Jonghyun, how much pain did you feel in order for you to end your life this way? Just a little more resistence, and you could've went back to the times where you couldn't feel as miserable as you were now. Now you're gone, and left your family and all of your fans behind. It's hard to describe my feelings. It feels like I'm swallowing needles. At first I thought it was a joke. My friends in school told me that you ended your life but I still didn't believe it because I thought it was just a sick prank. Even though I'm not a hardcore fan of yours, your music and your personality was respected. I never how much you were suffering behind that facade you put up in all of your fans. Now that you're gone, people will only be able to see your smile in pictures and video. You drowned beneath all of your anguish and decided to leave this cruel, unforgiving world. You tried to run away from yourself, the thing that you despised the most, and now your own hatred has consumed you. 

But you still worked hard. You made so many people happy. You gifted them with your smile that resembled the sun. You were a massive influence to popular K-Pop groups like 2PM and BTS. You've tried hard, you've tried to make everyone happy, you've tried to make yourself happy, but the bitterness you felt arising within yourself withered you away. You've tried calling out for help, but the only thing you got was agony. It pushed you to the point where you lit charcoal briquettes and poisoned yourself with carbon monoxide. Now, everybody is weeping, weeping at the fact that you were suffering to the point where you committed suicide. They are blaming themselves for not being able to help you, and not being able to ease your crippling loneliness. They are also happy though, since you are now free from the shackles of fame and ascended to a place where you won't have to feel these wretched feelings anymore. The feeling called pain that refused to let you cry out for help will now be put to rest along with your physical and mental being. This date will forever be remembered in our hearts.

Farewell, Jonghyun. Rest in peace. ♥

12/18/17