“Hello,Jihyun!” my classmates greeted me as soon as I walk in to the door.Everyone knows me,well it’s not because I’m super smart or talented my friends concluded that it was because I am a very bright person,someone who would smile when I see an acquaintance of mine and would laugh easily except if it’s a little corny or outdated jokes,like dad jokes.

“Ah~ I can’t carry this life anymore too much homework!”my friend Jennie wailed while I just pat her back and told her “But you are very smart person and—fighting!” I give her a thumbs up while she just sigh and replied “Fine,fine! Thanks for the compliment I guess”.She sat on her respective seat and opened her notebook.

“Jihyun-ah,wanna come to this convention? It’s like a gathering for Kpop fans”my friend Lisa who is seated in front of me asked while grinning,she is the best performer I had ever seen in my entire life,”Yah! How could I miss going there? I heard you are joining”.She looks at me with surprised face which I find her so cute and would sometimes comment that I want to kidnap her “How did you know?”.

“Well I’m your fan!”And then I laughed.

But then…

After school,I went to my own apartment,yes,my parents bought me an apartment since I’m already in Senior high school and then I look at myself in my mirror.

Yah,you’re a waste of money and air 

You have no brain and talent at all

Everyday those voices won’t stop,I thought it would disappear just like before but these days,no,these month I have been feeling sad for no reason at all.Maybe,it was just overthinking like what my cousin said but
 why does these voices control my life?

 To the point I couldn’t control it?

What was the problem?

Everything is perfect

I have no right

To complain

It hurts everytime,everytime I hear those voices and yet I don’t want them to be gone because the moment I forgot them the reality shows me where those voices came from.

“Jihyun!!” Jennie kept door knocking Jihyun’s house for 1 and a half hour and she also kept trying to call her but to no one is picking up so the now crying Jennie called Jihyun’s parents to inform them that Jihyun isn’t picking up calls or opening her apartment .The parents came furious at their daughter whom they think is currently missing or out with some friends they opened the door with their own spare key and was greeted by darkness until they found their daughter in her bedroom sleeping her best sleep in her entire existence beside her are bottles of medicine.

“Jihyunnie!” her mother shouted to her daughter before sitting on the floor where her daughter was “Call an ambulance! Call an ambulance!”
But everything was too late.
When does it went wrong? Jennie who has stayed with Jihyun for the longest time keep asking her self,she can’t help to keep looking at empty chair which is Jihyun’s.That chair which is filled with glow whenever Jihyun was there.Ah! Maybe it was when I told her she’s very dramatic.

Flashback: By that time Jennie who saw Jihyun’s account in twitter stalk her account for fun but what she saw is so depressing tweets on top of that at the same night Jihyun messaged Jennie about suicide and such but she only replied those people are very dramatic.

At that time Jihyun was crying for help.

The parents of Jihyun,Mr and Mrs Kim who were always smiling especially when they’re infront of their business partners now looks like zombie and wouldn’t go out of their house.Mrs Kim would always went inside their eldest daughter’s room which is Jihyun and would look at the picture and sometimes sleep at her bed.What happened Jihyunnie?

Flashback : Everyday Jihyun would always get yelled at not being like her younger sister who is very helpful,that made Jihyun sad and upset but what stacked her mind is when her mom would be always say that those who killed themselves,are selfish.On top of that,whenever she wants to open up her problem she’ll say “You can do it yourself”.

At first Jihyun was asking for comfort and encouragement and lastly she wants her mom to see her pain.

Kai,who is also a best friend of Jihyun who knows her depression as Kai went through the same pain she did hasn’t eaten anything after hearing the news,he can’t even look at the empty chair in the classroom  as Jihyun and him are classmates.The one and only who ever saw his pain and saw what he wants and supports him is Jihyun.You see,Kai likes guys and his parents sure wouldn’t like that and also his friends now strangers but when it comes to Jihyun,she saw her genuine support for it.Moreover,Jihyun has always complimented him and bit by bit he heals.

Around that time she wants some compliment and maybe some hug too.

Lisa,who has been crying for hours after receiving the news opened the black box it was Jihyun’s last gift to her, actually everyone who is close to her receive the same small black box and with the same printed letter.

I love you all and I don’t hate anyone of you.

Lisa thought “ Her heart is really too big, she is worried to all of us”

But what they didn’t know she was telling everyone that she suffered a lot