I've always been chained down to the past, not being able to crawl past the darkness eventhough I can see the light -a hairbreadth away from my grasp, so near yet impossible. Then, after time passes by, I seems to be dreading the future as well. Scared that someday during my wake, I'd be hoping instead for someone to drag me back to the life when I was someone unwanted, begging food from my own family and living off humanity to survive in this cruel cruel world alone.

***

"How are you feeling today, Jinyoungie?" The woman dressed neatly in floral blouse crouched down to level her eyes with the little kid on the wheelchair.

He is skinny and pale, which reminded her of how a boy had looked like this too when he first arrived at the doorstep of the orphanage two years before. Unlike him, The boy didn't come alone though, he brought along a little blue-eyed kitten that was sleeping snuggly in his lap. He was so small back then, so lost and sad, a poor poor victim of a broken home.

Both The boy and Jinyoung were the youngest ones in this orphanage as the other kids are much older than them. Both only six years old, yet had lost so much. The world is not so kind towards them even at the tender age of childhood.

She's relieved that The boy would finally has a friend of the same age to play with him.

She patted his head and Jinyoung could feel the warmth of her callused palm spreading to his whole body. When she takes his tiny hand in hers and smiled lovingly, for the first time since he had woken up in this strange new world where he's left alone by his mama and papa, Jinyoung believed that God had sent an angel to save him.

"This is your home from now on, Jinyoung. Let's meet your other siblings, shall we?"

***

Giggles of laughter from outside the orphanage caught his attention. There's a group of older boys playing at the compound. The seven of them were chasing around a small red ball while trying to pin each other down on the soft grass while the girls was always playing with their dolls on the big mat. Jinyoung rolled his wheelchair to the threshold and stopped. He watched quietly as his eyes scanned each one of them.

It's been a week since he lives here. And another few weeks left before he could join them all to play. His legs had been itching to feel the ground beneath and to run on the open field. Jinyoung is a fast runner, he is sure he could beat his hyungs in football someday.

'What Jinyoung never knew is the fact that it would be hard for him to even start walking again.'

"Do you want to go outside? We can take a walk around." A voice asked him from behind as the mother figure of the orphanage walked towards him. She gripped the handle to adjust his view.

Jinyoung shook his head politely. His eyes searching for someone among the other kids. Geunyoung smiled when she saw exactly who Jinyoung is looking at.

"Ahh that's Jaebum. Don't you remember him? He helped you with your things when you first come here so he's not in the living room during introduction, but he did introduce his name beforehand right?"

The