The house looms into view, just a little further down the road. It was a big house, with 6 rooms inside. Hyesung knew, Eric picked this place. There was a lake near the house, and several areas where they could spread a mat to sit down to enjoy the view, which Hyesung knew was spectacular. They've been there before, he remembers, Eric used to take them there a few years back. Mostly with their family, and sometimes, with just the two of them. They would sit by the lake all afternoon, underneath a tree, with beer in hand, watching the flowers bloom by the field near them. Eric often likes to sit in silence, or talk about what they've gone through all these years, and when he gets drunk, he'd lay on the ground, talking about how grateful he is he met Hyesung in this lifetime or else would go ridiculous and start taking his clothes off.

Hyesung smiles at the memories.

"You okay?" Eric asks, tapping Hyesung's hand which was resting on his lap.

Hyesung turns to him and gives him a small smile, "Yes, thank you."

Eric smiles right back, "For?"

Hyesung shrugs a little, "For, what you did."

Giving him a grin, Eric says, "I told you, I meant it then, I mean it now."

Hyesung nods, "Thank you, Eric."

Patting Hyesung's shoulders, Eric nods, "You're welcome." he says, his voice sincere.

Hyesung pats Eric's leg and looks at the window, it was fully dark outside, save for the light which was coming from the moon and the street lamps lining the road towards the house on the hill. Eric makes a turn and presses on the accelator.

"Oh look, we're finally here." Eric says after a few moments. Hyesung gives him a smile, ignoring the tugging in his heart.

The car makes a full stop by the driveway of the house, Eric stops the engine and removes his seat belt, he turns towards Hyesung, "Can you help me with the stuff on the trunk?" he says giving Hyesung a smile.

Hyesung nods, takes off his seat belt and opens the car door, "Yes, sure, ofcourse."

Eric smiles and opens his car door. He walks over to the trunk, with Hyesung following on the other side. Raising the trunk carefully, Eric views the stuff they were carrying through the whole journey, he counts and strategizes on the best way to carry the stuff going one way.

As Hyesung leans in, the light from the doorway of the house opens and shuffling sounds along with male voices could be heard inside.

"I'll carry this," Eric says pointing at the backpack resting on the right side of the trunk, "You carry those." He continues, pointing at two small plastic bags on his left.

Hyesung nods, a sad smile playing on his lips. Eric gives him an understanding look and pats his cheeks as he lifts the backpack from the trunk.

"Don't feel sad anymore, I'm right here." Eric says seriously, his left hand adjusting the bag's weight towards his shoulders, "Don't forget."

Hyesung gives him a smile, "Yes."

Grinning, Eric presses both hands on Hyesung's cheeks and says, "I love you." then turns around to leave.

"Nado." Hyesung mutters under his breathe just as Eric makes a turn way from the back of the car.

Eric stops from his tracks and walks backwards. He stops by the side of the car, turning his head his face breaking into an expression of confusion, "What..." He breathes and looks at Hyesung's face, "What did you say?"

Hyesung looks down, a shy smile creeping on his lips. He breathes, Eric waits, then he looks up to look at Eric straight, "I love you, Eric." Hyesung says seriously.

Eric opens his mouth, but no sound comes out of it. He stares at Hyesung, unable to believe what he was hearing. He walks toward where Hyesung was standing, stops infront of him and whispers, "What."

Hyesung lifts his hand to touch his nape, sweat was dripping down his back, he tries to look back at Eric, who was almost gaping at him, "I know right?" Hyesung mutters, his voice shaking.

Eric stares at him, his expression bordering from disbelief to something Hyesung can't put...

"Stupid, I know." Hyesung says looking away from Eric. He breathes in and out, not knowing how to proceed. He looks at the direction of the lake, knowing very well he couldn't take a glimpse of it. He breathes again, looking at Eric this time, "I mean," he bites his lower lip, "What difference does it make?"

Eric holds onto the car and grips on the metal so tight, his knuckles turn white.

Hyesung doesn't notice this as he looks back at the lake, his breathing coming in successions out of nervousness, "I mean," Hyesung starts again, looking at Eric again, "What changes when I say it?"

Eric continuously stares at Hyesung, his mouth open, as if willing for words to come out. The front door finally opens, as Minwoo and Dongwan comes out from it, running towards their direction.

Minwoo stops and huffs, "Eric, she's been looking for you for hours now." He says, looking at Hyesung and giving Hyesung a small smile. Hyesung doesn't return it and looks at Eric's face. Minwoo scrunches his eyebrows at the lack of reaction.

Dongwan reaches Hyesung's side, "Yeah, Eric." He starts, and then stops as he sees the look on Eric's face. He turns to look at Hyesung's, and then turns towards Minwoo who shrugs at him.

Hyesung gives Eric a smile, bitterness was spread all over it, "It doesn't even matter--" He mutters.

Eric breathes, "It matters to me, Hyesung."

Minwoo and Dongwan looks at Eric's face, pain was written all over it. Minwoo opens his mouth in understanding, while Dongwan looks at Hyesung's face, see's his facial expression and then turns to look away.

Hyesung opens his mouth in surprise, but no words would come out from it.

"When?" Eric says, walking towards him gently, the backpack slipping from his shoulders.

Hyesung bows his head, "LA, 1995." He whispers.

Eric looks up, biting his lower lip. The bag slips from his hands and into the ground. He goes to look at Hyesung who still has his head bowed down.

"Why?" Eric whispers back, trying to control his voice.

Hyesung looks up, surprise, "Why?" He asks, his voice shaking.

Eric nods, "Yes, why?"

Hyesung bites his lower lip and raises his shoulders followed by his hands. He breathes and let his hands fall down on his sides. He looks at Eric seriously, "Because you're always there for me?" Eric stares at him, his jaws moving, "Because you never leave my side." Hyesung continues, "Because you always believed, because--"

Eric raises his hand to stop him from talking. Hyesung stops and looks at him. Eric's chuckles, but his eyebrows meet at the center of his forehead, "Why now, Hyesung?"

Hyesung stares at him, a tear falls down on Eric's cheeks.

"Why JUST now?" Eric says, this time in a louder voice which shook a little.

Hyesung opens his mouth, a tear escapes his eye, falling freely on his cheek, "Eric, I--"

Eric's eyebrows quiver on his forehead, more tears fall down his cheek, "Why did you wait?"

Another tear falls down on Hyesung's cheek, Dongwan and Minwoo look away.

"WHY?!" Eric screams.

"Baby? Is that you?" Hyemi's voice sounded from inside the house.

Minwoo looks up and walks toward Eric's spot, reaching out he holds unto Eric's arm, "Eric, we have to go." He says softly, thugging on Eric's arm gently.

Eric turns towards Minwoo and yanks his arm away from him, "WAIT!" he bellows.

Dongwan walks forward, "Eric." He says his voice full of concern.

Eric turns to Dongwan too and screams, "WAIT!"

Several drops of water takes their attention as it fell down on their heads, into the ground.

Minwoo looks up.

It is raining.

Eric turns back toward Hyesung, not minding the rain a bit, "WHY, HYESUNG! WHY!" He says shouting, tears continuously poured down his cheeks in an angry waterfall, faster than the rain that was falling around them.

Hyesung closes his eyes, shakes his head and opens them, "BECAUSE I WASN'T BRAVE ENOUGH!" He bellows towards Eric. Eric stares at him, his mouth wide open, "I was afraid that you wouldn't feel the same way!" Hyesung says brokenly, "And I'm right, right?" He continues, raising his hand towards the house, "I'm just your bestfriend." Hyesung looks down on the ground, letting his hand fall, "I'm just your bestfriend, Eric."

A chuckle excapes Eric's throat, tears streamed down his cheeks, his face screwed in an expression of hurt, "You're the love of my life."

Hyesung looks up suddenly, unable to believe his ears.

"But--I thought--" Hyesung says, trying to find the words.

Eric gave him a sad smile, "I made you my bestfriend because I thought that's all I'll ever be to you." Hyesung's face twists in pain, "And it was okay, at least, I thought." Eric bites his lower lip, "I thought, well, I will never lose you that way." He shrugs, "Because I wanted to keep you in my life." Hyesung raises his hand towards his chest, crumpling his pullover, "As close as I can," Eric nods, pursing his lips, "If only through that, you're mine." He finishes, tilting his head, tears spilling on his cheeks endlessly.

"Eric..." Hyesung says, his hand gripping his pullover tightly, tears falling down on his lips as well as rain.

Eric purses his lips, "You are my person, Hyesung." He says brokenly.

Hyesung closes his eyes, rain was drenching his pullover, but he couldn't care less. His heart was in pain, more than ever now than he ever felt in his life. He breathes heavily, opens his eyes and looks at Eric's pained expression, knowing and hurting that he was the one who caused it, "I'm sorry for not being brave enough for you." Eric raises his hand towards his head, holding onto his hair, "For us." Hyesung says pain gripping his voice.

"AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!" Eric screams as he punches the car trunk in anger. He punches it over and over and over and over again, as if willing for the physical pain to take over, if only to replace the pain he was feeling on his chest.

Minwoo looks at both of his friends not knowing what to do. He takes a glance at Dongwan who's looking away, and he knows, he knows that he was in pain too...

Hyesung sniffs and looks away, "Eric..."

Eric continuously screams into the night, punching and kicking whatever part of the car he could reach. He looks up and shouts, "WHY?! PLEASE! WHY?!"

Minwoo walks forward to stop Eric but he moves toward Hyesung. Hyesung looks at him as he holds onto Hyesung's shoulders and rests his forehead on Hyesung's forehead.

Rain spilled all around them, it felt like, the heavens were crying along...

Eric closes his eyes, gripping Hyesung's shoulders, "I wish time can stop." He starts in a whisper, "if only for today."

Hyesung nods and closes his eyes, as if willing for time to stop by doing so.

"If only right now." Eric continues whispering, "So for a moment, I can bask in the happiness of knowing..." He gulps, "Knowing that you love me too."

Hyesung bites his lower lip, nods and holds onto Eric's hands on his shoulders. Unable to say anything, his heart shattering inside his chest.

"You know," Eric began again, sniffing, his voice shaking, "I have waited all my life to hear it." He sniffs again, "I hoped and hoped and hoped that one day..." He breathes, "I just didn't think that one day would be today."

Hyesung looks up, "I'm sorry, Eric."

Eric shakes his head, "No, my love." Eric says as he grips Hyesung's hand, "I will not hear that from you right now."

Hyesung nods.

Eric moves his face away from Hyesung's; Hhe looks at the face of the man he loves, reflecting for the first time ever, the same emotion that was always in his eyes. He reaches out for Hyesung's face, as Hyesung lifts both hands to hold unto Eric's arms. He gives Eric a sad smile, which he returns. Tilting his head on the side, Eric lifts his hand to touch Hyesung's face, traces the curves, the smooth surface; his eyes, his nose, his mouth, as if memorizing despite already knowing. Tears fell down on Hyesung's face; a river of pain. Turning his head, Hyesung plants a kiss on Eric's palm, closing his eyes. Eric looks at him, feeling his heart breaking. Slowly, he moves forward, giving Hyesung a kiss on the forehead, his lips quivering as more tears fell from his eyes, then gently he moves to kiss his eyes and then his nose. With every kiss he too, could feel his heart shattering.

"I love you, Jung Pil Kyo." Eric says, his voice shaking.

Hyesung smiles and looks at him, eyes leaking with tears, "And I you, Mun Jung Hyuk."

Eric nods as more tears came. Closing his eyes, he moves forward to give Hyesung a kiss, this time on his lips.

The world seem to stop for a moment. Rain floated in the air. Everything else disappears.

Hyesung grips his arms as he returns his kiss.

"Eric? Baby? Are you there?" Hyemi called out from the house.

Eric & Hyesung break away from each other.

'Yes, I'm here. I'll be there in a minute." Eric calls out, his voice steady.

Hyesung nodded, "Go." He says letting go of Eric's arm.

Eric gives him a sad smile, touches his cheeks one more time and says, "I love you."

Hyesung smiles, "I love you too."

Nodding his head, Eric picks up the bag he left on the ground, now drenched in rain. He turns to Minwoo who was looking at the both of them, his eyes also leaking with tears, then to Dongwan who's looking at the heavens, his eyes closed. Eric breathes in an out, deeply, trying to keep his tears at bay, he walks towards the house, slightly shaking. Andy stands by the door, waiting for him, his eyes knowing. Eric gives him a smile, a tear escapes his eye, he looks up, trying to hide his pain. Andy gives him a smile and grips his shoulders, a sign of understanding.

"Take Hyesung home. Bring Jin with you." Eric says seriously.

Andy nods and walks towards the night, not minding the rain falling.

Eric takes a small turn, looking back. Minwoo and Dongwan were now walking towards him, carrying the stuff that Hyesung was suppose to carry. Looking at his car, he could see Hyesung's silhouette, sitting on the front seat, as if knowing Andy will take him home.

Eric heart yearns for him.

But he knows what he must do.

Andy gives him a small wave as both Minwoo and Dongwan reaches the house. Junjin comes out of the house running towards the car and takes the driver's seat, nodding towards him, Andy takes the seat on the back.

Dongwan enters the house without a word, while Minwoo stays by the door, standing beside Eric, looking at the car which was now backing out of the driveway.

Hyesung looks at both Eric and Minwoo standing by the doorway and places his right hand towards his heart.

So this is what heartbreak feels like.

It's not just about not being able to express your love.

Or not being loved in return.

It's also being reciprocated but knowing that it cannot be.

A tear falls down on Hyesung's cheeks as Eric raises his hand and waves them goodbye.

So this is what it means to be broken.

So this is what it feels like to die, slowly from the inside.

Hyesung bites his lower lip, raises his hand and waves back.

"Goodbye, Eric." Hyesung mutters as the car turns and the house disappears from their view.

Goodbye, love.