The loud ringing of my alarm woke me from my slumber and welcomed me with a headache. Going to school with a fever was tough so taking a nap seemed like a good answer… not. With a sigh, I pulled myself from the comfort of my bed and went to get ready but was suddenly hit with a rush of dizziness. I fell back onto my bed and held my head in my hands. Once the feeling of disorientation left my body I proceeded to get ready once again. I haven’t seen my boyfriend in 2 months because he was on tour so now that he is around Seoul again, I won’t miss my chance to see him again… I miss him. I’m not letting a little fever stop me. Grabbing what little food was left, I made a quick meal. With all the assignments and work for the past week, there wasn’t time for me to go grocery shopping or eat most of the time or even sleep. Feeling slightly better after eating, I grabbed my purse and headed out.

 

     After leaving my apartment, I hailed a cab to get to the venue. Sitting in the cab, a deep sigh escaped my lips as I could feel the sickness creep over my body. This will be a long night… But at least I can rest in the waiting room before and after the concert so it won’t be too bad. You can make it through the night. Once at the venue, I flashed my staff ID I received from their manager and entered the backstage area. I quickly went to the dressing room and knocked before entering. Upon seeing him, my face lit up with an uncontrollable smile but the tense atmosphere cut through me and my smile faltered. All the boys avoided making eye contact and their usual rowdiness was silence once my foot entered the room. Turning to my boyfriend sitting by the counter to ask what was wrong, something in me told me this tension was mainly from him.

 

“Hey Binnie, why is everyone so tense?” He ignored me as his back still faced me and he had no intention of turning around.

 

“Moonbin?” Still no response.

 

“Okay, did I do something wrong? Why am I being ignored?” Slight irritation filled me at his actions. We finally get to see each other and this happens? At this moment, my headache decided to come back stronger, to the point my hand had to grab the counter to stabilize myself.

 

“I don’t know what I’m supposed to do if I don’t know what’s going on. You were fine when we talked a few days ago. What is going on?” I spoke calmly as my headache calmed down a bit.

 

     He continued to give me the cold shoulder and just tossed his phone on the counter behind him with a picture opened on the screen. Picking it up, it was a photo of me and Dongguk exiting the office. One photo, in particular, was of us hugging. All of these photos were taken around 3 am. A sharp pain stabbed my chest as my eyes stared at him in disbelief. He thinks I cheated on him… I placed his phone back on the counter and looked at his back once again. Betrayal, anger, and so many more emotions were all balled together into an unpleasant knot in my stomach. With the ringing in my ears from the headache and the overall ty feeling that engulfed my body because of my fever, my patience wasn’t at its best this evening.

 

“That’s Somi’s boyfriend, soon to be fiancé. He was helping me with my anniversary surprise in return for my help in planning his proposal. We stayed that late because he wanted to perfect the last of his proposal because he’s popping the question in a week. I don’t see why my boyfriend didn’t trust me and jumped to conclusions. If you think I’m lying I’ll leave his number. I don’t want to ruin the vibe before the concert so I’ll just go home for tonight. Good luck with the concert, I know you guys will do well.” I spoke swiftly and calmly, making sure he could hear the venom in my voice although I truly do wish them good luck.

 

     Slamming the messily scrawled phone number, that was written as I spoke on the counter, I my heel. Some of the boys finally looked at me as I was explaining and guilt washed over their expressions but I continued to exit the room. The murmurs filled the room once I was in the hallway and I finally let the tears prick my eyes. My headache began to be unbearable and I felt a dizzy spell coming but I continued to press forward through the halls to the exit. Once I was out and hailed a cab I knew that this wasn’t just a little fever.

 

“Please take me to the nearest hospital,” I said as the pain in my head continued.

 

     On the way there my thoughts ran rampant. We’ve been dating for nearly a year already… I would think he would have a little more faith in me. I hope this won’t throw off the boys, they’ve worked too hard for this. Pulling myself from my thoughts, my attention averted to the window. Watching the outside world pass by, the street lights began to blur together as my mind slowly began to slip into the comfort of sleep. When I opened my eyes again I was in a hospital bed. I tried to sit up but was pushed back down by someone. Getting a closer look at him, it turned out to be one of Moonbin’s managers.

 

“Dahye-ssi please stay put. You are running an incredibly high fever along with sleep deprivation and malnutrition.”

 

“What happened?”

 

“You fainted in the back of the cab on the way to the hospital. The cab driver freaked out and brought you to the ER. He went through your bag to find your contact information and called the first number he saw, which was Moonbin’s number. I answered the phone and came right away.”

 

“Oh… I’m sorry you should be with Moonbin right now. The concert is going on and you’re busy as is. Now that I’m up I can deal with everything, you can go back,” I rambled, embarrassed at how things turned out.

 

“No, it’s fine. The concert is about to end and Moonbin will be heading over with the rest of the boys,” He said as he checked his phone.

 

“Wait… Moonbin knows?” I groaned as he nodded his head.

 

“Yes now please stay still. I’ll bring the doctor.”

 

     The doctor lectured me about my malnutrition and sleep deprivation and scolded me for going out with a fever and the other two symptoms. Once the doctor left, my body relaxed but tension seized it once again as a familiar figure appeared at the entrance once a few minutes later. Still upset from the earlier argument, my head turned away from him as my eyes watched his reflection on the window. The two younger boys could be heard fussing in the hallway as Jinjin hushed them. Only Moonbin and I were left in the room as their manager left alongside the doctor to fill out some paperwork. Watching his figure approach, he carefully reached for my hand and I could feel the slight tremble in his. My angry facade broke a bit upon seeing his shaken up reflection. Gingerly, I turned to look at him and more of the facade broke. Although he had just finished a concert, there was no trace of the after show energy or smiles. Worry took over his features as his hair was disheveled, his jacket had fallen off one shoulder but he made no move to readjust it, his breath was heavy as if he had run all the way here and his eyes scanned my whole body to ensure that I was okay.

 

“Dahye I’m so sorry that I didn’t believe you. We haven’t seen each other in so long and I thought that you would prefer someone who could actually be around more often, I didn’t have confidence that I could be a good boyfriend to you and it got worse when we couldn’t see each other so when I saw those pictures-” His mouth spilled his words like a broken dam and I had to use my free hand to stop him from talking. I never could stay mad at him.

 

“Moonbin look at me,” The first time this night he finally looked me in the eye and I removed my hand.

 

“I know what I signed up for when I started dating you. I know you can’t be around all the time and we can’t go out much but I don’t care. You have been an amazing boyfriend regardless of all that. It hurt that you doubted my feelings for you but that doesn’t mean I love you any less.” His eyes glossed over a bit and a smile grew on his face as he wrapped his arms around me.

 

“I’m sorry for doubting you if it means anything I didn’t call the number. I know you and after getting over my initial fear I saw how much of a jerk I was. I love you.”

 

“I love you too.”

 

“Now what is this about you not eating or sleeping AND having a fever?” Even though he was genuinely concerned I couldn’t help but smile at him.

 

     As if the other boys were eavesdropping, which they most likely were, they decided to finally burst into the room with Rocky and Sanha rushing to my side and asking a million questions a minute. A soft chuckle left my lips as I reassured everyone I was okay. Once I did, all the boys began to nag and scold me for taking better care of myself, especially Moonbin.

 

“I love you guys.” Having grown close to everyone over the past year, I realized just how much I’ve grown attached to the rest of ASTRO.

 

“We love you too but you’re still in trouble. How could you not eat properly?! Being Moonbin’s girlfriend I would think you would eat well,” Eunwoo teased.

 

“Hey!” Moonbin pouted while everyone else laughed.

 

Even though this wasn’t the ideal situation, I couldn’t ask for anything better.