Dongwan sat out in the empty seats of the stadium after concert practice. They had all worked very hard and were ready for the concert the next day. Everyone had headed to the locker room in the lower level but he had wanted to sit here for another moment to clear his mind. He had tried to focus on the routines and the songs but his eyes had wandered over to Andy so much he had been the black hole once again. With a huge sigh he stood up and walked through the seats to the stage and went into the elevator that would take him down. He reached the locker room and when he walked in he heard the sound of water. He went to the locker that held his things and stripped. He wrapped a towel around his waist and grabbed his shower supplies and headed to the steamy showers. When he got there only Andy was left. He leaned against the wall, his forearms pressed to the white tile. His head was down and the water sluiced down his firm and toned body. Wannie froze and almost turned and walked out, he could just as easily take a shower at home. Just then Andy looked up and turned his head.

“Hey Wannie…..I thought you left already”, he said with a smile. Wannie smiled at the younger man nervously.

“I was thinking. You and I are the last ones here,” He walked across the wet floor and took his place under a shower that was a few away spots from Andy. He set his things on the floor at his feet and turned the water on. It came out cold at first and he yelped. But he was also thankful for the cold blast at the same time. He was embarassingly aroused at the sight at the object of his long secret obsession so near and he wanted to keep that secret to himself. The water warmed up and he got his hair wet and grabbed his shampoo and started to wash his hair. With he eyes closed he didn’t see that Andy stared at him.

Andy watched Dongwan closely, he could see the firm ripple of his back muscles and the way his arms flexed as he washed his hair. He bit his lip and turned away. With a small sigh he grabbed his body wash and squirted some out onto his hands and began to them over his body and wash it.

Dongwan had just rinsed the soap out of his eyes and when he turned to look at Andy he prayed the water would go cold again. Andy’s body was covered with the slick soap and he had bent over to wash his calves and ankles. His was tight and high and the muscles in his legs stood out in relief against the rest of his smooth skin. Dongwan closed his eyes and tried not to picture that as he grabbed his conditioner and squirted it into his hand. As he worked his hands through his hair he heard a soft chuckle from Andy.

“Not sure what you heard, but using body wash on your hair isn’t the best way to make it silky soft”, Andy said and remembered the time he had found the older man asleep in the back seat of the van on the way to a schedule. He had sat down beside him quietly and ran his fingers through his hair. It had been so soft that he didn’t want to stop but had to when Wannie woke. Andy had been in love with him for as long as he could remember but he knew that the love he felt wouldn’t be well received in their culture so he pushed it deep down and tried not to think of his friend that way. He had failed, of course. The heart wants what it wants.

“Uhhh thanks Andy”, Dongwan said sheepishly as he rinsed the soap out of his hair and grabbed the right bottle and quickly conditioned his hair and rinsed it out. He heard the shower shut off and when he looked up Andy was gone. He breathed a huge sigh of relief and finished the rest of his shower quickly. He grabbed his things and wrapped the towel around his waist and walked back out to the locker room. He didn’t see Andy but his things were still there. He sat down and grabbed another towel and started to dry off.

“Wannie….”, he heard a soft whisper and turned his head and saw that Andy stood in the doorway to where the toilets were. He could see that Andy trembled as he walked slowly to him and sat down beside him. He, like Dongwan, only had a towel wrapped around his waist.

“I need to tell you something, Wannie.” He was scared to tell him because he was scared his confession would be negatively received.

“You can always tell me anything, Andy ah”, Dongwan’s voice was soft and caring but he felt his temperature rise at Andy’s closeness.

Andy bit his lip nervously and gripped his knees tightly before he started to speak in broken sentences.

“Dongwan…..I…..need to tell you”, he stopped and took a deep breath and exhaled shakily before he continued, “we’ve known each other for a long time….more than half my life. I was just a kid when I met you, right?” He looked at Dongwan for confirmation. The older man nodded his head slowly and Andy continued.

“And I looked up to you….and and admired you….and somehow over the years…..all the years we spent close together, working, playing…..somehow I started to fall in love with you.” His eyes were closed and he whispered the last four words so quietly Dongwan almost didn’t hear them but as he realized what Andy had said his heart started to race. He turned to the younger man that trembled beside him and took his hand and squeezed it gently.

“Andy ah….why did you decide to tell me today? Why now?” He whispered as he turned Andy’s hand over and looked at his palm and used his free hand to trace the lines in it and found the love line palm readers always talked about. It was this line he traced over and over gently.

“Eric’s getting married and I just……I wanted you to know. Something in me needed you to know. We are all getting older and I wanted you to know before you found someone and got married too.” Andy tried to hold in the shivers that Dongwan’s touch sent through his body.

Suddenly Dongwan turned Andy to face him and he brought Andy’s hand up and placed it on his bare chest so that Andy could feel the way his heart raced.

“Do you feel that, Andy ah? The way my heart races when you touch me? Have you noticed the way I can’t take my eyes off you? How I couldn’t take my eyes off you today at practice?”, he sighed and brought Andy’s hand to his lips and kissed each finger softly as he looked into his eyes. He finally got the chance to say what his heart had screamed silently for years.

“Andy ah…..I fell in love with you so long ago I can’t even remember when it started. I just know that when I look at you, all I can see is love…..a love that I had to hide away….but not anymore.” He put one hand on his shoulder and pulled him closer. They were face to face, eye to eye and Andy was the one that closed that distance and then they were lip to lip. It was awkward at first; their noses bumped and Andy wasn’t sure where to put his hands but soon they found their way and their lips parted and closed softly and Andy put his hands on Dongwan’s waist as the older man’s hands found their way into Andy’s still damp hair and played with the ends gently. When they finally ended the kiss, both were breathless from a lack of oxygen and the intense feelings that washed over them. Andy rested his head on Dongwan’s shoulder and closed his eyes. Dongwan just held him and his cheek gently.

They sat there like that until their hair had dried then they released each other and stood to dress. No words were spoken, nor were they needed. As they left the locker room Andy slipped his hand into Dongwan’s and together left building and went out to their cars. They shared a brief kiss before each got into their own cars and as they pulled out, Andy followed Dongwan to his place. It felt like he was going home for the first time since they had all lived together in the dorms so many years ago.