, "You smell good in my arms, you know?"

          My cheeks heated up more than before, causing me to hide my face in his chest. "I might have used a little too big of a handful of my shampoo," I mumbled. 

          "I like it." he commented, "I could get used to this strawberry scent." 

          I slapped his back lightly. "ert." 

          He chuckled and cupped my face for me to look at him. His warm, gentle dark brown eyes were now staring back at mine with affection. "__________, I look forward to this relationship. What do you think?" 

          "I feel the same way, Hyukjae. But...it's just that..." 

          "What?" 

          "It's just that...we've been friends for ten years, and...now that we're...you know...something more. Do you think it's weird?" 

          "I don't think so." he replied as he tucked the stray strands of my hair behind my left ear, "Whatever it is, I'm ready to face anything. And I'm happy to start my new relationship with my best friend. My friend who I know I can trust and who I've known so well. I know that you have more hidden gems about yourself waiting for me to discover. And I know that I will love them." 

           His sweet, honest words tugged my heartstrings instantly. "I'm with you. I'm happy to have you as my first real boyfriend. Wow, it's weird calling you that," I laughed softly, "but I'm excited about where this relationship will take us. You understand me more than the rest of my friends, and so I know I can count on you to make me feel loved and respected." 

           He leaned forward and sealed my lips with his. I didn't expect it, but I closed my eyes to immerse into his loving kiss. I kissed him back seconds after, and I could feel the sides of his lips curled into the biggest, most thankful smile.