I heard the alarm ringing, I felt Kris's breath, I felt his hand roaming on my back, I felt his frustration when he pushed his face into the pillow, I heard him sighing and then I couldn't hear the alarm, I couldn't feel his hand on me, I couldn't feel his warm breath. 
I opened my eyes and saw the emptiness beside me. I looked up and saw him running a hand down his face as he was trying to wake up. I looked at the gorgeous man, my heart skipped a bit. I loved him... I truly loved him. Did he love me as well....?
" You woke up baby?"
His eyes were on me. I looked at his gaze, were there really warm? Or it was just me wishing them to be warm?
" Yes... good morning..."
A shade of worrisome covered his face. He sat on the bed and kissed my head.
" Are you ok Luhan?"
I blinked slightly, and stared at him again. I was dying to ask him that... if he loved me.... if he really loved me....
" Luhan baby are you sure? We can take the day off"
I opened my lips, could feel them trembling, but I couldn't ask that.
" Let's.... let's take the day off"
He smiled, a little smile, and then he kissed my forehead, leaving his lips there and letting me feel their moves as he talked again.
" Everything you want Lu"
He laid down and wrapped his arm around my shoulders, pulling me to himself.
" What should we do? Should we just rest here or go out?"
I just kept on staring. Hed he ever loved me? Was he real right then? His affections.... were they real?
" Luhan... Luhan talk to me"
His voice had some concern in them, so his eyes. I brought my hand to his face and touched his jaw. I slightly rubbed it. And then whispered.
" I just want to be with you"
His eyes... I couldn't read them. He was shocked, amused, worried. Taking my hand and pressing it to his lips, he closed his eyes, taking them from me.
" I am with you, always"
Do you love me? The words got caught in my throat. I wanted to swallow the lamp and cry out loud. But then I just ended up smiling, a bitter one for me and a sweet one for him. 
" I ... Kris... do you... I mean do you.... it's.... do you ... no, have you ever... really... I...I just..."
I couldn't see clearly anymore, I wanted to cry, tears fell down my cheeks, I could feel the salty taste. I closed my eyes and cried, and cried, and cried. He said nothing, just hold onto me tighter and touched me more. Feeling his warmth, I cried more. I was scared... was he real? Was he there because he loved me? Or he was just there.... as a duty... 
I didn't know how much time has passed... I didn't care. Finally, I opened my eyes and looed up, taking in his blurry picture.
" ... I love you..."
I blurted out with a shaken voice, but I said it. I looked into his eyes and said it again.
" I love you Kris"
And again... and again...
" I truly love you... I really do.... I love you.... I love you... I love you... you are the only one on my mind, in my heart, I love you... it's like you are written all over my heart... like all my heart screams is your name... I....I.... I.... lo..."
My lips git captured into his lips. It wasn't an innocent peck, it wasn't an aggressive kiss, it was a seal... I blinked. I could feel love through the kiss but I wanted more... I wantd more if it... more assurance.
I pulled back.
" Tell me... Kris please... do you... do you really..."
" Do I really love you?"
His voice was sharp. I nodded and waited eagerly.
" Do I really love you Luhan? What do you think so?"
" I don't want to think! I want you to tell me! I want you to tell me the answer!"
He chuckled.
" We have been together for four years doesn't it prove something?"
I couldn't control myself, I pushed him and left the bed.
" Prove?! No! It proves nothing! What if you just stayed! What if you don't love me... what if yoi have never loved me...!"
Again, I couldn't stop the tears. I felt broken, I felt horror. Why wouldn't he just answer me... why was he hesitating...
" Luhan, come here"
That voice was serious. I stood there for some moments and then stumbled to him.I felt his hand searching for my own hand. He took at and pulled it up. He touched the palm and the he moved his lips to my wrest. He kissed tge vein over and over again. And then he started talking.
" I remember , when you talked about veins, and how much you love them, how beautiful they look. I remember them all..."
He looked at me and smiled. Then he looked at my wrest again, he brought his other hand and started tracing the vein line on my wrest.
" You love it when I do this... it has been some time since I have done it. I miss doing this"
" I missed you doing this"
I said with a small voice.
" I am sorry, will you forgive me?"
He tugged on my hand and hugged me in my hips, buried his head in my chest.
" I met you thirteen years ago... when we were just brats. Do you remember? When I pushed you to tye ground?"
I brushed his hair and nodded slightly.
" I take the tug as a yes"
He chuckled and pulled me closer.
" I just did that so you would notice me"
" Wha..."
" I have always, always wanted you. The first day I saw you, I wanted to hug you and tell everyone that you were mine. But I couldn't. I waited for a year, but then I couldn't control myself. I pushed you and then you knew I was there"
Another laugher was heard. I couldn't talk, I couldn't move. That was what I was longing to hear... what I was craving for...
" Then I made sure you saw me everywhere, and then I made sure you were with me, everywhere. Mine. And eventually you fell into my trap. You finally looked at me with love Luhan..."
He pulled away and looked at me with the sweet smile of his.
" I was so happy, do you remember? When..."
" You hugged me... and you told me..."
"... I love you..."
"... I love you..."
I couldn't stop the smile from forming on my lips as I couldn't stop the tears. I loved the sound I heard. It calmed my heart, calmed my soul.
" I love you Luhan, I have loved you from the very first moment I saw you and I loved you more as days passed."
He caressed my cheek.
" And now... I love you. And I will love you tomorrow... and the next day, the next month, the next year, even in my next life"
I chuckled.
" I love you Kris, thank you....aaaaaahhhh"
He pushed me into the mattress and laid upon me.
" Just a small sorry? You doubted me baby"
I blinked innocently.
" I was scared... I was scared of not to be loved by you...."
" Why would you think about that in the first place"
He frowned and pressed me harder.
" I am sorry..."
He kissed my jaw.
" Just a small sorry won't heal my heart"
I hummed and touched his bangs.
" I will tell you I love you a thousand times"
He pulled an eyebrow and thought for some seconds.
" Why won't you let me love thousand times?"

                                               * * *

I laid between his arms smiling. I couldn't help smiling. His words earlier and then his love making... they just made me feel safe, and loved. The break down I felt hurt pretty much, but then he turned them all into a sweet feeling of love. I was thankful for all that.

I looked at his face, his eyes were checking me with love and concern. And then, I was sure of their truth. I smiled wider. 

" I love you"

" I love you"