'Heyyyyyyyy Minkyyyyyy'

 I heaved a chuckle at your excited tone of voice, sparkling eyes through the screen of my phone. Gwangju is a good look on you, I mused. Not much looked bad on you, but I adored the beanie (the one I bought for you for your birthday) and the family Christmas jumper you had on.

 'Hi Kyungwon, how's your vacation? And how are the Kangs?'

 There was a bit of angle adjusting on your part before I saw you laying down in your bed, the familiar Gudetama bedsheet catching my eyes and I smiled softly at you, who just shoved a big thumbs up in my face. Honestly, even the low quality of the camera couldn't help dimming that ridiculously bright dumb grin on your face, and I couldn't help reciprocating with one of mine.

 'It's great here! I updated my parents on how all of us are doing, they also wanted to know why you weren't here with me and I told them about how your dad wanted you to spend Christmas with your family this year. How are you doing by the way? Are your parents well?'

 'It's boring, if I'm honest. My parents are fine. Daddy isn't exactly the most available around the house though' I was lowkey annoyed because he took away the time I could have spent with you before we had to go back to our crazily busy schedules of work once the holiday was over. I did feel better knowing I'd spend New Year's Eve together with you in Seoul afterwards anyway 'and mommy is always at that tango dance class.'

 'Tango? Since when did that happen? I don't recall Mrs. Kim being so much into arts as much as she's into numbers the last time I visited' not that I would know either, my mom was always spontaneous.

 'Something about reminiscing old memories I suppose. I saw her chatting up with people I recognized from her old high school yearbook when she got off from those classes.'

 I laughed slightly at the eyebrows you just raised at me. You were probably imagining my mom, the well-known workaholic of an accountant of our family, twirling around in tango shoes with dramatic synth and bass blasting in the background. And I laughed out loud together with you, because it was a scene to even see my mother out of her office, not to mention actually doing physical activities.

 'Kyunghee asked about you too'

 There was a tone to your voice when you said it, but I couldn't place exactly what it was.

 Kyunghee was your fraternal twin sister, the same person who had boldly asked me out during the first Christmas I spent with your family. You hadn't been amused but I definitely had, though I skillfully hid it as I politely rejected and told her I was waiting for someone. That taken aback slash hopeful look on your face was priceless.

 I observed you now, your eyes narrowing into the distance where I assumed to be the direction of your younger twin's room and brows furrowing slightly. I tilted my head in question, and you knew the gesture well, immediately elaborating.

 'She asked when was I going to pull my head out of my to ask you on a date because if not, she was going to be the one to propose to you on a carousel in Lotte World and then later on have mini-Kyunghees and mini-Minkyungs running around our house. I wouldn't pass the possibility of her actually doing that, you're pretty amazing.'

 I snorted, and then laughed in amusement at the embarrassed expression on your face as well as the mental image of that happening. You were easily jealous and always got immensely embarrassed about it, something I found out shortly after we started dating when you growled at the poor waiter who wanted to ask me for my number and then blushed profusely afterwards, spewing apologies at me. You said you didn’t want to consider me as something you own just because we're dating, that you didn't mean to objectify me like that. I swooned in secret and we had our first kiss that night, a result of my immense love and gratefulness to you.

 'Baby, should I remind you I don't even like carousels? The only one proposing to me is going to be you and I don’t think you can manage that lest you start screaming out of fear'

 'The horses are creepy-looking okay! It wasn't my fault!'

 'I know baby, but even 5-year-olds could ride that fine without making a scene'

 You pouted, and I brought back my trademark puppy dog eyes to get you to soften. You did, as I expected, and huffed a heavy breath. I knew then it wasn't just about what your sister said, there was something else.

 'Kyungwonie, is there something wrong?'

 I held my breath as I waited, eyes following your pupils moving from where I assumed to be the chandelier on your ceiling to my face on your phone. I could feel you taking your time arranging your thoughts, and I let you. You were always like that, more often than not letting your actions speak for you instead of words. So when it comes to using words, you use your time and vocabulary wisely. And if it meant that I got constant reminder of how much you love me through the hugs you give and the kisses you plant on me, I would never change that about you.

 'Do you think we can tell everyone about our relationship?'

 You finally spoke after a pause that felt like forever, even if in reality lasted for only 5 minutes. I burried my head into my pillow, eyebrows raising in question and eyes widened at the suddenness of the question.

 And you had said it with so much hesitation, as if you thought I would need a moment to consider whether should I brag to the world that I got the most amazing girl to be my girlfriend.

 'Kyungwon, I would love that. Did you think I would say no?' I joke lightly, hoping to ease up your tensions.

 It did, and I could see you exhailing in relief. You looked into my eyes again, this time accompanying a finger to trace the line of my face on the digital screen. A sheepish smile on your face, a counter to the playful glare on mine.

 'It's not that. I was just worried' you said, that tint of hesitation still there and I didn't like it.

 'About what?'

 'Telling people that we're dating is a serious step, I think. We've only been dating for a few months  but god knows how long have I been waiting to call you my girlfriend. It's just…'

 You paused in the middle of your sentence, and I gave what I hope to be a soft smile to assure you that I was here, I was listening and I wasn't going anywhere. You smiled at me, prompting my heart to skip a beat, a normal thing for it to do ever since I've met you for the first time years ago.

 'I'm hesitant in telling people we're dating because I still can't believe I'm calling the woman I've loved for the past 4 years my girlfriend'

 'I wake up everyday and ask myself if this was a dream, because what I wake up to every morning was your beautiful face and a smile that let me know you love me as much as I love you. You kiss me good morning and suddenly everything feels light, I feel like I'm in heaven and I have asked myself more than once whether was I really dead and were hallucinating'

 'But then you would interrupt my musings by bopping my nose with your finger, a questioning glance in your eyes and would softly ask me where have I gone to. I never told you how surreal all this is to me. Now that we're about to tell everyone, it started getting real and I felt like a brick had hit me in the face'

 You fell silent but I knew you cut yourself off because of the tears rolling down my cheeks you could see through the screen. I chuckled tearily before prompting you to continue, because this was important and you needed to let it out as much as I needed to listen.

 'It's a good kind of brick, because for all I know, I could be hallucinating all of this and you could be dating some muscle man senior in our university and I wouldn't know. But, to have people outside from us knowing about this relationship is something like a mark of recognition, not that I need it to love you. I know I do. And I'd love you even if we're in the 16th century where gays are in danger of being burnt alive for loving whoever they love. But this, being out is like a sign of acception and pride as well as a wakeup call, it helps me know that this is damn real because god knows how serious I take this relationship and how much I want to show you off, Kim Minkyung.'

 'I want to show the whole world that I'm lucky enough to be holding the most precious woman in my arms everyday and tell her that I love her whenever I want and whenever she needs to hear. I want to shout from the rooftop, that I'm lucky to have you love me the same way I love you'

 We both fell into silence after that. You were awaiting my response and I felt like no words could describe the swelling feeling of my heart beating for you at the moment. So I braved up a smile, a teary smile nonetheless but it got you smiling back, your chocolate browns shining back at me and I knew then, that you were the one for me.

 'I would love it, Kyungwon. Let's tell the world about our love.'