she hovers over the door looking at her son who kept hugging a framed picture sobbing like a child "son.." she starts tearing up herself yet she knows she can not help him. he won't listen, he'll blame her like he blamed the world and society so she deemed it as useless to try but his wailing kept going on for days, food tasted like ash in his mouth, water tasted like acid burning him in his mouth, his life had no goal no purpose anymore, nothing to live for...                                           

taekwoon wasn't this melancholic and miserable before, this change was casted by how the world treated him. he just fell in love for a man. that was all..but by the society's saying it was something unlogical and can not be. his feelings were treated as if it was a curse. he was shown no tolerance resulting in him becoming a man that hated everything around him.. he hated the world and the prejudice that surrounded it's people. but he especially hated how life took what was precious to him..what he actually been taking all the hate for...

his mother had enough she couldn't handle a son who cried for days and nights for no end "please stop this, it's been months!.." she had to get him to see reality and make him start fresh ..in an enviroment where he could live and marry and actually have a respectable life.

"you need to forget him! " she shouted a bit irritated as she widely opened the door coming into full view. she knew it will be useless. she knew she shouldn't have brought it up but in her mind it was about time she did.

"shut up.. " he whispers after a moment of silence but she didnt hear him, rather she wouldn't even tried to hear him. she was always the first opposer who was against him in love with a man.

"look at what have you become!! weeping for the dead, all because of that boy!" 

"SHUT UP!" he yells grabbing a book and throwing it in her direction. but it missed it's target.

she became frightened as she backed away slowly tearing up at the fact that she now had no control or power over her son. she closed the room's door leaving the crying mess to resume his mourning.                                                                                                                                                                                  

he couldn't held back tears at the mentions of his lover, the man he once loved and cared for. with it he remembered how life has been too unfair to them. people looked down upon them for the fact that they were in a same relationship. it was bad enough because of all the eyes, stares, whispers they got, even the ones who were close to them had turned their back on them. so much for loyalty he thought..

leaving the house had became a torture even to do simple acts like buying groceries. he tried to ignore it at first but it was too much.. people looked at them as if they were freaks, unnatural beings making the idea of turning a blind eye on them seemed of no use..

nonetheless, they lived a ..moderate life, they were warm in each other's embrace waking up and sleeping and eating together.. they kept each other's company.. yet life was too cruel.. his lover was plagued with an uncureable diseases causing him to struggle for years.., year after year he started losing hair, then the ablitity to move ,he couldn't even move most of his limbs anymore.. his lover had lost all hope but he didn't. he started begging doctors to help treat his condition but to no avail. however, when he finally found someone who'd take them under his wing, life played it's troll..taking his loved one away..

he remembers that day as if it was yesterday, he remembers it all... how his lover wonshik sat on his bed, face pale almost like a ghost, chapped lips and dark circles under his eyes.. he changed so much from how taekwoon once remembered him to be ..as if he grew twenty years older.

taekwoon was sobbing like he never did before eyes burning with flaming tears, his mind was lost. he didn't know what to do and what he should think of.. he couldnt stop shaking as his hands tried to reach for his almost dying lover, he held his lover's hands into his own placing them to his heart, he sobbed yelling his name tears washing down his face like a waterfall, he feared that this day will come. but he didnt expected it to come so soon.. he had so much he wanted and needed to say yet he couldn't find anything to say..

"don't worry, love " wonshik mutters feeling his cheeks being cupped by the other's soft and warm hands.

"nonono i wont lose you no! dont leave me please!" he sobs feeling his heart breaking to pieces. feeling helpless. he couldn't do anything. not like there were much to do anyways..

" its okay..my time has come.." he utters, voice barely above a whisper.

"nono please don't leave me please i'll give you everything! even my heart! please please!" tears had filled his eyes to the extent of it blurring his vision, but both knew that he won't live through this...

"please live..live happy..and free..please do it ..for me." he pleads hoping that the other will at least follow his last wish "i love you, i will always do..but please forget me..and live on..please." his pleas once again echoed in taekwoon's ears, the latter denying what is about to come upon his lover. 

he takes his shaking hands moving them to cup taekwoon's cheeks, he wipes his tears using his thump as he smiles the most broad smile he could muster in his state.. before his body ran cold. his hands limply falling by his side, eyes freezing and unfocused..he died.

taekwoon widened his eyes. he didn't believe that his lover left him. "wonshik?" he just couldn't believe it.."please..i'm not ready.." he breaths shaking him a bit but with no response from the other... he lost him. "NO!" tears came flowing as he yelled out his lover's name burying his head into the crook of the neck of the unbreathing body before him, he cried and sobbed asking why did god got him through such misery, asking him why it didnt take him instead of his lover..his questions weren't answered as he was left there to be eaten by the ghost of memories. all alone..

after wonshik had deceased, taekwoon found no purpose to his live, he kept wailing for days, for years, he forgot as he stopped counting a long time ago. he had forgetten the smell of fresh air, the feeling of a the winter's sun warming his body. he only wallowed in grief, sadness and sorrow for what felt like eternity all alone with the shadow of a lonely and a broken heart to be crept upon, hunted by memories as his eyes only looked at his lover's pictures crying his eyes out sobbing until he felt like he'd died out of this world a long time ago..

for years he did not forget nor forgive what the world had bestowed upon him, nor did he do anything about it..

he'd miss meals, unable to even feel hunger until he couldn't move. his mother would come and forcefully push a few spoons in until he had the power to fight her back pushing her away so he can keep himself creeping in the darkness.. it continued for no end ..but his heart and body could not bare such weight for long...

he knew his health is gradually going down, but he didn't care as he only had wonshik in his mind.

he thought he lost his reason to live, the reason to breath air.. until he once came across his lover's notebooks.. his lover used to only share so little of what he was planning to build, but to what taekwoon could remember his lover has seaked to free the human body of it's minimum abilities, he seaked to offer an eternal life to the human body..this idea had consumed him. he wanted to find a way to make the human body last. he thought of how much of a waste it was for what the human body had to go through, waiting to be plagued by a disease or to straight go the ground by the effect of age. such a waste it was... why would humans be there and live and struggle only to die..it was meaningless to him.                                          

he had dreamed of an eternal life. a life where he could live for ever..taekwoon thought of how ironic it was..someone seeking a refuge from the ground had been the first to be in it so much for running from the fry pan only to go straight to the fire... 

taekwoon then had this idea, he could do what he lover couldn't, rather what he didn't live long to fulfill.. he had finally found a new puropse in his life...           

his journey wasn't easy..he stayed years only studying what his lover had written and thought of..it wasn't easy, but he managed..

he slowly started creating limbs and then going for parts such as the brain and the heart and how he should look like and what material was proper to build all of this with..it took far too long..but he finally build it ...what he craved to accomplish has finally turned into one piece in front of him. finally..he made it exactly to look like his lover ..young and beautiful...
he loved it. it couldn't be more perfect..

but as soon as turned it on, the machine kept looking coldly at him as if it was going kill him, it was hard for him getting looked down like that by the same face of his lover but he didn't care, he knew he had to be patient, he had to love it and cherish it. after all it reminded him of wonshik and he couldn't be more satisfied. he liked how good it felt to have his presence again..

"hi..wonshik." he smiled looking at him, it was his first smile in years.., he doesn't even remember the last time his lips curved to form such thing even his cheek's muscles began to tickle at the new feeling, he already began to like this cyborg he built. it gave the same aura as his lover did...

"wonshik.." he breaths as he falls to his knees clinching his hands at the fabric covering his chest sobbing by the machine's feet, he felt overwhelmed as he started remembering how his lover was to him, how he treated him, how he loved him, how he kissed him, his heart couldn't take the wave of these memories ..they hurt so much..
yet the machine didnt waver or even move for a bit, it had wonshik's face but it wasnt him. he had failed...

he moved his hands to cup ravi's face,"wonshik.."  cold feeling instantly brushed through his veins he expected it to lean on his touch and smile back at him but the machine absolutely did nothing rather it kept looking as if it was looking beyond him. taekwoon felt darkness swell his world again...

a thought came down to him. this was not his lover, his lover was gentle, kind, caring, loving ,and most of all he told him he loved him everytime he woke up or went to sleep or secretly in the middle of the street when none was watching them causing taekwoon to furiously blush,shyly grining and uttering the same words back.. or that kiss he received everytime he got home from work, he loved him too dearly yet life was too unfair taking away what he cherished most.. way too soon.

he was about to give up hope when wonshik eyes lightened up to a strong shade of bright blue for a moment and then going back to brown, he looked into the old and sad eyes of taekwoon who felt the piercing gaze go through him like lightning..he felt a bit intimaded by it..but his fear had been pushed off when the machine cupped his face gently pulling him closer to his face..he gaze had entirelly changed going from a cold one to a gentle and embrassing one . taekwoon could have sworn that he felt the same gaze as wonshik's and he couldn't help but shed a few tears on.. he missed those eyes who kept looking directly at his..he had missed them...

he felt lips of steel try to kiss his chapped ones, it was a clumsy kiss but he managed to smile through it, he felt loved again..and he had missed that feeling so much...

but taekwoon was getting old, on top of it all he was ill ..and he didn't have much time left..his decision to refuse therapy had finally gave it's result...

days passed so quickly, his coughing got worse, fevers had became a common occasion..he didn't have much of an appetite to begin with and to top it off he was too skinny for his age.. and he was gradually losing hair...

he wanted to leave this life..to where his lover is. it seemed like a good idea.. he finally felt a bit of happiness knowing he'd die the same way his lover did, he couldn't wait to see him again...

the cyborg kept by his side through those few days that didn't feel like they were long for even a week, they passed so fast with wonshik's company who couldn't talk due to taekwoon neglecting to make the vocal cords for the cyborg. he laughed and cried and they were tears of joy.. and most importantly he smiled he finally got to see a glimpse of brightness in his life ..but life once again had to interfere, she just had to play her role of being the merciless monster she has always been...

he there lied on his bed with a pale face, chapped lips, eye bags darker than ever, cheek bones showing as if he was a skeleton, breath was almost gonna skip him for good... he looked longingly at the cyborg's sad face, it was wonshik's, wonshik is sad.. tears wellling up in his eyes..he has made wonshik cry..the latter never made him cry he always made him laugh no matter what ..yet he wasn't able to do the same..he wanted to cry but couldn't.. through years did his eyes dry out of them..

suddenly, and without any anouncement. the cyborg dragged his hands away from where he placed them over taekwoon's hands and ed it in his chest, electricity going off in every direction wires breaking free sending dangerous electricity near the spaces it reached, one of wonshik's eyes broke from brown to light blue, his eye was shaking, he lightly moved his hands right and left before he took his still attached heart out offering it in both of his hands to teakwoon, he was muttering some words but since he was a mute he only kept crying and moving his lips uttering unheard words, he looked like he is about to break down for good..again ..in front of taekwoon's eyes.. he reached his shaking hands and slowly pulled the cyborg's face closer to his, inspecting it before kissing him.. his last kiss.

 " i love you ." he mutters before his last breath escaped his lips.

the machine cried, he couldn't handle the unsual feeling he felt, it was unbearable.., he couldn't handle nor understand what he was feeling ..it was too much..he started tearing himself apart. throwing his body parts in every direction, aggressively taking all the wires out, slowly he had became just the same as his master..a body that couldn't move anymore..

A/N:

hii~~

i hope you enjoyed this one shot ^o^ i'd love to hear you're thoughts about it ^^

i was listening to words to say while writing it..i love that song! it makes me cry everytime!! can't wait for the LR comeback T^T