Dear Park Jimin, 

I hope what you're about to read is going to hurt. 

I know it's selfish but I think I have the right to be a little selfish because you left me. 

You ing left me after all the time we spent together. All our kissess, hugs, late-night phone calls, dancing under the rain , and promises I swear to keep but you never did.

So, yeah I kind of have the right to be a little ty. 

After all, you left me. Not the other way around like you always feared. 

December 25, 2013

There was something greatly comical about watching people get rejected in public. It's tragically comical especially if the one getting rejected on Christmas day was an adorably hilarious guy named Park Jimin. I'm not saying I enjoy watching the person I have secretly liked for the past ten years get rejected but that's exactly what I'm saying. I silently thanked the girl who was as of now walking away from Park Jimin. 

"Let's see... is this your....", I began to number off with my fingers and held all ten fingers in front of Jimin's face to indicate I have lost count, "twentieth time getting rejected?" I laughed as Jimin hit me lightly on my back, but he soon burst into laughter. 

"I don't know why I keep getting rejected. I' mean I think I'm pretty nice, gentle, and good-looking!" Jimin turned around and moved his face close to mine. Every time he did that I could feel my heart stop and feel physical pain of air getting caught in my throat unable to release. Ten years and I still can't get used to his stupid face that was too good for this world. 

I smiled and lightly pushed him away and kept walking. 

I could hear Jimin running to catch up with my faster strides and I would purposely walk slower so we could walk side by side. 

I liked walking next to Jimin as he rambled on about everything from his dog to the new flavored candy he ate last week. I would nod along with his comment, laugh at his funny stories, and add my stories whenever he brought up our high school memories. 

My love for Park Jimin started in high school and never ceased until now that we have both became 28.

"Funny isn't it how we grew from high school kids ditching school for hip hop concerts became vets? I guess we are pretty smart, huh?" Jimin ellbowed me and I caught a glance of his bright smile and couldn't help but run my hand through his soft brown hairs. 

Park Jimin, this fool, will never know the reason I became a doctor. I was never one for animals but you were. You showed me your "pets" from dogs to birds, for a person that never once felt passion for anything fell in love with your passion. I was never one for animals but I was the one for you. In a sense, you gave me dream and love all at once. But you see, I can never say this out loud, ever.   

We walked in silence for a while as snowflakes began to fall from the sky. I kept on walking but Jimin suddenly stopped in front of a flower shop that was closing up for the day. 

"Park Jimin?" It was getting colder but Jimin just stood in front of the shop without responding to me. As if to finally made up his mind, Jimin broke into a wide grin and walked inside the flower shop. He sometimes did spontaneous things that came to his mind, sometimes spur of the moment decisions but most times things that has been on his mind for a while. I waited for him outside the shop and after few minutes he walked out with a beautiful boquet of red roses. 

"Merry Christmas, Min Yoongi." He handed me the roses with the biggest smile I have ever seen before. 

"You must thought I was really stupid not to notice the way you have been looking at me for the past ten years. You're in love with me. And you're even dumber to not have realized how much I love you. Min Yoongi, I love you so much. So much more than a friend. Please don't reject me." This was day when we finally came clean on our hidden feelings that ran too deep for neither of us to actually express. 

The first thing I asked you was why you kept on asking girls out and your answer? "Because you always looked so happy when I got rejected."

And you asked me why I became a vet despite my lack of interest in animals. "Because of my overflowing interest in you." 

We were both so concious of each others feelings that now I think about it, we have wasted ten extra years to be happy togther before you left me forever. 

You gave me 15 years of happiness and lifetime of sorrow. 

I'll never be able to love anyone as beautifully as I have loved you,