“How do I say?

How do I show you what I’m feeling?

Why am I scared?

Why can’t I tell what the deal is?”

‘Kwon Jiyong, I’m in love with you.’

No. I don’t have enough guts to say that to his face.

So, how can I say it?

I can’t.

So, Should I just keep it to myself?

Heck. Why do I even like him? I guess it’s just this feeling I have whenever I’m around him; felling like I should be the pencil to his paper. No. That’s too cheesy.

I know that he’ll always be there.

Whenever I’m sad, he’ll be the shoulder I cry on.

Whenever I need company, he’ll make me laugh like there’s no tomorrow.

Whenever I’m happy, he’ll be the cause of it.

His enticing voice will be the music blasting in my ear phones.

His earnest eyes will reflect mine.

His electrifying touch will allow me to love him even more.

I feel like he’s the perfect fit. Yeah.

We balance each other out.

Oh well. I now know one thing for sure.

I, Sandara Park, will tell Kwon Jiyong I love him… somehow.

--

After opening my apartment door, a cd that was leaning against the door fell on my shoe.  It read, ‘To Kwon jiyong.’ Out of curiosity, I opened the case. All it had was a cd; no mention of who this is from, or what it is.

I guess I’ll just pop it in the cd player in my car on my way to work.

The cd player engulfed the cd and there. The sound came out.

Hey Jiyong. It’s me, Dara.

Oh. It was from Dara. Why did she send me a cd though?

You love cd’s right? Whenever I come by to your house, it’s always filed with cd’s. So, I’ve decided to tell you this on a cd. I don’t have much courage to tell you it in person. I’m scared of seeing your expression if you reject me.

Reject her? Is this some sort of confession? Well, I hope it is. I’ve loved her for quite some time now. Though, I didn’t have the guts to say it since she’s against best friends dating. She told me that once, when I was about to confess to her while carpooling to work. What a let-down, right?

Well, I’ll just come right out and say it. I love you

Wait. What? Did I hear that right? No. I’m imagining things. Rewind.

I love you.

She said she loves me. I’m not hearing things.

I’ve loved you for quite a while now.

Since you’re one of my best friends, I didn’t want to destroy our friendship. The confession I just made right now will either destroy our friendship or take it to the next level. You decide.

Dara... Haven’t you seen the way I look at you? The way I treat you is different from all the other girls. You’re special.

I’m ready for whichever one you decided on in the end. I’m pretty sure you’ve already decided, right?

Yes. I have.

Well, if you haven’t, listen to the rest. Maybe it will help you decide. Though, if you already know what you’re going to say to me, still listen. Please.

I’ll always listen to you. When I hear your voice, it’s like the angels have come down. It’s like angelic harps serenading me. I love your voice. I love your stories.

You’re probably wondering when I noticed that I love you.

Well, I’ll tell you.

Do you remember when we first met?

I remember. How could I not? I could feel the sparks that romantic movies always talk about. I had to have you in life.

It was my first week in Korea after moving from the Philippines. My head was pretty much stuck to the map. I was just blindly going around on the streets of Seoul. While I was walking, I didn’t notice you. You didn’t notice me either since you were too busy looking at something your phone or drinking your coffee. I don’t remember which since well, I still had the map wrapped around my head.

I remember. I was drinking coffee.

In the end, we collided against each other. We both fell. Your coffee spilled. It was a good thing that there wasn’t much left of it or else my shirt would’ve been stained even more. You offered to take me to your house to change into cleaner clothes even though I was a stranger. I went to your house even though you were a stranger. Maybe, by then, I knew that I had to have you in my life? Who knows? Maybe I already started falling for you then?

I started to hear her chuckle. What was so funny about that?

Excuse my lame pun.

I joined in her laugh. Pun excused.

Coincidentally, we were both working in the same place. In my mind, I was thanking the heavens since I was praying to see you again.

I thanked the heavens too.

We both pointed to each other at the same time and said,” You! You’re the one that…” We laughed. I found that your laugh was mesmerizing. Your eyes were glistening in the light. You were quite handsome then.

Who says handsome nowadays? Well, I don’t mind being called handsome. It feels nice to be called that. More people should start using it. Or maybe it’s just the fact that it’s Dara who’s calling me handsome? Is that why it feels so nice?

My crush for you started growing and our friendship started.

We kept on talking. We kept on hanging out. Before I realized it, I was already accustomed to having you near me. You became my best friend. But I said to myself, “I can’t fall for Jiyong. I can’t risk this friendship.” For a while, I did what I said.

I let out a small chuckle. I did the same thing.

Do you remember that time during summer when we carpooled to work together and I brought up the topic of best friends dating? This was the first time we talked about it. Do you remember what you said? “Best friends can’t date. For example, if you and I dated, our relationship would sink like the titanic. Our friendship would never be the same anymore. So, best friends can’t date.” That hurt but I played it off like I agreed with you. “Yeah. I know right? If we were together, we’d become awkward with each other…” And that was the end of that topic. If you had said, “Yes. Best friends can date.” I would’ve forgotten what I said right then and there and confess to you. But you didn’t. So, I didn’t think of loving you anymore.

I said it first? Oh yeah. I did. I was scared then. I kept on thinking to myself that we shouldn’t date because we were best friends. If we date, it’ll ruin our friendship. But when she agreed with me, it hurt. It hurt so much. Guess I wasn’t the only one hurting.

Now you’re probably confused. At the beginning I said I love you and now I’m saying that I don’t. Girls are confusing.

True. Girls are confusing.

Even I don’t understand girls and I’m a girl myself. Anyway, after that incident, we still continued being best friends.  It wasn’t awkward or anything. It was normal. But you still kept on growing on me even though I told it to stop countless times.

Do you remember Sohee?

Of course I did. She was too clingy to me.

The one that was so obsessed with you. I wasn’t jealous that she kept on coming near you however.  You got fed up with her so you told her you had a girlfriend already.

I hoped that you’d become my girlfriend.

She asked who it was. You said it was the person standing beside you. Who was that person? Oh yeah. Me.

I loved you then. Heck. I still do.

She told you to prove it. So you did. You kissed me. It wasn’t just a simple peck. It was full on, kissing like there’s no tomorrow. When you did that, my heart kept beating like there’s no tomorrow as well.

I don’t know why I did that. I was just planning on a simple peck, but once my lips landed on yours, I couldn’t get enough of you. I still can’t. I need you with me, Dara.

When I looked at Sohee’s disbelief expression, I realized something. I wasn’t jealous of her, not because I didn’t love you, but because I knew I was more special to you than her. Am I right?

Yes. You’re right.

So, from then on, I started to just love you without regret. And I’ve decided to tell you it. I love you so much, Kwon Jiyong.

And that was the end of the cd.

I love you too Dara.

I’m close to the company.

That means I’m closer to you.

Dara,

Be my girlfriend.

Be my wife.

Be my everything.

--

And that's the end :D Tell me what you tihnk of it please (: