Day by day passed and for each day, I feel loved. More.

Day by day passed and for each day, she smiles to me. Much a lot.

Day by day passed and for each day, we’re getting strong and stronger.

Our days become lighter and brighter, members also living our life happily. No more tears or the sorrowful silence among us. I’m happy. Finally we’re getting back to normal, finally we act like what we used to be. Before Jeongyeon’s leaving.

Talk about Jeongyeon, tomorrow is her birthday.

Yes, tomorrow is November 1st.

We are going to hold a party to celebrate it in our dorm, not because we’re still mourning her but that’s actually the opposite. We’re still believe Jeongyeon is still around us even though it already passed her 100th day. And me too. I know I never talk about her in front of other members but deep down, I always thinking about her. I feel guilty. I feel like I’m the reason behind her leaving. I feel a huge loss of sister whom cared to me the most.

But I don’t want to talk about the sadness, tomorrow is Jeongyeon’s day and I’ll make sure it will be the best birthday for her up there.

This is the next day...

I wake up with the noisy from the kitchen.

Turns out Nayeon, Mina, Jihyo and Sana are making the cake for tonight’s party. Wait... It doesn’t look like they’re cooking? More like they’re putting everything they could find on the cake, it has too many toppings now. Oh my god don’t they remember we’re still on diet?! I’m laughing at them. Not because the mess they made but seeing Nayeon and Mina talking together is a pleasing view.

They started cooling the tense down after our visit on Jeongyeon’s 100th day. And I would believe Jeongyeon has somehow an effect on their sudden lets-be-friend-again.

I can’t stop smiling until the bell of our dorm rang...

“I’ll take it”, said me while walking to the door. After turning the knob and pulled the door wide opened, there’s this beautiful figure in front of me. I know her well, she’s like our unnie afterall.

“Just with the right person. I need to give you this, Son Chaeyoung.”

The way she called my full name tells me there’s something wrong but, again, I won’t take any negative thinking for today’s sake. “What is this, Seungyeon-unnie?”

“Open and read it by yourself”, Seungyeon turned and was ready to leave the door. But she suddenly stopped her movement, she faced me again but this time with more flat expression. Seungyeon is scary to be honest, if only I don’t remember she is an actress maybe I’ll think that emotionless face is her usual daily expression... “We cleaned our Jeong’s room this morning and I found this......letter, for you. Now, please excuse me”

And Seungyeon walked away.

I pushed the door closed again, looking at the simple white envelope in my hand. It literally a simple one because there’s nothing written on it. How can Seungyeon-unnie so sure this is for me?

Out of curiosity, I opened the enveloped and pulled out the also white paper inside.

Dear my little cub, my nojam dongsaeng.

*thump*

What is this?

Why is my heart beating fast just because the first sentence?

I looked around and everywhere. I’m sure I read it in my mind but why... Why am I hearing someone reading it for me?

How have you been?

I don’t know when will you read this but I really want to say something.

Can we talk about it only between us?

This is...

I don’t know why but I told myself I should find a place to read this letter alone.

Passing the living room, I went inside the bathroom and locked the door. I’m sure other members ar