a/n: yay for last minute editing and finishing homework. the long awaited first chapter! i hope it lives up to expectations but also it will probaly be rewritten later. i've already rewritten this like five times what's one more. also, kokobop is a kokobanger.

The capital city is just as Sejeong remembers: loud and busy enough for two children to get lost in the crowds. She had enjoyed many a day away from the tensions of the palace on these streets running around dressed in clothes borrowed from the palace maids. The memories tug at the corners of her lips as she sits underneath the shade of a small café, nursing a cup of coffee that tastes like home.

Everything around her unleashes a new wave of nostalgia: the sharp tang of the coffee, the mingling of the different accents from around the kingdom. Even the clothing brought the smell of fresh wool and heavy blankets to her mind. It never got cold enough in the southern kingdom of the wildcats to wear anything other than light clothing, unless they’re in the depths of winter.

She tries to remember the good things, before she continues on to her destination. It’s easy out here, where all of her memories are of her friends, and not of hunger.

Jongdae’s laugh, bright and distinct, filters through her mind first. His voice as a young child, shouting into the wild as he stands on top of a rock twice his size, I’m the king of the world!

Joonmyun’s strained but fond smile when he finds the two of them there, his soft reprimands and caring hands as he patches their scrapes before the king finds out.

Jongin’s innocent giggle when Jongdae and Joonmyun made time to play with him – they’d all been so young, but Jongin the youngest, and he had been able to find amusement in everything.

She wishes she had been able to watch them grow. Instead, she had been surprised by their sudden growth spurts and the deepness of their voices the few times they were able to visit her.

The look in their eyes, every time the realized that they were powerless to help her.

Bad thoughts.

Sejeong frowns into her coffee, wondering if she can really go through with this. She would face the king eventually – she knows this even without her powers telling her so. Nothing goes on in the palace that the king does not know about, much less the return of his precious oracle. The kingdom’s treasure, the voice in her mind says.

(The voice is an echo of the king’s. He would find a twisted pleasure in knowing that he had haunted her all these years, despite being a country away.)

Maybe, it occurs to her, that’s why she must go through with this. How better to defeat her demons than head-to-head with the heart of them all? Besides, Yixing would just drag her back if he heard that she showed up on the cat’s doorstep again. We had a plan, he would say. It would have worked, because he was fond of endless optimism. You deserve peace, because he had tried to bring it to her every day she spent hiding from it.

With new determination, Sejeong gulps down the rest of her drink and stands, leaving a tip on the table along with her cup. The capital city is big and this café is on the outskirts; she has a ways to go before reaching the palace gates.

The sun is high in the air as she walks, but its intensity is offset by the early spring chill. It makes for a pleasant day and Sejeong finds herself actually enjoying the walk, weaving through the crowded street and winding paths with the ease of a native. She blends in here, with a set of new clothes she’d bought when she entered the kingdom, her cloak both matching the weather and hiding the mark that identifies her as an oracle.

Along the way, she catches bits and pieces of conversations, but doesn’t stop to eavesdrop – it’s the same rumors and gossip she’s heard ever since entering the kingdom – until one name catches her attention.

“The Second Prince is coming back today.”

The Second Prince. Jongdae, Sejeong thinks, a sudden flood of yearning bringing her to a halt. She leans against a nearby wall, pretending to be waiting for someone, to listen.

The second person scoffs. “He must have heard the rumors.”

“Who hasn’t?”

Sejeong finally spots the speaker, a man with a group of his friends. They look to be soldiers on break – she thinks one or two of them might look vaguely familiar. The thought makes her turn away again, hoping that they don’t glance over and notice her.

“Do you really think she’s back?”

“The oracle? You can’t come back from the dead.”

They’re talking about her. Sejeong pushes off the wall is alarm and starts walking again, regulating her pace in an effort to calm her heart. Fear and dread pulse through her in equal measures at the thought of the king knowing that she’s back already. Could their plan have leaked? It wasn’t much of a plan, but it was something and that something made her feel marginally better.

It isn’t until she’s far away that she processes the last part. You can’t come back from the dead. Is that what the king had told the people? That she had died, rather than run away? To save face, she guesses. He had always been far too proud, no matter how many times she had told him that it would be his eventual undoing.

Jongdae and Jongin must also think that she is dead, then. Joonmyun might have loved his brothers but he would not have broken his promise to her.

How would they react to the sight of her? Their childhood friend, once lost, thought to be dead. A ghost of the past – and would “ghost” even be a misnomer? She’s not the innocent child she once was, but a shell of the woman she could have, should have been.

For the hundredth time, Sejeong wonders if this was a mistake.

And for the hundredth time, Sejeong steels herself and trudges on through her doubts. She can see the palace in front of her, anyway, the tallest spire towering over the other buildings, too close to give up now.

It isn’t much longer until Sejeong turns the corner and comes to the outer gates of the palace. Iron railings block her path, guard towers on either side. She looks past them, equal measures of trepidation and wistfulness mellowing her gaze.

You can’t come back from the dead.

Sejeong catches one of the guards looking her way and continues to scan the palace, attempting to look like a harmless tourist while hiding her face. Maybe coming to see the palace first (home, sweet home, ha) wasn’t the smartest idea.

She turns away, intending to continue with her plan and find the baker’s son, when she finds herself suddenly in the path of a trotting horse. The crowd in front of it parts to both sides, but Sejeong is frozen in the gaze of its rider, familiar dark eyes seeming to pierce her.

As Jongdae gets closer, he seems to recognize her, confusion in the furrow of his brows. Sejeong slips away through the crowd, hoping that she’s lost in it by the time he looks back.

Soon, she hears the click of the horse’s hooves on the cobbled streets start again and the gates close with a clank. Sejeong keeps walking.

.

Even the stars seem different in the Land of Wolves, despite the sky being the same. Sejeong breathes in the night air, closes her eyes, feels the cool caress of a slight breeze and the sharp blades of grass tickling her exposed skin at the backs of her hands and ankles. She lies in a small clearing in the forest near the capital city, a private spot she, Jongdae, and Joonmyun had discovered one day as kids. They had used it as a meeting and hiding spot whenever they needed privacy or just wanted to be by themselves. No one else knew about it, although she had told Yixing about its so that he could convey her message to Joonmyun.

The night is still young, but she wonders if Joonmyun will show. The anxiety of not knowing how things are going eats at her, despite her attempts to find peace in the quiet night.

What seems like hours later, but could be just minutes (although it's also entirely possible that she had dozed off, eyes closed a moment or two too long) she catches the rustling of leaves indicative of an approaching being. She sits up, equal parts alarmed and anticipating, when a familiar face comes into view.

"Joonmyun," she says, all of a sudden choking back tears. "You came."

Joonymun drops to his knees once he reaches her, stark relief in his features. "It's been a while." His hand hesitates in the air, unsure of whether to reach out for her or not.

"Years," she corrects, "Four years. Gods, I missed you so much." Sejeong takes his hand to pull him into a hug. In his warm, familiar embrace, her vision flashes across her mind again, reminding her of her mission.

"Missed you, too," he murmurs into her hair before she pulls away. "Jongdae missed you more, though. It was hard on him."

Her heart pounds harder at his words. "Right, I heard the king declared me to be dead. Classy." She smiles, but it wavers and he catches it.

"Is something wrong? Yixing wouldn't tell me anything," Joonmyun asks. He quickly corrects himself, "Well, something must be wrong, for you to have come back. What is it?"

Part of Sejeong tells her not to say anything until she knows more. Plus, she doesn't make a habit of telling people that they're going to die, much less at the hands of their own brother. She trusts her instincts, if anything, so Sejeong just shakes her head and responds, "I had a vision. I can't say anything, other than I'm here to try to prevent it."

Joonmyun frowns. "It must be bad. Jeongie, are you sure that's the best idea?"

Sejeong smiles genuinely at the old nickname. "I can't just sit by and watch, this time. I was given this gift for a reason, right?"

"Yeah, your dad couldn't keep his pants buckled," Joonmyun mutters back, frowning.

Sejeong's lips twitch despite herself. Some things really haven't changed, she thinks, and the thought makes her feel better. "Joon, I need your help."

"Is it about the vision?" he eyes her warily, the corners of his lips still turned downwards.

"No," she lies, "I just want to see Jongdae again."

Joonmyun seems to deflate at her answer, dropping from his squat to the lie down on the ground beside her. He crosses his arms underneath his head and looks up at the stars. When Sejeong follows suit, he says, "Jongdae... When I said that he took it the hardest, I wasn't lying. He's changed the most out of the three of us, I think. I'll help you, but don't be surprised when he's not the same kid you remember."

"Jongdae?" Of all people? she wants to ask, What could he possibly be like to warrant this warning?

"You'll have to see for yourself. Let's talk about something else," Joonmyun proposes.

"Like what?"

"Well, how were the cats? Yixing says you stayed with them for the last three years. Where were you before that?" Joonmyun shoots her question after question, until she laughs and the tension in the air is broken.

Sejeong regales Joonmyun with stories of foreign countries and their natural wonders, the people she met on her journey, and random anecdotes. She does most of the talking, though Joonmyun occasionally replies with a story or two of his own, and this is how they spend the rest of the night.

In the morning, Sejeong wakes to find her head nestled against Joonmyun's arm, the sun barely showing over the trees. She's still dead tired, but also more at peace than the day before. She shakes Joonmyun awake, and soon they're both blinking blearily around the clearing.

"You should probably go back to the palace. Unless you make a habit of sneaking off at night and returning at the crack of dawn the next morning," she tells him, a smirk pulling at her lips.

Joonmyun sighs and shakes his head, but he's smiling fondly. "I will. What will you do? Do you have a place to stay? Do you want to come back to the palace?"

"I'm here posing as Yixing's personal maid. I'll be at the palace later today, but I'm meeting Yixing in the city first." Sejeong takes Joonmyun's offered hand and he hoists her up. "Thank you for meeting with me, after all this time."

Joonmyun softens. "What a thing to thank me for. I'm glad you've been well. I hope this, whatever it is, is settled soon."

"Me, too, Joon," Sejeong replies softly. She presses her nails into her palms behind Joonmyun's back as he hugs her to keep from crying.

They walk through the forest together in silence. Once Sejeong can see where the treeline turns into open fields, she stops and turns to Joonmyun. "Be safe. And wash up once you get back. You don't smell very princely right now."

Laughing, Joonmyun replies, "You're one to talk. Say thanks to Yixing for me, for taking care of you. I'll see you soon, then."

Sejeong nods, once, and then Joonmyun is walking away through the trees. "See you soon," she whispers to his back.

Once he's far enough away for there to be no one watching for her, Sejeong also exits the forest, going for a different route into the capital city.

.

"How was your meeting?" Yixing asks her, once they're in the relative privacy of the shop of a trusted friend of Joonmyun's. He's standing on the opposite side of a cloth barrier shielding her while she changes into standard servants’ clothes.

"Fine," she answers. "This doesn't cover my wrist, Yixing."

"The washcloth," he replies. "The red marks my servants. All of them wear one when we're visiting foreign countries." Which is often, she realizes, and a rush of gratitude rushes through her for what isn't the first time since she told Yixing about her crazy plan. "Around the wrist is a bit conspicuous, but I'll tell the others to wear it there, too."

"Thank you, Yixing." Sejeong rushes to tie the red cloth around her wrist, hiding the snake mark that winds around her arm.

"You're welcome," he replies, smile clear in his voice. "Are you ready now?"

"Ready as I'll ever be," Sejeong says as she opens the curtain, meeting Yixing's gaze. She holds her head high and her back straight, taking a deep breath. "But I'm about to walk into the lion's den, so forgive me if I'm a bit nervous."

Yixing only smiles reassuringly at her. "You'll be fine. I'm with you. If anything, the king wouldn't risk starting a war with us wildcats by hurting you."

Sejeong makes a noise in acknowledgement. "Let's just get this over with."

"Keep your head down," Yixing instructs as they walk towards the exit. "If anyone tries to talk to you, pretend you don't understand. Use what you've picked up from us in the past three years. Worse comes to worst, go to Joonmyun." He nods at the owner of the store as they leave, while Sejeong runs his instructions through her mind. They've been over at least a dozen times already, but it calms both of them.

"Now, let's go save your friends."

Sejeong walks right into the palace. The lion's den, as she had called it earlier. Her heart beats wildly in her chest, a reminder that she is both alive and very, very vulnerable. She keeps her head lowered, following at an appropriate distance behind Yixing. At the very least, being with a distinguished guests means that the others don't pay too much attention to her from fear of offending the wildcat ambassador. Still, she avoids looking other people in the eyes – anywhere other than the ground, honestly – and hopes that she has grown enough that anyone who had encountered her as a child wouldn't recognize her now.

That's one thing to be thankful for, she realizes, that the king had been so possessive of her that he hadn't let many others see her.

She never thought that'd she'd be thankful for that. It chews at her insides, makes itself at home next to her anxiety over the situation.

But they pass by the numerous people flitting about and no one asks who she is or places her as the oracle they believe to be dead. When Sejeong notices that they are heading towards the guest rooms, she finally begins to calm down.

Then, a voice stops her in her tracks and sends chills down her spine.

"Yixing?”

They stop moving, Sejeong's heart in and eyes cast resolutely at the floor. She can tell that Yixing is tense as well, his back stiffening at the voice.

"It is you! It's been a while, welcome back," Jongdae says. Sejeong can see his friendly grin in her mind and wonders why Joonmyun had warned her.

"Thank you for the kind welcome, Second Prince." Yixing lowers his head slightly and Sejeong follows suit. "Huahua, you can go on ahead and prepare my bath."

It takes a moment for Sejeong to recognize the nickname the wildcats had given her, but she quickly follows up with a deep bow and a soft "excuse me, Your Highness," before scurrying past Jongdae to Yixing's room. She feels time slow as she passes him, the longing of four years of missing him crashing down all at once.

She swallows past the lump growing in , stubbornly blinks away tears, and proceeds to quickly enter Yixing's room and shut the door behind her.

.

It's raining. Jongdae stands in the central courtyard of the palace, glaring at something (or someone) Sejeong cannot see. He's getting drenched and she wants nothing more than to rush out and bury him in towels and blankets and sit him by a warm fire.

You'll get sick, she thinks, just as he moves and Sejeong can see the person standing across from him. Joonmyun?

She sees the animosity in their eyes and her heart leaps into .

"You wouldn't kill me, would you?" Joonmyun asks, hands out in a placating gesture. "Your precious older brother, whom you love. Think of everything I've done for you, Jongdae. Everything I did, I did for you. You, and Jongin, and Sejeong."

A thunderous look passes over Jongdae's features. "You don't get to say her name like that." An accompanying roll of thunder drowns out his next words, and then Sejeong watches as Jongdae calls down a bolt of lightning and strikes Joonmyun down where he stands.

She wakes up with Joonmyun's look of surprise burnt into the back of her eyelids.

a/n: what is pacing. what is characterization. what is writing.