KUANLIN. Leave and Never Look Back
All I Wanna Do! (Wanna One High School)Kuanlin didn’t know much about Park Woojin, apart from the fact that he was Jihoon’s roommate, and was a Junior in Class A from the Idol Track.
But one thing he did know was that Park Woojin was an amazing dancer. Probably one of the best he had ever seen, even though Jihoon’s cover of EXO's 'Monster' was still his favourite. He stared in amazement as Woojin took over the practice room floor where they had been for the past two hours, dancing to BTS’s ‘Blood Sweat and Tears’, each movement sharp, precise, and absolutely captivating to watch.
“He’s amazing.” Kuanlin said, turning to Jihoon beside him. He was watching Woojin too, but he kind of looked a bit annoyed for some reason.
“Yeah,” Jihoon said. “Too much for his own good. Ugh, at this rate I won’t be able to catch up.”
“Don’t worry, hyung, you’re still my favourite,” Kuanlin teased, which made Jihoon blush and look away. Kuanlin had no idea why he reacted that way, but he thought it was kind of cute, anyway. Everything about Jihoon was kind of cute. If he was being honest, Kuanlin had decided the moment Jihoon almost cursed at him yesterday that teasing him would probably become his newest favorite hobby. Jihoon’s reactions were kind of priceless.
“You’re really cute, hyung,” Kuanlin thought out loud. “I prefer that expression over the scowl you have on whenever Woojin-hyung dances.”
“What’s this about a scowl?” Woojin said. Apparently the song had finished, and Kuanlin had missed it. Darn, he liked how the choreography ended too, so he was a little bummed about that. It was Jihoon’s fault for being too distracting.
“Is it my turn to dance yet?” Jihoon asked. “I knew I shouldn’t have told you we were here. You’ve cut into my practice time way too much.”
“What are you on about?” Woojin asked in return, retrieving a towel from his backpack and wiping his sweat away with it. “You’ve practiced your piece twelve times already. I only practiced mine for eleven.”
“Yeah and if you weren’t here, my count would be at twenty-four.”
“Stop acting like you didn’t practice over a hundred times yesterday.” Woojin said. “Aren’t you getting a little tired of it? Eleven times more hardly matters, it isn’t like the song is going to magically speed up in beat or change in lyrics.”
Jihoon simply glared at him. “Well stop acting like you need the practice. You’re in A, and there’s no chance you’ll get demoted to B.”
Woojin smirked in satisfaction. “Sounds like a compliment to me.”
Jihoon buried his face in the palm of his left hand. “Darn it. I slipped.”
As they bickered, Kuanlin watched them with a certain curiosity. He wondered how this sort of dynamic formed between them, because he had never seen anything like it before. They seemed like the type to randomly break into a three-hour-long shouting match over whether or not the chicken came before the egg.
But then again, they were roommates, so they probably secretly got along. As Kuanlin observed them silently, he felt a small pang of envy. He didn’t have anyone like that. All of his friends were back in Taiwan, and even then he had been too focused on basketball and his studies to maintain his friendships with a lot of people.
At that moment, Jihoon’s phone started ringing, interrupting Kuanlin’s thoughts. Jihoon fished it out of his pocket.
“It’s Jinyoung,” he said. Kuanlin had no idea whether the look on his face was of excitement or panic. It could well have been both. Jihoon pressed the answer button hurriedly, bringing the phone to his ear. “Hey Jinyoung! I’m sorry I wasn’t able to—“ he stopped, and the expression on his face changed visibly to worry. It worried Kuanlin as well. What was wrong?
“I’m really sorry,” Jihoon continued. “I was too tired, and I forgot to recharge. I really meant to tell you. I even sent you a text as soon as I woke up, but I couldn’t come to meet you anymore because Kuanlin and I had to…” his voice faltered. “Hello? Jinyoung? Are you still there? Hey!”
“Trouble in paradise?” Woojin asked, as Jihoon slowly brought the phone down from his ear to his lap, staring at the screen in disbelief.
“I don’t believe this. He hung up on me!”
So this was what Jihoon looked like when he was angry. He thought it was kinda scary…
…but cute. How was that even possible?
Kuanlin had no idea how to comfort Jihoon at a time like this, but he still wanted to wipe the look of distress off of his face anyway. So he did the only thing he could think of to make Jihoon feel marginally better. He fished into his sweatshirt pocket, and from it offered to Jihoon the Lotte Chocolate Pie he had been saving. “Want some?”
Jihoon looked up at him in confusion, then at the snack in longing. After a while he decided against it. “No thanks, I’m not hung—“
Jihoon’s stomach grumbled.
Kuanlin suppressed the urge to laugh. Woojin laughed out loud, pointing at Jihoon’s belly mockingly.
“Well, well, it seems stomachs speak louder than words.”
Jihoon cast a murderous glare in Woojin’s direction. Kuanlin sighed, then took Jihoon’s hand, aware of how Jihoon bristled in surprise at the contact. He placed the snack onto Jihoon’s palm.
“You can have it, hyung,” he said, patting Jihoon’s head affectionately. “You must be really tired from practice. I’m sorry I can’t do much else for you.”
There it was again, that blush. Somehow, being able to entice that sort of reaction out of Jihoon was really satisfying. He watched as Jihoon debated in his head whether or not to take the snack and eat it, or throw it at Woojin’s face. Jihoon took the snack after a long moment. “Thanks. At least one of you is being civil about this.”
“So why is Jinyoung mad at you again?” Woojin asked, ignoring Jihoon’s underhanded comment.
“No idea, to be honest,” Jihoon said, ripping the plastic of the chocolate pie, and biting into half of it in one go. “It’s not like I didn’t have a reason why I couldn’t contact him.”
As he talked, Kuanlin wondered what sort of relationship Jihoon had with Jinyoung. He’d heard they were best friends, so did that mean he was even closer to Jihoon than Woojin was? But then again, it was probably none of his business. He cast a sideways glance in Jihoon’s direction, spotting the pie crumbs at the edges of his lips. Without a second thought, he reached out and wiped them off.
Jihoon immediately moved away in surprise. “What are you doing?”
“You had some food on there,” he said. He watched as Jihoon’s cheeks started turning into a bright pink color unlike anything he had ever seen. “Are you okay, hyung? You’re looking kind of red.” Kuanlin reached for him again, this time to touch his forehead with the back of his hand. He leaned in closer to get a better look at Jihoon’s complexion. “Are you getting sick?”
Jihoon stared at him for a few seconds, and then seeming to realize something, immediately swatted Kuanlin’s hand away.
“No, I just… I’ll just go and find Jinyoung for a sec.” Without another word, Jihoon stood up and headed towards the door to leave. Once he had gone, Kuanlin was left with an empty sort of feeling, as if he had just lost a game he didn’t know he was playing. Did he overdo it? Kuanlin liked to tease Jihoon to get a reaction out of him, but just then he was actually genuinely worried.
“I knew something was going on between the two of you.” Woojin said out of nowhere, startling Kuanlin. He had somehow forgotten Woojin was still in the room, and he felt his face heat up at the thought that he had done something so embarrassing in front of him.
“If I were you,” Woojin began. “Don’t you ever become anything like your Jihoon-hyung.”
“Why? What’s wrong with Jihoon-hyung? I think he’s actually quite nice.”
“He’s too easily distracted by things that should be unimportant for him at this stage in life.”
“Like?”
“Like boys, for example.”
“Boys.”
“Yes. Especially the mysterious, brooding, and pretty-looking ones. You know who I’m talking about.”
Kuanlin ran through the mental list in his head of who might be described as mysterious, brooding, and pretty-looking (though he had no idea what ‘brooding’ meant. His Korean just wasn’t advanced enough).
“You mean boys like Jinyoung-hyung,” he finally concluded.
Woojin simply stared at him for a long moment before sighing in what seemed like resignation. “Okay, yes, let’s just say it’s Jinyoung.”
As Kuanlin nodded in agreement, Woojin began patting Kuanlin’s shoulder slowly. “Your naïveté is kind of refreshing. Makes it easier for me to get away with accidentally saying something I shouldn't.”
Kuanlin had no idea what naïveté meant either, but he would definitely store it into one of his mental folders for him to Google translate from Korean later on. It was probably a compliment anyway. And it made sense. Jinyoung and Jihoon had known each other for a long time, so it would be no surprise if Jihoon got distracted by him from time to time. Or maybe just by his head, because it was disturbingly almost just the size of his fist.
“You’re not the same, are you?” Woojin asked, his eyes narrowing in suspicion. “You don’t get distracted by guys either?”
The only thing distracting Kuanlin nowadays was his upcoming promotion exam performance, which he had decided to take after all, despite it not being required of a transferee. But that was less something to be distracted about than the very thing he shouldn’t be distracted from. But apart from Jihoon, he didn’t think much about boys really. He guessed nothing was particularly wrong. He shook his head. “Dunno. I think I’m pretty much still into girls.”
But he had never really been into anyone, period. He teased girls before, but it was just to get a reaction from them out of curiosity. He guessed he was still at that stage in his life where he was trying to understand how girls really worked, and convince himself they weren’t actually aliens from a different planet because they kinda spoke in a weird language that was even harder to decipher than Korean. He really liked teasing them though, because their exaggerated reactions were kind of hilarious.
“So you’ve had a girlfriend before.” Woojin asked, startling Kuanlin a second time. Why was he suddenly on the hot seat?
“No.” He replied. Woojin’s eyes narrowed. Kuanlin wondered what he should say next. “But uhh… I guess I kinda want one.”
“Shh,” Woojin said abruptly, cupping his ear with his left hand and bringing his right index finger to Kuanlin’s mouth as if to gesture for him to keep quiet. “Did… did you hear that Kuanlin-ah?”
Kuanlin did not, in fact, hear that. “Hear what?” he asked, confused.
Woojin leaned in closer to the source of the sound, wherever the heck it was. “I think… that’s the sound of a million girls collectively sighing in relief at the fact that they still have the chance to capture your heart.” He looked at Kuanlin with a smug look on his face.
Kuanlin wasn’t sure whether to pretend he found it funny, or just inwardly pity his Woojin-hyung for thinking that his remark was even remotely deserving of a reaction. “There, there, hyung,” he said, patting Woojin gently on the back, deciding to comfort him instead. “I’m so sorry you’ve got no jams.”
Woojin feigned a look of annoyance. “I swear you’re starting to sound and look like Jihoon more and more each day.”
“Thanks,” Kuanlin said. “I think Jihoon-hyung is really handsome.”
Woojin simply nodded his head absently. A few moments later a look of horror dawned on his face. “Wait. You think he’s handsome? What is this? Do you like him? Are you secretly dating? Or perhaps you’re in love with him and he’s in love with you but neither of you know it? Are you trying to recruit me as your wingman so you can use me as a messenger to send mushy love letters back and forth to each other? And then expect to me to watch you giggle stupidly at them while I wait for your response? Because let me just clarify that I absolutely refuse.”
Kuanlin could only stare at Woojin with his mouth agape. “Hyung,” he said. “I don’t know what you’re getting so worked up about, I literally just breathed. I never said anything about a love letter. Besides, I’m not shallow enough to like someone just because they’re handsome. ”
“Ya sure about that?”
“See, I don’t even like you all that much just yet.”
“What is that supposed to mean?” Woojin demanded.
“It means you’re really handsome, but I need to get to know you better first before I decide if you’re truly likeable.”
“WHAT DO YOU MEAN I’M NOT TRULY LIKE—wait. You think I’m handsome?”
Kuanlin grinned at him, gums on full display. He randomly sent Woojin a finger heart for maximum effect.
“Wow,” Woojin said. “I’m amazed. Your judgment of visuals is superb. Your parents raised you well.”
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