Writing used to be a part of my life but then I just lost my muse maybe because the genuine feeling that I always have decided to disappear to thin air like how you did when you leave me. I try to understand that you were gone so you can pursue your dream however do you know you are the reason why I have so many ideas and inspiration for my writings. You are my story, my muse, inspiration and most of all you are my motivation to show a better side of me. I still remember how contagious your laugh were, how you melt my heart with that sweet words of yours and foremost how   you never fail to look me in the eyes alongside your bunny like smile while you tell me that you will always be here for me no matter what is the situation. I know it’s a lie because we are still young when best frare my muse and inspiration. Still after the heartbroken you had gave me I still want you to know I will always be standing at the same spot waiting for you .

Knowing you was never a part of my plan since I do not even know about your existence and neither do you to me . However fate never care about us does it all it wants is for us to be happy but broken at the same time since life is always like that. I tell you what even when life gave me lemon in a form of  the most caring human being I have ever met the regret of knowing you will never exist in my dictionary since you are one of the few that I do not want to lose. Your words are the medication of my anxious heart and your nectar taste like words are the reason why I still have the reason to be happy and grateful of my very own existence everyday in my heart the words thank you will always meant for you. As much I want to have you for myself I can’t because the most special place in your heart is taken by another but still having you as my best friend and you have the same thoughts is enough for me.

You show me not all human beings are the same and you proof to me that expressing your worried or doubt can ease the worried heart how lucky I am to have you as my shoulder to cry on. Every time I told how worried I was or depressed I am you never failed to lend me your precious time just hearing me blabbering about nothing and everything at once. At night I will ask God what did I do to meet such a good friend like you and every time I stare to oblivion I wonder if I didn’t turn my head to my right side that night would I ever notice you, will we ever be friends if I did not talk to you that night, will the heartbroken that I’m feeling right now would be happier. This question will always appear in my head whenever I’m thinking about us because your existence in my life are like snow in Urk that only came every 100 hundred years. You are not always there for me but when I need someone to lean on in my hardest time you never failed to be with me how can I not fall for you when you treat me like a fragile glass.

 How much I want to shout at your face that I still love you and how much I regret letting you go when you gave me your all to me but I chose to let you down. The heartbreak I gave you torn you apart I notice that, how much weight you had lost and how your bloodshot eyes result from crying. It’s even worse you still manage to flash me that bunny like smile that used and still comfort me even after what happen. When I found you had found someone else to replace me I thought I would be okay but turn out my condition become worst, I still remember how you ran to me when I lose my balance during P.E class and the glare your girlfriend gave me when you immediately took me in your arms carrying me like a groom would to his bride. The day after that I know you got into a fight with her but still you wait for me during recess and accompany me to my classes and whenever I ask you whether your girlfriend know about it or not your answer was only “ you are my best friend”. Honestly I was confused but I don’t think I have any right to question you so I did not.

Suddenly on 23th June 2015 you told me you will be moving to Seoul leaving our hometown and when  I ask when you are going to come back your answer break my heart. You were not sure whether you are ever coming back here, I know ever since we first talk about each other interest I know you always had a dream of becoming an idol and me who had personally seen your skill know that you are capable of becoming more than just and idol in South Korea . It was hard to let you go that night, the tears rolled down my cheek and bravely I went to hug you after years not doing that it felt really nice to be in your embrace. I still remember your soft chuckle when I sob on your chest as you my hair like a brother would towards his younger sister. The morning I was supposed to accompany you with your family started off great, my morning was greeted with your warm message saying you are waiting for me but still I was controlling the butterfly effect you gave me since you already have someone else. The weather was very nice, as I dressed up in my knee length deep blue dress, and let my wavy hair loose the spring breeze blew through my hair as if like someone is comforting me.

As I arrived at the train station you waved your hands in my direction, like a little girl I ran to you and hug you. You laugh at my action so does your parents who had known me since our middle school years. I scanned around looking for your girlfriend as if you are know what I’m thinking about “We decided to break up since she cannot handle long distance relationship”. I gasped at your answer immediately I hug you “I’m so sorry to hear that” as I rub your back those word came out naturally from my mouth. You returned my hug and buried your face on my shoulder thank goodness your parents were not there “Please don’t leave me (y/n) just stay as my best friend I’m already happy. I cannot take the pain of people leaving me anymore”. He confessed to me how vulnerable he was at that very moment, I just hug him because all he needs that time was a comfort from a good friend.

As the time for him to go is getting nearer we just talk about our future plan and how I would attend his every concert once he debut. I’m glad to see that he was genuinely happy around me and when the announcement for his train, his parents and me accompany to the departure gate as he hug his parents he finally turn to me and this time it was him who hug me first. I notice it was hard for me to let go of this giant bunny in front of me , yet again the tears stream down as I silently cried in his embrace again. Once again he did the same action he did to me yesterday and I realized how much I’m going to miss him . Finally he went through the departure gate he turn to our direction one last time waving his hand while flashing his infamous bunny smile.

I will miss you so much Kang Daniel

Author Note:

If you want to me to write a sequel about this story just comment down below or maybe write about another wanna one member.I hope all of the produce 101 fans will like this story of mine and please continue showing your love for our Wanna One member also Our Center Kang Daniel.I appriciate all the time you spent in reading my story, thank you :)