People always say that loneliness is the worst thing in life. When the night comes, it will occupy your mind with the dark thoughts.

“Why are you still here?”

“You’re just insignificant to others, your existence is nothing,”

“No one cares about you, even when you’re gone, no one will notice.”

 The later it gets, the louder it will be.

Then, you will find yourself agreeing to those thoughts.

“Why am I still here?”

“My presence is insignificant to others, my existence is nothing,”

“No one cares about me, even when I’m gone, no one will notice.”

The longer you are awake, the more you get convinced.

The more you get convinced, the more you think about death.

However, then you will stop a bit, thinking of how things will go after that?

Will the pain stop?

Will you be happy?

Will you finally be free?

The more you think about it, then the sadder you will get.

Because the sad thing about death is to die while feeling lonely. That even in your last day of living, it will just be you and you only. “Am I really not worth of happiness?” you will catch yourself asking you and just like that your days will be filled with sadness. The sorrow you feel will keep hitting you over and over again to the point your heart starts getting numb and you will feel nothing.

You will forget how it feels to be able to laugh,

You will forget how it feels to be able to cry.

Perhaps you will still do that but doing and feeling are two different things.

However, from years of holding on, Sehun has different point of view.

No, being lonely isn’t the worst thing in life, but being a coward is.

Have you ever experienced how even breathing can be so hard and that you can’t think about anything else but giving up on life? You always feel overwhelmed because of the thoughts and how they keep haunting you even in your dreams?

Should I just crash my car into another car? Should I just cut my wrist? How about eating all the sleeping pills in one go? Or perhaps letting myself getting hit by the train?

So many thoughts but you can’t bring yourself to do that because you are a coward. You feel all pained but you are afraid of the upcoming pain, you are afraid of death, and that’s where the torture starts.

That is how Sehun feeling at the moment. He has lost count of how many times he had killed himself on his mind but he can’t seem to find himself to succeed. To say that he is living a hard life is an understandable.

What makes it harder is how no one will listen to him.

His parents will call him insane.

His brother is being away most of the time.

His friends will just compare his problems with theirs.

Even if someone comes and willing to listen, he will find it hard to explain how he is really feeling.

Sehun sighs, a deep sigh. His chest feels hurt a bit and his head gets a bit dizzy. Sometimes he just can wish disappearing can be as easy as deactivating his social media accounts.

People always say that loneliness is the worst thing in life. When the night comes, it will occupy your mind with the dark thoughts.

“Why are you still here?”

“You’re just insignificant to others, your existence is nothing,”

“No one cares about you, even when you’re gone, no one will notice.”

 The later it gets, the louder it will be.

Then, you will find yourself agreeing to those thoughts.

“Why am I still here?”

“My presence is insignificant to others, my existence is nothing,”

“No one cares about me, even when I’m gone, no one will notice.”

The longer you are awake, the more you get convinced.

The more you get convinced, the more you think about death.

However, then you will stop a bit, thinking of how things will go after that?

Will the pain stop?

Will you be happy?

Will you finally be free?

The more you think about it, then the sadder you will get.

Because the sad thing about death is to die while feeling lonely. That even in your last day of living, it will just be you and you only. “Am I really not worth of happiness?” you will catch yourself asking you and just like that your days will be filled with sadness. The sorrow you feel will keep hitting you over and over again to the point your heart starts getting numb and you will feel nothing.

You will forget how it feels to be able to laugh,

You will forget how it feels to be able to cry.

Perhaps you will still do that but doing and feeling are two different things.

However, from years of holding on, Sehun has different point of view.

No, being lonely isn’t the worst thing in life, but being a coward is.

Have you ever experienced how even breathing can be so hard and that you can’t think about anything else but giving up on life? You always feel overwhelmed because of the thoughts and how they keep haunting you even in your dreams?

Should I just crash my car into another car? Should I just cut my wrist? How about eating all the sleeping pills in one go? Or perhaps letting myself getting hit by the train?

So many thoughts but you can’t bring yourself to do that because you are a coward. You feel all pained but you are afraid of the upcoming pain, you are afraid of death, and that’s where the torture starts.

That is how Sehun feeling at the moment. He has lost count of how many times he had killed himself on his mind but he can’t seem to find himself to succeed. To say that he is living a hard life is an understandable.

What makes it harder is how no one will listen to him.

His parents will call him insane.

His brother is being away most of the time.

His friends will just compare his problems with theirs.

Even if someone comes and willing to listen, he will find it hard to explain how he is really feeling.

Sehun sighs, a deep sigh. His chest feels hurt a bit and his head gets a bit dizzy. Sometimes he just can wish disappearing can be as easy as deactivating his social media accounts.