There was nobody, not one person, that Moriya Akane despised more in the world than Sugai Yuuka. It's not like she could place it exactly—maybe it was her too-sweet smile or the poise she carried herself with down the halls, or how she always raised her hand for the teacher to call on her in class.

Spoiled brat. That's what she was—she had money, and friends, and talent. But most of all, she was better than Akane. And that is what caused the most fury to ride through her bones, becuase no one was better than Moriya ing Akane. No one.

"Horseback riding club!" Mizuho remarked. They're perusing the gym, which is packed full of people and tables advertising a variety of clubs and extracurriculars, all which Akane wasn't very interested in—she's already got too much to deal with.

She scoffed. "What, you want to ride horses now?"

"No..." Mizuho paused. "But Sugai Yuuka is club president! She's so sweet, and welcoming. I just wanted to be..." Her voice trailed off.

"She's not that cool." Akane muttered, bitterness in her tone barely hidden.

"What do you have against her? Everyone loves Yuuka." Mizuho said, passing a tiny wave in the direction of the horseback club's table.

"Sure." Akane pulled back the hair tie that lay snug against her wrist with one finger, and let it snap back violently against her skin. "Everyone."

The tennis ball flew at Akane, hurtling towards her like a neon green missile. Her eyes narrowed and she swung the racket, feeling the shattering contact between it and the ball, watching as the ball moved at an increasing velocity across the court towards the terrified freshman at the other end. 

The ball bounced once on the ground next to the younger student's feet.

"Good serve." Akane remarked. "But you've got to be ready for even more power coming back."

"Captain," a tiny voice hoarsely requested from the bench, "Can we please take a water break?"

"Not until you've all practiced serving. This team isn't easy."

"Jesus." Kyoko said from behind her, leaning against the meshy fence of the court. "Be a little easy on them, Captain." 

Akanen unsnapped the hairtie around her wrist, and pulled back her hair into a ponytail. "We're not going to win the championships by being easy on them." She turned to the bench of nervous freshmen. "Next?"

"Six advanced classes?" Aoi gasped.

Akanen said nothing back to her sister, only twirling the limp noodles on her plate around her fork.

"We're very proud of her." her mother remarked, with a smile. "Hopefully you can perform at that level, soon."

Aoi stared down at her plate. "I'm only a freshman."

"It's never too early." 

Akane twitched at those words—she knew them too well. 

"Can I be excused? I have to study for a test tomorrow." 

"Of course, sweetie."

"Me too?" Aoi asked.

"No, stay and finish your food."

Akanen carried her plate into the dimly lit kitchen.

The scratching of Akanen's pencil on paper was loud—too loud. She couldn't think, not one bit. Her brain was too jumbled, and images of the textbook that she stared at for several hours last night floated across her vision—but she couldn't remember any of the damn words. 

.

She'd never been quite proficient at science. She was ahead of the normal students, sure, but when placed next to the smart ones, it was hard not to feel like she was behind. And now, this physics test was going to be the end of her grade point average. 

Out of the corner of her eye, a hand shot into the air. 

"Are you done?" the teacher asked. 

"Of course." 

That voice. That face, glasses resting on the bridge of her nose, black hair swept just so over her shoulder—Sugai Yuuka. Always one step ahead.

Akane gripped the pencil tighter, dragged it so hard against the paper that the lead crumbled and snapped. 

She felt like a failure.

"There's a party this weekend. You coming?" Kyoko asked, handing Akane a bottle of Gatorade.

"No. I have to study."

"You're no fun, Captain."

"No fun gets me places." Akane remarked back, long fingers drumming on the plastic of the unopened bottle in her hand, breath still slowing from the run she had just taken around the court.

"You'll never have a youth when you act like this." Kyoko smiled, but there was a tinge of pity in her eyes. Akane hated that. She never needed anyones pity.

"I never had a ing youth in the first place." She turned and walked away. She couldn't stand anyone right now.

"Moriya, can I talk to you for a few minutes after class?"

Akane looked up at her teacher, and though her stomach felt like it was a crashing tidal wave of vomit and anxiety, she smiled. "Sure." 

 "I'm concerned about your grade." 

Akane looked around the room. Everyone was shuffling out the door, eager to escape with the bell. Even Yuuka.

The teacher gently slid a paper across the table, a sad look in her eyes, a look of pity. 

It was her test, and on it—50/100. An F.

Akane had never gotten an F in her life.

She swallowed, head dizzy.

"I know you're a very smart girl, I just want to know that you're doing ok. Are you studying? Is everything ok at home?"

"I—" She tried to stop herself from choking on her own breath. "I'm fine. It was just a mistake. I'll fix it. I have practice I..." She gripped the strap of her bag. "I have to go." 

On her way out the door, she crumpled the test in her hand.

The next lunch period, she avoided Mizuho, and instead found a quiet spot at the end of the hallway near the English rooms. 

Gently, she pulled her physics textbook from her bag, quickly leafing through pages and observing her notes. She had written all over it—notes in pen, highlighter, everything. Why wouldn't it stick?

She turned to a new page, finger following the words as slowly as she could. 

Studying normally came so easily, so why did she feel so weak and helpless in this moment? Surely she was better than this.

She felt tears—ing ugly tears running down her cheeks—and her hands quivering. She couldn't do this. She couldn't live up to what anyone wanted. Failure—there's that word again.

"Need some help?"

Akane looked up, and her sadness immediately churned to anger—because the girl standing above her was Sugai Yuuka.

"Not from you." Akane said, trying to sound rude and standoffish, but it didn't really help that she was choking on her tears.

"Physics is my best subject you know." Yuuka said, kneeling down so she was at Akane's eye level. 

"ing fantastic for you."

"I know you don't like me."

"I hope I made it obvious." Akane replied quickly, wiping her eyes with her sweater sleeve.

"But I think you're very talented, and good at sports, and very pretty. I admire you."

Akane looked down. Why did Yuuka's voice have to be so soft and calming?

"I could never do what you could do when you're playing tennis. We can't be good at everything."

"I don't need help."

"Well," Yuuka adjusted her position so that she was sitting against the wall next to Akane, "That's fine. I'll just sit here for the rest of lunch if you don't mind."

Akane shifted uncomfortably—she wanted to get up and move, but there was no place else to go on the school. Even the library was crowded and loud. 

Yuuka unpacked her bento with gentle hands, humming to herself and twirling her chopsticks in her fingers. 

Akane looked back down at the textbook. She had to focus.

The words still seemed to escape her—she was so used to speed reading, grabbing the concepts almost instantly, but instead, all she felt was anxiety. Atoms? atoms. Nothing made a of sense.

"You know, if you look at it from another perspective, it becomes quite simple." Yuuka remarked. Goddamnit, Akane had almost forgotten she was there for a second.

"I told you, I don't need help."

Yuuka pulled a piece of paper from her bag, and clicked her pen. Slowly, she drew a circle in the center of the paper. Everything she did was so delicate and so pr—Akane shut her eyes and shook her head, as if to expel that incoming thought.

"You don't have to explain it to me like I'm five." she snapped.

"Shh." Yuuka replied, as if telling a dog to stop barking. Akane felt apalled—no one had ever told her to be quiet, because she was always the one in charge. 

"Every atom is made up of protons, neutrons, and electrons, right?" Yuuka continued. "But what makes them different is the number of those things." She scribbled small circles on the center of the larger one she had drawn.

Akane felt herself instinctively lean closer.

"The neutrons and protons are in the center, the nucleus, and then the electrons orbit around. But because they come in different amounts, that's what makes the difference between a gold atom and an iron atom."

Akane paused—because the pieces were clicking in her head, whatever the textbook had said seemed more than a jumble of long words.

" you. This makes sense."

"It's hard following a college level textbook. Sometimes you just need to simplify it." Yuuka smiled, all pretty and flowery, and Akane wanted to say she hated it, but she wasn't sure if she did.

There was a shattering noise—the ring of the bell, which was just above them on the wall. 

"Don't you dare tell anyone you helped me." Akane hissed, slamming shut the textbook. She looked down at the floor. "But...thank you."

"Anytime!" 

Akane felt her cheeks hot with embarassment, with shame, with something she wasn't even sure of. As Yuuka got up to leave, she noticed her drawing of the atom still lay on the floor. Akane bent down to pick it up.

A week went by.

In the halls, Akane ducked out of sight. She sat with her friends. She didn't think about Yuuka, or tried not to—but that was hard.

But then, when she found herself staring at her physics textbook alone in her room, she realized she was once again, utterly lost. 

Picking up her phone, she dialed Mizuho. 

"Akanen!" the voice on the other end exclaimed. "You never call!"

"Um, Habu..." Akane leaned back in her chair, staring at the textbook lit only by her bright desk lamp. "Do you have... uh... well, I know you wanted to join horseback club, and I was wonderinng if you had Yuuka's phpne number?"

"Of course!" Mizuho cheerily replied. "Why?"

"It's not important. Just text it to me." She hung up before Mizuho could reply. 

Thus came the first time Yuuka had ever stepped a foot into Akane's home. 

It was a Saturday night, her parents out, her sister at ballet—just perfect. No one to witness her moment of shame, letting her enemy into her own home.

"You have a very lovely house." Yuuka pleasantly remarked as she removed her shoes.

"You don't have to be nice to me. You just have to teach me physics. I'll pay you. This is a business relationship. Purely."

"I think it's good to be nice, don't you think?"

"I don't need your annoying pleasantries and philosophies." Akane replied, anxiously tapping her foot on the floor. "You bother me." she said, quieter this time.

"I can see why all your little teammates fear you." Yuuka said with a chuckle, and her laugh was like a fairy—no it wasn't, Akane battled with herself in her head. She's evil.

"Fear is the best way to learn. If they fear me, they'll get better."

"Actually," Yuuka hummed, placing her shoes in a neat pair by the door, "they say the best way to learn is through meaning. The more meaning you give something, the better you remember it. Semantic encoding, is what it's called."

"Are you insinuating that I don't give my physics enough meaning?"

"I never mentioned physics. Do you mind if I grab a refreshment from the kitchen? I don't want to trespass, but I am a little parched."

"Sure, whatever."

When Yuuka returns with an extra can of Coke for Akane even though she never asked for one, her heart skips a beat, though she doesn't want to admit it.

Lunch meetings become a regular—down in the corner at the end of the English hall, as always. Akane kind of hates that she looks forward to them.

Sometimes, when Yuuka reads aloud terms from the textbook in those calming tones of hers, Akane stares at her lips. It's not on purpose, she swears. 

"Where've you been at lunch?" Mizuho questions during European history, when Akane runs in almost late.

"Studying."

"Your face is awful red."

She doesn't reply.

The changing room smells like ty deodrant and sweat, but it's a strange safe-haven for Akane after every practice. ing her tennis shirt, she notices Kyoko come in.

"How's it been, Captain?" 

"Ok. The freshmen are getting better."

"No, not tennis, you silly , I mean life."

"It's fine."

There's a long pause, and Kyoko begins to undress."

Akane inhales.

"Hey Kyoko?"

"Yeah, Captain?"

"I have a weird question."

Kyoko pulls off a sock with a single tug. "Shoot."

"Is it possible to... hate someone so much that you kind of like them?"

She hears Kyoko snicker. "What do you mean?"

Akanen finds her fingers fumbling on the buttons of her uniform. 

"I mean... Well... Say you really don't like someone, and you hate them more than anything, but... you keep thinking about them, and noticing all their good features, and finding more things to like about them..."

"Sounds like you're in love, or some of that bull."

Akane's eyes widen.

Kyoko continues, holding back a laugh. "Let me guess. Is it Yu-" 

"Shut up!" She turns to face her sub-captain. "Listen. Don't you dare tell anyone about this ing conversation, you hear me. I only asked you because I trust you. Don't go and screw me over." She inhales. "."

"I promise I won't, Captain." Kyoko replies, placing a hand on Akane's shoulder. "Hey, you have deodorant i can borrow?"

"Moriya!" her teacher remarks, handing back a new test. "You've improved remarkably!" 

Akane stares at the B written in blue ink by her name. Normally a B felt like a grade of shame—but for today, it was an achievement. 

She looks across the room and sees Yuuka, who gives her an encouraging thumbs up and a smile. Akane instinctively smiles back.

She's leaning against the lockers, waiting for Mizuho, when she hears two boys talking. 

"Isn't Winter Formal soon?" one remarks. 

"Yeah." says the other. "I still don't have a date."

"You know, I was thinking of asking Sugai Yuuka."

Akane twitched at that name, and strained to recognize the boy's faces—but they're just boring popular boys, not worth her time.

"Dude!" the other replied. "You know she's so prim and prissy, but I bet she's a real freak."

Anger seethes in Akane's bones.

"I'll ask her at lunch today, dude. That needs a real man to show her around."

Akane's face gets hotter and hotter. But she doesn't say anything. 

Next period she sees him. In her English class. She'd never given a about him before—but now she can't stop looking at him.

He raises his hand. "Can I go to the bathroom?"

The teacher looks up from her desk. "Oh sure."

An urge curdles in Akanen's stomach, and her hand shoots into the air. 

"May I too?"

The teacher nods.

Akanen pushes out of her chair as the other boy exits the room, and watches as he turns down the hall. 

She follows, a few paces behind, as he walks to the bathroom. 

All the classes nearby are testing, and the halls are quiet and empty.

She picks up the speed of her feet, until she's not too far behind him.

And right as he reaches for the door, she grabs the collar of his ugly lavender polo shirt, and pulls, hard.

"What the !?" he chokes, as Akane pushes him inside the bathroom, which is luckily empty—an internal sigh of relief washes over her system.

She pushes him against the wall, and is a little surprised at her own strength.

"Moriya Akane?" he sputters. "Let go of me, !"

"No." she says coldly. "I need to talk to you."

"Let go!"

"You are not going to ask out Sugai Yuuka to winter formal. In fact, you're never going to talk to her, ever again."

"H-" 

Akane shuts him up with a quick punch to the gut.

"You don't deserve her. And if you ing go near her, I'll literally rip you from limb to limb, you hear me?"

"Jeez, I mean—"

"I said, do you hear me?" she said, lowering her voice into almost a growl.

"Yes." he slowly replies.

"And this—" Akane raises her right leg, eyes narrow, "is for calling her a ." 

And with that, she kicks him swiftly in between the legs.

"I heard you beat up someone for me." Yuuka remarks, tucking a pencil behind her ear.

It's another dim Saturday night.

"Rumors spread fast, I guess." Akane mutters, not making eye contact. "And I didn't beat him up. I just kicked him."

"Now why would you do that?"

"He didn't deserve you. I mean—" Akane tries not to choke on her words and sound like a fool. "He called you a . That's all."

"I thought you didn't like me."

"Just—Just because I don't like you doesn't mean I won't stick up for you. Whatever. It's nothing." 

"I appreciate it."

Akane looks up and meets Yuuka's eyes—they're so tender and soft, and Akane wants to die, but she thinks it's in a good way.

Akane's never been in love before. It seems like now is the time.

Now everything Yuuka does is amazing to her—the care she organizes her bag with, her hair tucker behind her ears, how her hands move when she's cleaning off her glasses with the handkerchief she carries everywhere.

She still doesn't want to admit it.

Yuuka drags her pencil across the paper. "So the theory of relativity is like—" 

"Hey." Akanen interrupts. "What was that thing you said about like... memory and meaning?"

"Semantic encoding?"

"Yeah." Akane finds her fingers clutching the fabric of her skirt.

"Well... I suppose." Yuuka says, gentle smile and all. "It's like... you make up a little story that goes with the term you're trying to remember. Like with friction, you might say that-"

"No. I meant like..." Akane takes a sharp inhale. It feels suddenly quiet in her room. "Every time I get an answer right, maybe you give me one of these?"

With that, she leans in, and places a hand on Yuuka's shoulder. Yuuka almost starts to say something but it gets trapped, trapped inbetween where her and Akane's lips meet, slow and sweet.

When Akane pulls away, Yuuka's face is red.

It's the first time she's seen Yuuka blush.

"You know..." Yuuka catches her breath. "That's not quite how memory by meaning works, but I really like that idea." 

And this time she's the one leaning in for a kiss. 

Akane can't remember a time she felt so happy. 

2 weeks later, Yuuka and Akane sway slowly. They're holding eachother, perhaps a bit more close than any other couple, Yuuka looking magical in her white dress, and Akane in a suit—Kyoko's idea—and the music plays, thrumming softly over the speakers. The gym is filled with students, some in couplings, some not, and on the right wall hangs a banner: Winter Formal.

Yuuka says something, but Akane can't quite hear.

"What?" she asks, softly into Yuuka's ear.

"Kiss me." she repeats, louder.

Akane smirks, and takes a hand to Yuuka's face. 

"Can do."